VOLCANO ALARM (2:38)
There's a danger lurking here in this peaceful landscape. Disguised as a mountain, it's time for you to plan your escape. Your smoke detector won't save you from the ash and lava that ensue. It's time for you to purchase a volcano alarm. It's time for you to purchase a volcano alarm. They're not really affordable, but is that a chance you are willing to take? Swap the batteries twice a year, or that may be your last mistake. Your smoke detector won't save you from the ash and lava that ensue. It's time for you to purchase a volcano alarm. It's time for you to purchase a volcano alarm.

Volcano Alarm

FRANKENSTEIN’S LAUNDROMAT (2:57)
Your clothes are dirty and you need to get them clean. I know the weirdest Laundromat that you have ever seen. So sort all your colors and bring them on down. If you ask me, it’s the greatest wash in town. It's never very crowded so you won't wait in line. But the best part is that it’s owned by Frankenstein. Frankenstein’s Laundromat is where it’s at, It’s better than Dracula’s, I know this for a fact. Frankenstein’s Laundromat is where it’s at, It’s better than Dracula’s, I know this for a fact. It's mostly self-serve, but they can fluff and fold. You know your safest bet is machine wash on cold. Over fifteen washers, go ahead take your pick. Triple-load dryers help you get it done real quick. They sell detergent, if you are so inclined, It's not open very late, last wash at 9:00pm. Frankenstein’s Laundromat is where it’s at, It’s better than Dracula’s, I know this for a fact. Wash your sheets, wash your shirts, wash your jeans, wash your skirts,  Wash your towels, wash your hair, wash your couch, he doesn't care. We call him Frankenstein, and he owns a laundromat. He'll clean your clothes, and he's pretty good at it. Frankenstein’s Laundromat is where it’s at, It’s better than Dracula’s, I know this for a fact.

Frankenstein's Laundromat

WAFFLE PUTTY (2:19)
Those waffles look awful and completely incomplete. Level off those ditches before you start to eat. Waffle Putty, Waffle Putty, fill those valleys up. Waffle Putty, Waffle Putty, whatever it is you call those indents on waffles, you've got to fill them with butter and syrup grout. Stop that top's not level. You've still got some work to do. Slather until it is flat. When it's smooth's your cue to chew. Waffle Putty, Waffle Putty, fill those valleys up.  Waffle Putty, Waffle Putty, whatever it is you call those indents on waffles, you've got to fill them with butter and syrup grout. Beep, bop, biddle diddle fop.  Pour the batter on the griddle, until you have to stop. Valleys, ditches, cups, syrup catchers, or indents, no matter what you call them, you gotta fill them in. Waffle Putty, Waffle Putty, such a sweet and tasty treat. Waffle Putty, Waffle Putty, you know if you ask me, it will definitely be the thing to make your delicious breakfast complete. 

Waffle Putty

MIME DETECTIVE (2:13)
I've never seen a mime detective.  I have a hunch he'd be quite effective. Mingling with all the cops on the scene.  Solving tricky cases as if they're routine. Finding clues in invisible boxes. Getting in the way, being kind of obnoxious. Smearing white paint all over his hands.  Contaminating evidence and disobeying commands. I've never seen a mime detective. I have a hunch he'd be quite effective. With a real keen sense of observation, he'd surely have the police chief’s admiration. Pretending to pull on a rope all day. Refusing to leave so he gets overtime pay. Ask him what his theory is on a crime, then watch him wave his hands around because he’s a mime. I've never seen a mime detective.  I have a hunch he'd be quite effective. He'd be cracking cold cases all day long while thinking of a tune but never humming along. Doesn't wear a trench coat, he's not the type. Instead he's in a turtleneck or black and white stripes. Once he solves a case the real work starts, as he re-enacts the crime playing all of the parts. I've never seen a mime detective.  Probably because he'd be ineffective.  No one involved would get anything done.  It's a terrible idea… unless you’re the felon.

Mime Detective

KUNG FU BARBERSHOP (2:51)
If your hair's long, you can have them chop some off the top. That's what they do at the famous Kung Fu Barbershop. Trim your sideburns, with a real silver throwing star. If you ask me, there is nothing I've seen more bizarre. Cutting your hair, while using kung fu, there is no one else that can do what they do. Karate and Ju-Jitsu don't make the cut.  Maybe t’ai chi, but only somewhat.  Shampoo and wood boards, they really go through quite a lot. That's what they do at the famous Kung Fu Barbershop. Clip your moustache or use their fists to shape your pompadour. Enter the parlor, after one time you'll be back for more. Make an appointment, there's no way that you can just walk in. But it's worth it, I bet you'll get a big kick out of them.  Cutting your hair, while using kung fu, there is no one else that can do what they do. Karate and Ju-Jitsu don't make the cut.  Maybe t’ai chi, but only somewhat. No hair dryers, instead they just twirl their nunchucks non-stop. That's what they do at the famous Kung Fu Barbershop.

Kung Fu Barbershop

STUNT DOUBLE SHUFFLE (2:32)
Listen very carefully, you've got some new dance moves to learn.  Raise your hands above your head, wave them in a panic, all while you turn.  It's kind of like the Watusi, but with a little bit of a Twist,  It's called the stunt double shuffle, and it goes exactly like this... do the stunt double shuffle.  You think your day at work was rough? How so, may I inquire?  I was shot, pushed off a ledge... and then my boss set me on fire. Do the stunt double shuffle.  Before this song is over, I've just got one last request. Pretend to drive off of a cliff in slow motion, and look distressed.

Stunt Double Shuffle

Song from Satanic Puppeteer Orchestra's Debut 4 CD Box Set; Disc 1, Track 2.

I Stole Your Daddy's Time Machine

Song from Satanic Puppeteer Orchestra's Debut 4 CD Box Set; Disc 2, Track 1.

Remax

Song from Satanic Puppeteer Orchestra's Debut 4 CD Box Set; Disc 2, Track 3.

Ornithophobia

Song from Satanic Puppeteer Orchestra's Debut 4 CD Box Set; Disc 3, Track 5.

What Is The Most Expensive Way to Feed a Zebra?

Song from Satanic Puppeteer Orchestra's Debut 4 CD Box Set; Disc 1, Track 3.

SatanicPuppeteerOrchestra

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