Awe man dear R.I.P my brother & good friend I hear a voice like yours and complete emotion hits me hard I miss u 💕💕💕😩😩🎶🎶🥺🥺

My Mix

prod by me and soundcloud.com/cay2o

shoutout to soundcloud.com/heylog , soundcloud.com/nothomex , and soundcloud.com/lilskeleskrrt for hoppin on this with me they're all goated and rly cool ppl show love to them if u arent already

hope u all enjoy :)

lyrics:

me:
i dont think I can keep on livin like shit
close my eyes, feel the tension 
im stressin bout it 
cause no ones the same, and I cant feel nothin 
im feelin strange, but I cant care cus its nothin 

please dont leave yet, I can see you frown when im bleedin.
please ima be there, anytime u need me ill be close so u can see me 

heylog:
everyday i'm feelin awful
6 feet, horizontal
i recommend u give me space
cause i'm close to hostile
she compliment me on my eyes
said, "i love the way they sparkle"
i'm lookin like some trash
while she's looking like a model
i want you
ur irish changes from green to blue
i love you
but why u gotta leave so soon

not home. :
they told me im too gone 
green packed in a new bong
I told her put her bra on, I wont be here too long 
left your thraxx in a baggy
bad bitch ripped jeans, cincinnati 
im your boy so call me shaggy
at the house now her lips speakin nasty

skele:
go ahead and just leave now
won't be here when i break down
keep cutting me i wont feel it
but i love when you bring the knife out
n babe i think that u ruin me 
not numb but god how i wanna be
look in my eyes if you want i feel the blood in the back of my tongue
say love, 
i really think you're a bad one
i think you like how my hearts gone
i think you just wanna have fun 
play around till it kills me 
till i hang from my ceiling 
getting close to no feeling
will u stay here if im willing

ima be there

spotify

ima be there w/heylog, residential, & skele

@kennedysucks
@killmesumday
@sewerperson
@user-551713846

witch hotel & sewerperson - sirens w/ kennedyxoxo & killmesumday (prod. noahmadethiss x jolst)

co produced w @speedlmt

lyric

i don't wanna die but i don't wanna try
when your not here w me i get a teary eye
my dreams are lucid, they gonna get you 
how can i prove it, that your the issue 

i got these tissues, oh fuck i miss u
will you be here soon so i can kiss u
i can't stop shaking im forever breaking
i know you like that, its never changing::(

decomposing in the mirror posing 
spooky black my father:3 stop diagnosing 
why do i bother, im controlling, im the victim. forever rolling;

a sob sandwich its kinda adequate
let me swallow it, these my bandages
songs just foru cos i said it is !
of grams not sedatives, dont know what day it is:(
pop another sedative?

i got these tissues, oh fuck i miss u
will you be here soon so i can kiss u
i can't stop shaking im forever breaking
i know you like that, its never changing::(

I DON'T WANNA DIE BUT I DON'T WANNA TRY
WHEN YOUR NOT HERE W ME I GET A TEARY EYE
MY DREAMS ARE LUCID, THEY GONNA GET YOU 
HOW CAN I PROVE IT, THAT YOUR THE ISSUE 
I GOT THESE TISSUES, OH FUCK I MISS U
WILL YOU BE HERE SOON SO I CAN KISS U
I CAN'T STOP SHAKING IM FOREVER BREAKING
I KNOW YOU LIKE THAT, ITS NEVER CHANGING

pine

produced by caves : )

were u being sincere when you calling me
everynight for a few months you were onto me
its getting too much when you leave
why'd you make it so hard just to breathe
i blame it on you but i think it was me
i knew you would go but i thought we would speak
just stay get rid of my fears
the last thing id say is that i love you dear
your head on my bed im holding you near

im nervous another year you look over
you're perfect i need to let go of her
but i cant but i cant wish i could but i cant
but i cant cos i loved her

id kiss on your neck but it brings it my tears
stay right here get rid of my fears
i cant even say your name
no way your happy being mine
touch my neck im getting shivers down my spine
not getting better but i tell everyone im fine
i think that you would be happy when i die
i want it end it all when i see him lie
i wanna hurt him bad if you cry
all i ever had was the sky
now its all bad when you fly
im really not glad your my ally

im nervous another year you look over
you're perfect i need to let go of her
but i cant but i cant wish i could but i cant
but i cant cos i loved her

now your just a name on my phone

nervous

produced by me ^^ <3

Follow Sinxi:

