THIS IS THE OPENING OF THE SHOW. At lights out, the audience hears the clanging of a church bell and a tight spotlight comes up on a young girl singing in the far corner of the stage. We are in the psyche ward of a hospital and this girl is a patient. Other patients soon appear, lost in their own world of mental anguish, expressing themselves through individualized dialogue. This builds into the opening dance number after which come the vocals, which express the inner feelings of all these patients—i.e., their desire to heal even as they know something is wrong with them. Carly, the lead character, eventually emerges from out of this ensemble. She has been there for several weeks undergoing therapy/counseling for what everyone thinks was a failed suicide attempt. She, too, sings about her feelings throughout the song. She is troubled, yes, but actually did NOT attempt suicide. (We learn this later in the show). As the song is ending, all of the patients begin retreating back to their rooms (exiting offstage), while Carly walks out from among them. She is now in street clothes because she is being released. The next scene begins outside, where her father is arriving to pick her up.

𝐋𝐘𝐑𝐈𝐂𝐒 - "𝐈 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐍𝐀 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐋"

𝐄𝐍𝐒𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐋𝐄:
Would you hold on to me if I was hanging on a cliff? 
If I was just tethered by a thread? If I was almost dead? 
Nobody hears. Shouldn’t somebody, somewhere, 
See these tears, Behind my eyes, 
In the lies I tell you, And tell myself?

𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐘:
Every day and every night, so afraid I lie awake.
Take me away from all the choices; from all the voices in my head.

𝐄𝐍𝐒𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐋𝐄:
They call me insane. But I don’t know where that is in my brain.
Am I insane?

𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐘:
Will I get better, but lose myself?

𝐄𝐍𝐒𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐋𝐄:
I live my life more lost than I know. Where did all my hopes and dreams go?
I still feel. And I wanna heal.I wanna heal.
I look around at my world breaking. No more chances left worth taking.
I still feel. And I wanna heal. I wanna heal.

Just another disease that no one ever planned.
And when some day a cure they find. They'll give me back my mind.
Help me. I'm dyin'. I'm so tired of tryin' to still fight.

𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐘:
It isn't right. I never wanted this.

𝐄𝐍𝐒𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐋𝐄 & 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐘:
But here I am.

𝐄𝐍𝐒𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐋𝐄:
See my nails the skin is tearing. Hear my pain. My soul is swearing.
I still feel. And I wanna heal. I wanna heal.
Hate me. Hit me. Mock me. Pill me. 
Wreck me. Rape me. Shock me. Kill me. 
I still feel. And I wanna heal. I wanna heal.

Take me away. Take me far away.
Far away from myself.
From my misery. From my agony.
From what I've become.
I just wanna be someone else.

I gotta fight to make it. I gotta win.
I gotta fight, I can take it. I can't give in.
I gotta fight. I gotta fight. I gotta fight.

I need a little time; a little time to get better.
I know and I believe I won't be here forever.

I wanna be someone else.

Life Happens

I Wanna Heal

This is the second number in my new musical titled Life Happens. The song takes place following first scene (see "I Wanna Heal") in which we saw Harland picking up his daughter at the psychiatric hospital on the day of her release. They have a brief, but somewhat tense, conversation that eventually ends when Carly says she is starving and needs to get something to eat. Harland says he knows of a great Mexican place on Pacific Coast Highway where decades earlier he and Carly's mother used to go when they were young. 

As Harland and Carly exit, their play off music is actually the introduction to "The Dancing Jalapeno." This begins Scene 2, which takes place at a local outdoor by-the-side-of-road local joint called The Dancing Jalapeno. It's a fun ensemble number, featuring a Mexican-inspired dance in the middle of the song. (The ensemble are the restaurant servers and customers.) Carly and her father enter the restaurant after the song ends and begin their dialogue at a table over lunch.

My inspiration for this song came from two sources: (1) an actual outdoor Mexican food cafe/stand where I used to eat in California, by the side of the road, just of Pacific Coast Highway. They had this HUGE JAR of Jalapenos near the order pick up window. (2) the Mexican music I used to hear my Mexican grandfather (mother's father) sing when I was a kid.

𝐋𝐘𝐑𝐈𝐂𝐒 - "𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐃𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐉𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐨"

𝐄𝐍𝐒𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐋𝐄 :
Welcome to all, familia y compadres. Hola! Buenos días!  
We’re so glad you came around to see us.
Sit down. relax. Ignore the messy mesas. 
Feel the ocean breezes blowing. Time to get this party going.

