produced by: @freveltrothy
happy halloween (even though by the time I drop this it'll probably be like fuckin 2037)

i think i killed another man last night 
i didn’t even stop to check
either way he’s not moving 

all i need is a mask and a knife
i don’t ever need a glock
little bitch i’m not shooting 

only time i ever truly feel alive
is when i’m cutting thru his flesh
swear the sound kinda soothing 

i took his wallet 
saw his girl as a picture 
go to the address
finish it and bring the jewels in 

so i cry
till my eyes swell up
and i can’t fall asleep 
think i’m too fucked up
room spinning think i’m gonna throw up
and i guess im old news 
your new man look tough 

i wanna bleach my eyes but im way too scared
so i just stare at the sun 
wanna close myself
cus you were never there
at least you’re having fun

i don’t know why i’m like this 
how the fuck could i take another man from his family? 
so i go and wash the knife quick,
think i went overboard 
violence charge my battery 
no point tryna fight this,
know i’m gonna go to jail
insane
yeah i had to be 
when i cut him, kinda liked it 
need to go home now
hope my moms not mad at me 

i think i killed another man last night 
i didn’t even stop to check
either way he’s not moving 

all i need is a mask and a knife
i don’t ever need a glock
little bitch i’m not shooting 

only time i ever truly feel alive
is when i’m cutting thru his flesh
swear the sound kinda soothing 

i took his wallet 
saw his girl as a picture 
go to the address
finish it and bring the jewels in

killer (frevel)

produced by caves : )

were u being sincere when you calling me
everynight for a few months you were onto me
its getting too much when you leave
why'd you make it so hard just to breathe
i blame it on you but i think it was me
i knew you would go but i thought we would speak
just stay get rid of my fears
the last thing id say is that i love you dear
your head on my bed im holding you near

im nervous another year you look over
you're perfect i need to let go of her
but i cant but i cant wish i could but i cant
but i cant cos i loved her

id kiss on your neck but it brings it my tears
stay right here get rid of my fears
i cant even say your name
no way your happy being mine
touch my neck im getting shivers down my spine
not getting better but i tell everyone im fine
i think that you would be happy when i die
i want it end it all when i see him lie
i wanna hurt him bad if you cry
all i ever had was the sky
now its all bad when you fly
im really not glad your my ally

im nervous another year you look over
you're perfect i need to let go of her
but i cant but i cant wish i could but i cant
but i cant cos i loved her

now your just a name on my phone

nervous

everyones an asshole 
my plug cuts his coke and my doctor pushes benzos 
my head smacked the floor when i tripped off my board
skating round the halls cause my parents aren't at home
today ive been bored
today i woke up at 4
needed stuff but got too high to drive to the store
at the checkout said "how are you?"
i said "not much"
on my way out i tripped and my thing of eggs crushed

dont be ashamed to be proud of yourself or slow down for a sec 
i say as i quietly critique parts of myself 
i guess i just keep helping so i wont need help
but regardless it helps

can you tell me we're good now?
you left me put down
bad is my good now
when i cry it's a good sound 

(hamilton)
cut it all out
take it all away
i dont wanna feel 
no not today 
numb to the pain numb to it all
hanging by a thread i might fall
i might slip 
lose my grip 
tryna find out where the time went
where it all goes
i dont know
i can only walk the path i chose 
build me up just to break my bones
crushing up drugs on my phone
tryna fix my heart but it got worse
every time i fall in love it hurts
every time i try to not think bout you it dont work
maybe im just meant to be alone with the dirt
but maybe its just meant to be 
i get so high i cant speak
walking round cant feel my feet
when i sleep i grit my teeth
when i sleep youre all i see
so every nights a bad dream 
i dont wanna wake up
just to feel nothing

when i cry it sounds good (with hamilton and sorrow bringer)

just a vent, very drunk rn 
shoutout my brother @jolst on the production



tell me baby does he write you songs? 
blood all on my pillow when i wake up shit is wrong
i been takin 30’s got me itchin i can’t stop 
every time i think i got a hit it start to flop
i wish that i never saw those numbers from the start 
try not to let it bug me but i can’t lie it hurt my heart
i spill my soul on the mic n go smoke a dart 
shoutout to big veins we just alike in that regard 

everybody write bout doin drugs, it’s ok
but u ain’t ever threw up in ur sleep it burn ur lungs
i been sippin lean for 4 days babe im havin fun, ay
feel my heart beatin in my chest i’m dying young
and words are powerful theyll kill u like a gun 
watch the shit u speak cus ur whole life it becomes
people love to talk their shit but watch em when i run
when i fly to USA im landin with a punch 

i got G.E.R.D
regurgitation ): 
might pop a 40
and float away and
can’t stand you phonies
so go away yea
got good friends round me
but they won’t stay, yea 
and i’m used to that 
always been the same 
since a small boy i been
always filled with hate 
but i love my momma 
and i love my dad :)
and i’m thankful daily
for the shit i have 