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/heysinxi
Twitter - https://twitter.com/heysinxi
Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/artist/7gPvslUym7gEDxebPSkGkZ?si=TKwVnxuwSl62lIoNuB5DLA&dl_branch=1

Follow @heylog:

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/byelog
Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/artist/5Jf6pl4SGgueZHZ4pC313c?si=69jszObsTqiSHWU4S16WsQ

Lyrics -
i just don't understand
i left it in your hands
you left my heart tainted, don't know where i am
but i ain't fuckin' healed yet
but you act like you don't see it

you don't deserve the praise
you didn't wanna change
you gave it all up for a little bit of fame
and i just don't wanna feel shit

i just don't really need this, no

late calls
i didn't wanna text you
too long
that i didn't really see you
won't lie yeah, i've changed a lot
spent the summer with myself and all of my thoughts
bring another bottle
i could really use one
but it's something that i never really talk about
never really saw the same
never really felt the pain

i just don't understand
i left it in your hands
you left my heart tainted, don't know where i am
but i ain't fuckin' healed yet
but you act like you don't see it

you don't deserve the praise
you didn't wanna change
you gave it all up for a little bit of fame
and i just don't wanna feel shit

i just don't really need this, no

i just watch u cry
you do it all the time
i'm here cause i like you
it ain't a lie
focus how to breathe
i need u for some venting
look at me i'm worth
more than i really think
knock me down until it hurts
i'm omw to brink
i'm omw to edge
i'm omw to learn
i'm omw to death 
i don't wanna make this turn, no
i don't wanna make this turn
i don't wanna hit the dirt
i don't wanna make it worse

i just don't understand
i left it in your hands
you left my heart tainted, don't know where i am
but i ain't fuckin' healed yet
but you act like you don't see it

you don't deserve the praise
you didn't wanna change
you gave it all up for a little bit of fame
and i just don't wanna feel shit

i just don't really need this, no

late calls (feat. heylog)

featuring @user-411557229
produced by heylog

lyrics:
(heylog)
the veins in my skin pop out when i'm warm
i handle a blade and point to my arm
oh she'd be upset if i put it through
i'll put it away but only for u
well this time u won, you proud of yourself
i put us down, no need to be held
i've suffered too long in my mental state
i'm harming myself, does it look like i'm okay
i said u were right
and i'm sorry just know i'm not bright
or the smartest, keep beating my eyes
till they're blue and to where i can't see
now they're swollen, i'm blind in my view
and now everyday feel like i lose
but i'm trying to cope without u
and it's hard oh baby it's hard
so wish me ur luck and ur regards

it drips from my forearm to my shirt
watching the blood fall is the worst
ignore all of your calls cus i've learned
i made it a full year without her
I LISTEN TO NONSENSE ON A BASIS
IT'S ALL IN MY HEAD AND IT'S MY FAVORITE
I KEPT THEM AROUND FOR ENTERTAINMENT
I CHOOSE TO STAY PRIVATE AND FACELESS
DON'T TEXT ME
DON'T CALL ME
I'VE WITNESS AUTOPSY
DON'T COME HOME
I WON'T BE HERE
I LEFT SO IT'S SINCERE
a lots on my mind
like my future and maybe a wife
and i wonder if music's my prize
it's the only thing going for me
been a week since i've gone outside
i'm pathetic it sums up my life
forgot her and god it's about time
and something that i can't help but think
if ur disappointed in me

(residential)
tell me what you find
deep inside her eyes
cause she used to be kind
until she lost her mind

blade in the basement
i'm high but i'm anxious
snapping back the hat when i am next in the rotation
thought i found myself, but i'm in dissociation
love being alone, but i don't fuck with isolation

quarter ounce
pack it up and take me out
you said i’d be better now
but all i got are pills around

where the fuck you’ve been at
you left your nail marks on my back
now i'm going too fast
but i can't help but think about the past
i just smoked what was left in the bag
and i really don't mind if i crash

pathetic ft. residential

just a vent, very drunk rn 
shoutout my brother @jolst on the production



tell me baby does he write you songs? 
blood all on my pillow when i wake up shit is wrong
i been takin 30’s got me itchin i can’t stop 
every time i think i got a hit it start to flop
i wish that i never saw those numbers from the start 
try not to let it bug me but i can’t lie it hurt my heart
i spill my soul on the mic n go smoke a dart 
shoutout to big veins we just alike in that regard 

