Well I know why I came here today,
To get a book while not having to pay,
I'm so comfy as I sit in this chair,
Reading a story about Boo Boo the bear
Librarians to the left of me,
Readers to the right, here I am,
Sitting in the library with you.

Yes I'm sitting in the library with you,
And I'm wondering what it is I should do,
It's so hard to keep this smile from my face,
Dropped my book, now, I'm losing my place,
Librarians to the left of me, Readers to the right,
Here I am, sitting in the library with you.

Well you started out with Shakespeare,
And then read all of Charles Dickens,
And your friends, they come and tell me,
That you have started reading Shelley,
Shush.... Shush.....

Trying to make some sense of it all,
But I can see that it makes no sense at all,
Is it cool to read some Evelyn Waugh,
'Cause I don't think that I can take anymore
Librarians to the left of me, Readers to the right,
Here I am, sitting in the library with you.

You have read some Stephen King,
And obviously some Tolstoy,
And your friends, they come and tell me,
That you have started reading Shelley,
Shush.... Shush.....

Well I know why I came here today,
To get a book while not having to pay,
I'm so comfy as I sit in this chair,
Reading a story about Boo Boo the bear
Librarians to the left of me,
Readers to the right, here I am,
Sitting in the library with you.
Yes I'm sitting in the library with you,
Sitting in the library with you.

Sitting In The Library With You

This contest
I must tell you friends
Is about nostalgia
and musical trends

But as I read
down the shopping list
I think of all
the greats they've missed

Elvis Presley
where is he
This really truly
cannot be

No Bill Haley
with his Comets either
Please wait a while
as I take a breather

I don't like to whine
but feel I must
No Leadbelly
it's so unjust

Where are the Beatles
this is a joke
What about Dylan
or a bit of folk

No classical
I can't forgive
Without this
how can you live

So sadly dear chums
I just can't compete
'cause there is nothing here
with a decent beat

So goodbye and farewell
enough of my moans
It's headphones on
and the Rolling Stones

Our hero walks off the dance floor listening to the music being blasted into his head by the greatest ever rock band. His fingers start clicking, and then oblivious to all around him and with a voice that could take planes out of the sky he burst into song;


"If you start me up
If you start me up I'll never stop
If you start me up
If you start me up I'll never stop
I've been running hot
You got me ticking gonna blow my top
If you start me up
If you start me up I'll never stop
You make a grown man cry..........."

Start Me Up

Dead Man's Hand

I was playing Poker the other night
when I felt the devil in the air
I turned my cards in disbelief
Dead Man's Hand was there

Eights and Aces as black as death
were nestled in my hand
The very cards that Hickok got
when his death was planned

The dealer asked if I wanted a hit
so I discarded my Jack
A Full House was on right now
as I heard the pistol crack

My brain exploded with red hot fire
as the bullet passed through my scull
The spasm of death was with me now
as my senses started to dull

Fingers reaching for my last card
was the final movement I made
in the deadliest game of poker 
that I had ever played

The police arrived astonished
at a game between five bard's
And announced that they had seen my death
as it was written in the cards

Boom, Boom!

https://soundcloud.com/roderick-blakeman/sets/rods-poems



Dead Man's Hand by Roderick Blakeman

Strictly for snails

I am a little snail
who is learning how to dance
but I fear it's not going well
as I try to leap and prance

The teacher keeps instructing me
to do the things I can't
my problem is when dancing
I'm about as nimble as a plant

She is forever telling me
to go quick, quick, quick, slow
but how to do the first three
I simply do not know

So I think I'll be a wallflower
and lean against the wall
for dancing is just not my thing
I'm just no good at all


Strictly for Snails

I am a little insect

I am a little insect
and I've just grown some wings
but what I wish I really had
is something sharp that stings

For flying up in the air
seems dangerous to me
with wasps and hornets up there
and the buzzing bumble bee

I've got nothing to protect me
from their nasty bites
I'm very ill equipped my friends
to get involved in fights

So I think I will stay down here
among the worms and bugs
They seem a much more friendly lot
especially the slugs
 

I Am A Little Insect

A Close Shave is a poem by Maureen Higson

Dwelling inside Alfie Arnotts insides
was the keeper of Alfs dodgy liver,
The state of the organ was causing concern,
it was tired, and had started to wither,
 
He confides in the keeper of Alfies lame heart
which was in a bad way, just the same,
So they both called the manager down  from Head office,
(Who was trying to jolt Alfies brain,)
 
They are feeling defeated by Alfs appetites
as they watch their hosts arteries throb,
if they fail to come up with a happy solution
all three will be out of a job.
 
A solution was found, out of sheer desperation
They voted to come out on strike.
And force the said Alf to give up his lifestyle
to stop eating the food he might like.
 
So now Alf is picking at food meant for rabbits.
And that's how it's going to stay.
He took a bad turn when his keepers downed tools,
He's fed up.. but alive to this day.

