The Turning of the Bright World (rough mixes)

Songs from "Raped X God" (the second volume from the four CD boxed set "the Drug Years"}

Written in 1975; recorded in 2012. A 47 minute song...

The Arc

An album written and recorded in one month in June, 2012. I call it "6/12"

Songs recorded originally on 8-track recorder between 1997-99

Boy Scout (the third volume from the four CD boxed set "the Drug Years"}

A Quiet Night on the Mooncam

A quiet night on the mooncam
Another visit to the morgue
A crowded place but it's okay
There's always room for one more

And Calaban has been busy
He is hands on
No matter how much it's never enough
But God is all and all is one

All the colors of the spectrum
All the dollars in the bank
Examine your risk assessment
You worry about all the wrong things

A quiet night on the mooncam
The silence of the stars
Saturn and Cassiopea
Ganymede and Mars

Making plans with a deathwish
Dodging in the nick of time
Everytime someone saves your life
You spit right in their eye

You can embrace surrender
So we are taught by the wise
But let us do what people do
They satisfy their desires

A quiet night on the mooncam
The silence of the stars
Saturn and Cassiopea
Gantmede and Mars

Calaban has been busy
He is so hands on
No matter how much it's never enough
But God is all and all is one

Written and Produced by Paul Roessler and Paul Boutin at Kitten Robot Studios

Drums Joe Berardi
Bass Nathan York
Guitars Paul Boutin
Piano and vocals Paul Roessler

A Quiet Night On The Mooncam

Analise I'm rolling on the ride
I've been waiting now for all these deadly days
To fall into your eyes
But sure as a tide the tempest rise
And wash away the light
Sure enough the morning star came right on time

Analise there was nothing there at all
But I went on a little run tonight
And it spun into a fall
So close to overdose but missed it by a mile
I'm a wounded soul and I'm out of fight.

There's a devil inside
There's a devil inside
There's a devil inside
Let him die

Analise can we turn back the hands of time?
Can we sing so hard that everything makes sense and somehow rhymes?
Or fall away, swim in azure waves
Escape to a place where I can't find you to darken all your days
Sure as the tide I'm on the ride blind without a guide
Maybe I will be your morning star tonight

There's a devil inside
There's a devil inside
There's a devil inside
Let him die

Lyrics Paul Roessler
Music Paul Roessler Paul Boutin
Guitar Paul Boutin
Bass Nathan York
Drums Joe Berardi

Analise

Maker

Get ready to meet your maker everybody's got to meet their maker
Let's go look out below
Everybody's gotta raise a savior are you ready for the big creator 
Oh no just let it go
Everybody gonna see you later kinda doubt it but maybe later
Oh no I don't know
Going down

Maker


Elephant Man

And the seas rose, stars froze
Sky glows deathly
Eyes closed
And the white snow fell gently
To the lake, through the rain
While the rays of summer poured warmly down
And the old man died
Leaving space for a child
Who lit up her mother's eyes
Called him home
Saying love
Draws all things to its side
Show the light girls the turning of the bright world
Tell them I bade them all goodbye smiling with laughing eyes

Elephant Man

Possibility of Psychic Phenomenon 

A sad old man with a fat cat and a hat to cover his bald patch
Nothing to come back to here
Is his ego finally cauterized?
Maybe I wouldn't be surprised he looks hurtin
Sings about himself in the third person
Reads borrowed books barely drives
Sedentary rarely flies
Microwaves his hurried meals
Flirts with the girls but never seals the deal

Lose the one and you go on
Anything can be done
But if somehow you hear me sing these words a distant ringing in your ears
A psychic line that still occurs in the silence of the night
That thing we had we said could never die
If it's still there then call me I am here waiting

Possibility Of Psychic Phenomenon

At Last

Fish out of Water

Hey spare a quarter for a blind man, an angel who fell
I fought bravely in the war between heaven and hell
I stood toe to toe against the foul and the strange

The things that I saw, they burned out my eyes
I lost the will to live and the strength to die

