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(Broadus)

I used to wish to be invisible Now I can’t be seen 
Gotta be careful what you wish for Cos now I’m under the sea 
I am what i’ve created
Look out I know I’m hated 

Carry my feet they’re dragging behind 
When I look back I can’t even say I tried 
Like a moth to a flame I’m attracted to pain 
I burn up my wings then run back to the light
 
Too busy hallucinating ridicule To be myself 
I never made any action So I just wait on the shelf 
I’m drowning in my self reflection 
In this hall of mirrors I see my lack of affection 

In a constant state Dissecting 
Or is this obsession 
Tearing me apart 
Leaving nothing for collection down below 

Sinking low, 
Go

(Rivilin)

Take me, take me away,
Here I don't want to stay.
This place, this place betrays
The dreams you chase all day.

Lead me, lead me astray,
I just need, yeah, a break.
I can't, I can't delay,
Falling faster awake.

Yeah, it's this hollow world I find myself in.
The people that surround are just paper-thin.
Can I leave? Can I breathe outside?
No, no, they're scared to let me; they think I won't survive.

Damn, I guess it didn't make sense when I said the lake was filled with bodies.
When I got close, I saw their eyes open; their grief hits like a tsunami.
I stopped. The silence was deafening. The wind, it passed through me, it's beckoning
For me to walk further into their hands. They drag me down; I can't withstand.

I just look up as the water surrounds me, push out my limbs, but you know they'll never find me.
Down here, the ocean sky's so beautiful; if this is my grave, then I think it's suitable.
As I turn around, I look down below; the inky abyss wants to consume my soul.
I think I should try and swim, but my body just wants to let go.

And as I give in, the tide, it swells all around my head,
Shaking left to right, my vision blurs, imbues me with dread.
I try to explain it as I came to, waking on the shore.
This place isn't home, but I feel like I have been here before.

Take me, take me away,
Here I don't want to stay.
This place, this place betrays
The dreams you chase all day.

Lead me, lead me astray,
I just need, yeah, a break.
I can't, I can't delay,
Falling faster awake.

Down Below, Sinking Low

Rivilin Socials:
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https://soundcloud.com/rivilin
https://open.spotify.com/artist/3Zx6YOsYHf5uj5xvnNhhgL?si=4e6bdfa691f847a0

Broadus Socials:
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https://www.instagram.com/broadus972
https://soundcloud.com/broadus972
https://open.spotify.com/artist/7CIMNFNrpE8Ta9hMVhE162?si=wrNsDKQkTIieVuCQtanK6w

(Rivilin)

These waves are getting higher now,
I watch as they crash down,
Filling up the boat.
Soon it won't stay afloat.

I try to scream for help,
But the wind, it takes my yells.
Alone here by myself,
Has this place become my hell?

The storm's brewing from below,
The noise around just takes its toll.
I cannot sleep, I cannot eat,
Yeah, in this place I've become weak.

There, I see a small window,
Behind the glass shines a bright glow.
I'm reaching out, just take my hand,
Yeah, please don't leave me here again.

So I just fall from above,
Into your hands I dissolve.
I can't hear you, can't feel you,
Giving you trust is my fault.

The fire burns from inside,
Rinsing my skin with the lie.
I can't be you, I just fear you,
Watch me succumb to the tide.

(Broadus)

Breathe through me 
Need a second wind 
Baby breathe again
I’m out of oxygen

You were made for me 
but was I made for you 
Baby breathe again 
Need a second wind 

What do you do when the well runs dry 
make a sacrifice and tell me what is right 

Cos I been tryna figure out why you’re the one in the wrong 
Holding on 
For me to wake up 
Find the energy to walk on 

(We see)

Two different paths there’s a fork in the road 
I hope you know where you’re going 
Giving everything I got 
the only ones to notice are the voices saying that it’s all for naught
 
So jump straight into the deep end 
Burn every bridge, I sink in 
I rot and watch you grow 
You burn so bright it hurts to get close 

Breathe through me 
Need a second wind 
Baby breathe again
I’m out of oxygen

You were made for me 
but was I made for you 
Baby breathe again 
Need a second wind

Breathe Through Me

Rivilin Socials:
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https://www.instagram.com/RivilinOfficial/
https://soundcloud.com/rivilin
https://open.spotify.com/artist/3Zx6YOsYHf5uj5xvnNhhgL?si=4e6bdfa691f847a0

Broadus Socials:
https://www.broadusmusic.com/
https://www.instagram.com/broadus972
https://soundcloud.com/broadus972
https://open.spotify.com/artist/7CIMNFNrpE8Ta9hMVhE162?si=wrNsDKQkTIieVuCQtanK6w

(Rivilin)

Inside a telephone box, midnight is paused.
Fluorescent lights, yeah, they bring all the moths.
Smother my skin, pull out the veins,
Dragging me up until I don't remain.

