The morning where I woke and rode again
Never looking back to you, my friend
So much pain behind your ass
When you can tell my worlds were lost
But I will see that you would chase
Riding on the [?]
I can't afford to help you up
I don't have time to just give up
I went back so many steps

The morning where I woke & rode again

October 14

I wasn't thinking
The night I told you all about my feelings
But you just listened
Shared a smile or two
I loved looking at you

I matched the distance
Met you on a train and you made me think that I was going insane
But in a good way
If that makes any sense
I kind of enjoyed it

Te distance

Apple cores unholy chores i have to raise my voice to speak
My thoughts got bad i dropped the bag with eggshells cracked i know i lack all that u need i cannot breathe my lungs r filled with smoke from trees so u tell me i need to leave
And i did
And now im wondrin how

How i even got this far
Got sympathy for all ur scars
Running circles bowing down
But im still fucking wondering how

Broken bones and heart shaped stones
They block my road the way to home
The hedges trimmed the blades just skimmed
Above my head i lay in bed
The ceiling stares into my soul
I didn't wanna have to go
U forced my hand
And we've found land
But now im scared
And still wondering how

How i even got this far
Got sympathy for all ur scars
I'm running circles bowing down
But im still fucking wondering how
And im still fucking wondering how
And im still fucking wondering how

How i even got this far
Got sympathy for all ur scars
I'm running circles bowing down
But im still fucking wondering how

The snow will stick upon the ground
The sky got dark from all the clouds
It's getting cold i say out loud
That im still fucking wonderin how

Wondering how

Can we just forget about
Everything I said last night?
Didn't really wanna fight
I'll tell you lies to make you feel better
I was off pain pills
Just waiting to fucking feel better
Now you got under my skin
I'm itchy like a sweater

What I want
Is nothing but happiness
And all I get is stressed at the best
'till it's time to clock out for the week
I blacked out, I'm just trying to feel better


Can we just forget about
Everything I said last night?
Didn't really wanna fight
I'll tell you lies to make you feel better
Letting go of all distractions
Are my feelings in line?
Are my feelings in linе?
Let myself rot and decay in my room
I can makе a few friends, as long as they aren't you
Time will pass by and I'm feeling alright
Cuz life isn't bad when I'm sober, I cry
Shed heavy tears to pass all the years
And Im making sure everything's not to be feared

And we tumble, we're humble
Just keep talking
Just keep whispering in my ear

What I want
Is nothing but happiness
And all I get is stressed at the best
'till it's time to clock out for the week
I blacked out, I'm just trying to feel better

And we tumble, we're humble
Just keep talking
Just keep talking
Just keep whispering in my ear

Feel better

Silly ideologies

Everything feels very wrong
I tried to write a silly song
About the tears I shed at night
Who could've guessed that you were right
And I was wrong about your plight
Doing drugs all fuckin' night
And now I haven't got a clue
Why I shed those tears for you

I'm lost and found I've figured out
The taste and smell I am in hell
It's red and black
A heart attack
Of honey dew to change us new
Back in the dust I covered up
All of the cuts inside my mouth
A dry and drought we've headed south
To save our souls amidst the clouds

A little dip inside thе lip of space and time
A sip of wine
I could carе less about a pest telling me lies
I dig inside a little hole filled up with mice
With little dreams under their eyes
Fulfilling things among the wings of fantasy
Please set me free

I'm lost and found I've figured out
The taste and smell I am in hell
It's red and black
A heart attack
Of honey dew to change us new
Back in the dust I covered up
All of the cuts inside my mouth
A dry and drought we've headed south
To save our souls amidst the clouds

Did you feel nervous
Hit the door with your fist
Was it on purpose
Did it feel worth it

I'm lost and found I've figured out
The taste and smell I am in hell
It's red and black
A heart attack
Of honey dew to change us new
Back in the dust I covered up
All of the cuts inside my mouth
A dry and drought we headed south
To save our souls amidst the clouds