So many gone the brave and the pure
I think that we won, I never was sure
Now castaway here with a shipwrecked head after we
Slaughtered our enemies strangers and friends

We died at out own hands mended our wounds
Buried ourselves in deep ancient tombs
I guess I oughta know the closest thing to pure evil that you ever touched
Was yourself and no one else
And you liked it so much

The streets of this planet choke me like ghouls
I wake up drowning in stinking fetid pools
Left sad behind stranded but a detour for the well-dressed
Unconscious fools

So many gone the brave and the true
I think that we won, now I don't know about you
Now castaway here with a shipwrecked head
After we slaughtered our enemies, strangers and friends

From "Raped X God" the second part of the four CD boxed set "the Drug Years"

Fish Out Of Water

Ivory Coast

On the Ivory Coast it's snowing
And the saints and slavers are going into gold
The lovers have been fighting
It's a sign of things to come

Lost inside the golden ring the ravens on the lawn
Retrace your errant path the hope of man is gone
They had found the answer and the answer was not lost

Row row row your boat gently down the stream
Merrily merrily merrily merrily
Life is but a dream

Ivory Coast

DANCE OF THE SEVERED PARTS
 
So like an old car that limps along the tires are good but the engines gone
So we in our little way somehow go on parts of us working and some others all wrong
Sometimes the body goes on after the mind has died sometimes the body dies but the mind survives
Sometimes the head is dead but the brain remains sometimes the heart is willing but the feet are lame
 
And somewhere headless corpses are dancing pirouettes and lighting cigarettes
And bald men comb their ghostly hair amputees foxtrot through the air
 
Sometimes the body goes on after the mind has died sometimes the body dies but the mind survives
Sometimes the head is dead but the brain remains sometimes the heart is willing but the feet are lame
 
The Politician says his lines but his eyes are flat and there's nothing behind
And the teacher teach but the kids can't learn and the bibles are pounded and the books are burned
And the trumpet blows and we toast our health, we march to war but it's against ourselves and
Plugging our ears stabbing our eyes what we can't ignore we learn to deny
And somewhere severed heads spin like tops to carnival(cannibal?) music that never stops
And vicious little mutants (doctors?) with 99 eyes operate on anything they can immobilize
And somewhere eyeless mutants are watching...
 
Sometimes the body goes on after the mind has died sometimes the body dies but the mind survives
Sometimes the head is dead but the brain remains sometimes the heart is willing but the feet are lame
And when they both go you can't be far behind
Although I don't know some people do just fine...

From "Raped X God" the second part of the four CD boxed set "the Drug Years"

Dance Of The Severed Parts

Old People turn grey
Decay
Say things like:
"these kids today"
"There's gonna be hell to pay"
"You don't say"
Old People can't keep the pace
So they try to delay the race
They move so cautious they move so slow
Can't tell if they stop or they go.

Old People whatever age
Too scared to leave their cage
They've seen it all
They've done it all
They used to run
Now they can barely crawl
But they've learned from their mistakes

It isn't when you're born
It's how you ride the storm
It isn't how long you've been that counts 
It's how tight you bite and how far you pounce
Old People turn grey
Decay, say things like:
"Remember when?"
"When I was your age"
"Back in my day"
"Crime doesn't pay"
"We learned from our mistakes"

"sekatsim ruo morf denrael ew"

From "Raped X God" the second part of the four CD boxed set "the Drug Years"



Old People

River has a hole in his heart
Bowie died
And the country is tearing itself apart
And you want to stop feeling
Bask in indifference
And just stop caring
To lock your doors
Wire your windows
To sit surrounded by your futile arsenal
To bathe in the anger; taste revenge
Sight the rifle on a random victim
To blame the other
Close the borders
To give the orders
To just give in

But I have awoken now and can never fall back to sleep

I want to light secret fires in the hill above my town
Drink to oblivion and watch the houses burn down
Indulge dark temptations
Live like mine is the last generation
Deny that I love


But I have awoken now and can never fall back to sleep

Awake

All you white collar criminals I see you all each one
You're all moms and dads and uncles and aunts and somebody's daughters and sons
Y'all do unto others before they do it to you
You want to be the best that you can be and do as little as you can do.
You make so much money; you better look busy
But you're worth every penny cuz the market has been iffy
Your future looks bright and you sleep well at night
And never in your wildest dreams do you see what the numbers mean
We must not think so negatively

If I'm wrong how come I'm rich?

