My first Eve Online parody - a love song dedicated to all the drones I have ever left in space.  Hope you enjoy it :)

♥♥♥

Hey drone, it's me, I was wondering
If after all these ticks you'd like to meet 
to reconnect to my ship
They say aligning supposed to save you
unless they're instalocking

Hey drone can you hear me?
I'm docked up in station dreaming of engaging enemies
We were connected and free
I've forgotten how it felt to have you orbiting my ship
There's such a distance between us
and I'm station camped

(Chorus)
Hello from planet five
I must've tried a thousand times
to tell you I'm sorry for abandoning drones
but on recall you're never quick to get home
Hello from planet five
At least I can say that I've tried
To tell you I'm sorry for warping away
But it don't matter, you clearly aren't there in space any more

Hey drone, how are you?
It's so typical of me to warp off leaving you behind
I hope, that you're safe
Did you ever make it out of system scooped in someone's bay
It's no secret
That I'm terrible at Eve Online

(Chorus)
So hello from planet five
I must've tried a thousand times
to tell you I'm sorry for abandoning drones
but on recall you're never quick to get home
Hello from planet five
At least I can say that I've tried
To tell you I'm sorry for warping away
But it don't matter, you clearly aren't there in space any more

(Chorus)
Hello from planet five
I must've tried a thousand times
to tell you I'm sorry for abandoning drones
but on recall you're never quick to get home
Hello from planet five
At least I can say that I've tried
To tell you I'm sorry for warping away
But it don't matter, you clearly aren't there in space any more


Hey Drone

Another Eve Online parody - this one is an ode to everyone who's ever yearned for something more from their gameplay :)

♥♥♥

Look at this ISK, isn't it neat?
Wouldn't you think that my endgame's complete?
Wouldn't you think I'm the girl
The girl who has everything?

Look at this trove, treasures untold
How many assets can one hangar hold?
Looking around here you'd think
Sure, she's got everything

I've got salvage and blueprints a plenty
I've got PI components galore
You want camera drones? Sure, how many?
But who cares? No big deal,
I want more

I wanna be where they PVP
I wanna see, wanna see explosions
Flying around in those
What do you call 'em? Oh, fleets

Station trading can get quite dull,
Grit is required for fighting solo
Honing my skills to get
what's that word again
l33t

Up where they point, up where they scram
Up where they die but don't give a damn
Oh PVP
Wish I could be, part of that fleet

What would I give if I could live
Outside of high-sec?
What would I pay to spend a day
Cruisin' through null?

Down a wormhole, they wouldn't troll
Coz they don't spam it up in local
Bob be willing, sick of spinning
Ready to fight

And ready to know what the bittervets know
Ask 'em my questions
And get some answers
What's a Jita and why does it - what's the word?
Burn?

When's it my turn?
Wouldn't I dream, dream of my killboard being more green?
Screw PVE
Wish I could be
Part of that fleet

Part Of Your Fleet

This song was written for Max Singularity and Huey Black, whose wonderful idea it was to create Eve: The Musical.  Hope you enjoy :)

♥♥♥

And now I'm all alone again
Nowhere to dock no one to warp to
Without a hull without my probes without a bookmark to escape to
And now the fleet is near
And I would love to disappear

Instead I warp around in space while everybody else is searching
I know they're here but then I wonder why they aren't yet all converging
Insurance paid my hull
But can I get back home to null?

On my own
With local seeming empty
All alone this wormhole's getting scary
In the darkness I feel the cloakies prowling
And when I drop from warp I close my eyes and pray for mercy

Here in space my capsule shines like silver
At the sun it glistens like a mirror
On dscan the system's full of combats
And all I see's them scanning me
Forever and forever

And I know it's only in my mind
That I'm talking to myself and not in comms
And although their scouts seem to be blind
Still I pray there's a way to split

I love eve
But when the fight is over
I am lost
I should have undocked sober
No regrets,
But stuck here at their mercy
I should have saved a bookmark when I 
started on this journey

