none

I loaded the gun you cocked it and pulled the trigger 
looking for a little fun I did things that I would never 

loving you’s one of the worst things that ever happened to me 
now I can’t figure out why it took me this long to see 
I let you pull apart the pieces of my heart 
go ‘head and pull apart the pieces of my heart 

I said I wouldn’t mind then you went ahead and you did it used to blame you but now I know I was a hundred percent complicit 
loving you’s one of the worst things that ever happened to me now I can’t figure out why it took me this long to see 

I let you pull apart the pieces of my heart 
go ‘head and pull apart the pieces of my heart 

now that the deed’s been done I sit here with my own conscience 
both my hands are blood red no matter how much I wash them 

loving you’s one of the worst things that ever happened to me 
now I can’t figure out why it took me this long to see 
I let you pull apart the pieces of my heart 
go ‘head and pull apart the pieces of my heart

Pull Apart The Pieces of My Heart

Cerulean Tapes

TEENAGE FEVER

Live at Electric Lady

One More Smile (Live at Electric Lady)

violate me
talk down to me
hit me where it hurts
lie to me
forget about me
use me
give up on me
all I’ll do is love you more

love feels like having the same relationship with expressing your feelings so you both keep your mouth shut
love is realizing how unforgiving I’ve been to you
feeling guilty about it and swallowing it down
no we don’t talk about that kind of stuff with each other - we just don’t 

sometimes I see you in my dreams
can’t escape when I’m asleep
I’m so selfish I’m so weak
it’s no wonder why you left me
I walk in moonlight by the sea
picturing you in my arms again

all I'll do is love you more

you used to lend your shoulder
you used to smile whenever I saw your face
asked me how things are going
gave me the time of day
you used to be a backbone
you gave all that you had and you didn’t take
picked me up on my worst days
you used to rep for me

but you don’t care you don’t care you don’t care no more
well if you don’t care
then I don’t

you used call me up every once in a while
just to shoot the shit 
you used to ask me to bail you out whenever you got yourself in a bind
you used to talk about how you make new friends but keep the old ‘cause one is silver and the other is gold
you used to ask me if we would still hang out when we both can’t walk cuz we’ve gotten so old

but you don’t care you don’t care you don’t care no more

I don’t know why I get so mad
people change
people hear half the truth
people assume
people flock to whoever’s the coolest in the room
what’s new?

You Don't Care

Don’t need no satisfaction
It wastes my time
Don’t need no hard reaction
love being that I’m prude
 
I have my books to read and
My teachers to please
Who needs romance when
I have all of these?
But I’m still alone
I am still alone
 
Who needs romance when I walk
Out the car to my room?
My pants are soggy but who cares
I had fun with you
 
But I’m still alone
But I am still alone
 
And who needs to love when it always ends so brutally?
And who needs to waste their time kissing? Oh no not me
 
And who needs to love
When it’s just as easy to think about?
Or go to the movies and pretend
That your life is just complete
 
But no you are still alone

I am still alone

Still Alone

catie doesn’t like how I look
said I’m a little too gay
that’s what I overheard after
a school dance in the 7th grade

and from that moment on I
tried every possible disguise
nothing ever seemed to work

guess I gotta bad case of gay face
a dead giveaway
no matter what I do there’s some things I can’t erase
can’t pray it away
guess I gotta just live with my bad case of gay face

I’m a straight 6 and a gay 5
I eat my feelings I dunno why
my face full of acne doesn’t help
never had much to kiss and tell
Billy only called me up when he ran out of other boys in town to fuck
if only I wasn’t so ashamed

Gay Face

kinda like paradise
whenever you’re by my side

my mind’s empty with static
hope you don’t mind my nervous tick
when I was twelve I had a secret folder
it contained some porn and poem for you

I’ll ride horses with you through the night
sword and shield you know I’m your ally
harmonizing to Mary J Blige
deadpool actually kissing a guy

kind of like paradise
whenever you’re by my side
kind of like paradise
whenever you’re by my side

don’t you give me those puppy eyes
I know you’ve got a favor in mind
I love those outfits that they wore on Twin Peaks
my mom watched that when I was a baby

you’re so beautiful I can’t lie
better than summer in bed-stuy
what’s your fave song on homogenic?
will you be the butthead to my beavis?

Kinda Like Paradise

can’t fight my lonely
it’s been too long
keep on wandering
far from home

can’t look at myself
I’m ashamed
and I don’t have anybody
else to blame

it’s my worst wounds
that I let bleed
I keep running from the truth
and it runs from me

as long as I look away
I am cursed
I’ll never love nobody if
I don’t love myself first

thought if I waited
the day would come
when all my problems fell away
one by one

I kept on searching
for the best distraction
kept my mind occupied
and ignored my passion

it’s my worst wounds
that I let bleed
I keep running from the truth
and it runs from me

as long as I look away
I am cursed
I’ll never love nobody if
I don’t love myself first

I'll Never Love Nobody If I Don't Love Myself First

happy im

Postcards

Part of a collaboration project with Terrace Martin called 'Sneek'

Produced by: Terrace Martin, Jeff Gitelman
Recorded by: Noah Madrid & Gallant
Mixed by: Terrace Martin & Noah Madrid
Mastered By: Rick Carson

sneek

Devil’s Advocate

Stream 🖤

Lemonade

Piano recording engineered by Charles Myers at Mason Jar Studio Brooklyn, NY
Mixed by Mason Bonner at RCM Studios Chicago, IL
Mastered by Zach Lipkins
Photo by Blythe Thomas

stay with it
you don’t need to water it down
no one else has the same story

stay with it please
stay with it please
you can take all the time that you need

I know that you worry
what if nobody cares?
and you're sorry
you had a big enough head to

stay with it
stay with it please
stay with it
stay with it

something is broken
so fucked it’s not hard to feel hopeless
I see you sleeping while the sun’s out
anything to distract you from your doubts

bro

I’m not here to tell you to get up
I know you have had it rough
I don’t know anybody more tough

I’m here to remind you
of the image you drew of yourself when you believed nobody could stop you
he’s still there
But you choose to look away
I think you’re scared of your own greatness
can’t you see it?
can’t you see it?

I know that you worry
what if nobody cares?
and you're sorry
you had a big enough head to

stay with it
stay with it please
stay with it
stay with it

I know the pain of running a race in the wrong direction
I know the pain of a long and slow bitter break
I know how it feels to have nobody when you can’t stand up for yourself
I know how it feels to push your problems into a box 
and place it on a shelf
it’s time to realize that you have exactly what you need
its deep down inside behind the lies you tell yourself to get by
I’m only here to remind you
of who you actually are

Kinda Like Paradise

Rich Saunders

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