Doo doo doo doo doo doo do do dooo

All you white collar criminals you know you've got it made
You really don't have to do much at all and you're still very very well paid
You just kiss a little ass give a back a stab stand around and chat take a nap but not the rap listen to the grapevine always have the right time look out for #1 keep the world overrun with parasites doublespeak closed minds outright lies
Your future looks bright and you sleep well at night
And never in your wildest dreams do you see what the numbers mean
We must not think so negatively

Doo doo doo doo doo doo do do dooo

White Collar Criminals

The Sentence has been handed down
Delivered by a sad-eyed clown
It is not fair
It is nowhere
It is dry and brown
But it is final

The executioner pulls on his robes
Tired and old he moves a little slow
He's lost the thrill
But it pays the bills
On his crooked home
And it's better than starving

And we've all seen better days
As the moon shines through a sickly haze
And there is never a reason
It's just something that happened
Everything just fades away

Stop asking why
It's just an excuse to tell another lie
We love to make up stories to explain and describe
there isn't a secret
There isn't a pearl
Or a happy ending in the whole wide world
but at least they get over,

And we've all tried to toe the line
But we lose our minds
In the pouring rain
And there is never a reason
There's no hell or Edens
Every day just fades away

Bass: Kira
Guitar: Glenn Brown
Violin: Petra Haden
Piano and vocals: Paul

Black Swan

Galatea

Inspired by the book "Galatea 2.2" by Richard Powers
Suggested by William Amato
Additional vocals by Rachel Salter, Gitane Demone and Savannah Pope

Galatea

I) U (An Overture of Sorts)

II) Forgive us What we Are, Love What we Wanted to be.

All these hard lines that make us feel safe
All these soft curves we want to set straight

As I was walking to St. Ives I met a man with seven wives
Brothers sisters have I none but that man's father's my father's son
How sure of ourselves we are how full
How certain we are the pinnacle
Of consciousness and precious worth
Inheritors by divine birth
Masters of Geometry Inventors of Philosophy 
And words...

All these hard lines that make us feel safe
All these soft curves we want to set straight

Nothing is the same as anything else
Your parallels underwhelm
Identity be but a fraud the charcoal wing of the black swan
Groping metaphors for god
To simplify is falsify, the blinking of the closing mind
Narratives like fairy tales swallowed whole like candy whales
Bedtime stories of a frightened child...

All these hard lines that make us feel safe
All these soft curves we want to set straight

Bones in Denial

All just to say that you're barely part way
Stumbling down your dark hallway
First in line in the monkey parade
But clear in the rear of the light brigade
Forgive us what we are
Love what we wanted to be
Who rise from flesh to spirit know the fall
The word outleaps the world and light is all

III) H

IV) Engineer

Oh Mother of Wisdom Oh Father of Light
Lord of the Elements Master of Time
Power and Vision and Fusion and Fission
Bending cruel Nature to abject submission
But deep underneath every rational beast
The wellspring of sorrow sings

The zealot the fascist the racist the freak
The breeder the beater the cheater the priest
The victim the rapist the sadist the greatest
The one that you wish you could borrow their faces
But deep underneath every frightened retreat 
The heart of loneliness beats

 
Irony satire and alienation
The protective mask of faux sophistication
The gambler the shopper the slave to desire
The junkie the puppet the man who starts fires
But deep underneath every soul in the street
The heart of a human still beats

