Meolmastdethiwaabbymybr

Court,Date,Anx...

Richard Thomas Clear

Body dysmorphia, depression, anxiety, desperation... 

The Hurt

When Christ popped over to Hell to free the souls who lived a good life before Christianity, He might have had a good time with some sinners... We're all tainted by original sin and carnal desire, all of us, even a twixt between God and Man is part Man.

Fuckin Hell

With thanks and apologies to 
Ivan Zanotti's MyMadnessWorks
https://store.steampowered.com/app/429720/IMSCARED/

Imscared

Chronophobia

a cold doubled-edge new razorblade
against my warm flesh

cut

blood comes

deeper

blood

release now

blood

Cold New Blade

Innocence Hurts

Boseman

How do you know that I'm not real?
How do you know that you are?
You cannot tell me that you're better than me,
So shut up and let me be. 

I watch them speak with golden tongues,
Their laughter rings like cathedral bells.
I shrink behind my folded arms,
A shadow cast by someone else.

Their feet are sure, their gaze is firm,
They own the ground I walk upon.
I stumble through a borrowed voice,
A minor note in their grand song.

How do you know that I'm not real?
How do you know that you are?
You cannot tell me that you're better than me,
So shut up and let me be.
 
My thoughts arrive with broken wings,
Too soft to rise, too slow to land.
While others paint in bold, bright strokes,
I smudge a line with trembling hand.

They do not see this weight I wear,
This coat of doubt stitched thick with fear.
Each step I take, a question mark,
Each glance confirms I don’t belong here.

How do you know that I'm not real?
How do you know that you are?
You cannot tell me that you're better than me,
So shut up and let me be. 

Yet still I breathe, I write, I wait.
A seed can sprout beneath the stone.
And maybe in this quiet smallness,
There’s strength in being not yet known.

How do you know that I'm not real?
How do you know that you are?
You cannot tell me that you're better than me,
So shut up and let me be.

How do you know that I'm not real?

Hurt

Short cover of the Jackson Browne song popularised by Nico.

A longer and better than my version: https://soundcloud.com/oneillsweetd/st-vincent-these-days-dumbo?si=e852019d7588470a97380ac4b4d14f59&utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharing

These Days

Thanks to Bellebasaur for the angry yelling - https://freesound.org/people/Bellebasaur/sounds/484179/

The Battle of Selves

Hypnagogia

Flee From Me

An experimental version of the Fontaines D. C. song

Starburster

Underclassed

You follow the word, but not the way
you can try to pull me down, can you fk my day?
Throw what you will at me, I'm dying anyway
I don't need a flag, I don't need to stay mate

Pulling at those strings with every word
Why do I follow stars, it's so absurd
I just need to stop my fking mind
before I turn to the damn "normal kind"

FIRE BURNS
FIRE BURNS WITHIN
FIRES CHURN
THIS MESS WE'RE ALL IN

Nothing more
Nothing left to make me cry
Sitting bored
Shit scared to go outside

I can live in fear
It's never stopped me before
Rain down all your hell
I know it's all you've got in store

Kissed the skies
You can kiss my arse
You're gonna die
And so will I

I'm gonna last
It's not over yet

RTC765

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