At The Dancing Jalapeño (The Dancing Jalapeño). 
The hottest spot north of (north of), north of (north of), north of the border.

Carne Asada, pollo, Y carnitas. 
Homemade guacamole,  Chips and salsa, for a dollar only.
Tortilla, tamales, tacos, y taquitos. 
Everything is made to order. Add dessert for just a quarter.

At The Dancing Jalapeño (The Dancing Jalapeño). 
The hottest spot north of (north of), north of (north of), north of the border.

You pick the meat to slice. 
We add the beans, and cheese, and rice. 
Then we throw a few tomatoes on. 
Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha.  
So, you can hear it sizzle.

We cover everything with lime. 
Squeeze each drop out every time. 
That’s all we ever need to do. 
Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha. 
To make our food amazing.

The ingredients are all the same, 
With just a different look and different name, 
But no one seems to care, or even notice.

[The ensemble breaks into a rousing Mexican dance]

Dine in, take out. 
No matter where you're feasting. 
Lick your fingers if you gotta. 
And feel free to lick your plata.
All day, all night.
Celebrations with sangria. 
While Happy Hour margaritas match señors with señoritas.

At The Dancing Jalapeño (The Dancing Jalapeño). 
The hottest spot north of (north of), north of (north of), 
North of, north of, north of . . . the border.

The Dancing Jalepeño

"Stop" is the third song in ACT I of my new musical "Life Happens." It is a very intense confrontational song between Carly and her alcoholic mother, Kathleen. The number takes place in Scene 3 when Carly returns home and begins immediately packing to leave California for Chicago, where she will begin living for a while with her father, Harland. This news infuriates Kathleen, who is unwilling to accept not only Carly's decision to leave, but Carly's complaints about how Kathleen has always treated her. It's a very bad relationship because of Kathleen's alcoholism, which started soon after Harland left the marriage, when Carly was still a little girl. Kathleen has abused Carly for years, mostly verbally/emotionally/psychologically, but also sometimes even physically. It's a very harsh/edgy song that lays out the kind of dynamic and pain felt by both women over the course of their relationship. Throughout the song, Kathleen is drunk.

𝐋𝐘𝐑𝐈𝐂𝐒 - "𝐒𝐭𝐨𝐩"

𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐘:
STOP PRETENDING
YOU’RE THE ONLY ONE WHO BLEEDS, MOTHER. 
THAT ALL YOUR NEEDS MORE IMPORTANT THAN MINE,
MORE IMPORTANT THAN ANYONE ELSE’S.
STOP PRETENDING THAT YOU CARE.
‘CAUSE YOU DON’T REALLY CARE FOR ME. NO.
YOU DON’T CARE FOR ME. (K: YOU DON’T CARE FOR ME)
 
𝐊𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐋𝐄𝐄𝐍:
STOP COMPLAINING. 
‘CAUSE YOU DON’T KNOW THE PAIN I FEEL.
CAN’T SEE WHAT’S REAL BEYOND 
THE LITTLE WORLD THAT YOU LIVE IN.
ONLY SEE WHAT YOU WANT TO SEE.
STOP PRETENDING THAT YOU CARE.
‘CAUSE YOU DON’T REALLY CARE FOR ME. NO 
YOU DON’T CARE FOR ME. (C: YOU DON’T CARE FOR ME)

𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐘:
EVERYTHING YOU SAY TO ME
IS JUST ANOTHER LIE
EVERYTHING YOU DID TO ME
BECAME A PART OF ME.

𝐊𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐋𝐄𝐄𝐍:
DON'T PREACH TO ME
DON'T LECTURE ME
I GAVE MY LIFE AWAY FOR YOU

𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐘 / 𝐊𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐋𝐄𝐄𝐍:
I CAN'T JUST LEAVE THE PAST BEHIND
EVERY TEAR,
ALL THE FEAR,
YEAR AFTER YEAR,
I NEVER WILL FORGET
SO, PLEASE, JUST. . .

STOP EXPLAINING WHY YOUR WORLD
IS ALWAYS SOMEHOW FALLING APART, 
WHY ALL THE MIND-GAMES YOU PLAY EVERYDAY ARE JUSTIFIED,
WHY ALL YOUR PROBLEMS ARE ALWAYS BECAUSE ME.
STOP PRETENDING THAT YOU CARE.
‘CAUSE YOU DON’T REALLY CARE FOR ME. NO.
YOU DON’T CARE FOR ME. YOU DON’T CARE FOR ME.