V) Graceful Degradation

See everything for me

VI) Marcel

Another year has passed my love
My brain's all scrambled today
When they ask I say it's all fine
I never know what to say
I love you ultimate
Ultimate love that's how it's always been
A shadow girl following wispy invisible just knowing that you exist
Locked in your temple
Bring down the universe spread it out over the keys
Shuffle through paper Love a sweet panther with no one watching but me
Even if you didn't even know me, I'd love you with all my heart   
Even if you didn't even know me, I'd love you with all my heart

Galatea

Shine

I tried everything I tried heroin cocaine
But the sun came down the sun came down the same
I dreamed clouds and trains
Beautiful castles in the rain
But the sun came out and dried it all away
And if you look in every place
Hope you find somewhere safe to stay
Where the sun can't come 
And steal your joy away
I tried water I tried wine I tried to run a million miles
There's nowhere the sun don't come the sun don't come and shine

I tried to find another life I tried to tell a million lies
But the sun just shook his head and said goodbye
And when all the clouds had cleared and the moon had disappeared
The sun came up and everybody cheered
Well if you reach the other side and you kiss the sunny skies
I hope a rainbow comes and wraps you in the night
I tried water I tried wine I tried to run a million miles
There's nowhere the sun don't come the sun don't come and shine

Shine

Risen

The hemlock laced nightshade paste I dined on now I've shined on
The fishhook mouth dragged ripping off down south but things weren't always so right on
Lazarus slept in the pages of past ages
No one comes back from the dead
But if he did he would have said:

Hold me in the morning
Rock me in the powerlines
Blast me in the furnaces
Blind me with your neon signs

The angry mad gods lobbed rocks down on top of my bad tomb
The hot hands of my soft watch spun and stopped on a dime and grinned and said: "soon."
Circled and cornered the angles got shorter
Till the path was a straight line direct to the moon
And I cried as I tried to crawl back to the womb:

Hold me in my mourning
Rock me in the powerlines
Blast me in the furnaces
Nurse me on your cyanide
Wash me in the water
Bear me on your shoulders
Take me to the harbor
Watch the tankers dancing there
Cleanse me on your freeway
Rising through the poison air
Baptise me in uranium
Take me there

The cigarette smoke choked and ropes of dope broke and rock and rolled me
Jesus saved and the butchers flayed and the boss payed slave wages but no one told me
But Lazarus opened his eyes sees the old rusty chain shiny and bright
Speaks into the light and cried.


Hold me in my mourning
Rock me in the powerlines
Blast me in the furnaces
Nurse me on your cyanide
Wash me in the water
Bear me on your shoulders
Take me to the harbor
Watch the tankers dancing there
Cleanse me on your freeway
Rising through the poison air
Baptise me in uranium
Take me there

Risen

Mechanics Of Discorporation (Part 1 of "The Arc")

5 Years


1

Faint scent of death coming
Coming
Angry? Sorry.
Stormy Monday
Fall fall falling
Taking away
Losing
Lost

Writen and Recorded 6/12/12

I tried to give up I tried to surrender
I tried to move on I tried to remember 
I tried to forget I tried to get mad 
I tried getting even I tried to be strong
I tried not to care I tried to stop breathing
I tried to be silent and I tried speaking

But it's not me, it's you

I tried doing nothing I tried to run
I tried to stop loving tried loving my freedom
I tried to embrace I tried to deny
I tried to stop thinking I tried to survive

But it's not me, it's you

When You've Tried Everything It's Time to stop Trying

No Time

Nothing's short and nothing's long, nothing's right and nothing's wrong
Nothing starts and nothing ends, nothing breaks and nothing mends.
Nothing's far and nothing's near, All you've lost is still right here
Nothing lives and nothing dies, no hellos and no goodbyes

And crawling cross the face of earth 
You count back days from death to birth
But you've got no time
Hanging up there on your cross
But everything just freeze and stops
When you've got no time

Nothing moves no water runs, everything is all at once, alive
When you've got no time
Nothing change the sun don't sink the world just sits there like a sphinx
But trapped inside the river's rush
You think and think bout nothing much

All your perfect enemies you wait to bring them to their knees
But you've got no time.
In the final throes of our disease 
Goaded by the whips of need we finally see
That there is no time
And when you lay you down to rest freed from the clock inside your chest everything shines.
'Cause there is no time.
But just beyond the eyes of man there's movement we don't understand
Outside of time.

