blushes and mascaras

nevermadeithome:

I don't even know what's happening 
your words come down like avalanche 
and I swear your tears hurt me more than you know 
and I'll be on my walk again covered in snow

I'm just a fuck up
for some reason you still find love in me
i guess its tough love
because I'm trying to figure out what you see in me 

I'm still waiting 
waiting waiting waiting 

I'm still waiting 
waiting waiting waiting 

areuhappy w me? cuz i kinda hate myself 
I cant communicate the right way, what I'm tryna say 
what I'm tryna say yeah
what I'm tryna say yeah
what I'm tryna say yeah
what I'm what I'm tryna say


sendflowrs:

can’t you hear what I'm tryna say
i buy a gem i fell in love with the finer things
and you won’t ever see my face at the pearly gates
love, it’s a funny thing
so I'm smokin on that gas till it go away 

like can you go away, no
I cannot hear a thing, woah
all this noise my darlin 
I don’t think ur listening, no
that song it curses me 
and I can hear you whistling, woah
swear that she’s a god at this
but I won’t ever say a thing, no

Spotify

are you, happy? w/ sendflowrs (irby & jolst)

prod/mix/master/art - fats'e

LYRICS
in the morning
u don't wanna be alone
and every night goes by real slow
i wish we weren't so far apart

and i wonder
if we fall off the edge
in the next world would we find each other

i just wanna be the one
u make me feel so numb
i just wanna be the one for you

i can't go on trying to hide
the way i feel for you
no more

in the evening
i just wanna call your phone
but I'm too scared you won't pick up
i'm scared ur with somebody else

one4u

love u all <3
vocals by harvest & @hammy
production by @memoryroseishere @gonetoofar @morgnbates & harvest
art/mix/master by harvest

spotify: https://open.spotify.com/track/6ivVlTzoSvE6xLDtLdHp6g?si=bcafbe00735c440c

lyrics:
(hamilton)
i watched our love die fast
i never knew bout that
i saw it all turn bad
now i don’t want you back

woke up and my mind is spinning
woke up and the whole world’s ending
still searching to feel something
still feeling like i’m nothing

got a spark in my heart
i got smoke in my lungs
should’ve known from the start
you were never the one

im not the one that you want
why you put up a front
playing me like im dumb
make me feel like a dub

baby im done
yeah im movin on
you can call my phone
but i’m already gone

yeah im already ghost
i can’t let you close
no i don’t know
so my heart stay closed
no i don’t know
i just can’t tell
fucked up in the head
i can’t trust
one minute im cool
then the next im manic
crushing scripts up
under plastic

rolling spliffs up
i can’t feel shit
when i can’t think
that’s my favorite
when you kissed me
i just lost it
wishing i could’ve told
what it costed

(harvest & hamilton)
i watched our love die fast
i never knew bout that
i saw it all turn bad
now i don’t want you back

woke up and my mind is spinning
woke up and the whole world’s ending
still searching to feel something
still feeling like i’m nothing

(harvest)
you don’t even know what happened
I don’t want to fix it all
seeing through our glass it’s cracking 
hourglass, not filled at all

ill never know your passions
cause we’re in a late stage, we’re in a late stage 
i’m breaking down i’m crashing
not on the same page, not on the same page

i want you to be here, a main stay 
one day I wanna play on the main stage 
it’s just the same shit, said a different way
I’ll cough it up, I’m feeling grey 

i want to be in the nosebleed, know me, everything is better when you hold me
or scold me
im slowly 
finding somewhere to hide like brody

knowing that you’ll never know me gives me piece of mind 
i hope you know im lonely like all of the time

i start to realise that I won’t come to my senses
I hope when I leave this place I go on to the next thing

never knew feat. hamilton (prod. memoryrose, toofargone, homesick & harvest)

hold the applause
produced by @prodbybrody
featuring @sewerperson
mixed by nine to 5 and sewerperson

lyrics:
both:
so won't you hold the applause
cause its all that i got
i know its not a lot, but it feeds me the strength that i would need to move on

nine to 5:
I did all the things that i said i would
Try to push me to the side but you never could no
I’m breaking through the walls it’s competitive
Now im taking to the bottle like a sedative woah

After all of this time and i still get it wrong
I won’t tell you what you wanted hear no more
Yeah you played me a game tryna get up the score
But i aint finished yet i’m still coming for more

So won’t you hold the applause
Cuz its all that i got
You tore it apart
It was doomed from the start
Fallin for your mirage 

Falling from nothing
But oh its so exciting
To go
To these places i aint been before
You took hold my body sunk it into the floor

going insane, my body is sore
i feel a lot different than i did before
seasons have changed, i'm closing these doors
i'm burning these bridges can't take anymore
so take all i am, i'll do what i can
but nothing will satisfy you in the end
but i understand, it's all gone as planned
you fucked up my head but i'll take what i can

sewerperson:
Seventeen nights in the grip of cold hands
Baby i try do u right while u just doing what u can
Wails heard thru the night from somewhere deep inside the branch
Toss out a flare we can light up the world
Ash floats thru the air as this fire unfurls
Tell me how this shit compare to a night better spent
Watch The banshee touch down on to the charring grasslands

