Not where I said I would be,
It never got better for me

Somewhere between jumping and falling off
Rolling in the deep and struggling with withdrawal
Tryna tie loose ends, so there’s some way we could hang on
You take offense, and defend, nigga I was here from the start
Some niggas gave up, I gave them my all 
momma told me never regret something done from the heart
The world don’t revolve around you is what you said
I still have every word playing in my head
How you let him play you?
How I sit and watch as he play you?
Then have the nerve to say I loved you and claim you
Petty jit, too young in the head, selfish in the bed
Nothing more important than the bread 
I used to say that you’re the cause of this shit,
That you caused me this pain,
When all you did was live your life, And I’d trip
I used to blame you for the calls that you’d miss
Like I was still in the plans, who am I? To have claim
Before the start saw the end
Before the start saw the end baby
Before the start saw the end
Before the start saw the end baby

Not where they said I would be
It never got better for me
From where it all stems, one bad apple ain’t the root to the problem
Leave a trace behind and pray that they find it
My nigga I’m trying but these days I’m fighting I’m quiet 
The body that’s lifeless is smiling and hiding 
Inside 
Heard he died then but word is that they couldn’t find it


——————————————————————————————————————-

Written by Senna
Produced by Senna and Michael Decena

FINDit.

[Chorus]

Lines end, never clicked send,
"Why you thieving?", I'm just reaching out my hand,
Gave up on reasons to understand,
Why I'm everything you wanted in a man?
Life in growth, never chose to separate
Still the slightest hope, hoping that I never break
Constantly falling in love with the thought
Nearly forgot how to love what I got

[Verse]

Old bad habits, only seem new when it matters
but it don't (but it don't)
You notice and you take another note
Disregard it, garden full of snakes keep cutting,
When the long sleeves as long as the drapes,
The off season gone in a blink, 
where they gone? let them sink keep cutting,
I remember days you prayed for me and kept running
I remember days you prayed on me -it did nothing
Nothing but a word, not a text, not a verse, 
I’m not obsessed with a church
Being possessed by what hurts, look
Why you playing with my faith? I know that preacher banking
On my mind is “who am I?”, And suicide at stations
Only way to past the time, never going outside,
can’t get out of bed, cant get out of my head, I fall back
No hope how we coping, only see growth in doses
A steep slope when you’re me with a seam open

[Chorus]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Written and Produced by Senna


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

grow.

06/2019.

How you gon give up on me
Give up on me
Quicker than I did
I don’t like fighting
But the only time you fight
Is when you’re fighting with me
Got me fighting for me
That’s something that I would’ve never done
Something that I would’ve never done

You won’t let me in
Cause there’s clouds on me
Don’t put that on me
I’m not ike him
Your guard ain’t down for me
But you doubting me
Cause you think of him
So you put doubt on me

/voice note/

Senna

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