A Close Shave


Kindness is a poem by Roderick Blakeman


Once upon a time starts the tale
about a fairy and a giant brown snail
they had met long ago by a stream
when the fairy had been eating ice-cream
 
Snail asked for a bite
of the cold creamy white
and fairy did say it was ok
“But just the one
‘cause it’s hot in the sun
and then we can go off and play”
 
But snail went slurp
and ate the whole thing
leaving fairy crying and sad
“You nasty brown snail”
said fairy out loud
“You really are terribly bad”
 
The big snail laughed at the fairy
and said “I don’t care what you think”
“It’s you who are horrid and nasty
‘cause you haven’t shared your cold drink”
 
“Why would I do that”
said the fairy
“When I know you’ll sup the whole lot
if you had not eaten all of my ice-cream
I would have shared my drink like a shot”
 
“It’s because you are nasty and greedy
that you’ll never have any friends
and that means no one to play with
and this is where this friendship ends"
 
But snail sloped off uncaring
he really wasn’t troubled at all
for he thought such things as friendship
were stupid and not very cool
 
It was only later that his actions were felt
when he was old and all left alone
nobody ever came visiting
and snail let out a sad groan
 
“I wish that I had been kinder
to all those in the past that I met
for being nasty and rude to all others
I am now starting to pay off the debt”
 
So the moral of this story I’ll tell you
it’s to be nice and kind through your life
or the pain that you’ll suffer when older
will hurt more than the cut from a knife

Kindness

They asked me why she's smiling by Roderick Blakeman

It's obvious why the girl's smiling
I find it hard to believe that you ask
the reason the girl is so happy
is that she has just completed her task

She's coaxed and cajoled the poor fool of a man
until he went down on one knee
Now she's married the sap and ruined his life
she'll change, just you wait and see

She'll go from being all sweetness and light
to a freak that controls all she sees
He'll never get a moment of peace anymore
until he escapes from her clutches and flees

So don't ask me again why she's smiling
for it hurts me to know the full truth
she's a vulture dressed in doves clothing
and about to destroy the fools youth

They Asked Me Why She's Smiling

A poem written for a competition where you hit shuffle on your music player and wrote a poem about the music track that came up. I hit 'Stolen Car by Bruce Springsteen.

This is a little ditty,
that aims to be quite witty.
It will be about the title
apparently quite vital.

The challenge, 
I did accept
and since then, 
I've hardly slept.

'Stolen Car',
 what a choice,
Springsteen singing,
unique voice.

I know not what,
to write down.
Words escape,
this poetic clown.

I fear I've failed
at first jump.
Down to earth, 
mighty bump.

"Stolen car",
who did nick it?
a criminal,
that's the ticket.

But hold your horses,
who can that be?
No, that's untrue,
it wasn't me.

I might be dodgy,
but I'm not a thief.
don't you dare,
give me grief.

No, I didn't do it,
it just ain't true.
whoever's guilty,
has upped and flew.

They stole the motor,
drove it away.
and have left poor muggins
here to pay

Well so be it,
I don't care.
evidence,
not a prayer.

So up your's darling,
you can't prove nout.
I'll dodge the law,
with reasonable doubt.

So there you have it
I think I'm done.
it might not win,
but i had some fun.


Stolen Car (Bruce Springsteen)

I read this great poem and put my dreadful voice to it, I hope I haven't ruined it for anyone. The original write can be found here. allpoetry.compoem12640271-Demo…le-by--JR--noguest

Demon's Rule


An ebony backdrop sets the scene
of evil's dark intent
with flaming sword that's ready to
put souls in deep torment.
That smoky haze will blind the truth
eliciting great pain,
while dressed in steely magnitude
this demon starts his reign.
 
A sword that's fashioned from a curse
and thrown right into hell,
where demon rules with misery
that bids all souls farewell.
Each piece of this barbaric plate
will quench all spirit flame,
this world of hell and suffering
he will not e'er explain.
 
Demonic verse he chants to all
to silence of the soul,
then breaks the bonds of saving grace
to never more be whole.
He weaves that blade with history
when all fell at his feet,
he roams the mind and won't let go
with unrelenting heat.
 
Along the rim of curse and chance
he'll meet your fears right there,
and kill the beast that dares to fight
within his burning lair.
Those eyes will drill a hole into
where sanity thinks twice,
his sword then falls without a thought
each cut is so precise.
 
Each deadly thrust was long ago
forged from Satanic verse,
and if you listen carefully
you'll hear that ancient curse,
that promised all would be destroyed
who lived within the light,
and now the flames cascade with thrill
a blazing stalactite.
 
The ebony haze is conjuring
a trail of swirling lies
and ever after souls will wail
about their cruel demise.
But he has won the Demon wars
as prophecy foretold,
with horns of iron reaching out
in mayhem uncontrolled.

