https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/430097867349426186/840637993777496084/4882e16.jpg

A female in the pummel party discord???

I can't believe my parents play League of Legends.

My Parents Play League

My sister is 8 years older than me and still hasn't grown a penis yet 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 😂😂!!! I saw her changing clothes and her penis still hasn't grown yet, what a loser! I grew a penis faster than her 🤯 ! I think she's jealous that I grew it faster because she keeps trying to steal it by pulling it, putting her mouth on it, and even putting it in the hole where her penis is supposed to grow from 😫 . I don't want my penis to get stolen, but it feels funny when she tries to take it 😮😍. Should I let her keep doing it, or should I keep my penis safe from her and make her stop by telling mom?

Image Source (SFW) - https://www.pixiv.net/en/artworks/85758662

My Sister Still Doesn't Have One

A user asks for help setting up a program. The administrator helps them verily.

Stable Diffusion Setup

https://twitter.com/acvalens/status/1790726244801085582

A lot of the stuff you hear about sex at the Olympics is true. And it can be very hard to deal with in a competitive environment. Some players thrive w/ it, others can’t handle the temptation. I should know: I played for Team USA a while back 🧵

I used to perform in the 100 meters. You might remember me from the Beijing games. What you might not know: I was a mess at the Olympic Village. They called me the 100 meter stallion, and it wasn’t for my performance on the track. I met with my coach and she decided the only solution was to put me in a chastity cage, just so I could compete without getting distracted. I agreed. And at first, it worked.

Unfortunately, the runner from France heard my cage jingle during my run. The analysts didn’t pick it up, but if you look at the footage, you can see her facial expression change from confusion to disgust. She sunk from 3rd to 4th as a result. It nearly caused an international incident, not because of her performance, but because it’s generally considered rude in France to have an audible chastity cage. I was incredibly embarrassed.

My coaches and I met, and we agreed I should personally apologize to her. Unfortunately, as a condition of her acceptance, she demanded I wear the chastity cage for the rest of the event — even after I finished competing. I had never bottomed so much in my life, and I was soon called the 100 member dash in the Olympic Village.

So yes, it can be very, very hard to be an athlete in the Olympics when you have that kind of temptation at your door. I should know. I have never been the same since I was in that environment, as I now wear a chastity cage every day, and I am in a loving and committed relationship with that runner from France. And I feel other athletes should know what they may be getting themselves into behind closed doors.

100 Meter Dash

This is so embarrassing but I literally have a fucking kink for trading like straight up medieval bartering type shit like the thought of like "a pound o' silk for a bucket o' milk" just turns me on for some reason that God Himself refuses to reveal to me. I can't even play Minecraft without getting hard as a fucking battering ram whilst trading emeralds for enchanting books and shit. I have this distinct memory of watching this movie when I was like 13 or 14 and it took place in like medieval Europe or something and this guy was haggling for like a hand sculpted pot or some shit and I had to leave the room to fucking masturbate I felt so weird after. I think that's where it started. I wish I had a normal kink like idk piss or something idk how I'm going to explain to my future partner that I want to roleplay as a 14th century merchant . Man.

Trading Kink

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GUJIuXOWAAAVgmu?format=jpg&name=medium

So Enamored

A fedora wearing redditor encounters a cute girl inside of his local McDonalds.

Gamer Girl In Mcdonalds

A science experiment goes horribly right.

This is an audio reading of the book "Pounded in the Butt By My Own Butt" by Chuck Tingle.

Pounded In The Butt By My Own Butt

A woman finds that she has a crippling ramen noodle addiction.

I Cant Stop Having Sex With Ramen Noodles

I Do Not Want To Bang The Animal Crossing Dog

Who wouldn't love to have sex with an Atronach?

Flame Atronach

I can't help the fact I have a giant penis, please stop.

Stop Making Fun Of Me

I Am An Anal Vore Fanatic

After some time working at an abortion clinic, I have come across many egregious activities that the other staff takes part in. The acts committed on the property are a sin against God.

I Am Anti Abortion

When someone makes a comment so awful you just have to let them know they're the worst person in the world.

Just Why

Why can't we go back to the old days of porn, where taboo wasn't the norm. No one really wants to fuck their family. At least... I hope so.

No More Incest Porn

She's so perfect you won't be able to get me away from her for not even one second.

Nessa Ultimate Waifu

For when someone posts something so inspiring you can't help but surrender yourself to them.

The Dankest Meme

For the person in your life you really hate.

Expressive Insult

Sometimes some of the temptations of life make you consider the possibility of Doublethink. It's the easy way out, right? To admit defeat is to admit weakness. You aren't weak, you're just subjectively stronger in a different field of expertise. Like sucking cock.

Not Gay

A man has a great night with someone he thought was a girl.

Taken from here https://twitter.com/JoeMeme4/status/1193850775325134848

Load Of Own Cum

A young man describes the reasons why he is up late looking at images of Pokemon while his pants are down.

Thumbnail art used by https://twitter.com/DAY_Walker1117

807 Pokemon

There exists a form of dominance that is as far as you can go without killing someone to assert that dominance. It is known as the Ultimate Form Of Dominance. As you train your skills and perfect this ability, you will be the most dominant creature of all, until you have to actually enact that dominance, rather than spout it out like you have actually done anything.

