your sudden mind
quick with the daggers
there ain't nothing to me
but an empty stage

and everyone I knew or met
they're holding onto
thin handfuls of my hair

in the water I am
lighter than your feathers
floating by as naked 
as the day I was born

in the tumult of your clean body
there are road signs leading me back home

Naked With Daggers

fall to my knees
in the green fields 
where we fucked

rest in my head
on the long heels 
of your thoughts

wait for the bus
in the dim cold
of the dawn

suck on my lips
while I follow trails
you have gone

all of my friends
left me drinking pabst 
by the road

they are making their rounds
through the frost and needles
of their codes

against the shore
the water is quivering
round your thighs

our time has past
I am chasing the currents
in your eyes

will you marry him?
will you marry him?

Absence (Will you marry him?)

I've been wandering the riverside
Kicking stones into the angry tide.

I can't. I can't. I can't.

I've been wading in the shallows there
Watching sunlight glancing through your hair
I've been quiet in the falling rain
Hoping someone blind will see my pain.

I can't I can't I can't x2

In the ripples where your cheeks are stained
In the bedroom where are sheets are laid

I can't I can't I can't x2

In the morning when my feet are cold
In the future where our kids grow old
I'll take the desert and its sweeping heat
I'll take the caves where the prophets sleep.

I can't I can't I can't x2

Tributary (I can't)

I wrote and recorded this song 6 years ago. Maybe I was better then. Enjoy.

And what wind I follow
I crawl on my knees
Child that I love
If love is as it pleases
What have you been
I have been looking for
What have you lost
You cant have anymore?

All around me people dropping like flies
Like flies in a window, Emily said
Like flies in a window, Emily said

And I am tying ties for a funeral
How my mind has grown numb and dull
x2

Each breath I take, I know I want more
And each image reflects you on the floor
Child I repress, my love will just grow
Through each day I wave off I flow

And people around me are dropping like flies
Like flies in a window, Emily said x3

Tying Ties For A Funeral (Emily Dickinson)

I’m all cut up and my mind is on fire
You know you’re right when you say “Shit. You look tired.”
In the grainy dark I’ve been writing for hours
Kicking thoughts like buckets of flowers

But I’m going away and I can’t look back
This town is drifting by the railroad track
And I won’t sleep until it’s cold and black
And the distance has extinguished everything I lack

I can’t outrun it but I sure got to try
I’m dried up on tears and I’m fucking high
They say the people you meet change your soul
Well I’ve been meeting lots of friendly black holes.


Friendly Black Holes (nsfw) 12/3

Laying in the soft palm of your hands
Resting on your ribs where your heart jumps again
Lifting up your shirt, stretched like a stem
Counting every yellow hair on your head

I’ve been getting older, there is no doubt
No one ever calls or ventures out
I’ve been holding petals, you left in my bed
Counting off the lovers I cannot forget

I’ve been making money, as they say that I must
Layering my deficit of distrust
You don’t call me honey, words sting in my mouth
You’re reading dusty volumes between the shelves

I thought you might love me, no one can
My strings are all tangled up in their hands
I was sure you would hold me, my body a doll
Someone pulls my head off and it rolls down the hall

And love’s sickly syrup you lick with your tongue
Over before it started and sweet til it’s gone.
How was I so selfish, I dreamt in tomb
Making a new nest, only for you.


Honey and Strings

Photo Credit: Emily Crooks


Lyrics:

Cold morning, I’m awake. You’re not up yet
Wandering round the dark apartment

Those things that we said when we were drunk
Bob around our heads still unsunk

A pane of glass you touched with your breath
I’m pressing against dancing ice that you left

In my dreams I’m filled with happiness 
I wake up in the sweat of my distress

The stubborn needle pricks my broken lungs
Drowned in the cigarettes and empty songs


Winter Lungs

My first collaboration with my talented brother Cody (DJsyn)! 

Lyrics:

Here, on white mountainsides
I’m looking into the pit of your eyes
Have I been wise?
Have I been tired?
Have I been myself?
Have I been wired?

Now, that you’ve gone away
I’ve got nothing left to fear
It’s just your voice,
Ringing in my ears
Have I been wrong?
Have I been dumb?
Have I any hope?


Have I Been Myself?

For L.

Lyrics:

Homesick Remedies (Roman Candles)

Somethings don’t come easy
I’m not used to someone being near to me
And I can’t see the forest clearly
Strip me bare, make me want this disease

Something is changing inside me
I was high on a cloud of apathy
But I feel your hands all around me
Full and sweet in the glow of sympathy

You are art against my windowsill,
Painted red, turning circles in my mind
Haven’t swept the dust off in a while
And I confess, I’m scared of what I’ll find

I had dreams of you every night this week
I’m on a raft in an enormous sea
Living through sparks in a vacant memory
Pulling oars through the sea

Somethings might confound me
I was surprised by your lovely company
But then I feel the waters drowning me
Slow and sure as some homesick remedy

Tell me the secrets that you keep
Keep me warm, keep me tired, in that longing
Wrap me up in that peaceful kind of sleep
Where I hear your heartbeat sounding

I had dreams of you every night this week
I’m on a raft in an enormous sea
Living through sparks in a vacant memory
Pulling oars through the sea


O Beautiful! Imperfect!