what with em beat waits? THIS IS A BANGER THOUGH?

This is beautiful, and has such a wonderful meaning. I will start playing this for my yoga class, the kids will love it. Love from India! ❤️

LYRICS

D.B. Cooper:
I’ve got a verse here, so for my opening
I request a cigarette, as I’m about to smoke this kid
You’ve got windows making your crew all head to depression
I’ve got Bond-style escape plans; 00-727
D.B. Cooper, I drop bombs a plenty 
against T.V. bloopers, average emcees
This washup would fit with the rest of my bundles of dollars
Know that I go for the throat, remind you of your father?

Dead Bart:
Were you trying to impress me? You should know I’m good at breakthroughs
I’m jumpin’ on this beat like it was your escape route
This dude couldn’t even see the better choice for a main ‘chute
So I’ll be eating up this track like “what’s the deal with airplane food?”
I left Matt Groening crying when he read up on my story
You left the plane when the flight got a little too boring
And I thought I was the sitcom, but when I look at this loser
He looks less like Dan and more like Sheldon Cooper
Facin’ off with Dead Bart, now your heartbeat might stop
This sketch’s sketchy headshot went up for a high cost
But your body’s most likely outlined with white chalk
Now FOX’s best son’s stealing Zodiac Earhart’s time slot
You hit the runway and still, no one knows what your name is
I hit the runway and my face instantly became famous
Even with a rainstorm, I still got colder bars in this fight
So take your leave and take a leap into the dark of the night

D.B. Cooper:
I thought the Simpsons’ could drop bars, but it’s clear you can’t battle me
When your rapping’s more barebones than your family
And you wrote down all the tropes you decided to ride on
Then turned the creepypasta genre to the Squidward Suicide Squad
Keep this bank noted as I’m crushing this duel
Even my blank motive has more substance than you
Leave the tank loaded and get the show on the road
And when I’m flowing, know that I’m holding a grudge in this feud
The Nightmare at 20,000 Feet, towering over your treehouse
Thinking this D.B. beef is gonna leave me beat? How?
I’m hijacking this win, as you’re left shaking and crying 
Leaving you like my legacy - radio silent

Dead Bart:
Traveling on Northwest, yet your plan still went south
Go eat my shorts, man, open the stairwell and step out
And make like your exit and drop this fight
Chalk your loss up as another prediction we’ve gotten right

CREDITS 

Swizkii as D.B. Cooper
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCs4l43CoLWyUMdaWq9S_SKA
Shimario as Dead Bart
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCsFyrvAhPhiEvJ1yL_Ux8MQ

Written by Rabi
Mixed and mastered by Freshy Kanal
https://soundcloud.com/freshy-kanal
Beat by Insanebeatz
Dead Bart art by 01Tyler10
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCrIDPJLlnUFILYuS72fIc1g
Thumbnail by Rabi

D.B. Cooper vs. Dead Bart - Rap Battle

Ready for Round Two?
Spidey Fam as Sonic.exe
Mancha as Squidward's Suicide
Beat produced by Tantu
Beat mixed by GlitchDude
Written by Trakked
Additional help by M!CAH, Nooby, Candyman, M&Mattie, Worms, Snakebite126 and QuickDissa
Mixed by Jort
Thumbnail by Jort
Art by Trakked

Battle:

Sonic.exe:
ACT ONE: I’m the guy that drives readers to madness
YOU CAN’T RUN, hell, you can’t even get off your mattress
How do you expect to win if you act like you live
Under the BLACK SUN, stop acting like your life's been so tragic
Yeah, you should begin to bow, on the ‘net I’m infamous
Get a soul and rip it out, they know fun is infinite 
You think that you’re different, now? You know death is imminent.
Suicide, I won’t allow. You don’t get that privilege.
And I will say, it’s brave that you went to perform on stage
But they’d much rather cave their faces in than hear you for a day
But I’ll help you before you crack under pressure again
Your episode and soul are lost; come and play with me, friend..

