what's there to see?
a million trees staring at me
would you believe?
they live for me, unwillingly

the leaves have grown back
don't you see?
flowing in the wind;
such a breeze

harsh to the touch 
you splintered my knees

good things were made to hurt
me



demo I wrote early winter 2024

window

be gentle with me
I break easily
didn't get enough sleep
must dream that I am somewhere else
so don't wake me

a million times I gave up trying
just repeating a cycle
now idk what's good anymore
and all the things I used to do has lost all meaning
yeah nothing's working

I wanna be the star not the sideshow
not the limbs to the body of a tightrope
greedy for the spotlight
give me more screentime
I think we're just alike;
more than we'll ever know

would you look out for me? 
don't wanna feel alone anymore
never get enough sleep
can't help that I am somewhere else
could you chase me?

a million times I gave up trying
just repeating a cycle
now idk what's good anymore
and all the things I used to do has lost all meaning
yeah nothing's working

I wanna be the star not the sideshow
not the limbs to the body of a tightrope
greedy for the spotlight
give me more screentime
I think we're just alike;
more than we'll ever know

demo I wrote summer 2024

sideshow

I don't mean to cry
it's not like I miss you
it hurts more each day; 
I thought-- I'm pushing through

every time I think it's getting better
I tank right down again,
I thought you'd never
throw it away like you did
and you'd check on me;
ask if "we're" not okay

I know I put out the match
but as I blew it 
I told you that I loved you
and I never even said that I stopped

& you stopped

demo written in march 2025

demo written sep 2024
voice memo recorded jan 4, 2026

my dog and i make sense 
i wont talk to u
less you get through my dog

my mom cut her hair
she said she looks funny
but to me she’s still my dog

she barks loudly 
but she’s sweet and sound
tell me if its true
i dont know what id do
without my dog (x6)

my dog (voice memo)

written 2024
voice memo recorded jan 4 2026

sideshow (voice memo)

written april 2025
voice memo recorded jan 4 2026

disgusted by my silhouette
same cutout routine 
if i dont 
do it myself
before life gets to me

the air
oh its brushing 
against my skin
time’s always running
when i

dont wanna grow old 
woke up again
“it’s a waste of space”
just perfect 
when you’re far away 

im self aware 
but i can’t help myself 

wont let it happen 
but its always at the 
back of my mind 

ill go right back to
lying down on the floor 
just so you can hear me weeping 
mistake my intentions 
make me hate myself 

wont let it happen 
but its always at the 
back of my mind

ideation (voice memo)

demo written jan 2025
voice memo recorded jan 31 2025

i’m scoring the clay like its muscle memory 
i held my anger, grit my teeth
even if youd help i wont take it
and i admit it’s all my fault 

oh i wish youd stop making a fool out of me
i’m the one who held the cookie cutter 
stuck right to the mold 
no more left room to grow
except (up and out)(and up and down)

couldve stopped it, you didn’t force me
but i know youd like me different than i am
no one’s exempted
baby, it hurts just the same
ill throw it away 

the pain is temporary but so is the fix
i gave up on trying 
but am i trying too hard on being cynical?
irony, the pinnacle of (all this) time

cookie (voice memo)

demo written dec 2023
voice memo recorded jan 4 2026

i think i’ve got some potential
give me some time 
and i’ll let you know i’m fine
there’s something wrong w my mental
ill open up just to run away and hide

give me a reason not to think about it
im just a sucker for appeasing the worst conversation 
i dont know what to do about it
my future’s looking for that internet validation 

the seasons come over
the weathers not warmer now
aahhh ah ah ah
im not a performer 
but the show isn’t over now

i live and crave the attention 
i’m just a pop star
bathing in your indecisions 
dont tell me its over
when i let you down, yeah
my head keeps spinning

give me a reason not to think about it
im just a sucker for appeasing the worst conversation 
i dont know what to do about it
my future’s looking for that internet validation 

we only grow older
you’re getting so boring now
aahhh ah ah ah
i’m eating my words up
don’t let me start choking down

internet (voice memo)

demo written likeeee 2023 or 2024 i Forget… mp3 pulled from my video actually but voice memo sure same ting ya

constant (voice memo)

demo written may 2024
voice memo recorded jan 4 2026

rid the taste on my tongue,
i dont seem to like it
while the poison is young.
cut it off im writing
these words to set me free
from this curse i put on me

my mouth is shaking
my limbs are heavy
my bones are breaking 
so break me gently
now theres nothing else to hide
i dont mind

i set myself up for this
so i cant complain 
pile it up just because 
it’s “all inside my head”

just for once would you believe me?
when im aching on my knees
to try and feel something 
do i waste the air by breathing in?

all bark no bite, just the fun
of drawing circles 
lets take three cheers for bad blood
defeat the tempo
now you see me choking up
i cant lie

i set myself up for this
so i cannot complain 
pile it up just because 
it’s “all inside my head”

handful (voice memo)

demo written & 
voice memo recorded jan 4 2026
first quick write of the yeaaar 

i would kill to trace 
the outline of your hands
every fingerprint 
turned to a stamp

young, gentle, free
not a care in the world 
let’s cause mischief 
you and me

keep it subliminal 
plain and simple 
i’m not saying a word
singing instead 

i only wanna know what’s good 
sometimes
never really know why you flood
my mind 
If i’m taking your hand
let’s cause mischief 
you and me

i would kill to trace 
the outline of your hands
every fingerprint 
turned to a stamp

young, gentle, free
not a care in the world 
let’s cause mischief 
you and me

stomping plastic

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