“NEUROSIS“ by Theo.

An album created, produced and engineered by Theo.
Album art shot & edited by Theo.
Mixed and mastered by Theo & ZYROM.

« "𝑁𝐸𝑈𝑅𝑂𝑆𝐼𝑆" 𝑖𝑠 𝑎 𝑚𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑎𝑙 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑑𝑖𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑖𝑠 𝑛𝑜𝑡 𝑐𝑎𝑢𝑠𝑒𝑑 𝑏𝑦 𝑎𝑛𝑦 𝑜𝑟𝑔𝑎𝑛𝑖𝑐 𝑑𝑖𝑠𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑒, 𝑖𝑡 𝑐𝑎𝑛 𝑖𝑛𝑣𝑜𝑙𝑣𝑒 𝑠𝑦𝑚𝑝𝑡𝑜𝑚𝑠 𝑜𝑓 𝑠𝑡𝑟𝑒𝑠𝑠 (𝑑𝑒𝑝𝑟𝑒𝑠𝑠𝑖𝑜𝑛, 𝑎𝑛𝑥𝑖𝑒𝑡𝑦, 𝑜𝑏𝑠𝑒𝑠𝑠𝑖𝑣𝑒 𝑏𝑒ℎ𝑎𝑣𝑖𝑜𝑟, ℎ𝑦𝑝𝑜𝑐ℎ𝑜𝑛𝑑𝑟𝑖𝑎) 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑛𝑜𝑡 𝑎 𝑟𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑐𝑎𝑙 𝑙𝑜𝑠𝑠 𝑜𝑓 𝑡𝑜𝑢𝑐ℎ 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑙𝑖𝑡𝑦. 𝐼𝑡 𝑖𝑠 𝑎 𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑚 𝑚𝑎𝑖𝑛𝑙𝑦 𝑢𝑠𝑒𝑑 𝑡𝑜𝑑𝑎𝑦 𝑏𝑦 𝑓𝑜𝑙𝑙𝑜𝑤𝑒𝑟𝑠 𝑜𝑓 𝐹𝑟𝑒𝑢𝑑𝑖𝑎𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡𝑜 𝑑𝑒𝑠𝑐𝑟𝑖𝑏𝑒 𝑚𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑎𝑙 𝑑𝑖𝑠𝑜𝑟𝑑𝑒𝑟𝑠 𝑐𝑎𝑢𝑠𝑒𝑑 𝑏𝑦 𝑝𝑎𝑠𝑡 𝑎𝑛𝑥𝑖𝑒𝑡𝑦, 𝑜𝑓𝑡𝑒𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 ℎ𝑎𝑠 𝑏𝑒𝑒𝑛 𝑟𝑒𝑝𝑟𝑒𝑠𝑠𝑒𝑑. 𝐼𝑡 𝑖𝑠 𝑑𝑖𝑠𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑢𝑖𝑠ℎ𝑒𝑑 𝑓𝑟𝑜𝑚 𝑝𝑠𝑦𝑐ℎ𝑜𝑠𝑖𝑠, 𝑤ℎ𝑖𝑐ℎ 𝑟𝑒𝑓𝑒𝑟𝑠 𝑡𝑜 𝑎 𝑙𝑜𝑠𝑠 𝑜𝑓 𝑡𝑜𝑢𝑐ℎ 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑙𝑖𝑡𝑦. 𝐼𝑡𝑠 𝑑𝑒𝑠𝑐𝑒𝑛𝑑𝑎𝑛𝑡 𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑚, 𝑛𝑒𝑢𝑟𝑜𝑡𝑖𝑐𝑖𝑠𝑚, 𝑟𝑒𝑓𝑒𝑟𝑠 𝑡𝑜 𝑎 𝑝𝑒𝑟𝑠𝑜𝑛𝑎𝑙𝑖𝑡𝑦 𝑡𝑟𝑎𝑖𝑡 𝑜𝑓 𝑏𝑒𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑝𝑟𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑡𝑜 𝑎𝑛𝑥𝑖𝑜𝑢𝑠𝑛𝑒𝑠𝑠 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑚𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑎𝑙 𝑐𝑜𝑙𝑙𝑎𝑝𝑠𝑒.»

This opus explores the deepest and unexplored corners of my heart, the recesses I’ve let consume me for years. This project taps into my loneliness, my hatred, my impulsivity and my desire to become a better person every day. It was necessary to extract all this sludge from my bowels, because it was obstructing my will to live.
 
I have materialized this from dust, and surely I hope it will help out someone who needs to hear and understand that they’re not alone. We never know how long can a depressive episode last, and how destructive some life events can be. Push through, and never look back.

Special thanks to :
- both @dhaelo & @c3of for their undying support and love, throughout this difficult period when I was touching rock bottom
- @user-916999059
- all my people from @mfnf
- my listeners / supporters

/:love, peace, and freedom.
-theo

OUT NOW EVERYWHERE

NEUROSIS

OFFICIAL MUSIC VIDEO OUT NOW : https://youtu.be/DahzdJqZtuo

"KINETOSIS"

produced by @the0000
mixed and master by @the0000
vocals mixed and master by @zyrom
art by @the0000

LYRICS:

As the time passes
I hope you feel free

And if you kept me in your thoughts 
Forget about me

I've acted so cold to your feelings 
Wondered about what the deal is
On your whole skin u were peeling 
And till this day I'm still healing

Uh
I think I fell back
Died from the impact
Everything cracked
The world I live in now is abstract 
Cause I lost track

I let myself jump in the sea of doubts
I let myself drown in my own thoughts
I let myself sink in too deep in the abyss
Can someone tell me if I really exist?
The more I think about us
The deeper I sink in my guilt
The blood on my hands will never be clean
I really should have dismissed all of your feelings x2

OUT EVERYWHERE

KINETOSIS [music video in desc.]