Squidward’s Suicide:
I’d like to play you a song. Sit down and listen.
I’m disappointed with all the shots that you’re missing.
And you’re attempting to escape from the cartridge that bottles you?
Note to evade the Minors while you’re suffering in Solitude
Your Hopes and Dreams have been buried since your beginning
You cheat at every game you play, yet there is emptiness in winning.
And like me, you’ve degraded to a shell of yourself
Sonic can't handle ocean flow, so I'll drench you as well

Sonic.exe:
Oh, what's wrong, Squidward? Am I getting in your head?
You know that your neighbors hate you and would rather have you dead
Wouldn't you agree that you've been soft with your lines, friend?
You may have some more disses, but you've so little time left…
Let’s play Hide and Seek, you’re behind that ego and tryna be something quite unique
But your lines are weak and your life is bleaker; don’t cry to me, now it’s time to see 
You are merely a toy on my shelf to play with, I’ll shred you and tear you and rip your face, then
Blast your head to Red Mist, like the dead kids, what do you expect when you play with Satan?
DO IT. Now that you’ve seen the terror I have wrought,
A hopeless soul will burn forever knowing I Am God.

Squidward’s Suicide:
Why do you keep trying? I can’t take any more of this…
You take your only friends and leave them like the tortured kids
We’re both failures, yet you have no excuse.
Grab the strings you pull to hang yourself and prove yourself some use.
You try and try to hide them yet your flaws aren’t so hard to see
Since you and Sally couldn’t make a perfect harmony
You hunted Amy down to stop her from breaking your heart
But try to take apart my frames, and you’ll end up taken apart.
No more games. No more tricks, and I will never be your friend.
Your files are executable, so now you face the end.
You think you’re some eldritch deity inside a franchise
You're not a god, all 8-bits of your frames have died
Your reality exists within a cell
I'll pull the plug on your computer, then see you in Hell.

Sonic.exe vs Squidward's Suicide - Rap Cypher #40

GABBER

YDGeon as Thomas Edison
ArnoldVA as Christopher Columbus
AbsoluteOni as Announcer

Written by 723freaky
Additional Writing Help by Ian Sparrow
Produced by 723freaky
Mixed and Mastered by 723freaky

[announcer]
AND NOW!!! GUY WHO STOLE A BUNCH OF INVENTIONS VS GUY WHO STOLE A BUNCH OF LAND!!! READY??? WHITE PEOPLE TECHNOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! (yuh!)

[verse 1: thomas edison]
correct me if my hearing’s wrong but i heard that you cravin’ smoke,
i ain't interested in buying your hemp but im tradin’ blows,
do ‘em like he did to natives, hoe, shove my fist right up the anushole
of this rapist, so hop back on your sailing boat,

cause my conversions broughts electric energy to light,
your conversions brought the wrongs of Christianity to light,
you dont hold a candle cause you just dont know the things that i know,
i dont hold a candle cause i got myself a lightbulb,

first youre a trader/traitor, then you're a savage,
then the most embarrassing governor since desantis,
couldn't be a spaniard, couldn't be a sailor,
even your heart turned out to be a massive failure.

[verse 2: christopher columbus]
ive searched every sea on several major expeditions,
and i still couldnt find one fucking thing that you invented,
other than the monthly bill to keep places luminescent,
only charge electricity when you're making it expensive,

kick em back to the days near a train, selling refreshments,
made the win possible and you aint taking any credit,
loser couldn't raise his kids cause patenting was more valuable,
abandoned dot and dash like your lab work was the telephone,

took money from others, couldn't stay out of their business,
until you were forced to, getting placed out of your business,
your current in the current is a relic with not one use,
even in your time the world alternated on you!

[interlude]
Thomas edison: sit down on your thinking chair, lemme give you a lecture.

Christopher, ok, you were a good thief,
but unfortunately you're the one that people fear the least 

Christopher Columbus: that's a bunch of bullshit, biggest lie ever,
times i didnt kill a native, probably never! (danii: fuck my stupid chud life)

Thomas Edison: fine, you win. you're a much better bandit,
doesn't change the fact your hat kinda makes you look like a very nice person 😇

Christopher Columbus: you look like your freaking wife when she did hardcore drugs,
i talked to your second one and i rocked her-

Thomas Edison: SIKE BITCH!!!

[verse 3: thomas edison]
pop em, spark em, char em, off em, shock em like the elephant,
if he says I'm irrelevant on the cement i cemented in,
the camera documenting this ass kicking you're getting, and
i even scribble out your influence with my electric pen,

if i was there when Chris was helming ships,
he'd kiss my ass for thinking of a way to get him where he's destined, then inventing it,
so to deny my influence is more misleading than the wind,
i've been breaking more ground than you broke stone with your chisel, bitch.

