Feat. Charles Bukowski in an interview on his novel 'Women' 

Lyrics: 

Hey babe
I fucked up
I guess that 'One last time'
wasn't enough
"Angel, please pick me up"
she said "Your soul ain't worth that much!"
"But I think I lov-"
She cut me off, said she'd heard enough
She cut me off, said she'd heard enough  

I'm looking for the light
but this tunnel just seems so long
no sense of self-direction 
can't tell right 
from wrong 
right from fucking wrong 
and I see 
the error of my ways
I should have spent more of my days
working on myself 
instead of being sat indoors 
playing video games 
 - I'm not Lana Del Rey!
But I wanna escape 
ain't that the way? 

Hey Babe,
I fucked up 
and I know that sorry's never gonna be enough
but if you can "Find it in your heart 
to let me back into your arms."
She said "No way, mate! You only talk about body parts, 
all your songs are about body parts."

I'm looking for the light
but this tunnel just seems so long
no sense of self-direction 
can't tell right 
from wrong 
right from fucking wrong 
and I see 
the error of my ways
I should have spent more of my days
working on myself 
instead of being sat indoors 
playing video games. 
But ain't that the way?     
You just wanna escape. 
- I'm still not Lana Del Rey.

© Ray Gunn Matthews 2021

Girls

Hey Babe, take a walk on the mild side

Feat. sample of 'Mr. Awesome! - Roy Shildt' (OG Gamer/Pick-up-artist piece of trash)
and a sample by simp-loving E-girl nekolul 

Lyrics: 

Here's a song about a girl I met in a bar, who was dressed head-to-toe in Leopard print. It's called 'Leopard Printcess' - like what I did there? 

Hey Leopard Princess, you intimidate me - 
You've got that whole 'empowered woman from the 80s' thing going on 
and I think that your eyes would make me curl up an die. 
Are those shoulder pads, or are you just angry 
at me? 
'Cos I didn't just think it, I said it. 
She came walzing over and she got in close and she said in my ear 

"Hey come on, boy 
show you're man
enough 
to get with this feminist 
a scaredy-cat never gets good pussy 
treat me with respect
put away your money." 

So we bought eachother a drink went back to her place, but we didn't even get there we just ended up having sex in the garden and at the end she said: 

"See, even feminists want to get fucked in the dirt 
sometimes
and get treated like they are worse 
sometimes they look for guys 
that have shirts that say
'I'm not Mr. Right 
but I'll fuck you until he arrives' 
- All night."

So come on, boys 
show you're man
enough 
to be with a feminist 
'Cos scaredy-cats never get good pussy 
treat them with respect, put away your money 
'Cos a good woman can't be bought. 

-----
[Some things I've learned and thought about since writing this song - not all feminists are good and worth supporting - T.E.R.Fs disgust me. Of course money can buy a good woman - Sex Work is Real Work.
This is very obviously a make-believe story in the guise of a rock song to try and stop people expecting all feminists to be a certain way.] 
-----  
© Ray Gunn Matthews 2021

Leopard Printcess

Lyrics:

Another 3am phone call
oh, what you trying to prove?
The next time there is drama, girl,
before the night is through -
Go home and sleep on it, wait until the morning comes
and all the alcohol is drunk
- like the rest of us.

'Cos this long-distance relation-shit 
is killing me! 
But absence makes the heart grow -
Is that really true, do you know?
It's been getting me down, I s'pose.
Will I be alright?
Oh, fuck knows.

Oh, fuck knows
Oh, fuck knows
Oh, fuck knows. Do you know?

[Alright, calm down. There's no need for language like that.]

If you were here 
you'd be crying pebbles 
at my window;
throwing tears 
at the street - oh, I hate that scene
maybe you should drop the curtain now, 
maybe you should sit down 

'Cause this may come as a surprise
but I am wearing a disguise - 
I've stolen the face
of another man
one who looks
happier than I am
and can lie, and say "I'm fine"
(and can whistle)

Maybe I should go outside - 
Is it just sunlight that missing from my life? 
Is that the reason I'm like this half the time? 
I've still got this question 
"Will I be alright?" 
Oh, fuck knows.

Oh, fuck knows
Oh, fuck knows
Oh, fuck knows. Do you know?

© Ray Gunn Matthews 2021

Fuck Knows (Drama Girl)

[Interlude] It's Sad I'm Sad

Feat. Kurt Vonnegut from a talk called 'The Shape of Stories'
and Charles Bukowski in an interview about his novel 'Women'

Lyrics:

The most delicious of forbidden fruit 
I bit you in my dreams
you taste like strawberries. 
The trouble with forbidden things is
they're forbidden
and mostly for good reason 

I guess the best that you can be
is a friend who doesn't ignore me 
and I promise to repay that love and kindness
'cos all he gives you is sex and violence
sex
and violence. 

What do you see in him, anyway? 
What do you see in him, Emily? 
Do you see any of him in me - 
do you see anything - 
that you might like to try?
Tonight? Uh-oh, I've gone and made things incredibly awkward between us. 

