manga for cover art: misu misou

[lyrics]
everything hurts but i gotta keep it moving
dying everyday and i dont know what im doing
days go by never see the sunset
its always night fall wonder am i dead yet?
cant catch a breathe
now i wanna die
balling up a fist
i just wanna feel alive
sick of everybody that wanna be sad
wanna disappear and ill never come back

anxiety clutching my chest
freaking out im just doing my best
paranoid i dont think this is real
confused i dont know how to feel

same dreams same nightmares
dead nights and youre right there
same tears same headaches
dead body so why i feel this heartache?
(x2)

everything hurts and its only getting worse
miss the days that i didnt even feel hurt
but its all gone why do i go recollect?
ima go and snap my neck from reading all these fucking texts
self destructive
its my fault
my head that im stuck in i cant call
but i hope youre doing alright 
can i see you one last time?

anxiety clutching my chest
freaking out im just doing my best
paranoid i dont think this is real
confused i dont know how to feel

same dreams same nightmares
dead nights and youre right there
same tears same headaches
dead body so why i feel this heartache?
(x4)

too many headaches

manga for cover art: jinrou game: beast side

[lyrics]

it's so loud when I'm alone
but the thing is that I'm never talking
everywhere I go and it never feels like home
pass by the ghost thats always stalking
confronting my demons just to get left on seen
feeling dead inside my life it's like I'm stuck in between
I don't wanna give up but I'm hurting 
staring in the mirror but I'm there still searching 

time goes by and it's going faster
tryna stay alive but I'm getting sadder
and I don't wanna have any regrets
life goes by like my cigarette
(X2)

waking up and I feel like I'm dying 
always disappointed I'm so sick of trying 
everyone is smiling but I'm not 
I'll just stay inside my room and rot
okay
not a good person like everyone thinks 
hating everything until the moment that I sleep
walking with a frown and nothing but a dead stare 
hate to break it to you but I honestly don't care 

time goes by and it's going faster
tryna stay alive but I'm getting sadder
and I don't wanna have any regrets
life goes by like my cigarette
(X2)

monsters dont have reflections

@xcelestia

manga for cover art: jinrou game

[lyrics]
feeling miserable today
same thing as yesterday
dealing with this shit like it's clock work and I can't wait to finally go away 
another 24 another headache
another 7 days I don't wanna be awake
take me to the gallows and I'll hang with the trees
you can throw me to the birds so I can find peace
never ending nightmares on my mind 
I don't really wanna waste my time 
been there done that I don't wanna go back 
I just wanna fix my fucking life 
dealing with my problems you don't know
walking down this road and I'm all alone 
everything's dark and I can't see shit
I just really hope that my life ends quick 

baby it's true
baby it's true
everything I feel
baby it's true
(X2)

[celestia]
trying to taste little bits of heaven 
i felt it in my body
time to reassure the damage 
this is how it was before you met them
so insecure oh caring is a damn chore baby
this is how our lives are shaped
just give it one more day 
times just been slow lately
this is enough
this is enough
i'm driving so fast
there is no looking back
you act like there was a past 
this is enough 
this is enough

still searching w/ celestia

produced and mastered by demxntia
@demxntia
@sushisai

cover for manga: misumisou

[lyrics]
grinding on my teeth
turn it into dust
everything is bleak
turning into rust 
down again
I can't breathe
down again
with my heart on my sleeve 
breaking these ties I just wanna go
troubled thoughts in my head got me slow 
I can't find shelter 
from myself

talking to myself censored words what the fucks wrong
angry voices in my head why my nights feel so long 
static in my mind
silence in my room
the wind is howling loud
what am I to do 

[suisai]
somethings so wrong when you're so used to
being controlled
rolling ever so slowly
down that broken road
think is there any place here left to go
see the sudden shift in
winds that used to howl
changes coming quicker
tho theres so much left to see
wish i wasnt such a coward
stuck in my own shadow
is this really how it has to be

talking to myself censored words what the fucks wrong
angry voices in my head why my nights feel so long 
static in my mind
silence in my room
the wind is howling loud
what am I to do 

