"Don't tell me that you're sorry when you were never there for me"

halfway to 10k already...once we get there, this song might go on spotify and i also might see if promoting sounds would like to promote my song 😁

{part 1}
yeah we threw it all away at a record pace
years of building broken down in just a couple days
i’m zoning out and going numb up in the face
crying
begging me to change
but you know it goes both ways
losing everything is something i can’t take
smoking cookie tryna ease some of the pain
looking for an appetite i ain’t eaten in days
i’m fighting with my brain
you can see it in my face

codependent
self aware but i still hate myself til it’s embedded 
i sit alone i’m really cold
cause i don’t know where i should go
and it’s getting old

still i never hate you
if you need i’m here
the bond with someone else i don’t think it could compare
but i don’t think i can save you
i’m broken
it’s not fair
i could make you feel safe
running fingers through your hair
i know the way it feels to feel like nobody cares
and every time i think about it i feel guilty like it’s only me
i like to facetime when i fall asleep
so i know that you’re alive when you’re not next to me

i sit alone i’m really cold
cause i don’t know where i should go
and it’s getting old
leave a message at the tone
cause i’m all alone
soon as i walk out that door
i'm never coming home

{interlude}
you say that you hate me 
but i know you're lying
said you don't need me
but i see you crying
it happened so fast
throwing it all away
now that i've left
you don't know what to say

{part 2}
second chances aren’t the same when you bend the meaning
every chance another scar that formed with no bleeding
tensions always getting higher we both getting heated
if you love me better tell me cause i fucking need it
we hurt each other saw it coming from the start
i wish that it was easy but it’s really fucking hard
i feel your energy beside me when i’m looking at the stars
just two people living equal with another broken heart

codependent
self aware but i still hate myself til it’s embedded 
i sit alone i’m really cold
cause i don’t know where i should go
and it’s getting old

still i never hate you
if you need i’m here
the bond with someone else i don’t think it could compare
but i don’t think i can save you
i’m broken
it’s not fair
i could make you feel safe
running fingers through your hair
i know the way it feels to feel like nobody cares
and every time i think about it i feel guilty like it’s only me
i like to facetime when i fall asleep
so i know that you’re alive when you’re not next to me

i sit alone i’m really cold
cause i don’t know where i should go
and it’s getting old
leave a message at the tone
cause i’m all alone
soon as i walk out that door
i'm never coming home

nch

produced by 4lexf https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCiYzQlIUDoklHxtRC2Q6_OQ

written, performed, engineered by cavasoul

nch (prod. 4lexf)

i get no sleep
i'm chasing dreams while i'm in agony
my face is numb 
my head is bruised for something sensory
lay down defences 
fall fatigued only a moment away
all i need is for you to stay

agony w/ lyrah & splashgvng

- Official song is out on Promoting Sounds

@TheMarkerFlipper x @Rxseboy - heart is bleeding (prod. heroe & the bootleg boy)

something simple | feat. mishaal (prod. apes prod)

Anyone waiting to hear my voice/rap can finally hear it :)

Telling the story of a kid living in a rough household, not personal, but something many can relate to. Enjoy :)

Written by jxsie beats & Lxst Boy
Produced by jxsie beats

LYRICS:

jxsie:
I woke up feeling so dizzy with a flower in my hand
Stood straight up tall then it hit me
I always think that I can
But all the bones in my body been shrinkin' down recently
And all the weight on my shoulders is getting down to my knees
I think it's time to let go because I dont feel alive
While papa stares at me vaguely oh God I just wanna cry
Cuz I dont eat that much food and when he asks me "oh, why?"
I dont give him an answer no I just stare in his eyes
The days they only get longer and God it's just getting old
So soon my story will be somewhere and will only be told
(yeah)
I hope you cry
And I'm so sorry, mom and dad that I say that
But I really wanna die
The pain is settin' in the sedatives ain't helping and it's eating me alive

Lxst Boy:
I just wanna be the man that you want me to be
I wont tell you what I'm fighting but I talk in my sleep
And if you'd listen then maybe (you'd) know much more about me
I make sad music spell my name like L-X-S-T
And my
Day dreams are spiralin' into nightmares (uh)
Fight the demons they dont fight fair (huh)
It gets harder every night
I swear I'm fallin' to pieces
Pray to God that I find
I'm showing all my credits 
All my dreams are in the septic 
All those hours being restless is going towards cleaning messes that
Aren't even mine
And yet you take up my time
And then you act like it's fine
But it's not really fine
You should've been more supportive yeah that would've been right
But you dont even ask if my day was alright (yeah)
I find solace with the sedatives  
The voices in my head get repetitive
I never respond to my messages (huh) 
Yeah it's got me down like pessimist 
When I run away please just read what this letter says

I am really hoping you guys enjoy this one, I put quite a bit of effort into it with the vocals and the production. First song with me rapping is OUT!!

