Hi 
Plz scroll down and look at my bio :D

I am secretly a grub
No one likes me
Everyone hates me
People have tried to kill me
But I always come back
I always survive 
Do I want to live 
…
No
I don’t deserve life
Grubs don’t deserve life 
I hate being a grub 
Sometimes I want to be an ant
They are just so much better
They have better everything’s
And still
All I am is a stupid lonely grub 
Grubs can’t be ants
Or even any other bug
Grubs are grubs
And sometimes 
I hate having to be a grub 
I hate being in a grub form
I hate being ridiculed by the other grubs
They tell me 
“You won’t be an ant”
“You can never be an ant”
And when they get bored of that they say 
“Your not even a good grub”
“I’ve never seen a grub like you” 
They always say it in a bad tone too
I hate every grub in the world
They are dumb
Sometimes 
…
I don’t even wanna be alive
…
I don’t wanna be a grub
Or even an ant 
I wanna be dead
…
A dead grub sounds good to me 
I wanna be buried 
Deep 
Deep
Deep 
In earths core
And burn 
And melt
And eventually die

No joke I’m not mentally well that’s why I wrote this, no I don’t think I’m a grub or an ant, but in a way, I am, feeling trapped in a “grub” body when I was really supposed to be born an “ant” and everything people say make me feel worse and cause suicidal thoughts and wish I was never born and all of that pain and suffering I give it to other people and then make them feel bad too, I wrote this for a reason to prove that not everyone has it easy and that not everyone makes the right decisions but that perfectly normal in a sense we are all “grubs” living in a “dirty” world and there is nothing you can do to change that so people please don’t mind what others say and be whoever you wanna be and don’t let them control you, you are your own person, you can do this <3



Sometimes I tell myself “I’m not a Kaito simp” but then at the same time I look him up on rule34 :(


I play Project Sekai 
Is it noticeable? 

Been a vocaloid fan since around 2017-2019 idek tbh
fav character: Tsukasa
Fav group: wonderland x Showtime
Fav Vocaloid: idfk tbh☠️
Fav group (WxS) Vocaloid: Hatsune Miku 
Fav project Sekai Vocaloid: nightcord Kaito, All Leo/need Vocaloids (they are silly) 
Fav mmj member: minori 
Fav l/n member: saki
Fav vbs member: Toya
Fav wxs member: Tsukasa 
Fav n25 member: Mizuki 

Fav Kagamine twin: Kagamine Len!

Fav project diva outfit: transmitter/receiver 
Fav pjdv miku outfit: ?
Fav pjdv len outfit: punkish
Fav pjdv rin outfit: magic chef/sissors
Fav pjdv kaito putfit: cyber cat
Fav pjdv meiko outfit: meiko cristmas
Fav pjdv other outfits: ?


I'm just here chilling :p

My stupid ah high school is always musty in the hallways and I freaking hate it sm 😭😭


Ok so I was getting breastfeed by a ai bot and now I'm curious on how breastfeeding feels for the woman… (if you are my irl friend u didn't see this)



To clarify the “🌈♾️” in my user stands for autism and NOT proshipper bc someone mentioned that to me and I got scared 😭‼️
I also have adhd 🤑🤑🤑

Note: i feel like everyone is changing without me and I'm just stuck in the past and my own hardships :(( I'm not sure how to change or if i ever will change 
Even though I'm kinda young (teen) i feel like I've already changed so much 
I've went through so much and they say i still will change
I think I'm stuck like this tbh
All the bad and good parts of my personality and my soul might stick forever and I'm kinda scared it will
My mental health keeps getting worse and I'm scared about getting a job
I'm not like other people mentally (emo ah) and i sometimes hate being neurodivergent because of stuff like this
People say i look 20 but act like a 8 year old
People have always said this
I look older but i act super young
I don't really wanna be like this
I can't control it 
People don't know that it's just the way i am and I'm not forcing myself to seem like this :(
If my Irl friend sees this I'm gonna get asked like 927397 questions
I hate being asked those questions :((

CottenCandy24 🌈♾️