I just discovered this song today. I enjoyed the words, bit didn't know the tune. I was happy to find it here on SoundCloud. I was really touched with your testimony, as I struggle in my situation similarly. love Mark 9 also. Thank you! PTL

I recorded an instrumental version of the same hymn two years ago when a sister taught it to me. Now, I had the feeling to record it again, after all the experiences the Lord has given this year.

I really enjoyed the third stanza of this hymn:
"Just rest, He knows;
With Him blindness is pleasant!
Just rest, He knows;
Sightless, you see Him best!
Just rest, He knows;
My soul, don’t waste the present
On those “what-if’s“.
Just turn to Him and rest!"

After almost two years of the pandemic, I felt hopeful entering into 2022, thinking that perhaps it held better hopes for more freedom and a sense of normality that we knew before everything came "crashing down".

However, in January, COVID hit our household to such an extent that I didn't see coming. I even came to a point of thinking that maybe I'll lose a family member to this virus--spending days at the hospital with a seeming plethora of medication just to get better. It was such a grueling time, a battle in my mind, a severe weakening of my faith, and I thought it was the end for me; I was in fight mode, endeavoring for survival against all the aspects of depression. I forgot my spirit. I didn't think it would help. "I just needed to get things done," I said to myself.

Everyone recovered eventually, thank the Lord. But my mind remained traumatized. The scenes kept coming back, and I dreaded every time night came because the eerie silence reminded me of the calm before the storm. For months on end, I would lay in bed 'til the wee hours of the morning--unable to sleep--paralyzed with the fear of extreme possibilities. My mind was filled with SOOOO MANY "what if's": What if it happens again? What if I can't cope? What if there won't be enough supply to meet the need?

These thoughts occupied my mind endlessly. I felt like my spirit was so powerless against my raging mind, which triggered my emotions, and caused my body to suffer the consequences as well. The sightlessness drove me to my wit's end. I think, deep in my heart, I was angry at the Lord for giving me such a heavy burden again. I was complaining, "Why does this keep happening to me?!" I had no rest in my tripartite being. But one message struck me concerning "God's Economy in Faith" during a working ones' conference.

It posed a question: "Do you believe that He (God) is repeating all the things He did in the past? No. He is not repeating anything. He is always moving forward." But what about you? Are you stuck in the past? Are you a person of yesterday?

I was indeed severely hindered by the past. I couldn't move on. The events of the past fueled an increasing amount of unbelief. What a shameful situation I was in. Every day, I felt like I was drowning, like Peter started sinking when he looked at the waves. I couldn't help it. The waves were so huge, ones I've never encountered in such magnitude.

Rest comes when we look at the Lord, and it seems I still haven't been perfected in this aspect especially when it concerns family--family is such a blind side for me. Everything else just fades, even my spirit, when it boils down to this.

In the end, I'm thankful to the Lord for exposing me of my shortage in this matter. I thought I was okay...I wasn't. But I acknowledge that I am still in the process, and I thank the Lord and all the saints for really carrying us in prayer. It was way beyond my capacity; I despaired of living. 

One last thing. The brother mentioned such an encouraging word.
"What should we do if we recognize unbelief?
We say, "I BELIEVE!"
"LORD, HELP MY UNBELIEF!"

This brings us to the chorus of the hymn:
"Thank and praise You, Jesus!
Through all unknowns,
You make Yourself so dear!"

I still love You, Lord. You are dearer than before!

(Link to full lyrics: https://www.hymnal.net/en/hymn/ns/34)

Fear Not, He Knows (NS34)

Hymn 324. Far away the noise...-Ohio-Himno 156-Desde lejos oigo de las luchas y afanes!!-🌺🎻🌹🎶

Just As I Am

1
This narrow path now leading us,
Path to life—a glorious choice for us.
On all sides constricted are we;
Let us not be disheartened.
 
Remain in Christ to stay in life;
Abide in Him as the Vine,
Drop our self and lay all aside
In walking the pathway of life.