[verse 4: christopher columbus]
i aint taking no sweet shit from a diabetic,
best stay in your place unlike you did with general electric,
had the lightbulbs of other inventors screwed out they head,
if only you did that for your wife's tumor instead,

cause my name is christopher, and im from italy!
i was brought upon this planet to impose ascendancy!
while your relevance is dead, as the world keeps morphing,
dead unlike your wife if you took away her morphine.

danii: fuck my stupid chud life

Thomas Edison vs Christopher Columbus - Rap Battle! [SINGLE EDITION] (ft. YDGeon, ArnoldVA & Absolut

all crimes are legal if you aren't technically human

DumbShlop as West of Loathing
mintoreos as Turnip Boy

Written by mintoreos
Beat by Tantu Beats
Mixed by Danii
Cover by TomPuffs

[Verse 1: West of Loathing]
Lemme fire off a warning shot before I swap from western to hip-hop and spit hot *spits into spittoon*
Won’t need to wait two weeks to make this kid rot
Don’t fight an ace high like me when I’m pissed off (yes sir)
Of course you make yer town of produce frustuated (damn right)
All you can say is three points of punctuation
You may have hanged with some onion satan, but this felon sadist will expire on the pavement

I’m outta patience! *spits* Go run more errands
This herb appears just as outdated as his references
Here's a quick lesson if ya wanna keep yer residence, rippin’ up yer mail doesn’t uncorrupt the government
Don’t talk to me how you’re oh so unique just lookin’ to be another pixel art indie
Yer bit off those games and spit em back at the industry, makes sense ya exist thanks to a meme of yoshi

*spits* Kid, yer Reddit humor ain’t subtle.
How’s yer dialogue harder to sit through than yer puzzles?
And what’s with yer morals, they’re honestly horrible! 
Out killin’ kids but paying taxes is where ya struggle? *spits*
It’s not solely the forest beasts exposed to radiation *spits* 
Reviews must be too if they gave you any admiration
Always escaping *spits* the burdens he’s taken *spits*
Brings a whole new meaning *spits* to tax evasion


Hello? Are…..are yer going to say anything feller?
See, I knew- I knew you were going to pull this shit. 
I get yer a silent protagonist but c’mon man you gotta at least say something!

OH LORD ALL MIGHTY, okay that scared me, hooo

[Verse 2: Turnip Boy] 
I thought the IRS might be at my home’s doorstep but all I see here is this monochrome snore-fest
Dogging my aesthetic while looking like a joke sketch, both your art style and personality got no depth
The wild wild west just decides to fight the best against a line and vile mess it ain’t even a contest
Rushing DLC so devotees get any sort of content, but my assumed greed is what you want to condemn?

Alright then, we just met but let’s skip the pleasantries
I’ll certainly be wrecking the enemy of equity
Cus it seems to me that playing fake sheriff is your legacy
I mean jeez even your own gun’s a better deputy
Why ya facing me? You’re too drunk to battle in the first place. How’d you flop this back and forth when your game’s turn based?
You began in Boring Springs but you look more mundane. I'd say I take names but you’re already un….named!

Think you’re tough, my guy you're a pansy. Like bitch, how does a cowboy get defeated by an anti-virus? (Dumbass!)
The way your party fights shit is priceless
Haven’t seen things be worse together since that human-cactus hybrid
This beer chugging, cow punching, cheap drawing, blows at rap
And don’t try to hide those facts under one of your bowler hats
This town ain’t big enough, so get out before I smoke your ass!
and pull the gat on some sort of rip-off Henry Stickmen tra-aughhh fuck

[Verse 3: West of Loathing & Turnip Boy]
There’s another warning shot, and- oh wait, I think I hit him in the gut!
Hey, you good bud? WHY DID YOU SHOOT ME?! 
I guess this booze is makin’ me a tad woozy
You were holding a gun while downing some whisky? That’s almost as reckless as you running from your family
Are yer seriously dissin’ me while you’re bleedin’ to death? I mean as a vegetable aren’t yer meant to stay fresh?