a letter to my parents (feat. Lxst Boy)

written by Lxst Boy, cd., & Ayleen Valentine
produced by Boyfifty
mixed and mastered by Lxst Boy

official version out now on all platforms <3

-lyrics-
(Hook: Ayleen Valentine)
I'm sorry that I let you down
it's probably cause I sleep too much
and every time that you're around
there's always something wrong

(Verse 1: Lxst Boy)
late nights and talks with my conscience
lately i been feeling nauseous
I write songs so call me off topic
lowkey wanna tell them to stop it
I'll just get walked on
I'm feeling that way like non-stop
I'm sorry I'm an outcast wait no I'm not
but I let you down whenever I talk
I'm feeling like a 9tails knockoff
I came from the sewers then the time stopped
im running around in circles in my thoughts
the clock winding down, hear the tick tock
when I'm locked in my room
I'm feeling the tension
record at my desk
these lyrics unscripted
writing these songs
that you'll never listen
cause you never cared
I'm a solo mission woah
uh I wanna talk
without feeling guilty
I need a shower
you making me filthy
blood stains the wall
you know that you killed me
its cold in my room
and at night it gets chilly
I wanna talk
but every time I do my heartstrings in a knot
in getting tired of writing these songs
and day by day 
you wouldn't tell me what's wrong
yeah

(Hook: Ayleen Valentine)
 
(Verse 2: cd.)
yeah
We going in circles and circles 
I'm stuck in this stage in my life
I can't make it over these hurdles
I always let go of my kite, yeah
Sleep after school, hating these people
Run like a fool, and then repeat it
Lonely in this universe, not like steven
I'm not cool, i'm just stuck in my feelings
You were the one that i thought
But you were gone the next day
The day that we fought
sucked at shooting my shots
Time is ticking the clock
huh?
Going through these stages yeah
Going through these phases uh
Ain't no one gonna help me
Oh man i need saving
(please help me)

(Hook: Ayleen Valentine)

Let you down (Original Version) w/ cd. [Boyfifty x Ayleen Valentine]

Perspective (prod. moon)

Written by: Thomas Reid & Fog Lake
Produced by: boyfifty

Discover Thomas Reid:
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/0dcxj82ddksd6tDDcJgbqo?si=-O1Ii6RgTaKCD8_BdvoQvQ&dl_branch=1
Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/thomasreidmusic
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thomasreidmusic/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/thomasreidmusic

Lyrics:
we were always miserable together
riled up and underneath the weather

i been running away for so long
got everybody asking me where i’m from
i couldn’t even tell you
tell you
i got nowhere to go now

and i been running away from myself
got everybody saying that i need help
i couldn’t even tell you
tell you
cause i know you’d just run out

and i got no one
no one
nobody left to talk to
it’s no fun
i wonder where highway
might lead
if i just started driving

and i got no one
no one
nobody ever calls now
they moved on
i wonder if i’m breathing
maybe not
if no one can see me
no one can see me

we were always miserable together
(together, together forever)
riled up and underneath the weather

i been running away for so long
my lungs are curled up and i’m slowing down
i wish that i could tell you
tell you
i’m too tired to move now

and i been running away from the past
the finish line’s empty when you’re in last
i wish that i could tell you
tell you
but i know i’d just run out

and i got no one
no one
nobody ever calls now
they moved on
i wonder if i’m breathing
maybe not
if no one can see me
no one can see me

running down your face and on your sweater
something I've been thinking for forever

no one can see me (prod. boyfifty)

(Cover by WOMBO]
little something i wrote in 5 minutes lol
enjoy <3
lyrics:
[Verse 1]
yeah, don't tell me that ur sorry when you were never there for me, don't tell me that ur sorry when you didn't notice me, never give apologies if you don't care about me, don't even hit up my phone if ur just gonna ghost me, just leave me be, stop trying to be friendly when all u are is mean, im just a lonely teen, writing sad songs behind a screen, quit acting tough or i'll pull out the beam, yeah.

[Verse 2]
yeah, im just a lonely teen, writing sad songs behind a screen, i wish i didn't have to rely on caffeine, i just miss the days when u were my queen, now im gonna end it all and overdose on codeine, yeah, im broken like a machine, started neglecting my health, im no longer clean, i am only 14 but i'll smoke up all of this green, all of ur words sting me like a vaccine.

Sorry [Prod. JUST A KID]

shadows / w soku [prod.4lexf] - Remake

what a wasteful attempt of a human being (eric godlow)

I am my own pain 💔
14
single
Baptized Christian 2021 🙏 
proud Mexican-American 🇲🇽 🇺🇸

Collabs/Features are free
 contact information:
Discord: BoyInAHoodie#5622
Xbox: W0LF#1255    
more contacts at bottom bio
       

 
                                                                                                                                                                                           
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Member of Loners Cafe Collective <3

Jesus Saves, and He Loves You❤🙏

Sorry [Prod. JUST A KID]

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