Drums by Joe Berardi!!!

No Time

Recorded 6/22-23/2012

Dancing on a Pin

Creatures, Creatures of the water
Creatures of the forest
Creatures of the softly moving air
Spirits, Spirits of the starlight
Spirits of the moonlight
Spirits walking printless across the shifting sands

Lets take Angels and Dance them on a pin
Lets take animals and roast them on a spit
Lets take everything and turn it into shit
It's the perfect way to say fuck it

Angels, angels of the heavens
Seraphim of vengeance
Angels cast down to the underworld
Forces, forces of Mathmatics
Orbits of the planets
Orbits of the restless spirits trapped inside the flesh

Lets take Angels and Dance them on a pin
Lets take animals and roast them on a spit
Lets take everything and turn it into shit
It's the perfect way to say fuck it


Dancing on a Pin MX 2

Written and Recorded June 14-15 2012

Lightning in a Glass

I had a plan to drive out to the promised land
To wander in the desert sand, to wait until the spacemen came
And took them with me far away And save me from the judgement day

Cause I don't know what I want or if I want what I've got
Contradiction and confusion and addiction are my lot

And I understand the questions that you ask when you're sad
Dilemmas that don't fit your plan

And I'm not sure who you are or if you come from the same star 
Is it a rocket that you're riding or just lightning in a glass
You move so fast and I'm always the last to know where you've been
And where you're going

I had a thought that I would be an astronaut and fuck up just like Major Tom
Or maybe I'll just ride the bomb right down till it hits the ground

Lightning in a Glass MX 2

Written and recorded 7/1-2/12

Wait

My best friends on the phone tonight we're talking about life 
They don't really like my songs that much but they sure give great advice 
The razor hasn't touched your face in who knows how many days 
And you wander like some kind of ghost around that big empty place

And there's nothing you can do or say to wish the pain away 
Stay on the train and the scenery will change 
Time will pass away just wait

The junkie kids have all cleaned up they're mastering kung fu 
They all think you're a little cracked but man they sure love you 
They say everything works out for the best and I say yeah for who 
All I know is that you rack up debts and pay when they are due

And there's nothing you can do or say to wish the pain away 
Stay on the train and the scenery will change 
And everything that's happening's exactly how it plays 
Time will pass away just wait 
Time will pass away just wait

Wait

Written and Recorded 6/13/12 but finished very very late, so I guess we might say morning of the 14th.

Don't Walk Run Left

Sometimes you wonder what you're missing on the other side
Boys and Girls and new positions that you've never even thought of trying
Somewhere where the grass is greener you'll start another life
With no one looking over your shoulder dragging behind your ball and chain boulder

Sometimes you have to wonder what would happen if you started over
Burn a bridge don't walk run left right north south take a train take a plane disappear into the ozone

Sometimes you just want to take a lighter and burn it to the ground
Take a road you've never taken even if it only goes around and round and round
Somewhere it must be better, maybe there, maybe anywhere but here
It's not too late to change, it's not to late to run away

Don't Walk Run Left

Guitars by Sarahtonin

Job's Robe

Hey, what the hell did I ever do to you God to make you hate me? 
To bring your thunder down on me? 
Wasn't I always your little choirboy? Your little angel? 
Now you're making an example of me. 
I didn't paint you a bearded old white man or claim to know your plans or your will. 
What did I do wrong? 
I'm still trying to be perfect; trying to be amazing; trying to be your man 
Trying not to go crazy. 
Won't you share some of that grace, some of that mercy, some of that hallelujah, some of that light with me? 
Tell me Help me Hold me Show me Lead me Teach me Heal me Free me 
Choose me Use me See me Be me Take me Shake me Burn me Break me 
Steer me Hear me and be near me Lift me Kiss me and be with me 
(make me laugh make me cry make me great let me die 
let me fly let me go let me run let me love let the sun shine on me 
let the river wash me clean...what'd I ever do to you?)