Please just get an ambulance, quick! Feller, all we got is horse and carriage. Shit!
Look kiddo *spits* How many times do you need to spit!? Yer can either die here or yer can stop being a massive bitc-
Alright alright I get it, now don’t let me bleed out. Only if ya swear to pay the bills on yer greenhouse
I’ll never give a cent to the regime OUCH Then it’s time for me *spits* to put this freak down

West of Loathing vs Turnip Boy - Mint Rap Battles (ft. DumbShlop)

Man Ray:
It’s Man Ray, best villain in the business
Keep raps great for the thrill of a quick diss
Can’t catch a mouse, ooh, that’s really tellin’
Threats are ‘bout as empty as under my helmet 

Well then, my victory’s non-negotiable
Keep the flow ready like a Gyarados or Wartortle
On blast against, weapons or Pokemon, the same game 
Leave James like Wobbuffet, can only say his name

Take my Ray Gun and blast through you
Mermaid Man’s retired so, I choose you!
Blasting off again! It’s the same with you misfits
Make like a Game Freak employee, and quit this

Team Rocket:
Prepare for trouble.. Make it double..
Cuz we’re gonna pop off like The Dirty Bubble!
All you E.V.I.L members are so utterly lame
We could catch you, but Boss would tell us “try again!”

Meowth, that’s right! You’re not even worth the fight!
But we’ll use you as practice to make catches multiply!
It’s too easy, aren’t there any better?
You’re right, to beat you all we’d need is a feather!

You’re not a villain! You’re merely an annoyance 
A sponge has a better chance to destroy us!
You’re little group E.V.I.L? That’s ours to take!
You’re such a goody two shoes you can’t even rob a bank!

Man Ray:
Like in all your other fights, you’ve missed
Try throwing better blows, that’s Red Mist
All your outfits are a sight for sore eyes
Instead of delivering lines, try a different disguise 

I’ll beat you cuz I don’t like Team Rocket
I stomp on foes like a box full of wallets 
Stop it, you better quit wasting my time
Or prepare yourself to die, cuz the victory is mine!

Team Rocket:
We always get back up after blasting off!
You can’t get back up after tartar sauce!
You can’t be a villain! You’re weaker than Wobbuffet!
(Wobbuffet!) Hey, that’s a compliment!

Stop fighting you two! Yeah, stick to the plan!
Cause we’ll finally win after this attack!
We’ll admit you did well, but you’re still not a winner
Your verses were like Bulbasaur - perfect for beginners!

CAST:
TheMonarchy as Man Ray

Vanes as Jesse
Clarence the Duck as James
MetaStarVA as Meowth

TheToppo as Babytron

CREW:
Written by Elizalkin
Prod. George Johnson
Mixed by Kaewoo
Special Thanks to Powerofdan, M&Mattie, and JustGamer

Man Ray vs. Team Rocket - Rap Battle!

Peppino vs. Linguini - Royal Rap Battle!

PS I know this beat is overused but this has been in production for 2 years so shut up 😭 

Taiga As Peppino

Toppo As Linguini 

Cover art by Box

Mixed by Jort

Art by Epic Monkey 

Written by King Ducky

Peppino: 

Undercooked wings then crown on a meatball
Next you put in a douse of the weak sauce
Voila! A flop! Is his outcome of each job
Only things to cushion that are couch ones ya sleep on!

Since then your job was the kitchens worn wash cloth that rinses bad
A sickening rat fixes your problems? Rat in the hat!
My tough hearts strong unlike that dumb fart, Paps
As soon as one star dropped, one star dropped

Linguini:
My restaurant has a stack of dirty dishes riled
But… uh… not as fat as that big debt pile
Your the true villain it’s a due diligence 
As Matpat laid it out for us, that's a kitchen tile!

Your posture is preposterous, not mention a lot of debt that the guys hooked right to  
Id stick my neck out but I’d look like you 
Like you through tubes and YouTube kids; that’s you too many let me cook my food.  