[demxntia]
I don't know how long I can keep this front
I have a habit of breaking everything I touch 
I don't know myself as well as the mirrors does
always say I do but I don't
I don't wanna waste time no more
spend another night inside of my head 
I just wanna make it right for you
at least that what I'll say
excuses never go through

talking to myself censored words what the fucks wrong
angry voices in my head why my nights feel so long 
static in my mind
silence in my room
the wind is howling loud
what am I to do 
(X2)

silence w/ suisai & demxntia

re-uploaded from the beginning of june, i accidentally deleted a week later but this is one of my fav songs so ya

manga for cover: jinrou game beast side

[lyrics]
phantom in the moonlight
fixated shadows eye adjust am i alright?
silhouette reside in the doorway
lungs hurt eyes sore stuck for the shadow play

i cannot feel my sorrows
numb again i dont wanna see tomorrow
i dont know everything seems wrong
my days are getting shorter but they seem long
i dont really wanna die today
everybody does but i dont feel that way
cant move, but im okay 
i know, the moment just moves slow

phantom in the moonlight
fixated shadows eye adjust am i alright?
silhouette reside in the doorway
lungs hurt eyes sore stuck for the shadow play

room slow motion heart pacing fast
tryna scream for help even if its just a gasp
i dont think anyones gonna be there
laying by myself but i know that theres something there
another freakout another nightmare
reaching for my phone but i know that youre not there
cant breathe, but im okay
i know, the moment just moves slow

phantom in the moonlight
fixated shadows eye adjust am i alright?
silhouette reside in the doorway
lungs hurt eyes sore stuck for the shadow play
(x2)

sleep paralysis

w/ @demxntia

produced and mastered by demxntia

manga: flowers of evil

lyrics

down fall 
crawling through the trenches better through
and I got you and I won't stop
always sitting on my mind and I won't stop
doing everything because you're worth it
but I'm burning
turn into something i don't wanna be but you're worth it and I'll do it all again because 

frozen winds always break me down but I break down shards like a glass wall
stuck in rooms indecisive 
stabbing backs I'm rising tryna figure it out 
but everything a bleed out and I need out everybody keep out 
I don't wanna be the best I just wanna be enough for you
all along the paths in this road
darkness follows me where I go
and I'm waiting
and you know that 
I'm just waiting for a chance 
bleed out
now I'm knocked out
I just wanna be the best for you

down fall 
crawling through the trenches better through
and I got you and I won't stop
always sitting on my mind and I won't stop
doing everything because you're worth it
but I'm burning
turn into something I don't wanna be but you're worth it and I'll do it all again because

[demxntia]
wanna go back
back to the place i once knew
back wen i was still w/ u
feelings so cold got nothing to lose nah
follow the tracks
words that i couldn't retract
everything i coulda had
but nothing ever last
something is missing tonight
can't fill the void in my life
im at the end of the road
with nowhere left to go
and i can't see the light nah
drifts around my head

down fall 
crawling through the trenches better through
and I got you and I won't stop
always sitting on my mind and I won't stop
doing everything because you're worth it
but I'm burning
turn into something I don't wanna be but you're worth it and I'll do it all again because

downfall w/ demxntia

prod. @demxntia

[lyrics]

im right here but youre still so far
through the looking glass youre just a fallen star
ill be here when you come back
even when my whole worlds black
(x2)

i know that youre there but youre never around
been too long and i wonder will you ever be found?
wander through the void when i first wake up
sick of everybody and the space theyre taking up
night time hollowed out got me moving slow
static on the screen just another show
error, nightmare i dont like the terror
been going on forever its whatever
i just wanna find you

im right here but youre still so far
through the looking glass youre just a fallen star
ill be here when you come back
even when my whole worlds black
(x2)