Lost and found

[?] 'bout to break
His mother lays in bed awake
And father's working late at night
They've said their worries for your life
And mother tiptoes down the stairs
You're very scared of how they care
She whispers softly in your ear
"We miss you even though you're here"

Time moved on and on, there's nothing left to say
Except acknowledge how you used to get away
All they wanna know is how to keep you safe
But if you listen on, still by your side they'll stay

[?] 'bout to break
His mother lays in bed awake
And father's working late at night
They've said their worries for your life
And mother tiptoes down the stairs
You're very scared of how they care
She whispers softly in your ear
"We miss you even though you're here

We miss you even though you're here

Woke up in a pool of sweat
Told me I haven't paid my debt
Mommy said I shouldn't fret
I'll probably go and pass this test
Realize what's before my eyes
Soundly take off my disguise
Funny how I didn't know
But it felt like I loved you so

The pictures hanging on my walls
Always reminded me of fall
The colors had specific sounds
Couldn't tell when I looked around

How am I the bigger one?
When I never took out my gun
And played along to all your games
But never really felt the same
I took your word and ran with it
But now it's time to call a quits
I'm tired and I'm bored of this
Like paint on walls, the way it sits

The sun sets on my day, I cry
The tears flowing from my eyes
My thoughts keep getting worse and worse
The Xanax I put in your purse
Might kill me, but I will not hurt
Meaningful, but just hearing words
Drift off to another place
Might be nice, but another day

How are you so hyperfocused?
Buzzing in my ears, the locusts
Eat my flesh and beg for more
Don't really know what's left in store
Someone's taking over now
So can you help me figure out?
Like, what I did? The cherry pits
All crushed around me, what is this?

And how am I the bigger one?
When I never took out my gun
And played along to all your games
But never really felt the same
I took your word and ran with it
But now it's time to call a quits
I'm tired and I'm bored of this
Like paint on walls, the way it sits

Paint

That fateful day my mother passed away
I cried and laid there in her grave
It smelled of worms and rubber bands
And then the hands the hands the hands

Pulled all of me deep in the depths
Of heaven hell together
Crept a lonely with who spoke her spells
But couldn't seem to fix herself
And then i woke up in a place

I'd never seen but i related to the cracks along the wall
My eyes sunk in as i grew tall
And then you called me by my name
But i never was someone to blame
Why must we all be filled with hate
The moon came out a little late

And so i remain here most every night
10,000 miles up in the sky
I'm here to promise you're alright
To be your friend to be your light

A lesson from the moon

A thousand times and months again
I find you laying there, my friend
Drunken soldier, come again
They left you twitching in the vent
Months the snowing, cold and wind and
You were frozen to a crisp
But I still grabbed you by the wrist
And gripped your shoulder with my fist
And I said I love you so
You almost died and even though
It happens almost every night
So can we savor all our time

Toxic waste's inside my mind
It thinks about you all the time
Losing you to carelessness
When surely ends your endlessness

Don't stop taking all these pills
And pulling drapes over the hills
To cover all the hopelessness
I'm sure we both went into clear
But it won't happen very soon
The clock it ticks you close to noon
The time when we all fucking died
So can we savor all our time
Toxic waste's inside my mind
It thinks about you all the time
Losing you to carelessness
When surely ends your endlessness

Now you're laying in the bed
Your eyes are all back into your head
My heart begins to break
I knew this day would've come
Was it really worth it all
Frolicking through all our flaws?
I'll never hear you speak again
Your life is over
Where's my end?