GUITARS BY SARAHTONIN

Job's Robe

Taliban Girl

Taliban Girl Taliban Girl
The flesh is elastic, it stretches and bends
It goes where it has to
But oh what might have been
A square circle of wooden iron
It's a man's world, Taliban Girl

Taliban Girl (updated)

Jade Buddha

Jade Buddha fat saint stone ghoul cancer statue
Leper idol cannibal lotus black zen widow money colored
Maggot mother monkey fucker fungus flower carcass lover

For you brother shoot brother
For you sharp knife grows duller
For you gentle killer
For you greed drives a man insane

Jade Buddha Graven image of blood drenched nirvana
Jade Buddha coffin kitchen worm breeder grave robber
Heart eater child beater soul raper arson savior
Shiva in labor mushroom crater urine bather pope and priest and king of our enslavers

For you a child ages
For you we all miscarry
For you paranoia greed drives a man insane

Jade Buddha karma slasher may the beast be your master
Virgin birth to disaster wife thiever bedroom creeper
Backdoor cheating sneaker feast of fear and corruption
Grief and tears sad eruption well of sorrow with no bottom
Green apple brown and rotten

For you a child ages
For you we all miscarry
For you paranoia greed drives a man insane


Jade Buddha

Party like it's 1999...

Watch out Boy Scout

He was a church going god fearing disciple of the American Dream
Till he woke up one morning and realized he was a queen

Watch out Boy Scout

Do you believe in a black god Do you believe in a white god
Do you believe in a queer god Do you believe in the right god?

Imagine his surprise when he looked in his best friend's eyes
Don't be a tool question their rules everything is out of your control

Watch out Boy Scout

Do you believe in a black god Do you believe in a white god
Do you believe in a queer god Do you believe in the right god? 

Always got up on the right side of bed always kept a little prayer in his head
But now they have told him don't think and don't tell saved him a place in boy scout hell

Watch out Boy Scout

Do you believe in a black god Do you believe in a white god
Do you believe in a queer god Do you believe in the right god? 

Watch out Boy Scout

Boy Scout MX 1

"Everybody's gotta Make their own Mistakes..."

SELF HELPLESS

Madness set in June 9th, 1997 
As foretold by every ex-junkie prophet that I know
And not one missed a chance to say they told me so
But the future is easy to read and the past, well, just watch it bleed
But today remains a mystery

All the local fools call me up down on their luck
And the geniuses down at the Alano club
Want to help me and tell me what to do
But I'd rather be dead than be like you
You say your life went out of control; well I gave up trying so long ago
And I think you're just looking for one more stone to throw, but...

Everybody's gotta make their own mistakes

They say these problems are all in my head
The inevitable results of a life misled
And everybody knows what I should have done instead
But they never seem to have the nad to lie down in my bed
So the losers sock in for another round
And somewhere God's letting someone else down
Let's drink one to another fool who put his faith in someone like you

Everybody's gotta make their own mistakes

Self Helpless

Music and Lyrics by Radiohead
Performed by Paul Roessler

Fake Plastic Trees

Her green plastic watering can for her fake chinese rubber plant
In fake plastic earth
That she bought from a rubber man
In a town full of rubber plans to get rid of itself
It wears her out

She lives with a broken man
A cracked polystyrene man who just crumbles and burns
He used to do surgery for girls in the '80s
But gravity always wins
And it wore him out

She looked like the real thing
She tastes like the real thing
My fake plastic love
But I can't help but feeling I could blow through the ceiling
If I just turn and run
And it wears me out
And if I could be who you wanted all the time....

Fake Plastic Trees MX1


This is the sides...first White, then Black

Unicorns (Part 3 of "The Arc")

The Last Time My Head Was Right

There's a voice inside my head
A little voice that's not my friend
I used to listen to that bullshit
And the remedy was just to tell it to shut up
Haven't you laughed at me enough?