'cos the trouble with girls (Like you) you won't just take my heart
oh no, you'll take my fucking mind
'Cos you've been taking things left and right
oh you've taken my sleep tonight 

I guess the worst is yet to come
although the damage to my heart's been done. 
So I'm sorry 'bout the awful lyrics
and the bad guitar playing, 
but a part of me hopes that you are listening - 
Well now you're listening! 

So, look what you've done to me Emily.
What do you see in him, Emily? 
Do you see any of him in me - 
do you see anything - 
that you might like to try?
Tonight? Or any other night; I'm never doing anything these days.

© Ray Gunn Matthews 2021

Girls (Like You)

Featuring a sample from the short docu. 'Dirty Girls' directed by Michael Lucid (Watch it! - It's an awesome 90's time capsule!)

Lyrics: 

Unlucky at cards
unlucky with men
you've fallen before
and you'll fall again
and you'll get back on the horse
tranquilizer; 
full of regrets.

Regretamine Girl, 
I must say
that I'm kind of impressed -
You're a fucking wreck-head, yeah!
But yeah, you're a beautiful mess. 
And in a gap 
between the lines
like seeing sunlight through the blinds
I read on your cardboard heart 
the words
PLEASE HANDLE WITH CARE - 
You're as FRAGILE
as your smile 
when you turn to me and say that you're 
"Alright, 
thanks for asking."

Regretamine Girl,
Was just about to say
that "I love you, 
I think you're best" -
When I throw up on your leg.
I make a beautiful, vomity mess 
on the delicate floral-print fabric of your dress - 
Because I can't take drugs
like you can.     

© Ray Gunn Matthews 2021

Regretamine Girl

Feat. Charles Bukowski in an interview on his novel 'Women'. 
and Björk <3 from that awesome video where she talks about her TV.

Lyrics:

It's all turned to shit. I watched our deepest love 
turn into 
the deepest hate
and waited and waited and waited and waited 
and waited some more 
until it was too late.
Now I'm in a state
of 
emergency:
Listening to Björk albums on repeat 
at 4 in the morning. 
Oh, I should get a fucking grip,   
try and get a hold 
a hold on sleep. 

I saw a beautiful couple 
they were 
riding rented bicycles. 
With a bagette they were headed to the park
and after dark? 
Well, who knows? They never kiss and tell,
no, they never kiss and tell. 
But reality is not just what you see! 
And I imagine that 
oh behind his back 
she is smoking crack 
and he's cheating on her with a man named Dan. 

And it's our patriarchal, macho-minded, homophobic society that dictates
that he'll never be honest about his sexuality -
no, he'll never own-up, he'll never be honest with himself and say who he is - And that's the saddest thing. 
But is it sadder than the fact that: 
When I am sad, I can't even imagine that anyone else can be happy; no you've all got to fucking suffer with me.   
(And I'm not even really that sorry.)
 
© Ray Gunn Matthews 2021

Self-Indulgent Break-Up Song (In a key I don't know)

A silly little song about working too hard and still not having enough money or energy left over to have fun. Recorded in my bedroom on my laptop; no mic, no pop-shield, and no mastering/mixing... should teach myself really. 

Lyrics:

You roll out of bed, straight into work and then home again.
You rinse and repeat, for 5 days a week
and when the weekend comes, you're too tired to have fun
or get fucked-up. Oh, what happened? 

You work that hard, just to be that poor
your friend's borrowed shoes, they've got more soul.
But a day will come (I promise) where money won't mean so much and we'll have fun 'cos we're used to having none (money, not fun)

Would it be cliche for me to say 
"I've been saving, you're a rainy day."? 
But when I look out my office window 
these are the days it never rains but I'm always poor
but what I'm waiting for, what I'm really waiting for
is a day that might come, where you might need someone to love.
So think of me; if you're down with poverty, insecurity, geeky things like game of thrones, comic books and being on you own. I'm always on my own. 

So baby if you're down with poverty maybe you can get down with me and buy me a cup of tea, or a beer, if that's not too much to ask for? 

D.W.P - Down With Poverty

Parked Police Car (With Nobody In It)

Lyrics:

Are you sick of scrolling? Have you thought about strolling? Take a walk into the woods, where there's no wifi, and get high on a bona fide alibi for why you haven't replied to the messages, the comments, the reactions - Oh seek real satisfaction! 

Because you are more than your 'about me', love yourself - not just your selfie. Life is a game we could be winning, if we remember that we are birds, we just tweet the words we should be singing. 

There's no emoji for feeling lonely. We've all got someone that we miss phoning on night's like tonight when your depression has got you feeling uptight and that Anti-Social Media has got you needing love, got you greedier, and you know you need more action but these dank dank memes are such a good distraction from your dreams.

But you know - You are more than your 'about me', love yourself - not just your selfie. Life is a game, and guess what? We're winning! Every time we realise that we are birds and we don't just have to tweet the words, we can be singing! la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la lah

Recorded in a bedroom in Hoi An, Vietnam by Space Leopard -
https://soundcloud.com/spaceleopardonthebeat

Ray Gunn Matthews

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