passed out again with some dreams of you
and i know that you hate it but shit me too
and i know that youre worried and i know that you care
everything is stagnant and youre still not there
just another movie with a bad sequel
im the reoccurring dream that doesnt make sense
always good intentions never feel evil
just a reoccurring cycle and i want it to end

im right here but youre still so far
through the looking glass youre just a fallen star
ill be here when you come back
even when my whole worlds black
(x2)

gg i guess [prod. demxntia]

produced by @demxntia

manga for cover art: goodnight world

[lyrics]

most nights hung up on myself with the self loathe 
heart gone froze skin cracked will you let me go?
drunk nights got me fucked up in a daze now
empty hollowed out I'm moving slow with the hate now

I can't feel regret if I'm always numbs
I can't feel my pain if my beer is done
I can't face my problems if I'm gonna run
night time always see the moon never see the sun
I don't even know where I go 
sometimes I think Im psycho
cause everybody wanna die but they don't even know
ay I don't wanna fail again
I don't understand how I move thru this pain ay

most nights hung up on myself with the self loathe 
heart gone froze skin cracked will you let me go?
drunk nights got me fucked up in a daze now
empty hollowed out I'm moving slow with the hate now
(X2)

another night another can another laugh
I don't think I'm happy and I kinda wanna go back
everything sucked but at least I had plans
now I'm just stuck and I hate who I am
I don't wanna try what's the point it all crashes down
back inside my room I wanna cry but nothing's coming out
don't pay me any mind I'm a bother I'm not worth your time
don't say youre there cause I know I'm sick of all the lies

most nights hung up on myself with the self loathe 
heart gone froze skin cracked will you let me go?
drunk nights got me fucked up in a daze now
empty hollowed out I'm moving slow with the hate now
(X3)

demons bro haha vices [prod. demxntia]

mastered by @demxntia

[lyrics]

everything is dark and im roaming without a heart and im running out of time and i cant even see the light
can you help me?
can anybody help me?
(x2)

tired all the time i dont wanna do this again
everybody fine but im waiting for it to end
i know im not the best person
i know why im always hurting
self destructive acts but its my fault
i been always waiting its my downfall
kinda look like im just a masochist
i dont wanna wake up after this

can this all just end? (x2)

everything is dark and im roaming without a heart and im running out of time and i cant even see the light
can you help me?
can anybody help me?
(x2)

i just drank some alcohol cause im fucked up
i be doing it all the time cause im fucked up
drinking away all my sorrows
if i go to sleep i dont wanna see tomorrow
everything is faded colors all i see is gray
i dont really care i never feel okay
motion blur toggled on my sight
wish i was kidding but i hate my life

can this all just end? (x2)

everything is dark and im roaming without a heart and im running out of time and i cant even see the light
can you help me?
can anybody help me?
(x2)

drowning myself

prod. @demxntia

[lyrics]

i could walk a thousand steps under the sea
deep void pitch black i dont ever get sleep
stay haunted, livin a nightmare
blade in the tuck dont give a fuck i dont fight fair
(x2)

i dont even know where i be going broe
everybody toe to toe cause everybodys moving slow
and everybody wanna fuck up everything i see
cause everything i see is always fucked up and then they see
"i just wanna see how u doing now"
well i dont wanna fucking tell u bitch
"why you sound like you always down?"
can i get a fucking breather quick?

i could walk a thousand steps under the sea
deep void pitch black i dont ever get sleep
stay haunted, livin a nightmare
blade in the tuck dont give a fuck i dont fight fair
(x2)

another day everything is different
everybody stay the same but everybody moving different
i be on the ground but they be up in the clouds
and i be telling the truth but im just bringing them down
posted in my room getting drunk again drunk again
and i dont give a fuck cause i wanna get fucked up again
fucking hate this shit i dont think i wanna do it broe
kinda wanna quit whats the move whats my motive tho

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