Carelessness

Sometimes I gotta settle down and get out
You told me everything we said, we cried out
And I saw you going down the hill, I've chased you
Through scraped my knee and other hurt the sky blue
And I found the polaroid you took in my room
And thoughts that are overwhelming me just break through
Why can't the world acknowledge anything we do?
Trying so hard, but we never really may do

And broken hearts make for good words
But it sucks when we get hurt
I wish I was clear

Sometimes we fight and scream and yell and shut up
Wish I could come and make a feelings block stop
Lifе's pain in art, so I try to relate to
Every thing that I could possibly hold on to

Drugs and love
Aren't enough
When I see you
My world lights up
I wish you were clear

Sometimes I gotta settle down and get out

Sometimes ft. Phoebe bridgers

Flour and sawdust

Tell me all your deepest secrets
Boiling feelings in your brain
Drugs and drinks have held us tightly
Made us all go quite insane
But we've all stayed close together
We won't ever break these chains
Mom and dad have tried so hard
And brothers, sisters passed away
We are whole when we're together
Until our twenty-eighth day
Our sins have made the sky turn gray
Now I'm out and on my own
But I'll see you all some other day
When we are cured and clean again
It'll take a bit of patience
To get back on our feet again
From doing lines and sipping wine
And always thinking that we can
Get our shit together by ourselves
It's too much fucking pain
We need to know that we can ask for help
So we don't fall again
Standing in a parking lot
Without a car at 2 am
At some radio station
Picking up the broken pieces
That I scattered on your floor
We'll cry 'cause I won't do our chores
We are whole when we're together
Until our twenty-eighth day
Our sins have made the sky turn gray
Now I'm out and on my own
But I'll see you all some other day
When we are cured and clean again
I went back so many steps
Laughing softly
Crying slowly
Orange umbrellas
Pouring rain
We are whole when we're together
Until our twenty-eighth day
Our sins have made the sky turn gray
Now I'm out and on my own
But I'll see you all some other day
When we are cured and clean again

Assignment song

Can we just forget about
Everything I said last night?
Didn't really wanna fight
I'll tell you lies to make you feel better
I was off pain pills
Just waiting to fucking feel better
Now you got under my skin
I'm itchy like a sweater

What I want
Is nothing but happiness
And all I get is stressed at the best
'till it's time to clock out for the week
I blacked out, I'm just trying to feel better

Can we just get out of town and clean around again
So I can stop thinking of drugs to take
Or any ways to make me feel better
On my mind just hoping I'd fucking feel better
In this abyss and I cannot forget her
Letting go of all distractions
Are my feelings in line?
Are my feelings in linе?
Let myself rot and decay in my room
I can makе a few friends, as long as they aren't you
Time will pass by and I'm feeling alright
Cuz life isn't bad when I'm sober, I cry
Shed heavy tears to pass all the years
And Im making sure everything's not to be feared

And we tumble, we're humble
Just keep talking
Just keep whispering in my ear

What I want
Is nothing but happiness
And all I get is stressed at the best
'till it's time to clock out for the week
I blacked out, I'm just trying to feel better

And we tumble, we're humble
Just keep talking
Just keep talking
Just keep whispering in my ear

Feel better ft. Stagehoax

I REALLY LOVE THIS SONG idk why jodi deleted it but i upload it here 4 the people who wanna listen to it 

[Lyrics] 

(see me shake
set me free
things are bad
and I am down
it's nice to know you will always be around) 

and the spooky ghost will come around
when we are lost and can't be found
when fearing trust cos i hurt you
ill start to make the final clue
cos they're afraid to give me up
but not of what's inside the cup
im terrified and I can't breathe
the spooky ghost is in the sheet

we'll find our way back forward
just because you spoke those four words
cut 2 holes out for our eyes
can we fall in, can we fall in
can we fall in before we die
all alone again my life
can we fall in b4 we die

the spooky ghost is coming close
while we take off our dirty clothes
the list is long, of things to do
like jumping in the way for you
Id drown myself to hear the song
forgotten it's been far too long
the candy wrappers cover me
if i am you, then you are me

the rasberries are bleeding
nothing quite so out of season
i will bloom as big as you
then we come home
then we come home
then we come home
to baby blue
oh spooky ghost i need you most
then we come home to baby blue


(come to me
see me shake
set me free
things are bad
and I am down
it's nice to know you will always be around) 

Baby blue (re-upload)

Heyy besties, I'm not the real scruffpuppie but I keep upload songs by her :) 

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