I'm Hip-Hop now and I can't believe it
My bar's bulimic, spit SARS Ischemic
Trancendental meditation
I hand this mental head a brain
Tonnes of dumb puns
Scum lines the surface
I'm kind and worthless
I curse the curt words and cursive verses 
Kurt the Angle, I hurt my ankle
Same old walk, same old talk, same old blame
Say my name, say my name, say my name
Become estranged, I feel the pain, deal with pain, 
Then I leave this plane
Fein amusement, inane recusant 
Big old words, big old turds
Diarrhoea, I try to be a dimorphous
Am I a tortoise?

Am I A Tortoise?

I go on the same walk all day
I stalk the same trail without fail
I pale in comparison
Impaled with the caliber
Zero percent
A hero resents the task at hand
I ask and can, receive at will
Believe in kill or be hiding
And still I'm residing in my mind
Inviting in every frequency, stopping you
Believing's impossible
Never mind what's in the 'the'
He sees what he wants to see
Eye's roll backwards
And I'm so fractured, across the board
I drop my sword and move sideways
I proved my days, aren't meant for this
Defend my mistakes, one to ten
Again and again
I lent all my friends my cartridges
They harboured Miss Pac Man
That's Sam for ya
Cram for homework
Get in the zone first
No chance, dance around the bush
Beating out the trust
Mustn't feel the need
Crushing in my knees
Keeling over, feeling bloated
Even Coke isn't that sweet anymore
Even jokes won't make me crease anymore
They're chore
Went for more of the same change
Play the blame game, inane, the pain's staying, I aim to fein Range
But I'm a VW Fox
I see trouble and rot away the memories
As if they were never meant to be

Same Walk

I woke up this morning
So bored so coarse 
So for the par
Ha ha ha
Laugh chard tar off of my lungs
Quitting smoking, voting and boasting about both 
In time to line my mind, with what signs I find 
They're everywhere you look
If you don't give a fuck about trying
Dining out on Mayan sacrifices
Hacking off the nicest eyelids
I combine with ripened sliced figs
Vice grip my dick, try to spit on it

Too pornographic

Soon swarms of Satanic imagery begins to speak to my soul
And I leech off the whole cold affair
Put a rolled snare there:
Werewolves and Succubi, trust a lie 
Fry up some do or die
Consume it whole, or at least try to provide some explanation
Let the patience, satiate my flagrant disregard for anything
Other than bar, bar, bar
Place your bets
Hedge your ward, off the state of mind
That leaves you binding with shrines you worship
Am I working or hurting?
Self assured or berserk
In a dearth of absurd chirping of people outside too doubtful to try
The lines behind this one, that express the opposite
Perspire with tired friction and regress to the stop and quit

HAHAHA < BARBARBAR

How do I feel?
I'm making a meal
Taking the real
Inpatient, I seal
Myself right up
I slide my guts
Outta my throat
I'm hiding my hopes
Surprising my jokes
Just don't land
I trust my hands
To push my plans
Across the pad
I dropped my hat
Where did it go?
Tearing my flows
Outta my bones
Tonight when I'm home
I'm fighting my dome
Excited by post
The dark web's not the farfetched scheme I thought it'd be
But now that I'm free, to be a B-U-M
Believe, me and a real Emcee are one in the same
Forgotten my name
I'm toppling Bane
Hopping on flames
Locking my aim
Chopping your veins
Stopping my sane
Cock and I came
Optimus Pr[a]me
Often I'm Slain
Hocking up Blaine
David, save it — I'm magical

toppling bane

I got too drunk at the weekend again, seeing my friends
Revealing all my dents inside my head, I wind up dead
I fried my bread with a wedge of lead
I hedge my bets and I set my nets — but nothing gets caught
So I bought more shorts and the sun went out
I don't mean down, but I'm coping now
And I'm hoping cows know when it rains
Cos when I complain, I run to stay in one place all day
Say what you want about the last verse
Play in reverse it reveals a curse
Hit you with a hex and a death threat next
Remove your neck and get your solar plexus wet
Those were battle bars, just to fill the space
Have a laugh at stars, just to feel my place
I can't feel my face, wait

Hip-hop
It is hip-hop I assure you
I hate to bore you, I pour you
A drink

Drink?

Yeah motherfucker it must be me
I'm killing Emcees every single D
I put the A and the Y after that
I'm sorry motherfucker but I have to rap

What

I spent the weekend drowning
Around the sound of mountains
Made out of mole hills
Taking its toll still
Waiting for the mould to grow old
I fold my clothes in my bag
I'm glad to see the back of the past
As fast as I can, I grab my plans 
And tear them in two
Caring is proof that daring to do
Has nothing to do with you at all
I fall through the days of my get away
Only to return to the ferns 
That are burnt on my memories
Forever me
Whatever we did or didn't do is nothing new
Stuffing you down and out of site
That's my right, to come round for a pint
And disappear as fast as I arrived

I'm sorry motherfucker but I have to rap
And that's a fact, I grab my bag
And dash out the door, like a flash in the pan
On a catamaran, and I'm grabbing my plans
And I'm tearing them in two

hav2rap

I feel so sad but I'm glad that my shit's so bat
Cos the map that blasts past a mastermind's crime committing 
And I'm admitting a sublime indifference glistens with every incision
Spit on more than I chew, save it for later
An allegory, you're Halle Boring, I'm Halle Berry, Spit Hari-Kari
Very Melly — sideshow, I find no way out of a shroud of proud boys 
Toy with choice, moist cupcakes, for fuck's sake 
Crush steaks with my friends, pretend again when the pen hits the pad
Then lift a tadpoles cold soul over a toaster made out of grandad's loafers
A whole host of precocious flows blow noxious gasses out of my asses
It's fantastic, I've got two bums, who comes? who goes?
Pull a cool  gauche pose, google gauche so the lines make sense
The grind hates Ben, the clock, the car, the Jerry that goes with it
I drop the bar and buried the whole visage of every line I've ever written

Tax Purpose