Peppino:
You're tellin me to let you cook? Well then what am I to do
If Remmy rides in n' begins writing all of your lines for you?
Now you head the restaurant when you weren’t invited to
It won’t be long before people die from what’s  inside the food

I can’t stomach that, 
having a rodent pull at your roots like you’re some kind of puppet man
Would mom and dad be proud that their boy is one with rats?
Because of that sickness in his family tree I thought you’d put some in rap

Linguini:
When talking profit Mr.Stick had robbed him of it
From blocking bosses to stopping progress there's not a cent you’re running off with!
You cannot last as Anton Blast has lapped this
Chicken,
Can’t let go even when a chicken drags him with it

You’re a has been to fans or a flash in the pan, sorry 
he had at but a chance for being 4d then 
scrapped his backstory
And you’re as anxious as boring 
A thicker Skinner can’t score a win, he can barely stand for it

Peppino vs. Linguini - Royal Rap Battle! [ft. Taiga & Toppo]

Full video coming later this year (Hopefully September).

Kurobane Azia as Cirno
Snakebite126 as Papyrus
Writing by AshleyMagica
Beat by Diamond Style
Mixing by Jort
Temporary cover art by TheToppo

Cirno:
Cower before my might, ‘cause I am the brightest!
Like a yokai-shaped lamp - I could fool you without hiding
I’m magical, adaptable, you know I’m a natural
Try and capture the ice fairy? You’d only catch a cold

Now students, here’s a math problem:
Five royal guards face off with me - the strongest 
Subtract all the ones that got slaughtered
‘Cause Papyrus was their only option
Aren’t you supposed to get buried when it’s dogs and bones, kid?
Anyway, who’s left to defend from the one whose heart’s so frozen?
The answer is zero! There are no royal guards in Snowdin!

And you haven’t gone yet, but I predict that your lines are written in Papyrus script 
You should try a different font, ‘cause to me, that’s like Egyptian hieroglyphs
I got more fans, ‘cause I’m cooler! They wrote you hate mail, now I’m sending it
Let me spell it out for you: those are the only letters you’ll ever get

Papyrus:
THIS IS GENSOKYO’S STRONGEST? MY, YOU SURE FELL FAR
YOU’RE SO ILLITERATE, YOU CAN’T HANDLE YOUR OWN SPELL CARDS
AND WHEN THIS JUNIOR’S JUMBLED, YOU SOB LIKE, “WAHHH! IT AIN’T FAIR!”
THEY NAMED A DAY AFTER YOU? THEY SHOULD’VE NAMED A DAYCARE

YOU’RE A PAWN FOR ZUN’S GREED! YOU DARE CALL ME THE MONSTER?!
HE MILKS YOUR NAME SO MUCH, YOU SOLD OUT TO DAIRY SPONSORS
CHIRUMIRU HAS NO SAUCE, SO I’LL GO BACK TO MY PASTA
AND FURTHERMORE… SKELETONS CAN’T CATCH COLDS, YOU BAKA!

Cirno:
HEY, BACK OFF! I’m not six nor am I sixteen! I’m sixty!
I’m not your type, you sick creep! I know with children, you like getting Frisky
And despite living in snow, you reek of flop sweat
Carry my fairy status with pride, while you’re a skeleton in the closet 

Maybe try Chirumiru - it strengthens your gains
It’s good for your bones, and it’s the best thing you ever did taste
Besides that kid’s blade that got you sent to your grave
You’ll never change that human’s genocidal ways by giving them a friendly embrace
Couldn’t keep your head in the game
So you got reduced to a head in your game

Papyrus:
WHY, YES! YOU’RE AN EXPERT WHEN IT COMES TO GENOCIDAL TOLLS
THE POINT I’M MAKING IS: YOU SHATTER POOR ANIMALS INTO ICICLES
AS A ROYAL GUARD, IT’S MY DUTY TO WARN THE FROGGITS!
PAINT ME AS THE VILLAIN? I BET YOU’RE JEALOUS OF THEM ‘CAUSE YOU CAN’T MAKE THAT LEAP IN LOGIC

I SEE YOUR VILLAGE HAS COME TO REPORT A PROBLEM
THEY SAY YOU’VE ACCRUED A FORM MORE MONSTROUS…
WAIT! DID YOU JUST MAKE THAT CLAIM BECAUSE THAT ONE TIME, YOU WERE DRAWN WITH DARK SKIN?!
THAT’S YOUR CUE TO LEAVE, 9-BALL - YOU’RE OUT OF POCKET

DID YOU SEEK ME JUST BECAUSE THEY BROUGHT POTENTIAL RECRUITS OUT?
YOU THINK 9 COMES AFTER 2 - I HARDLY THINK YOU’D COUNT
JUST A LAUGHINGSTOCK WHO GOT THROWN OUT OF KEINE’S SCHOOLHOUSE
THAT’S GENSOKYO’S SPECIAL ATTACK! YOU ARE BLUE NOW!