I love eve
But every day I'm learning
That I risk
My genolutions burning
Without them
I could have self destructed
And woken up in station 
Ready to undock again
I love eve 
I love eve
I love eve
But never on my own

On My Own (A Pod's Lament)

A tongue-in-cheek song written for Bam Stroker and all my other AUTZ peeps :)

♥♥♥

Well there's a capsuleer logging in to Eve after 8 o'clock
She's been working all day, waiting for that fleet
They finally assemble and undock
She hears that sound, cluster shuts down
She throws down her mouse and she says

(Chorus)
What about me, it isn't fair
I've paid my accounts now i want my share
Can't you see I wanna play
But Eve just shuts down every day

Well there's a dessy fleet roaming through the systems of fac war space
They're shotgunning each plex, hunting for a kill
Until the server says log at a safe
FC's not too proud to cry out loud 
He hits push-to-talk and he screams

(Chorus)
What about me, it isn't fair
Don't all log off now I'm in despair
Can't you see I wanna fly
But you all call it at downtime

So timers resetting to the quiet time zone
We may be few but we're the ones
That make it hard to take sov
So listen, CCPlease
What about me

And now I'm logging back in through the launcher screen
Nobody's online, nobody's undocked
Targets are few and far between
I guess I'm lucky, I die a lot
But sometimes I wish for downtime to stop

(Chorus)
What about me, it isn't fair
Paid my accounts now I want my share
Can't you see I wanna play
But Eve just shuts down...

AUTZ, it isn't fair
Server's gone down now I'm in despair
Can't you see I wanna play
But Eve just shuts down...
Eve just shuts down...
Eve just shuts down every day

What about me
AUTZ
What about me

What About AUTZ

This song really needs no introduction - it's about the addictive game we play called Eve Online.  Enjoy!

♥♥♥

On a quick trip through null-sec, cargo hold full of wares
Trying to make it to Jita, on a wing and a prayer
Up ahead in the distance, I saw a shimmering light
My heart grew heavy as I dropped from warp
A bubble's caught me tonight
There she sat in her svipul;
I heard my shields expire
And I was thinking to myself,
"It won't be long before I retire"
Then she lit up my capsule... and she showed me the way
Creepy voices in the station sounds,
I thought I heard them say...

Welcome to the game called Eve Online
Such a lovely place (Such a lovely place)
Flying round in space
Plenty of room on the server Eve Online
Any time of year (Any time of year)
You can find us here

Her mind is warp-core-stab-twisted, she loves to be the troll
she got a lot of newbro miner kills for the lolz
How they rage in local, sweet salty tears
Corpses of her enemies, corpses of her peers

So I pinged up my corpmates,
"Please scout me through space"
They said, "We never use that route out here when a gate camp's in place"
And still those drifters are calling from far away,
Wake me up in the middle of the night
Just to hear them say...

Welcome to the game called Eve Online
Such a lovely place (Such a lovely place)
Shooting things in space
They wrecking' it up in the game called Eve Online
What a nice Keepstar (what a nice Keepstar)
Bring your avatar

Ship spinning in station
Quafe Zero on ice
Aura said "We are all just prisoners here, of our own device"
And in the captain's quarters,
We gathered to explore
We walk around and sit on the couch,
But we can't go through the door

Last thing I remember, I was
trying to resign
I had to find the wormhole back
To my life pre-Eve Online
"Relax," said the GM,
"We are programmed to receive.
You can unsub any time you like,
But you can never leave!"

Hotel Eve Online

Another offering for Eve: The Musical.  Enjoy!  

♥♥♥

Whenever I see someone
less competent than I
(And let's face it - who isn't
less competent than I?)
My tender heart
Tends to start to bleed
When a shitfit killmail greets my eyes
I simply have to criticise
I know, I know exactly what it needs
And even in your case
Though it's the toughest case I've yet to face
Don't worry - I'm determined to succeed
Follow my lead
And yes, indeed
You'll learn to

PVP! 

