Snakebyte Rap Battles

K.C. as Scheherezade 
Snakebite126 as The Crypt Keeper

SNAKEBYTE RAP BATTLES
SCHEHEREZADE
VS
THE CRYPT KEEPER
BEGIN!

Scheherazade:
Once upon a time, there lived a horrid dweller in a gory cellar 
Who thought that his lore was better ‘til the most notorious storyteller 
Showed him hell and if pain’s how you get your pleasure
I’ll have this masochist corpse left living happily forever
Take your aged BO away from my throne and wash up
No shock you got censored looking like Jeff Dunham’s condom
Got the monkey’s paw flows ‘cause it’s a death wish testing me
I got this gold in the bag like OPEN SESAME
Your OG writers couldn’t have had a sadder day mourning 
Once you stooped to some kiddie slapstick every Saturday morning 
And Rod Serling’s rolling body’s all that you can make move, son
Tried to be the top anthology but seems you hit some Goosebumps
I bewildered the known world with my Arabian Nights
You left moviegoers wanting to erase Demon Knight
I’ve won before you’ve even had a chance to diss me
So I shall make like your mother’s tomb and wrap this up quickly

The Crypt Keeper:
Welcome boils and ghouls, have a listen if you’d please
And I’ll give you all a Look-See at some real Crypt TV
Better make like Judd Campbell and start to knock on wood
‘Cause I assassinate Sassanids faster than the conquests could
I’m a sinful badass sailing on these flows 
You can’t diss the pro with your PG Disney prose
So maybe listen your dad and start retreatin’ 
Or I’ll render all 1,001 Nights of yours sleepless
I keep it lit, your flow’s Schehere-shoddy
You got style drier than my own barren body
When it comes to baller narrators, I take the crown
So let me make like a maggot and break it down (Psycho!)
Got love for all the little boils and ghouls, die-versity
Your hubby ripped through slaves cause he couldn’t fulfill his girlies’ needs
Now his queen needs to read to him ‘til he’s sleeping
About as good a catch as that jar with the genie
All the splendid deaths caused for your happy life
So much virgin blood spilled, you’d think it was a sacrifice
Cause once his incel terror caused every young maiden’s death
You pawned yourself off to him like a game of chess

Scheherazade:
Crawl back to Fear Street so your torture porn’s no longer told
There’ll be no issue once you’re silenced…like the Comics Code
The vizier’s daughter is slaying Kassir’s monster
With stories you read causing some young kiddies’ dreams trauma
I’m the king’s consort, I can’t be bothered
Entertaining this big circus act, like you take after your freak father 
And none can rock the academy like my score did
Your crypt’s got the corniest jam since Michael Jordan’s
My verbal execution’s like Niles, leaving your brain fried 
Got murdered by this music, so tell Alfred I say hi

The Crypt Keeper:
I’m a bull, you’re an ass feigning sickness
Strolling to the royal palace like “I can fix him”
This mistress in distress is going to need her sis when
I’m Carrie-Ann this track to leave you axed, Merry Cryptmas
My core-shaking stories leave horror minds inspired
While the tales you’re peddling make the Fresh Prince look expired
Your execution’s come so the sultan will have to tell your boo
That another of his ladies has been royally screwed

Instrumental by Epistra
Beat Arrangement/Additional Instruments by Snakebite126
Mixing and Mastering by Freshy Kanal
Special thanks to Freshy Kanal, Zagranis, Mothmancha, Adroitwhiz, and Walk