This is Apocalympdik.  It is badass, 'nuff said.

Apocalympdik

This is an Elvis Presley song, and I humbly apologize to purists who might be upset with this rendition....just kidding, y'all go to Graceland like he still lives there.

If I Can Dream

Da Great Pierpont Song Heist

Saint James Infirmary Blues -- uh.....sort of.  We really went somewhere else.

Saint James

This is an instrumental track to listen to when you are peaking......really hard.

Crazy Horse Dammit

Apocalympdik -- I wrote this when before I could legally drink.  Actually, I had an ID I found on the railroad tracks -- I've been going to 21 and up shows since 18, anyway.  Turning 21 meant nothing to me.

This is that one song, Hallelujah that Leonard Cohen wrote, which is great.  Then Jeff Buckley came and did some great stuff, we love Jeff Buckley too.  We decided to add this to our repertoire -- as a response to this lady whose favorite song it was, she made me play it for her and she had this crush on me, and because she did -- she started ordering me around, making me be her "song boy' -- I ain't "song boy", so I took her favorite song and turned it into THIS version -- with lyrics like "that David played, and it pleased the HORDE" -- because, seriously -- "The Lord" pffft....whatever....with all due respect to Leonard Cohen.  Anyway, that lady was being weird because she was dying actually, and just wanted a really sexy boy to play her favorite song for her while her husband experienced this as some revenge for openly crushing on my wife a long time ago.  

So -- we ended up with a version of Hallelujah which grew from "HA!!!! This is your favorite song!!! Our heavy version taketh over!!"  ...and that, boys and girls is the origin story that you don't care about.

Really, it is about pleasing the horde -- if you listen to Christian radio, "The Lord" seems to be a really fussy old woman who doesn't like anything unless it is a wussy "it's all for you!"  If I was The Lord, I would consider that "this is inspired by me, and it sucks.....you are all going to Hell.  Just kidding, you're already there"  

Hallelujah.  
Rock N Roll is supposed to make people get a fire in their undies and want to shoot rock salt at us.  Rock N Roll Salt of the Earth, (people of the land...you know....Morons! - Blazing Saddles)

WWJD -- I answer that question, very accurately, and what is people's problem? 

"GET TORTURED AND KILLED!!!! ALLRIGHT!!!" My enthusiasm for Christ is not as infectious as hoped.  Oh well.

Hallelujah

It might remind you of Saint James Infirmary Blues....but, eh.....we veered off in  our own direction.

A song without guitar, keys and bass -- a lovely song for lovely people.  What is it about? I cannot divulge

MescaleRoses

We covered If I Can Dream....but, we do not seek to profit from those who are somewhere other than where they can get money -- and, isn't it lovely that other people who had nothing to do with the song collect from The Estate -- so, we don't contribute to "robbing a dead man's grave" --- that is why we do things the way that we do.  We like Elvis.  If I Can Dream is about a dream coming true, where birds fly higher in skies more blue -- where people don't sell other people's souls for them.  There have always been financial and business motivated reasons for making sure the public believes anything other than your soul ends up somewhere as part of an ongoing saga, but in a world where people insist on beliefs that justify making money from those who are not in a position to, even though it is their song.  Etc.

Heyoka Rode

Tequila & Lyme Disease

Pierpont's New Ditty

This is an old song, but I can't tell you my age because a lady doesn't need to know that.  Written in high school, which was a long time ago.

DiaGnosis II (the second opinion)

Once upon a time, there was a Miami Incident.  Everyone, except the band on stage, took off their clothes and left them there at the venue.  This turned into the lies we all cherish and hold dear. 

Talkin' About Love

Rock N Roll Downhill Into Hell

This is an extension of "Da Great Pierpont Song Heist".  We realized that people don't give a crap about our 12 minute long tracks since we are not TOOL (yet)....so we made three smaller tracks out of one big one (including "Pierpont's New Ditty".)

New On Reals

Smenkhare is pleased with this one, and so are we.  In the Beginning was The Word, and The Word was ISIS

NO CREATURE

For those who dig stuff like Morricone. This version of the song is without words, and there will be one with words.  Both of them are good.  Good for a Western soundtrack.

Today Is A Good Day To Cry

Yeah, I turned Metallica's "Eye Of The Beholder" into a blues shuffle....now middle age folks can dance to it. I have noticed that middle age people who are old enough that their kids are in college, in jail or perhaps they play in Metallica-- really like to cut it up to a blues shuffle.

Master of Faders

Eye Of The Beholder

Tezcat Real is Brian Hoffmann, ChrysCha Cat and extra special guest,  Harry "Pete" Pierpont.  Tezcat is a mirror coincidence, and what is real is royal.....roll the "r", or be considered lame.  What is real is royal.....Tezcatlipoca. 

We are an Outlaw Country Band...as we consider ourselves our own nation.  We do not entertain, we simply do things.  

Music.. is it for war and love, or is it for annoying people who invest everything in telling us what to do? 

Who's the drummer?  That's what they want to know......and Harry Pierpont? His contributions are unknowable.

TEZCAT REAL

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