You're gonna ace PVP!
I'll teach you the proper tips when you fit your ships
Little ways to max and min, ooh!
I'll show you what guns are dank
How to fix your tank
Everything to help you win

Solo PVP!
I'll help you crush PVP!
You'll know how to spiral in
You'll be slingshottin'
Fly the way you've got to fly
To avoid
The tons of ridiculous ways to die

Don't be offended by my thorough scrutiny
Think of it as ship insurance fraud immunity
Now that I've chosen to become a pal, 
a fitter bitter vetter
There's nobody better
Not when it comes to PVP -
I know about PVP!
And with a few proper fits
To equip your ships
Instead of dual tank rail Lokis - oh gee...
There's nothing that can blap you - 
That I fully guarantee!  Eee.

Dee dee, dee dee
You're gonna win at PVP!

When I see depressing kill mails
Green and purple missile firetails
I remind them there are tons of fits
on Google!
Also with the best and brightest
soloists and fac war fighters
Did they take every battle?
Don't make me laugh!

They were ship savvy! Please -
It's all about when to flee!
It's not about DPS
It's when you aggress
So it's very shrewd to be
Very good at quick escapes
Like me!

And though you protest
That you do know best
I know clandestinely
You're gonna need my guidance
to help your solo ability - Ah!
Dee dee, dee dee - You'll win PVP
Just not... when you land on grid
With me!

Another Eve Online Parody - hope you enjoy it :)

♥♥♥

Don't wish it away
Don't look at it like it's forever
Between our two corps I could honestly say
Standings can only get redder

And while there's a truce
Shine up your cannons so bright
And it won't be long before you and me run
To the place at the sun where we fight

(Chorus)
And I guess that's why we call them our blues
Time spinning ships could be time shooting you
Laughing like villains, killing our brothers
Trolling in local, making them suffer
And I guess that's why we call them our blues

Just sitting in space
Picture my ship on dscan
Undock from station without hesitation
You're safe from my lock, point and scram

Warp to me girl
Cry salty tears if it helps
But more than ever I love a gudfite
More than I love NRDS

(Chorus)
And I guess that's why we call them our blues
Time spinning ships could be time shooting you
Laughing like villains, killing our brothers
Trolling in local, making them suffer
And I guess that's why we call them our blues

Warp to me girl
Cry salty tears if it helps
But more than ever I love a gudfite
More than I love NRDS

(Chorus)
And I guess that's why we call them our blues
Time spinning ships could be time shooting you
Laughing like villains, killing our brothers
Trolling in local, making them suffer
And I guess that's why we call them our blues

And I guess that's why we call them our blues

And I guess that's why we call them our blues

And I guess that's why we call them our blues

Blues

An Eve Online Parody.  With the recent influx of Alpha clones this week, I thought this song might be fitting.  Hope you enjoy :)

♥♥♥

I can show you our world
Shining, shimmering splendid
Tell me, Alpha, now when did
You last see your ship ignite?

I can open your eyes
Take you region by region
Tour all over New Eden
On a T1 frigate flight

A whole new Eve
For Alphas making their debut
GM's let scammers go
It's status quo
And don't permaban for griefing

A whole new Eve
Still need to fix my overview
But when I decloak here
And ships appear
Wish I was on a whole new grid with you
Now I'm on a whole new grid with you

Unbelievable sights
Ships and planets all shining
Warping , jumping, aligning
Through an endless diamond sky

A whole new Eve
(Comms are teeming with spais)
And forty thousand peeps to kill
(Hold your cloak, don't you lemming)
I'm like a shooting star
In my jaguar
I can't go back to games I used to play

A whole new Eve
(Every gank a surprise)
With shiny targets to pursue
(Every miner so tempting)
I'll chase them anywhere
There's time to spare
Let me share this whole new Eve with you

A whole new Eve
(A whole new Eve)
That's where we'll be
(That's where we'll be)
A thrilling chase
Through wondrous space
For you and me

A Whole New Eve

An Eve Online parody from the point of view of a new member of Signal Cartel.  Hope you enjoy!

