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This Appointed Love

AXAXC – DEREALIZATION (FULL ALBUM)
🧠 A sonic descent into addiction, masculinity, mental collapse, and identity death.
🕳 Trapcore • Deathcore • Nu Metal • Screamo • Ambient Sludgecore

“This cell doesn’t have four walls. It has my face.”

DEREALIZATION isn’t just an album — it’s a mental event. A full-body confrontation with trauma, weed addiction, spiritual despair, fractured masculinity, and the mask of perfection.
It’s about waking up in your own life… and realizing you don’t recognize yourself.

This record is the culmination of every psychological arc from previous AXAXC albums.
Legacy tracks like “Perfect”, “Tongues of Sin”, and the remastered “End of the Line” find new meaning here — not as isolated songs, but as symptoms in a larger mental breakdown.

🧠 THEMATIC ARC:
Tracks 1–5: The high. The mask. The beginning of collapse.

Tracks 6–9: Duality of identity. Cracks in the mirror. Begging to be seen.

Tracks 10–13: Shame, sin, and spiritual erosion.

Tracks 14–17: Total breakdown → false salvation → reluctant acceptance → final breath.

🔁 LEGACY TRACKS [Derealization Cuts]:
- The Nail in the Coffin
- Perfect
- Tongues of Sin
- TABOO [Remastered – Derealization Cut]
- God is a Woman (And She's Ashamed of Me)
- The Devil Said I'm Okay
- End of The Line [Remastered – Derealization Cut]

These were written long ago, but they always belonged here.
This is where their meaning finally lands.

🩸 HIGHLIGHT TRACKS:
I Am Already Dead [Alpha v.1 & Beta v.1]: The breaking point of addiction and the fracturing of self.

- Walking Dead (P1 & P2): A weed high as synthetic salvation — until the crash. 
- Prison: A scream for release from a self-built cage.
- The Mirror Lies: Rage against the curated persona you’ve become.
- God is a Woman(And She's Ashamed Of Me): The shame of spiritual failure and feminine rejection.

💀 AUTHOR’S NOTE:
“I don't want to be here anymore — but I built this version of me for you.
The man made perfect.
The man made empty.”

This is a neurodivergent death spiral in audio form.
If you’ve ever felt broken trying to be strong…
If you’ve ever loved the high more than yourself…
If you’ve ever built a mask so strong you forgot your real face underneath…
This album is your mirror.

🔥 RECOMMENDED IF YOU LIKE:
#Slipknot • #Korn • #SleepToken • #Nothing,Nowhere. • #BreakingBenjamin • #SlaughtertoPrevail • #Loathe • #FallinginReverse

DISTORT. DISTRUST. DESTROY.
#AXAXC
#Derealization #MentalHealth #Neurodivergent #WeedAddiction #MalePressure
#Deathcore #Trapcore #NuMetal #Screamo #SoundCloudMetal
#NewMusic #EmotionalBreakdown #DarkMusic #Recovery #Trauma

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