Ultimate Form Of Dominance

:rotating_light::rotating_light::rotating_light:HAPPY IMPEACHMENT DAY to all my freedom:statue_of_liberty:loving hoes:sweat_drops::tongue::tongue::tongue:who put the :peach: in IM:peach:MENT:stuck_out_tongue::stuck_out_tongue::stuck_out_tongue:looks like donald:moneybag::face_vomiting:finally got caught:woman_pilot::man_pilot:trying to call daddy ukraine:flag_ua::flag_ua: to take out hoe biden:older_adult_tone1::fire: but now we need to RIDE:horse_racing:CUMgress :classical_building:raw:weary::weary::tongue::tongue: so they can’t back down️, send this to:keycap_ten:of your:dancer_tone1:wokest:pencil:hoes:fire::banana:or say :wave:BYE to ur independence:pray::weary:eating that IMPEACHMENT:flag_us:DAY:flag_us:ASS :peach:is the only️ ethical:ok_hand:form of consumption:yum::yum::yum:under late capitalism:money_with_wings::dollar::yen::euro:so WE’RE ALL EATING TODAY☭☭☭️:eggplant::fire::sweat_drops::tongue:

Impeachment Special

@everyone
MERRY🎅COCKMAS🍆🍆🍆🍆😜😜😜🐓🐓🐓🐓 AND HAPPY 😁 HOE-LIDAYS 😲😲😲😩😩😩 THIS YEAR 📆 I'M DEFINITELY ✅ ON THE 😈😈😈NAUGHTY😈😈😈LIST📜📝 BECAUSE I'M 👈A GIGANTIC 🏳‍🌈🌈🏳‍🌈🌈🏳‍🌈🌈🏳‍🌈🌈🎄❄HO-HO-HOMOSEXUAL❄🎄🏳‍🌈🌈🏳‍🌈🌈🏳‍🌈🌈🏳‍🌈🌈 WHICH IS NOT 🙅‍♀️❌ VERY CHRISTIAN ⛪🙏 BUT I STILL CAN APPRECIATE 😜 SAINT DICK ✨🎉✨🎉 I CAN'T WAIT FOR 🎅SANTA🎅 TO SLIDE DOWN MY CHIMNEY ⬇🏠😜💦 AND STUFF MY STOCKING 🧦🎁😜 FULL OF DILDOS 😱🍆 AND PENIS PARAPHERNALIA 🍆🍆🍆🍆💦💦💦 BECAUSE I'M JUST A LITTLE 🤏 FESTIVE 🎄🎅🤶⛄❄🎁FAGGOT🏳‍🌈🌈🏳‍🌈🌈🍆🍆😜😜😩😩😩💦💦💦

SO TO ALL MY 💋👄💋👄💋SLUTTY 😩😩😩💋💋💋 SANTA'S 🎅🎅🏿🎅🏽🎅🏻 LITTLE HELPERS 😉😉😉👏👏& HORNY 😩😈 CHRISTMAS ELVES 🧝🏻‍♂️🧝🏻‍♂️🧝🏻‍♂️ REMEMBER LET IT "SNOW" 🌨🌨🌨❄❄❄❄⛄⛄⛄😜😜😜😜😜💦💦💦💦 AND DON'T FORGET TO 🌟✨🌟✨DECORATE✨🌟✨🌟 YOUR "TREE" 😜😜😜🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆 I'LL BE WAITING 🕚🕕🕠 UNDER THE MISTLETOE 🍃🦶 WRAPPED UP IN RIBBON 😳🎁🎀💝 WAITING ⏱ FOR YOU 👆TO UNWRAP 😳🎀 ME SO WE CAN TASTE 👅💦 EACHOTHER'S CANDY CANES 🍬✨🍬✨🍬✨😩😩😩🍆🍆🍆💦💦💦

Merry Christmas

Now that I think about it I really wanna fuck a Vaporeon

Vaporeon

Nothing makes me blow my load faster than the mere glimpse of a girl that was drawn in the two dimensional medium.

Anime Girls

UwU Pass

Life is better if we protect our women and make porn a man-only activity.

Get Women Out Of Porn

In a not too distant future, the child that spawned from that POPOTUS I once made love with did in fact save the 1%. He was a bright young child, a founder of many exclusive groups and powerful corporations that merged together into one to form a super corporation. This child found the alignment of stars deep within the Milky Way galaxy that lead to a new world. A world untouched by corruption and greed. That child thought, 'I can change that.' 

And so he did. He changed the course of history forever, taking the 1% to this new world and leaving the 99% behind. There was nothing left for the 1% in the old world, they had sapped Earth of all its resources and could no longer bleed dry the people below them. They needed new blood. They needed to continue making money and gaining power. It was here, that this child grew to be the ruler of Trump's World.

Presidential Pussy

It's just driving me up the wall, guys. I'd do anything her, anything but give in to her bootlicker fantasies.

My Girlfriend Is A Bootlicker

I would post the transcript of the text here but fuck that if I'm finding the source or even going to spend the time re-typing it. Don't ask for OCR I swear ShareX doesn't even know what a letter is these days.

Belle Delphine Has One New Comment

If you don't draw your women with dicks it means you hate women.

I Draw My Women With Dicks

Dear Activision:

Holy fucking shit. I want to bang the Gimp Suit Roze so goddamn bad. I can't stand it anymore. Every time I go to Verdansk I get a massive erection. I've seen literally every rule 34 post there is of her online. My dreams are nothing but constant fucking sex with Roze in her Rook skin. I'm sick of waking up every morning with six nuts in my boxers and knowing that those are nuts that should've been busted inside of Roze’s tight, sweaty pussy. I want her to have my babies.

Fuck, my fucking mom caught me with the neighbor. I'd dressed her in my sister's leather suit and went to fucking town. She hasn't said a word to me in 10 hours and I'm worried she's gonna take away my PS5. I might not ever get to see Roze again.

I Want To Bang The Warzone Roze Operator

Cute girl who does cringe narrations and is looking to voice act. Hit me up if you want some of that. I delete tracks from time to time. Soundcloud Premium is expensive.

Resi

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