It's a voice that tells me "no."
Tells me what I cannot love.
I can't remember it being right.
And the remedy was just to tell it to shut up
Haven't you laughed at me enough?

The Last Time My Head Was Right

This is the music where the monsters are made...

Towers of Ego (Part 2 of "The Arc")

If you're listening on vinyl, this is the beginning of side 2. The calm before the battle...and then lots and lots of battle...

The Battle (Part 5 of "the Arc")

In which the few remaining humans on earth huddle in the ruins reflecting on their doom

Mansong (the Ever-Opening Newspaper) (Part 4 of "the Arc")

It doesn't matter if you're right
It doesn't matter if you're wrong
It doesn't matter if you have the whole world fooled
Into thinking you're the one
It doesn't matter what you have
It doesn't matter what you've done
It's just a load of ego-driven crap
To make you feel like you're someone.

The only thing that matters is who you helped or hurt today
If you closed your eyes to pain
If you looked or turned away
If you took or if you gave
If you shined a light into the night
Or helped to dig the grave

There was a particle of you in the first drop of rain that fell
That's just scientific law but it really doesn't help
It's just something that we know
That tells us everything is close
But it really doesn't matter all these theories we propose

The only thing that matters is who you helped or hurt today
If you closed your eyes to pain
If you looked or turned away
If you took or if you gave
If you shined a light into the night
Or helped to dig the grave

Acoustic guitars and bass : Cherish Alexander!

The Only Thing That Matters

Jaguar

All these things became possible so we thought they were good
All these things became available so we figured that we should
And a theoretical jaguar stalking the wild
Is not as urgent as my coffee in the morning when I'm tired.

All these things felt so decadent they were so hard to quit
And they were so damn convenient no one really even tripped
And something that's never happened is so hard to predict
Said the turkey to the farmer on the day he was picked

And if it appears like there was no reason or rhyme
Well it all seemed like a good idea at the time

If there's anyone left to be sorry to I extend my regrets
My heart-felt apologies however insufficient
Everyone felt so innocent as they murdered away
They went to the gallows with a smile and a wave

And if you're feeling a little angry and you're wondering "why?"
It all seemed like a good idea at the time

Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time

Christopher Behind the 8-Ball 

When past Panic's stormy capes I sailed into the nether shoals
Lo! Beneath the scrutiny of the sailors long gone down before
"Abandon ship! Abandon ship!" they cried to me "All hope is lost!" 

On, sail on, have faith the world is round
And no one here will be there to care if it should prove that I am wrong

The Tropic of Delirium seagulls sing and mermaids strum
A symphony of seashell strings, crystal gin and pirate rum
I almost wound up on the rocks but spied in time the drunken sun

The sea becalmed like a looking glass; playing craps we sat still fast
And mumbly-peg with the Captain's leg. Man he looks like a fillet!
I think we might be sorry yet boys, everyone place your last bets...

Christopher Behind The 8 - Ball

Too Much Good Thing

Well the separate paths they lay at your feet
The frozen waste and the tropical heat
And the unfriendly cats they spit at the moon
They howl at the cars and then sleep until noon
And like a good thing that becomes too much
You love it you want it but you'd better not touch
Traffic jam inside of you
A railroad track through your living room
The morning rush will be hitting soon
And I've got to catch a train

Now I stand on my lawn waiting for dawn
With my hose in my hand I water the land
And my neighbor the cop his insurance is up
He's drinking from his uninsured cup.

Too Much Good Thing

Too Hollywood

Hey James Dean don't you know it's all a dream?
It's all cake and ice cream, it's only Hollywood
Hey Clara Bow jumping out everyone's window
Didn't she know it's only Hollywood?
It's just so Hollywood

And for everyone who writes his name across the sky
There's a million more like you and I
Dreamers and wandering drunks
Who never seem to amount to much

Hey little tramp who's your fourteen year old queen
Looks like Babylon to me fast asleep in your black Limousine
It's all so Hollywood. So very Hollywood.