maybe life is okay
maybe it’s not that bad 
i got someone who loves me
can’t argue with that <3 
i still get so fucked up
til i can’t call a cab 
i been tryna love myself 
but i don’t love me back 
i still wake everyday 
with shit on my shoulders i’m a heavyweight
get away
from all the negative things i always say 
fill the page
with shit i would think but i would never say
care+ in my drink 
but i been tryna get in better shape 

i can’t even think yea 
baby i’m just sitting here recording with a drink yea 
shoutout to the gang 
that’s double L all on my krink yeah 
shoutout to the goat jolst 
can’t wait till we link yeah <3 (love u bro) 

n i still wear a hoodie 
even when it’s hot
pull it over my face
so u can’t see me rot
baby take your hood down
girl i’m self conscious
everybody talkin money $$$
don’t know what a job is 

i guess this is what they call 
a r- release 
i just love you all so much 
that i can’t even speak
i feel fuckin worthless
but you’re all helping me
this one for the soundcloud
ima go to sleep … 

(love u all bro i get a lil soppy when i am drunk sorry )

maybe its not that bad (jolst)

no stone left unturned, dont fear the reaper when he rides

produced by brody & notmorgn
thank you all for listening ily <3

SPOTIFY

to be free (ft brody) [p. brody & notmorgn]

please don’t step on my heart 
i’ve been over and over this
many times before 
please don’t get out my car 
the door opens and you leave 
and then we fall apart 

call my bluff, we play cards 
but she always has the ace 
hiding up her sleeve 
i can’t ever recall
not one moment that she ever 
simply smiled at me 

and those cold eyes make me panic
what do you want 
i can’t manage 
and those bright red lips 
make me vanish
what do you want with me 

stop the crying and the shouting, im sorry 
but maybe you’re better off
i’ll stop the crying if u tell me u want me
i’ll do anything no matter the cost

cus the rain my love hasn’t stopped coming
ever since you were the one i lost
i can’t be here without you, im dying
one kiss will finish me off 

please don’t step on my heart (stop the crying and the shouting i’m sorry)
i’ve been over and over this
many times before (but maybe you’re better off)
please don’t get out my car (i’ll stop the crying if u tell me u want me) 
the door opens and you leave 
and then we fall apart (i’ll do anything no matter the cost)

call my bluff, we play cards (cus the rain my love hasn’t stopped coming) 
but she always has the ace 
hiding up her sleeve (ever since you were the one i lost) 
i can’t ever recall (i can’t be here without you, im dying)
not one moment that she ever 
simply smiled at me (one kiss will finish me off)

banshee (wisssery)

LOVIN U

Chasing Greatness

Chris brown ft kehlani-Thoughts

thank you for listening 
<3
https://soundcloud.com/jolst
https://soundcloud.com/sadboiforever


it hurts me over n over again 
i think something’s wrong with my head
it’s easy to try and pretend 
but sometimes i’d rather be dead
i’m paranoid 
think you hate me 
shedding tears over our polaroids 
expectations on my chest, defenses i employ 

it’s okay, you can tell me i’m wasting your time
you don’t feel like you did and it’s fine 
you don’t miss me, it’s alright 
i get a bag n i spend it real quick 
i got some diamonds they dance on my wrist 
see me n public now they want a pic 
money can’t come much more easy than this 
every night i spent dreaming of shit 
every night i spent waiting for this 
i could lose it all
i don’t wanna fall 
i could pull the trigger 
paint the fucking wall

paranoid (prod. 2001 & jolst)

LYRICS:
Please don't leave me waiting 
Got thoughts in my head and they never fading
Please don't leave me waiting 
Got thoughts in my head and they never fading  
Okay break it up I want the balance
No way that you think you acting valid
Challenge every time we go through this
All ballads how I tell her let's risk
It please don't leave me waiting 
Got thoughts in my head and they never fading
And our playlist of songs they  just keep replaying 
I wanna make this clear I'm always staying 

Give me every little bit of your emotion 
Know when it comes to love you're loaded 
I don't wanna run I think you know it 
I told the stars and I think they'll show it

Okay break it up I want the balance
No way that you think you acting valid
Challenge every time we go through this
All ballads how I tell her let's risk
It please don't leave me waiting 
Got thoughts in my head and they never fading
And our playlist of songs they  just keep replaying 
I wanna make this clear I'm always staying  

Yeah please just hear me out 
I wanna know the things that you think about 
Please please just hear me out 
Run away then back to me I'll be around  
And if wanna walk under city lights 
So close with your hand just next to mine 
Hit me up I know backways even to your heart 
Wanna start again that way
Give me every little bit of your emotion 
Know when it comes to love you're loaded 
I don't wanna run I think you know it 
I told the stars and I think they'll show it

Okay break it up I want the balance
No way that you think you acting valid
Challenge every time we go through this
All ballads how I tell her let's risk
It please don't leave me waiting 
Got thoughts in my head and they never fading
And our playlist of songs they  just keep replaying 
I wanna make this clear I'm always staying 
Please don't leave me waiting 
Got thoughts in my head and they never fading
Please don't leave me waiting 
Got thoughts in my head and they never fading

leave me waiting (prod. IOF x King Theta)

existing is exhausting, but im happy youre here

to be free (ft brody) [p. brody & notmorgn]

thebreathingbackwards

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