Do you feel like you are the only person in your life who knows how to do anything correctly?&nbsp; Have you ever asked your partner or your teenager to do something, and they come back with “But you do it so much better…” or “I don’t know how…” OR wait so long to start that you just end up doing it?&nbsp; What if the people in your life are pretending to be less competent than they are to get you to do more than your share? Let that sink in.&nbsp; If you are overworking, overdoing, and, if you’re honest, resentful and burnt out, you might want to learn about strategic (or weaponized) incompetence. In today’s podcast, I break down this manipulation tactic and share how you can begin to step back from overfunctioning and move towards a more equitable distribution of labor in your life. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/378

378 Beyond Exhausted? Strategic Incompetence Might Be to Blame

Are you a nice person? Do you think it’s possible to be too nice? Or that wanting to be nice is an excuse some high-functioning codependents hide behind to avoid conflict? In my personal and professional experience, it is possible to be too nice, and it’s not great for your relationships.&nbsp; In this episode, we’ll explore what it means to be nice, what being too nice looks like, why it matters, and how to shift your behavior to authentic niceness. Read the show notes for today's episode at

714 Being Nice to Avoid Conflict Isn’t Nice, It’s Controlling - Here’s Why

I'm so happy to have my pal Michelle Chalfant on the show to celebrate her new book, The Adult Chair: Get Unstuck, Claim Your Power, and Transform Your Life! Michelle has been a therapist and life coach for the last 25 years and this book is the culmination of her work and experience with both her clients and herself. The Adult Chair model is an amazing way to cultivate self-knowledge throughout all phases of development and become more authentically you and who you want to be.&nbsp; We talked about why self-worth needs to be in place to set healthy boundaries, why triggers are a gift and what we can learn from them, how to shift into empowerment and so much more. Read the show notes for today's episode at

715 Get Unstuck and Transform Your Life with Michelle Chalfant

Do you struggle with setting boundaries because it feels selfish or wrong to put your preferences or needs first?&nbsp; Do you inadvertently trample on other people’s boundaries? (Hyper-helping, auto-advice giving, etc.) Or are you a newly identified high-functioning codependent (HFC) wondering why it’s especially tough to set boundaries? Then you’re in the right place. In this episode, I am breaking down why it’s challenging to set, stick to, and respect other people’s boundaries, particularly as HFCs. This is part one, and in part two (coming next week), we’ll cover boundary scripts and the different types of boundaries you might want to consider setting. Read the show notes for today's episode at

716 Disordered Boundaries + High-Functioning Codependency: What You Need to Know

I am so excited to have Selena Soo, my pal and publicity &amp; marketing strategist, on the show to talk about her new book, Rich Relationships: Create a Million Dollar Network For Your Small Business. These tips apply to ALL our relationships, too!&nbsp; Selena was the person I turned to in the very beginning stages of my online business, and her advice changed the way I looked at building professional relationships. I can't wait for you to hear her wisdom and start applying it! She shared the 5 types of rich relationships entrepreneurs need and the 6 circles of connection framework that we can use to help us navigate relationships without resentment.&nbsp; Selena is also offering the first 4 chapters of the book for free: https://richrelationshipsbook.com/terricole PLUS relationship building scripts and a chance to win $1,000! Read the show notes for today's episode at

717 Creating Rich Relationships with Selena Soo

Do you ever wonder when it’s appropriate to set a boundary? Or do you wish you knew what boundaries to set? Maybe unhealthy behavior was normalized in your family of origin, making it difficult to know when a request is “reasonable.” If so, this episode is for you. It’s the second in a two-part series about boundaries and high-functioning codependency (HFC). In this one, we’re covering the five types of boundaries, three boundary styles, and tips for when to set a boundary and how to do it. You can catch Part 1 here, where we covered boundary basics and talked about the unique challenges HFCs have in setting boundaries. Read the show notes for today's episode at

718 Disordered Boundaries + High-Functioning Codependency: What You Need to Know (Part 2)

I am so excited to have my new pal, couples therapist and author Dené Logan, on the show to talk about her new book, Sovereign Love: A Guide to Healing Relationships by Reclaiming the Masculine and Feminine Within.&nbsp; There's a lot of misunderstanding when it comes to the masculine and feminine, and Dené does an amazing job of breaking this concept down.&nbsp; We also shared our experiences with codependency in relationships and the importance of taking responsibility for our part in things (which includes understanding what activates you and being able to talk about it).&nbsp; Dené offered so much wisdom in this conversation and I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. Read the show notes for today's episode at

719 Healing Relationships with Couples Therapist Dené Logan

Every close relationship hits turbulence at some point. Conflict is inevitable.&nbsp; That’s why the real magic of secure, emotionally mature relationships isn’t about avoiding conflict. It’s about having the tools to come back together and repair. Repair requires us to be proactive because the work needs to begin long before it is actually needed. You can’t build a bridge in the middle of a storm (aka, a conflict). Having the ability to repair after disconnection or disagreements is everything. In this episode, I’m teaching you how to create a repair kit so you can prepare to handle conflict much more productively. Read the show notes for today's episode at&nbsp;

728 Heal After Conflict (Step-by-Step Repair Kit Inside!)

Do you notice micro changes in people’s facial expressions and ask yourself, “What did I do wrong?” Are you able to sit with someone in pain without trying to fix them? Are you so emotionally attuned to everything and everyone that you feel exhausted? If any of this sounds familiar, you’re not broken; you just lack the skills (boundaries!) needed to embrace your superpower (being an empath). You can care, love, and feel deeply without losing yourself in someone’s pain, which is what I’m talking about in this episode. I hope it helps you hit pause on taking on people’s emotions and gives you the tools you need to manage your energy. Read the show notes from today's episode at

730 Empath Boundaries

I'm thrilled to welcome my close pal, Jennifer Pastiloff, back to the show to celebrate the release of her new book, Proof of Life: Let Go, Let Love, and Stop Looking for Permission to Live Your Life. It's a call to arms to stop self-abandoning and no longer wait for permission, which I think is perfect for this community. ❤️ Jen has such a unique voice and wonderful sense of humor, and in this girlfriend jam, we talk about shame loss, Jen's inspiration for the subtitle, and how she is really living what she's writing about. It's so inspiring and empowering.&nbsp; Watch to the end because she also shares a beautiful poem for those who feel like they're constantly behind. I think you'll love it!&nbsp; P.S. Jen's TEDx Talk, Nothing You Do Is Wrong: https://youtu.be/_-RlIS9JbhM?si=fU2V8AuP6CvlqzSw Read the show notes for today's episode at

735 How to Let Go and Let Love with Jennifer Pastiloff

Have you been going through life confused about why the people you trust always seem to let you down? Or do you avoid trusting anyone because you aren’t sure who deserves it? You might have learned disordered trust patterns from your family of origin. On today’s episode, I’m sharing some strategies for identifying patterns that don’t serve you and getting clarity on who deserves a space in the front row of your life. Read the show notes for today's episode at

738 How Your Childhood Trust Blueprint Affects Every Relationship (And What to Do About It)

Terri Cole is a licensed psychotherapist, transformation coach, and expert at turning Fear into Freedom. Helping people all over the world face their fears, get unstuck from the past, move past their limiting beliefs, and start living the lives they desire.

This show is for anyone who wants to learn more about practical psychology, achieving personal freedom, self-improvement, meditation, mindfulness practices, harnessing the power of intention, and real-life strategies for personal transformation.

Episodes feature expert interviews, discussions, Terri's observations, listener Q&A, and how to apply practical strategies to create more freedom in all areas of your life.

378 Beyond Exhausted? Strategic Incompetence Might Be to Blame

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