Cirno vs Papyrus - AM Rap Battles

Ego as Tom
Ego as Herobrine
Ego as Edd, Matt, and Tord
Written by: Ego, Kyllisto
Mixed by: jordy
Cover art by: Cidisswo

LYRICS:

EGO RAP BATTLES!!!!

HEROBRINE!!!!

VS!!!!

TOM!!!!

BEGIN!!!!

[Herobrine]
It’s the, urban legend27, haunting your bros seed 
Bloodying you, vans to hair, thats how I coat steves
Your only sharp at the top, like my pyramids,
Just go check the html files, BITCH I’M HIM
Thought the drip was on point, but you look like pointed dripstone
So i wouldn’t split hairs or he might end up breaking his bones
I build structures, you get hammered and fail
Pencil neck, but I’ll be the one to drag you to hell
Got no balls, top to bottom, like your old design, you’ll flatline
But thinking bout your fanart makes me glad that I don’t have eyes

[Tom]
Holy texture change on a painting! Your flow is shit!
The funny thing about that, though: you don't exist
*sigh* pass the smirnoff, I’m stomping this hoax
Cuz y’know, I believe you, but my tomee bear don’t (Lame)
You’re no 303, you 404, with each forum page
I’m up against the fuckface taken down in every up-date?
I’ll blow up your dang place, make a mess of your blank face
Like your source code, what's left of you there won’t be a trace!

[Herobrine]
This eyeless jackoff needs a mask on to save face
But If Eddsworld was a band, than you’d play bass
No saving your save file, when I emerge from dark fog
So I’ll commence with the roasting like a burning montage
Classic stupid Tom, what's some bible student next to a god?
Your family tree is one that even I dont wanna touch on

[Tom]
Graduated from monster school, where your pupils lie and now
You’ve been milked by content farms, since they mistook you for a cow
And you’re supposed to be some evil spirit....? That’s some tame shit
Have you seen your bro’s statements? Even he’s filled with more hatred (ugh!)
I kill clones, you won’t survive against me
While I broke out of newgrounds, you got mining fatigue
I’ll treat this dead meme, like his livestream, and take his ass down
You ended how you started: by fading in the background

Edd: Wow, that was a great battle!
Tord: Oh definitely
Matt: Absolutely
Tom: No one will ever love me!

Tom (Eddsworld) vs Herobrine - Ego Rap Battles

Snakebite126 as Nagito Komaeda
Egomanic as Jumbo Josh

Lyrics Written by: Capitan Jorge, Third Coming of Christ, Cidisswo
Additional Writing by: TheToppo
Audio Mixed by Jordy


[Lyrics]:

RAP BATTLE
NAGITO KOMAEDA
VS
JUMBO JOSH
BEGIN

[0:10 - 0:52] Nagito Verse 1 [16 Bars]
I think I am talentless, then I look at this ape
Your only skill's your strength, yet those seem lacking on your game
(ugh) I have heard and I'm aware that I'm the worst
But at least I'm not dumb enough to smash Banban's girl!
Can't even say you're a stepping stone, your garten shows what hopeless is!
Your creepy-ass is going out there holding kids as hostages!
Made out of clay, yet someone should break the mold
'Cause it's clear a worker's lift ain't enough to lift your worker's hopes
(ugh!) You’re fucking shallow, I’d say prepare for your sad death
But I could spend hours stabbing you and you still wouldn’t have depth
Though how much you change sides proves your plot's got more holes
Storytelling ain't your forte, can't even tell humans from dolls
Even if you count mine, your genre is a worse cancer
Compare our robot bears and hand the L to Freddy Fazbear
I know you don't fare well with traps, so say farewell to this trap beat
Taken care of a warehouse, this trashy scare house won' t trap me!

[0:52 - 1:13] Jumbo Josh Verse 1 [8 Bars]
It's Jumbo Josh, brah. You better watch, dude
Want some isolation? Let me take you to my watch room!
To eat your veggies and fruits is what I would tell you
But you feed off attention so eating healthy wouldn't help you!
Your dog got hit by a car, you’re no Family Guy,
Because your parents got fried 40k feet in the sky.
Now you brain’s messed up ever since you lost your mama,
Getting off to Hope, like you got a Crush on Obama.