My mind's coming to, I wake on the train,
Watch the graffiti, yeah, show all the stains.
Thinking they say, thinking they mean
Something that's important, but I can't see.

Yeah, from my feet, down on my knees,
Feel the pressure on my back from your cheek.
Lost in the screen on someone's TV,
I'm burnt in the pixels, remain there for free.

In a fever dream I remain,
Grimaced, disgusting faces, they change.
Looking at me for the answers they hate,
Only hear what they want, yeah, so they take and I break.

Lost in the moment; snap, shudder, and the blur takes its toll.
Seeking out atonement; yeah, the one you failed is your soul.
Lost in the moment, laid back on the water, sink low.
Filling out the enrollment, let the devil make you his own.

(Broadus)

Sitting in the drivers seat 
Pressin on the gas 
Going nowhere fast 
Maybe turn into the median 

And let life flash 
Cos that’s all I’m doing anyways 
I let life pass me by 
Driving teary eyed

I feel my boys hand on my shoulder 
Tellin me slow down 
Cos I’m 110 on the highway 
And I’m screaming out 

Feel the knife twist in my stomach 
As my lungs are giving out 
Knowing it’s over for now 
While I’m laying on the ground 

What a comfort sitting here and bleeding out 
Sobering to know that I won’t be the dream 
There’s a freedom on the other side I haven’t seen 
Just hope I find it before the devil makes me 


(Rivlin)

Lost in the moment; snap, shudder, and the blur takes its toll.
Seeking out atonement; yeah, the one you failed is your soul.
Lost in the moment, laid back on the water, sink low.
Filling out the enrollment, let the devil make you his own.

Telelphone Box

Rivilin Socials:
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https://soundcloud.com/rivilin
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Broadus Socials:
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https://www.instagram.com/broadus972
https://soundcloud.com/broadus972
https://open.spotify.com/artist/7CIMNFNrpE8Ta9hMVhE162?si=wrNsDKQkTIieVuCQtanK6w

(Rivilin)


I fall now through the air so slow,
My head aches from the pain below.
I see them, yeah, they smile and taunt,
As they beckon me to just jump off.

What I don't get, yeah, is why I hurt,
Try to wait it out, but it just gets worse.
As I take the last step forward now,
Feel the wind call as I just look down.

Then I wake up in this bed again,
Thought I'd died there, I guess it's in my head.
Just repeating, yeah, these awful thoughts,
But I won't go, 'cause I'm too scared of...

Coming back now and it being worse.
We're in hell here; we just repeat this curse.
Feel neglected, we don't have a spine,
I can't find a home to just call mine.

So please, just let me not wake up,
I beg you, yeah, for this to stop.
This cycle of constant self-neglect,
It's my fault, but how do I change it?

And I don't know, maybe I need rest,
Just a break from the pain that's in my chest.
Will I wake up one day with a smile?
Say I'm happy just to be alive?

(Broadus)

Oh I never thought 
That I would be back up against the wall 
Living on borrowed time 
For years I been fighting against the clock 

Against the odds I seem to stay alive 
Maybe it’s a blessing from the heavens 
Or just sheer luck 
Lately I been stuck 

Cos if I got a greater purpose I been fresh out of direction 
I don’t know which way to head Maybe I’m better off without one 
Recently I been stressin about my sleep I cannot function 
Momma say I’m here for a reason I’m self destructing 

Still lookin for the magic pill to fix my problems 
Allergic to accountability can you pull me right out 
I’m wasting all my time I’m running out of options (oh options)

Can I kill the part of my mind holding me back 
So maybe one day I’ll get my life on track 


(Rivilin)

So please, just let me not wake up,
I beg you, yeah, for this to stop.
This cycle of constant self-neglect,
It's my fault, but how do I change it?

And I don't know, maybe I need rest,
Just a break from the pain that's in my chest.
Will I wake up one day with a smile?
Say I'm happy just to be alive?