everybody write bout doin drugs, it’s ok
but u ain’t ever threw up in ur sleep it burn ur lungs
i been sippin lean for 4 days babe im havin fun, ay
feel my heart beatin in my chest i’m dying young
and words are powerful theyll kill u like a gun 
watch the shit u speak cus ur whole life it becomes
people love to talk their shit but watch em when i run
when i fly to USA im landin with a punch 

i got G.E.R.D
regurgitation ): 
might pop a 40
and float away and
can’t stand you phonies
so go away yea
got good friends round me
but they won’t stay, yea 
and i’m used to that 
always been the same 
since a small boy i been
always filled with hate 
but i love my momma 
and i love my dad :)
and i’m thankful daily
for the shit i have 

maybe life is okay
maybe it’s not that bad 
i got someone who loves me
can’t argue with that <3 
i still get so fucked up
til i can’t call a cab 
i been tryna love myself 
but i don’t love me back 
i still wake everyday 
with shit on my shoulders i’m a heavyweight
get away
from all the negative things i always say 
fill the page
with shit i would think but i would never say
care+ in my drink 
but i been tryna get in better shape 

i can’t even think yea 
baby i’m just sitting here recording with a drink yea 
shoutout to the gang 
that’s double L all on my krink yeah 
shoutout to the goat jolst 
can’t wait till we link yeah <3 (love u bro) 

n i still wear a hoodie 
even when it’s hot
pull it over my face
so u can’t see me rot
baby take your hood down
girl i’m self conscious
everybody talkin money $$$
don’t know what a job is 

i guess this is what they call 
a r- release 
i just love you all so much 
that i can’t even speak
i feel fuckin worthless
but you’re all helping me
this one for the soundcloud
ima go to sleep … 

(love u all bro i get a lil soppy when i am drunk sorry )

maybe its not that bad (jolst)

produced by sleepwater leftquiet and heylog
w @heylog

im losing faith and abilities
i wish i was brave im never at ease
what did you say to me
nothing was made for me
nothing went the way of the willow
ill sit right here and wait by my window

picking leaves for you to see
i hate these trees when i cant breathe
im sick of me i said too much
i hate myself not scared to crush
im not scared to crush
i hate myself
not fair no touch
i did this to myself

come destroy me now i rlly wanna know
i locked inside your arms
i hate the way it goes
im locked inside a farm 
while u remove his coat
ive never had the time 
to let anyone close

heylog:
just a log and a tree standing open in fields
rough times for a being if u don't know how to heal
kill me lover, push below the ground
oh i can't stand it here, not even an ounce
oh you
oh my
come back
to my side
i dont know myself
dont go ill stay and get help

no i dont miss you
hate what u done to me
say that your in love me
200 hundred days
where i would see you
i made a mistake
now i cant see you

fields w/heylog

𝐢𝐥𝐲 𝐛𝐫𝐲𝐬𝐨𝐧<3

𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚣𝚞𝚔𝚎𝚜𝚊.
come around
ik im a fuck up jus a let down
but we could run away my love, from this town<3
gaze inside her eyes been filled w/ hate now
need 2 stay down
really need sum backup
u know ur the only one i want luv
cant fkn take this aching make my chest numb
you the one i want luv

𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚒𝚍𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚊𝚕.
cant even snap back 2 this snapchat
got 80 ounce in this backpack
making lame shit on this old mac
while my friends out in their pontiac
how are you so contagious
holding back on my anguish
'cardi rocks when im anxious
blood n mud on these pages
she dont talk but her eyes flirt
louis v n that black skirt
pulling up in that chrysler
bloody shirt n my chest hurts

𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚣𝚞𝚔𝚎𝚜𝚊. 𝚡 𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚒𝚍𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚊𝚕.
come around
ik im a fuck up jus a let down
but we could run away my love, from this town<3
gaze inside her eyes been filled w/ hate now
need 2 stay down
really need sum backup
u know ur the only one i want luv
cant fkn take this aching make my chest numb
you the one i want luv

ep w/ bry soon also~ if you've read this far then thank you all sm for all of the support this past year, and just in general if you listen to any of my stuff. it genuinely means the whole world. ily all sm<3

follow spotify!