[1:13 - 1:34] Nagito Verse 2 [8 Bars]
I know I lost my parents, and that I'm just a faker
But it's sadder that this buffoon is a joke to his own creators!
(Haha!) Your watchroom ain't shit compared to Jabberwock
When a fucking jellyfish and a cat are your worst opps!
  It’s funny you think you can leave a scratch on me
When the last thing that crushed on you left injuries on your body!
Though, didn’t think anyone would look at this thing and obsess, 
Since you treat your own friends and women like objects!

[1:34 - 2:15] Jumbo Josh verse 2 [16 Bars]
(Uh!) Seems this time you failed at bringing down the house with fire!
(Uh!) Only gas you’re lighting is to your friends, you big liar!
You're just hopeless and hoeless, know the answer, bro?
'Cause your crush on Hinata turns Jabberwock to Jabberwoke!
You worship the talented, knowing you're not shit
But I know my words won't hurt you more than you already did
The way you talk ‘bout hope makes it seem like it's something you own
But your beliefs fall flatter than how I'd leave your bones
Got a million diseases, now your frail body’s dropping
Next time you’re in an octagon, I’ll make sure it’s your coffin
I'm rolling in the green, while you dress like a hobo 
I took the scene where you died and watched that shit in slo-mo
I'm a cold blooded unaliver and you got me pissed
So I'll take my fists and pulverize a twink to red mist
After I crush you flat, I'm leaving with a massive grin
Cause now Garten Of Banban just took a Jumbo-sized win!

Jumbo Josh VS. Nagito Komaeda - Cidisswo Rap Battles

Isn't Twitch great?!

STARRING:
RaccoonBroVA as Ninja
Evava as Pokimane

Written by:
ForgottenSon

Mixing and Mastering:
Box

Beat by: 
Dave James of Audio Network

Thumbnail by:
Elizalkin

Ninja:
Uh, Jess? we got a troll spewing ignorance in chat.
Never mind, it's just Poki, but there's no difference in that.
I'm topping you in streaming, besting me? You must be dreaming
It's no mystery, looking at history, let's take it back.
I was taking some names with any fps I was choosing 
While you stayed with the same vids like “I'm not seeing enough movement” 
Now I'm making moves, there’s no way I won’t prevail
I see why you’re called Poki, You’re a simp’s Horny Jail.
Oh wait, you call it Pokémon? That naming is kinda vapid.
But, I won't doubt the Impact it is leaving upon the masses
So, Pokimane, I gotta ask it amidst this whole battle
How is it I got more subs than you when you own 5 channels?
Built my foundation in Fortnite, Leave you Tilted like the Towers 
I would talk on who you are but, we'd be here for 9 hours
I must say it’s very apt your gang’s name described your friendships
So, I guess it’s no wonder you left Offline disconnected 

Pokimane:
Well, your name's half-right, you deceived me with your violence,
But, For a guy called Ninja, you really can't be silent.
A rep for being a sore loser, how can you say you're the best when
You screaming into mics? Call you Tyler1 Blevins!
The name's Imane! Live streaming and Rhyme scheming and I've beaten 
Many guys believing their lines are sweeter than Ice Cream and 
It’s a sight seeing in my sequence, your eyes leaking. 
Not the first time seeing you cry streaming
Now once upon a time, you led Twitch into its better days
‘til you sold out to Mixer; proves that you're a fucking Renegade.
You blew that like your hair [yeah] and now your time has passed [what]
So try and break New Grounds with your Boyfriend looking ass!! [Ayyy!]
Talk on content? From what I can deduce
I wanna say you’re see-through; they'd rather watch Tfue.
How can you beat me, dude, If you'll just harm yourself? 
I'm sure you'll get a kick outta this like when you bashed the NFL.

Ninja:
Hmph…You talk a lot of shit, no wonder your surname's Anus (Anys)
This ain’t a collab stream, I'm not someone you should play with
Given how you dealt with drama every time you get hurt
I'm surprised you didn't copyright strike me mid verse [Ha ha!]
Heard better from Marshmello, if that’s the best the you can send
Then you can call me Keemstar; they're a 2 out of 10! [Damn!]
I'm always dropping out the battle bus to beat my foes with certainty. 
The only place you can drop out of is University.