♥♥♥

All those days flying round New Eden
All those roams looking for a fight
All that time I never even realised
Things weren't feeling right

Now I'm here, living by the credo
Now I'm here, snuggly and shy
Cloaked up here, it's all so clear
There's another way to fly

And at last I see the light
And it's like the salt has lifted
And at last I see the light
And it's like my path is clear
And my fireworks burn so bright
And my game has somehow shifted
All at once peaceful is appealing
As a Signaleer

All those days, hunting down my targets
Chasing tears, trying to belong
All that time, an uneasy feeling
I was doing wrong
Now I'm here, hugging with my snowballs
Now I'm here, never starting fights
Scanning here, it's crystal clear
Exploring's my delight

And at last I see the light
And it's like the salt has lifted
And I love the Signal life
And it's like my path is clear
And my fireworks burn so bright
And my game has somehow shifted
All at once peaceful is appealing
As a Signaleer
As a Signaleer

Signal Life

A catchy anthem for the solo pilots of Eve Online :)  Hope you like it!

♥♥♥

All the solo pilots
(All the solo pilots)
All the solo pilots
(All the solo pilots)
All the solo pilots
(All the solo pilots)
All the solo pilots
Everyone X up

In an anom, just logged on
Doing my own little thing
You decided to hit and now you wanna quit
'Cause I'm fit for PVP
I target you, you target me
You'd better be paying attention
'Cause you're scrammed and webbed, as good as dead,
You can't be mad at me

'Cause if you liked it, then you should have put a stab on it
If you liked it, then you should have put a stab on it
Don't be mad once you see what I've got fit
If you liked it, then you should have put a stab on it

Pew, pew, pew
Pew, pew, pew, pew, pew, pew
Pew, pew, pew
Pew, pew, pew
Pew, pew, pew, pew, pew, pew
Pew, pew, pew

'Cause if you liked it, then you should have put a stab on it 
If you liked it, then you should have put a stab on it
Don't be mad once you see what I've got fit
If you liked it, then you should have put a stab on it

I got skins on my ships, a troll on my lips
Hear the sound of my shields on fire
Acting tough, quafe in my cup
Watching as the damage ticks higher
I need no subscription, did I mention?
Don't pay them since ascension,
'Cause you tried to burn, but now you gon' learn
What it really feels like to expire

'Cause if you liked it, then you should have put a stab on it
If you liked it, then you should have put a stab on it
Don't be mad once you see what I've got fit
If you liked it, then you should have put a stab on it

Pew, pew, pew
Pew, pew, pew, pew, pew, pew
Pew, pew, pew
Pew, pew, pew
Pew, pew, pew, pew, pew, pew
Pew, pew, pew

'Cause if you liked it, then you should have put a stab on it
If you liked it, then you should have put a stab on it
Don't be mad once you see what I've got fit
If you liked it, then you should have put a stab on it

Pew, pew, pew
Pew, pew, pew, pew, pew, pew
Pew, pew, pew
Pew, pew, pew
Pew, pew, pew, pew, pew, pew
Pew, pew, pew

Don't offer me big ransoms to transfer
I'm not that kind of girl
Your corpse is what I prefer, what I deserve
Here's a man that whelps to me then helps me
Deliver him to his destiny, to infinity and beyond
Let me light up your pod
Coz you're the kill I want
But if you cry before you die
Then all your salt will live on

All the solo pilots
(All the solo pilots)
All the solo pilots
(All the solo pilots)
All the solo pilots
(All the solo pilots)
All the solo pilots
Everyone X up

Pew, pew, pew
Pew, pew, pew, pew, pew, pew
Pew, pew, pew
Pew, pew, pew
Pew, pew, pew, pew, pew, pew
Pew, pew, pew

'Cause if you liked it, then you should have put a stab on it
If you liked it, then you should have put a stab on it
Don't be mad once you see what I've got fit
If you liked it, then you should have put a stab on it
Pew, pew, pew

If you liked it, then you should have put a stab on it
If you liked it, then you should have put a stab on it
Don't be mad once you see what I've got fit
If you liked it, then you should have put a stab on it
Pew, pew, pew

Subira Hakuli

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