I Beg You

Rivilin Socials:
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https://www.instagram.com/RivilinOfficial/
https://soundcloud.com/rivilin
https://open.spotify.com/artist/3Zx6YOsYHf5uj5xvnNhhgL?si=4e6bdfa691f847a0

Broadus Socials:
https://www.broadusmusic.com/
https://www.instagram.com/broadus972
https://soundcloud.com/broadus972
https://open.spotify.com/artist/7CIMNFNrpE8Ta9hMVhE162?si=wrNsDKQkTIieVuCQtanK6w

(Broadus)

Not here awake when you take the wheel 
I’m crashing out I need to feel 
Never wanted you part of me 
I see a monster in the weeds 

I’m clawing out I need to breathe 
This skin I wear I shed to see 
Never wanted you part of me 
Two sides of the same coin is all I see 

(Rivilin)

Late night, it's like I'm talking to myself.
In the daytime, it just resets and I forget.
Becoming sublime with the image of myself,
Until I see the reflection and everything just starts to fester in my chest.

Dig it down, dig it down a little bit more,
Try to find something more than this emptiness in my core.
Until I see a picture that I drew when I was a kid,
See the memories come back when everything was just bliss.

But that's it, that's just how it works, isn't it?
When we get a bit old, your body gets slower
And you get colder to everyone around you, yeah, thinking that they don't care.
Is it so hard to open up now that you live in despair?

Damn man, when did we get so low?
I didn't want to be something you towed
Around, like a burden strapped to your neck.
I'm sick of me; I think it's best that I just leave.

(Broadus)

Not here awake when you take the wheel 
I’m crashing out I need to feel 
Never wanted you part of me 
I see a monster in the weeds 

I’m clawing out I need to breathe 
This skin I wear I shed to see 
Never wanted you part of me 
Two sides of the same coin is all I see

Shed

Rivilin Socials:
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Broadus Socials:
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https://open.spotify.com/artist/7CIMNFNrpE8Ta9hMVhE162?si=wrNsDKQkTIieVuCQtanK6w

(Broadus)

Find the weight of my mistakes 
It’s buried under nothing Cos I’m a fake 

Or did I make up what I thought was my make up  
Got a smeared smoky eye on my spirit 
Take a wipe to everything I decide to hide behind 
It’s been clear to me for days 

I’m not trying anymore 
Gotta shed my skin to grow 
Make an appearance in a month 
So that they know I’m not a ghost 

Alleviate my growing pains 
Walk with me as I mourn the pieces of me that I embraced 
It’s easier to hate me over making a case 
As I fall apart I look at me with disgrace 

(Rivilin)

So wait, til the moon just sings my name
We just change, as we always point the blame
It's so strange, how you say that we're the same
I don't care, watch my head just burst in flames

Place my feet gently in the snow
Let a footprint define my way back home

It's like the memories are there but the faces just blur
Every time I try to recall, I just get hurt
The cloud is just inside of me, it's swelling in my chest
I think it's called anxiety, it doesn't let me rest

And then it stops. Was it time? I think so.
It's best to keep moving, let the pain burn slow
You keep it inside as it festers and grows
The misery you face and struggle with, yeah, alone

So I stay here, two worlds apart
I don't know how it ends but I remember how it starts
Plunge in the depths of the endless sky
Enter the abyss, make it out alive

So wait, til the moon just sings my name
We just change, as we always point the blame
It's so strange, how you say that we're the same
I don't care, watch my head just burst in flames

Going Under

Rivilin Socials:
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https://soundcloud.com/rivilin
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Broadus Socials:
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https://soundcloud.com/broadus972
https://open.spotify.com/artist/7CIMNFNrpE8Ta9hMVhE162?si=wrNsDKQkTIieVuCQtanK6w

(Rivilin)

I need a medic, trapped under rubble, feel like they don't get it
At the same time, I don't want to look pathetic
Reaching out for help, but they think it's poetic
Wishing for a bullet to the brain, yeah, fuck, I said it

Always try to explain that it's more than sleep I'm chasing
But life just wants to dangle me around like I'm a plaything
Set the house ablaze, I guess this fire I am embracing
Until my skin just turns to charcoal, I'm not worth saving

So what have I done?
Feel the needles enter my gums.

I just hate me, erase me,
Put a Glock to my temple, no, I don't want you to save me.
Break me and change me,
If I look into the mirror, will I know, yeah, who will face me?

(Broadus)

You don’t understand my motives
Told me I’m a waste of space 
Pulling out the vice grips 
but I’m out pacing my pain 

See I’m living for a mission 
Can’t build up without attrition 
Separate all the repression 
to force out the contradictions 

Never back down never what 
Give up 
Call my bluff I prove em wrong 
Ignite the character created with the flaws 

Success or death is all that’s left for me 
Stressin heavily 
Time to test my tensity 
A savior was never an option 

(Rivilin)

I just hate me, erase me,
Put a Glock to my temple, no, I don't want you to save me.
Break me and change me,
If I look into the mirror, will I know, yeah, who will face me?