2
If one day storms beset our way,
Will we then be shaken, fall away?
Our only Hope now lives in us;
Trusting in His flow we stay.

3
While we’re yearning, waiting for Him,
Let’s seize today by enjoying Him,
Letting Christ make home within us—
Our portion, life and glory.

Remain in Christ To Stay In Life (NS924)

Revelation 3:20-21

a poem about summer coming to an end, the naive and cyclic wish to be somebody else, trying to reach for the right fruit before it rots

Still Life

Christ is the unique foundation - no one else can lay
Upon our Jesus Christ the church is being built up today
Nat'ral, fallen, earthen - needs to be burned away
All our work will be revealed that day

When we serve we need to learn to have a single heart
Listen to His speaking - pure intents to us impart
No other ambition but to please the King of kings
Though it may involve some sufferings

Build more of Yourself in us, Lord
Grant us more experience, word
Nothing that we have and can do will ever please You
All dross unfit for Your building
Burn, Lord, everything
Increase more in us, refine
Everything in us divine

Infuse, guide us with Your gaze
Intensify, set us ablaze!
We'd like to give You the first place
First love all our days
To work with You in Your vineyard
Would be our reward
For there we would give to You our love

We minister life, serve Christ - this is for His building
Saints built up as one body - Christ riches expressing
And then we see Christ have His house, His habitation
Have His rest, have His satisfaction

Build more of Yourself in us, Lord
Grant us more experience, word
Nothing that we have and can do will ever please You
All dross unfit for Your building
Burn, Lord, everything
Increase more in us, refine
Everything in us divine

Infuse, guide us with Your gaze
Intensify, set us ablaze!
We'd like to give You the first place
First love all our days
To work with You in Your vineyard
Would be our reward
For there we would give to You our love

Deal with each peculiarity, individuality
Infuse Your love in us to knit us and build us
Renew and transform, mold us to Your death conform
Live a life fully for Your economy

Infuse, guide us with Your gaze
Intensify, set us ablaze!
We'd like to give You the first place
First love all our days
To work with You in Your vineyard
Would be our reward
For there we would give to You our love
For there we would give to You our love

To listen in YouTube, click on link:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=utbyWrkIHHk

Constitution 4

Infuse, Guide Us

SSOT2015

Choose to be an overcomer

1. Lovers of Christ in His ascension—
Enjoy the riches of His life.
She becomes His private garden
With its fountain, fruit, and spice.
Christ is hers and she is Christ’s dear love.

2. She is as beautiful as Tirzah
As lovely as Jerusalem.
Through her living in Christ’s ascension
Her dear heart is now His home.
She’s become the sanctuary of God.

3. Who is this woman I am seeing?
Shining forth as the moon and sun.
She is absolutely heavenly,
From the old creation free;
Overcoming all to live within the veil.

4. An army terrible with banners
Christ’s lovers overcome to be.
Those attracted by His beauty,
Fully trusting in His power.
Her romance is now the dances of two camps.

5. The Shulamite, His duplication,
His counterpart has now become.
She’s the same in life and nature,
His expression to the full;
Consummated as the New Jerusalem.

Lovers Of Christ In His Ascension

1. What about my sinful past?
And my conscience has no rest.
Deep within I feel the pain.
I’m condemned from all my guilty stains.

2. O my life of misery,
In this world of vanity,
As I searched for happiness,
My reward I received just emptiness.

3. God was far away from me,
Great and highest One is He.
Yet You took on humanity.
You came for me,
Hung on a tree,
Bled there to die for me.
 	
4. That’s why I love Him.
That’s why I treasure Him.
That’s why I give my life and all to Him.
That’s why I love Him.
That’s why I treasure Him.
That’s why I give my life and all to Him.

That's Why I Love Him

Christ is the title deed of all that God is! Just call!

Fear Not, He Knows (NS34)

Psalming unto Him

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