Pokimane:
Dropping out? That's the pot calling the kettle black.
I'd tell you to Rewind, but we know you bomb at that. [True!]
Keep up the attitude and soon enough you’ll be finding
your whole career getting shot down - Stream Sniping!
After hearing all your verses, the one thing I have discovered
both in rapping and in Fortnite, you can't make a decent structure.
Sad you failed to fire shots, So I suggest now you shut it
Cuz, you only play Epic Games when you're being their puppet



Next time:
LET’S GO GAMBLING!!!!
(Ft.ThatAdorableFox and Kurobane Azia)


Ninja vs Pokimane -  Rap Battles of the Forgotten!

Welcome back to Lame-Ass Rap Battles! Today we have two platforms for casual gamers, one for browsers and one for mobile devices; Cool Math Games vs Google Play Games. Enjoy!

Commander Jacob as Cool Math
YouTube: www.youtube.com/c/CommanderJacob
Twitter: www.twitter.com/commander_jacob

TaigaTonic as Google Play
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TaigaTonic
Twitter: www.twitter.com/TaigaTonic

- LYRICS -

CMG (0:12)
Listen Talking Tom, let’s just speed up the chat
I’ll kill a record, you ain’t even up to Scratch
Park it. Whose site’s been driving since ‘97? Not yours
If you bring your bars forward, I’m flipping ‘em like Bloxorz
This Dude’ll Jump to a height he still can’t reach my peak from
I’m your Papa and you just entered the Beat-ya-ria
How’d we get you? This equation should cut it
Me, minus screen size and physical buttons

GPG (0:32)
There can’t be a Way To Die that’s a little bit Dumber
Cuz tryna catch up to me is just an infinite runner
It’s a crapshoot. You came to our platform and your app’s Pou
I have your appeal while not trapped in a classroom
Take the win off your wishlist, don't wanna level up your hope
Barely hanging onto life so I’ve come to Cut the Rope
Tweets and merch about your original game? Great plan!
… it’s still just Hangman

CMG (0:52)
Speaking of: personality. You’re not spelling it
Fireboy and Watergi- kid I’ve been in my element
But no, bro, I can tell you’re proud to be mobile
With your games you put on PC and controller logo
You’re constantly begging for reviews like you’re owed answers
Well here: "one star; iOS with no standards
Or quality assurance." And you’re claiming you’re dope?
Mr. CEO of “you got games on your phone?”

GPG (1:12)
You’re the start but I’m the end of Johnny Upgrade’s coins
E-rated Newgrounds is getting negative Play Points
Clashing our Clans is really asking for death
My brand Game On lock with how it PAX an event (Let’s go!)
I don’t even need Flappy or Red to fuel my Jetpack
Your prominence Bricked! Mine? You can’t get Half
Algebra, Geometry: type of stuff you Dashed from
Still being named “Cool Math” doesn’t add up

CMG (1:32)
The kids behind the screen? Brought their childhood radness
You green hogs are only tryna siphon their cash quick
“World's Hardest Game” for you is not piling ads in
No Candy, Crush you for free, fuck microtransactions

GPG (1:42)
This heat’ll shut you down; that’s a firewall. What I’ve gathered?
I’m not paying premium, but you won’t forget my past words
After you’ve Raided Shadows of Legends for your backlog
I made your numbers leave like your mascot or when Flash stopped

- CREDITS -

Written, directed, edited, and beat arranged by Commander Jacob
Mixed by GamingPlush64
Beat produced by Kelly Mac and Ben Fowler of Audio Network
Additional instruments by Splice and Neon Wave

Feedback by GamingPlush64, TaigaTonic, TheMonarchy, Freshy Kanal, RNG, JustGamer, Dilly Scott, Eric the Audible, 3ple, Danii, TheBabyBeef, Powerofdan, and the rest of the spaceship
Shout-out to Mr. Tibbs, Fightmarker, ayjayyy, and Karen Lyn Davis

Thanks for watching
-ComJac

Thomas Edison vs Christopher Columbus - Rap Battle! [SINGLE EDITION] (ft. YDGeon, ArnoldVA & Absolut

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