Chasing Sleep

Rivilin Socials:
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https://soundcloud.com/rivilin
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Broadus Socials:
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https://soundcloud.com/broadus972
https://open.spotify.com/artist/7CIMNFNrpE8Ta9hMVhE162?si=wrNsDKQkTIieVuCQtanK6w

(Rivilin)

As I entered this building
By the train stop from before
I didn't know where I was going or how to explain it
But I knew this was now my home

A little hole,
Four walls and a bathroom
About 3 meters wide on the thirteenth floor
They said if I go any higher, they'll capture your soul, like woah

I went up but I can't return,
The way down's blocked but I'm not concerned
As I go on, things just start to change
Everything distorts around with hate

There's a smiling face, yeah, blocking the way
From the roof to the floor and it's calling my name
I guess just accept what is real, what's not
He opens his mouth, I enter, I'm gone

I didn't get, didn't get it, guess I'll just accept it
Can't tell what's up from down, is my life fact or fiction?
The walls, they speak, they say you have a mental illness
I try to get some help but to them, you're just business

I didn't make it, didn't make it, guess your life's just wasted
Can't see the truth from lies, your body's been vacated
Your skin, it turns to stone, all you can do is accept it
There's no one home for you, it's not what you expected

(Broadus)

I guess I’ll sit here accept my fate 
As a waste 
Another minute
the hours turn into days 

In a daze 
I’m drunk off sleep deprivation and a lack of motivation 
To carry on 
I sit in this room, erode

They ask, got nothing to show
With or without me life keeps rolling 
let’s get back on the road 
Oh but where is my hope 

While you’re crushing my throat 
It’s hard to breathe through a choke 
Today let’s just stay afloat 

Oh
It is what it was

(Rivilin)

I didn't get, didn't get it, guess I'll just accept it
Can't tell what's up from down, is my life fact or fiction?
The walls, they speak, they say you have a mental illness
I try to get some help but to them, you're just business

I didn't make it, didn't make it, guess your life's just wasted
Can't see the truth from lies, your body's been vacated
Your skin, it turns to stone, all you can do is accept it
There's no one home for you, it's not what you expected

Crushed Throat

Rivilin Socials:
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https://soundcloud.com/rivilin
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Broadus Socials:
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https://www.instagram.com/broadus972
https://soundcloud.com/broadus972
https://open.spotify.com/artist/7CIMNFNrpE8Ta9hMVhE162?si=wrNsDKQkTIieVuCQtanK6w

(Rivilin)

Yeah, you're buzzing on my intercom, I see your face in the camera, is it really you?
Yeah,  thought that you were gone, at least that's what I knew when I saw you at your funeral.
When I opened up that door, where'd you go?  gotta embrace the usual.
A panic attack alone, until I lock down and I become unusable.

The perspectives start to fade, seeing myself at the bottom of a hole with the faces
Judging why I changed, didn't wanna stay, the pain just got unbearable.
My vision starts to sway, as I'm just stuck in the house where the fire's burning.
Hollowed out and decayed, I'm feeling betrayed and you know I'm never learning.

The stars come down to pick me up, they hang me by their strings.
The ghosts come out to return home, their mellow voice still stings.
I'm watching down from the rooftop, I see you fly away on wings.
But I'm left here now all alone, I don't know how to explain things.

(Broadus)

Let me go we’re fighting time 
It’s our lives they’re on the line 
Every moment of the climb 
Let’s me know that I’m alive 

Know that I’m alive 
One day I’ll be fine 

I couldn’t be there in the room when they said they were letting go 
I closed my eyes to feel but all I hear is machines 
(I know you’re not)
I’m scared of vulnerability 
Stealing attention onto me 

Walking on down to the lobby
Regret for not grieving the same 
Sitting alone 
It’s genetic that I don’t ask for help

Too consumed with feeling anything 
So I push away 
The stars come down to forgive me 
I’ve never been a perfect man 

Do you look down proud of me 
At who I have become 
I’m hoping one day I can see 
What you saw in me 

Cos Life seem to just pass me by 
I don’t know how to explain me 

Let me go we’re fighting time 
It’s our lives they’re on the line 
Every moment of the climb 
Let’s me know that I’m alive 

Know that I’m alive 
One day I’ll be fine

Return Home

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Vile卑劣 - I've Tried Everything And Still I Can't Find Myself

Self produced / Sad  

CONTACT: RIVILINAU@GMAIL.COM

New tracks tagged #NuMetalcore