STOP PRETENDING. STOP PRETENDING. 
STOP PRETENDING. STOP PRETENDING. 
STOP PRETENDING, PLEASE. ‘CAUSE YOU DON’T LOVE ME.

Stop

This is the 4th number in my new musical, Life Happens. It is a tender, romantic, love song duet sung by Carly's father (Harland) and his live-in love (Beryl). Both Harland and Beryl are in their mid-late 40s and found each other late in life, but are very much in love and happy. The song happens after Harland and Carly have arrived in Chicago, where Carly is going to now be living for a while with her father so she can sort of re-group and emotionally/mentally recover (and relax) after being released from the hospital. This turn of events, of course, will be a disruption to the life/plans of Harland & Beryl. The song starts as Harland begins apologizing to Beryl for how he has basically upended all of their plans for the near future. But Beryl reassures Harland, telling him that she understands and that it is thru such events that people learn "what love is." It is a song in which both Harland & Beryl affirm their love to each other.

 Both Harland and Beryl are in their mid-late 40s and found each other late in life, but are very much in love and happy. The song happens after Harland and Carly have arrived in Chicago, where Carly is going to now be living for a while with her father so she can sort of re-group and emotionally/mentally recover (and relax) after being released from the hospital. This turn of events, of course, will be a disruption to the life/plans of Harland & Beryl. The song starts as Harland begins apologizing to Beryl for how he has basically upended all of their plans for the near future. But Beryl reassures Harland, telling him that she understands and that it is thru such events that people learn "what love is." It is a song in which both Harland & Beryl affirm their love to each other.

𝐋𝐘𝐑𝐈𝐂𝐒 - "𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐈𝐬"

𝐁𝐄𝐑𝐘𝐋:
YOU DON’T HAVE TO SAY TO ME YOU’RE SORRY.
YOU DON’T HAVE TO WORRY. I’M NOT ANGRY WITH YOU.
I UNDERSTAND THAT LIFE CAN SOMETIMES 
TAKE AN UNEXPECTED TURN. 
BUT THAT’S HOW WE LEARN WHAT LOVE IS.

𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐃:
YOU ALWAYS SEEM TO UNDERSTAND
SO MUCH MORE THAN ME.
LIKE WHEN YOU SEE THE GOOD IN THINGS
THAT NO ONE ELSE CAN SEE.
I’M JUST A MAN, WHO OFTEN
DOESN’T KNOW QUITE WHAT TO DO.
BUT I’LL LEARN FROM YOU WHAT LOVE IS.

𝐁𝐄𝐑𝐘𝐋:
I DON’T NEED FOR YOU TO BE A MODERN MOVIE ROMEO.

𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐃:
I DON’T NEED MAGAZINE LOOKS OR EXOTIC BEAUTY.

𝐁𝐄𝐑𝐘𝐋/𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐃:
IF YOU’RE NOT PERFECT, THAT’S FINE WITH ME.
I JUST WANT SOMEONE LIKE YOU,
WHO KNOWS ME, AND WANTS ME, AND NEEDS ME.
SOMEONE I CAN TALK TO.

𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐃:
YOU’LL NEVER HAVE TO WONDER
IF YOU’RE THE ONE FOR ME.

𝐁𝐄𝐑𝐘𝐋:
YOU’LL NEVER HAVE A REASON
TO FEEL THE SLIGHTEST HINT OF JEALOUSY 

𝐁𝐄𝐑𝐘𝐋/𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐃:
I UNDERSTAND THE ROAD WE’RE ON
IS PAVED WITH JOYS AND TEARS.

𝐁𝐄𝐑𝐘𝐋: BUT THROUGH ALL THE YEARS 
            𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐃: THROUGH ALL THE YEARS

𝐁𝐄𝐑𝐘𝐋: WE’LL FIND OUR WAY 
            𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐃:WE’LL FIND OUR WAY

𝐁𝐄𝐑𝐘𝐋/𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐃:
 AND LEARN WHAT LOVE IS.

What Love Is

Richard Abanes is an artist of many talents: singer; actor; dancer; painter; playwright; photographer; musician; composer; lyricist.

Stop

Richie Abanes

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