let_down w/ residential. (ushanka boy)

produced by speedlmt

lyrics:
before i found u
i was going through hell
oh do you miss me
im still going through hell
i still cant even tell
what its like to be me
she doesent miss me
she doesent miss me


i vanish i go into hibernation
crucify me its isolation
no one will find me 
lost in the pine trees
walk right by me hallucinations
i vanish i go into hibernation
crucify me its isolation
no one will find me 
lost in the pine trees
walk right by me hallucinations

she my bandage
walking through the forest empty handed
blood on my screen
with dirt on my shoes
where have you been
i sorta miss you
well no defiently do 
im shaking in my room
i really hate this house
im shaking in my room
i need a way out
im shaking in my room
im shaking in my room
shaking in my room

i vanish i go into hibernation
crucify me its isolation
no one will find me 
lost in the pine trees
walk right by me hallucinations
i vanish i go into hibernation
crucify me its isolation
no one will find me 
lost in the pine trees
walk right by me hallucinations

isolation

6.
prod. awfuldrama

I’m anxious, so I’m sorry for saying sorry uh
You fake it like nobody, like nobody does
Set the pace then, when you climb on, when you ride on top
Make it painless, when you fuck me, when you fuck me up

Cause it’s the inevitable that you’ll leave
No one seems to stay with me
Pessimistic, I know
Just realistic that’s how it goes
Could you call me before I get the wrong idea
Cause I’m stressing with you not right here

I’m anxious, so I’m sorry for saying sorry uh
You fake it like nobody, like nobody does
Set the pace then, when you climb on, when you ride on top
Make it painless, when you fuck me, when you fuck me up

sorry for saying sorry

3. 
prod. sinxi & oc

Everyday is starting to feel the same
I feel like I’m starting to lose my face
When you call, I’m there
When I call you’re not
My life’s in standstill
Like I’m stuck in a rut

And it all just repeats on loop
The same damn day
Said you’d call that wasn’t the truth
I hate the games you play 
And nothing is changing, my feelings grew faded
I’m not good with patience, so don’t keep my waiting
I’m out of creation, my thoughts running vacant
I’m sick of disgracing the people who made me

A state of decay
Leaves me rotting away
It’s hard to retain 
All that sense you’ll replace
What matters the most 
When I’ve been here with scorn
Your face can convey when your pushed to the wall

And it all just repeats on loop
The same damn day
Said you’d call that wasn’t the truth
I hate the games you play 
And nothing is changing my feelings grew faded
I’m not good with patience, so don’t keep my waiting
I’m out of creation, my thoughts running vacant
I’m sick of disgracing the people who made me

groundhog day w/ sinxi

FACEDOWN

lyrics ⬇️

when you call me
i wont pick it up
you should know this
yea you shoukd know this
and im not sorry
you shoulda noticed
i was there for you yea i swear i was closest

look how the flow switch
i know that they gon love it
thought everything was picture perfect until
you had broke it
you broke it
now i can’t even focus
not inside of my room or when im at work but im hoping

wonder when ill get outta my head out my headspace
im locked inside my skin when i scream they dont hear me
so whats the reason i should be here clearly
i shouldn’t
i know its not alright but ima keep it keep it pushing
and i dont wanna lie but i been doing what I shouldn’t 

they dont wanna see me happy but im chillin here im grinnin
i dont wanna see you they think that im crappy im a villain
maybe that is true
but i refuse to see that vision 
i dont wanna lose my hope if i dont have to

i got bad news
you wont see me no more ima be way past you

should i (hostile)

produced by heylog

lyrics:
time will tell
pick the gun up and shoot in the head (in gta)
don't worry
you don't have to get by playing pretend
tried to be nice 
but i ended up losing friends
i disappeared and don't ever wanna talk again

driving on the freeway
the same one i saw that look on your face
you told my boy it's been hard to reach me
"talking to log isn't easy"
stop tryna get me to hangout
without you i've picked up the pace now
just go ahead
select all, delete it
i'm done and i'm leaving
been a while, i wonder if you'd recognize me
always thought what we had was strong as concrete
spoke too soon and i shoulda moved on way long ago
don't know you and i can't believe we used to be close
tempted to pick the gun up and shoot him in the head (in gta)
at the time all i wanted was for you to be dead
stupid bitch, you don't wanna live life playing pretend
don't be asking for guidance or for a hand to lend
swear it felt like yesterday
i don't recognize this place
it sucks that shit's permanent
and that scar won't go away
it don't matter where you are
at your house or in your car
i'm stuck there next to your hip
your fault you took it too far

pine

sleepwater

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