Won’t you hold the applause
Cause its all that I got
I know its not a lot but it feeds me the strength I would need to move on
With her taste on my tongue
And my hand on my heart
I cant be what u need but I swear on my life I will be what u want
With the grace of a wisp
She comes right around and attaches to my hip
She whispers are u scared and I said maybe just a bit
U know I cant lie when u look at me like this
When u look me in my eyes
I know u could see into my soul into my mind
U know I know I could never get away with lying
That’s why its the truth that without u id rather die

listen on spotify!

nine to 5 - hold the applause ft. sewerperson (prod. brody)

What if airplanes were joints in the night sky? 🌿✨
This cannabis-inspired remix of the classic track brings hazy vibes, dreamy hooks, and stoner storytelling. Roll one up and let the smoke take you higher.

Airplanes

things will never be the same.

<a href='https://theartistunion.com/tracks/2c0ba6'>download here</a>

lyrics:
if you could just

understand whats in my head
im lost forever ive been mislead
ive lived ive died and i have bled
for all the words ive left unsaid

memories they cloud my mind
all of the people i left behind
at least i can say that i tried
its not my fault now let it die

if i left this place without a trace
no one could even recognize my face
why do i feel like a fucking disgrace
lay me to rest and cover my grave
 
i cannot feel
im only good at hiding and im
glad that you remind me of the
things i left behind me

this bed
that i lay in
only holds me back
and these walls just cant protect me
youre not the only one who left me 
[all alone]

why do i push away the 
people who stood by me
things are different now im better
at least thats what i like to tell myself

take my word
i know it hurts
forgive yourself
let it go



fade to black

Just a little something we were working on and never released :)

Cover of "If It Means A Lot To You" by A Day To Remember 
Guitar and Mixing by Shinigami
Recorded in 2017

shinigami + shy - If It Means A Lot To You (Acoustic Cover)

i miss u w/ yungjzaisdead

My heads against the wall again
And I don’t bother
Checking on my phone at all
Don’t wanna try love again
Cuz the scars run too deep
And I can’t ever sleep as it is

You have your new friends
And I’m happy for that
Got ur whole life ahead
Hope it’s good, I’ll be glad
And lately I just stare
And reflect on my past
Wonder how my life
Got So far off the tracks

Blade against my wrist again
And it’s been harder
Trying to be sober at all
The future makes me scared as shit
Cuz the past fucked me up
And I think I’m just better alone

Isolate myself again
And I don’t bother
Trying to get better at all
It’s just a lie I tell my friends
So they don’t have to fret
Til I’m laid down to rest
At the end

head vs. wall

i been off the drugs
for the whole night
pain it cuts me up
till the sunlight
i can't go to sleep
can't shut my eyes
fuck is wrong with me
feel so numb inside
what the fuck is wrong with me
i can't find my inner peace
i been lost all nineteen years
just fuck me up and let me bleed

yeah baby pour me up
i don't wanna feel anything no more
i just wanna lie down maybe smoke some weed in my room
let my demons in through the door
i know i'm a fuck up
i know i'm a waste
i know you don't ever wanna see my fucking face
and maybe it'll stay that way forever 
maybe imma drown in this rainy weather girl
keep my heart sitting beside your bed
let me in your dreams, let me in your head
you were my angel but lately you've been turning red
i've been feeling empty bout everything i'm alive but i'm still dead

wtf is wrong with me (prod. jakkyboi)

convolk - A Million Messages; No Response [prod. deject]

planet blackstar (prod. irby)

fall against your wall (prod.irby)

a place where i belong pt 2 (feat. supachefm)

@ilyaxhes
@odece
@kkkarasu
lyrics

Intro
you can waste it all on me 
I can’t upset you don’t put this on me 

verse
this is not a memory 
no need to take a listen 
always bitchin when she’s sad 
said i don’t pay attention 
she’s playin with the past you know 
Always goin right back for you 

Chorus
I don’t like the way you look at me 
and it’s hard to say you still care for me 
it’s not like you to run away 
was it something i had to sayx2

ashes. verse
I don’t wanna talk 
shawty please don’t speak 
I’m so sick of singin all these loves songs 
she’s always on my mind 
Each n everyday 
I rlly need to go to bed



Verse2
I don’t wanna stress bout shit you say 
I could care less bout the things you say 
it’s always too much and it’s never enough 
you’ve wasted my time and you’re losin your touch 


Chorus
I don’t like the way you look at me 
and it’s hard to say you still care for me 
it’s not like you to run away 
was it something i had to sayx2

her pretty lies

her pretty lies (feat. ashes.) [Prod. Odece + karusa]

i am not shinigami, just a fan
reuploading songs w original covers and titles
enjoy :)

a place where i belong pt 2 (feat. supachefm)

shinigami archive

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