And for everyone who writes his name across the sky
There's a million more like you and I
Dreamers and besotted drunks who never seem to amount to much
Neverwas and Used to Be play out tiny tragedies
And microscopic victories down in Hollywood
It's too too Hollywood.
It's so very Hollywood.

From the sort of imaginary album "Raped X God" part 2 of "the Drug Years"

Too Hollywood

Amnesty
It serves a lot of people well to lock a lot of other people up in jails.
But just remember that we planned when we came to the new land
To leave behind the medieval past.
For thousands of years we climbed up out of hunt or be hunted
Kill or be killed, run and hide or die but maybe we've changed. 
Maybe we're something that we've never been before.
And we can be free to walk under the sun and decide what we need
And be kind.
Maybe we don't need rulers anymore 
And we don't want to be told what to buy 
And we don't have to kill to survive
And maybe there's hope and maybe dreams are still alive somewhere
And when we lock someone in a prison yard
A little part of us becomes a prison guard
And when we strap someone in an electric chair
A little part of us dies with him there.

Amnesty

Psychosomatic

A million and one aches and pains all starting in a sick corner of your brain
All your sorrows and your fear your disappointments your anger and your tears
Take all the medicine that you want it won't help you with what you've got
You ask the doctor what do you expect him to say
Whataya wanna hear an how much ya got ta pay

It's all in your head everything is Psychosomatic
Psycho psycho psychosomatic there's nothing wrong with you

You've never been sick a day in your life unless it got you out of something
Take good care of yourself watch what you eat get plenty of sleep I don't do any of these things
Now take this bad thought stab it in your breast it'll be real it'll be the best excuse you could have
There's no exception to the rule everything you catch think say or do

It's all in your head everything is Psychosomatic
Psycho psycho psychosomatic there's nothing wrong with you

I'm gonna give you the cure better be sure here comes your pill catch it
Heal yourself no one else can
there are no germs or worms there's just bad turns lessons learned and last stands

It's all in your head everything is Psychosomatic
Psycho psycho psychosomatic there's nothing wrong with you

From "Raped X God" the second part of the four CD boxed set "the Drug Years"

Psychosomatic

They

They shook them free your girlish chains
Like black clouds drop their sheets of rain
They woke up one day free
To become something that was yet to be

And it hurt so fucking bad
Until it was just something that they had killed 
A cold absence of migraine flashes
Celebrating glasses of champagne spilled

And now I can go walk underneath the canopy
Listen to the grass as it grows up over me
Cuz people like you will do it better than me

They saw the limits of our creations
They saw the borders of the bankrupt nations
Walls and horizons that would trap a soul in amber
Until they smashed the tyrant and abandoned her

They set the churches to crack and rust
And left us all just gasping in the dust
Dancing lightly over rainbow oceans
Coloring the sky new with their angel paint brushes

And now I can go walk underneath the canopy
Listen to the grass as it grows up over me
Cuz people like you will do it better than me

They

Heaventree
Music by Chain Rochester Words by Paul Roessler (apologies to J.Joyce)

The heaventree of stars hung with humid nightblue fruit
And the daybreak that we are swirling twirling through the loop
I have rung the bells of heaven I have breathed the battered rose
Touch me soft eyes soft soft hands I'm lonely touch me touch me soon

And I fear those big words that make us so unhappy
And I fear those big words that make us so unhappy

Darkness came and darkness blazed away and I stayed a man in a room
Nothing changed and nothing stayed the same and it all will fade away soon
 
The sparklelighted cubed horizon nestled in the palms
And the ravens bicker bitter with themselves up on the walls
And one psychopath's in prison and another rules the world
Take me far away take me away back right where I belong

And I've cast every thought away that made me so unhappy
Yeah I've cast every thought away that made me so unhappy

Darkness came and darkness blazed away and I stayed a man in a room
Nothing changed and nothing stayed the same and a cow jumped over the moon

Paul Roessler

Pinned to spotlight

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