“BURY MY WINGS“

Produced by Theo.
LYRICS:

It's been so long 
Now I see clarity in kerosene

I wish sometimes I could’ve OD on amphetamines

You were my first love, my daily shot of dopamine
The most caring and loving person I’ve ever seen

After all this time
I'm still not worthy of you

You're like a fucking curse
That just sticks to my body like glue

I ruined my health for you, so get out of my fucking head 
I know its not your fault its mine, I still regret what I've said

(Stacking bottles stacking bottles)

As I hope your doing well
I hope u found your purpose
I hope your brother grew well

(Pilling stubs in the ashtray)

I hope you found love again
Don't worry about how I'm doing
I'm slowly burning in hell

Teared my skin
Buried my fears
Been different since
Bearing no wings x4

(Stacking bottles stacking bottles)

As I hope your doing well
I hope u found your purpose
I hope your brother grew well

(Pilling stubs in the ashtray)

I hope you found love again
Don't worry about how I'm doing
I'm slowly burning in hell

BURY MY WINGS

“OUR SEWN SMILE“

with @merely 's beautiful acapella <3 : https://soundcloud.com/merely/the-killing-sun-acapella?si=0f7207afb4504a11863fcee373e7c0f8&utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharing

Produced by Theo.
LYRICS:

Silence surrounds me 
Sitting in pitch black
I tried to scream
But I am not getting no feedback

Into the void I hang on a swing
Apologizing for everything

Chaos inside of me
My heart’s about to crack
Stuck in a dream
I know there is no coming back

Cannot remember a single thing
I can’t feel my face, but it’s burning 

Peace of mind
Reset mankind
Nothing behind
It was outlined

Do you remember about us?
It's been a while

Can you see it on our faces? 
Our sewn smile?

I can’t feel my heartbeat anymore I know it's hopeless
All these drugs and pills just make it sound like it was worthless
I wish I could have hugged you more, instead of acting heartless
Now everything I know will disappear into nothingness

I’ve always wanted for more
My heart is feeling so sore
I can’t stop closing the door
Let's close our eyes and then fall x2

Peace of mind
Reset mankind
Nothing behind
It was outlined x2

Do you remember about us being happy together?
I cannot shake this feeling of regret, my body shiver

Do you remember about this feeling, it's been a while?
Can you see it on my face?
My sewn smile?

OUR SEWN SMILE

“HEARTSICK (ONE MORE MINUTE)“

Produced by Theo.
LYRICS:

As you stare at my eyes
Tell me what you feel
She only fed me with lies
Was all this even real?

One more minute
One more minute
I will go insane in a minute

One more minute
One more minute
I will go insane in a minute

One more minute
One more minute
I will go insane in a minute

One more minute
One more minute
I will go insane in a minute

Stuck in the same headspace since the past three years 
And to this day, you know that I'm still counting
Time froze for me, it's like I was in a painting
I am not moving
Not even evolving

I wake up I repeat the same day 
I sit on the same chair
Listen to the same songs in a loop

I wake up, and I'm feeling the same way
Always trynna repair
Mourning about the same shit in a loop

As you stare at my eyes
Tell me what you feel
She only fed me with lies
Was all this even real?

As you stare at my eyes
Tell me what you feel
Does it sound my demise?
My heart will never heal

One more minute
One more minute
I will go insane in a minute

One more minute
One more minute
I will go insane in a minute

One more minute
One more minute
I will go insane in a minute

One more minute
One more minute
I will go insane in a minute

HEARTSICK [ONE MORE MINUTE]

“WILT“

Produced by Theo.
LYRICS:

All my life I’ve been wondering if I was a bummer
I've been stacking so much pain and hatred, it makes me shudder
Always giving all I have to please, but at the end they never stay
They take all my love and burn it away, they burn it away

Ripping every bit of my own skin 
To burn it with kerosene
Just to repent for all my sins

Shattered my soul to protect everything I've built 
Everything I've tried to grow is starting to wilt

I lost the count of all times
I've ever dissociated
Pulling apart my skin from yesterday
To tough up the next one

WILT

“ETERNAL DREAD“

Produced by Theo.
LYRICS:

Go, go
While the waves overflow
Go, go
While the waves overflow
Go, go
While the waves overflow

I've been empty since
I landed on the abyss

Locked 
Helpless
I've been stuck
By the eclipse

Suffering is a bliss
Wishing the fog would dismiss
She’s not here, she doesn’t exist
I've been in love with the mist

It's been so long since I’ve been able to stand by myself
Insecurities have been rising out of me since I was twelve
They only thought to burn my hand when I was crying for help
I know the pain took away your strength 
Took away your health
Took away your breath

ETERNAL DREAD

“MURMUR“

Produced by Theo.
LYRICS:

I've been on the edge of life
Stuck at rock bottom
Nothingness into my eyes
Watching the chaos blossom

Trynna find a spark to trigger
Rotting smell, and it just lingers
Threw away all of my liquor
So I don't make myself sicker

Body heavier to drag
I start to reach my limit
Slowly becoming amnesiac

Pale face looking vivid
Decomposing is a habit
Stressing, looking like a maniac

Sinking underwater again
Going under pressure again
Nothing will never be the same
Running on fire
You're the one I blame x2

I once wished that I could write more, and happier songs
They just hide it, but I know that I can still see their thorns 

And the poison has been sinking deeper into my flesh
I have deprived myself from happiness until excess

Deep inside my heart I can sense a feeling of distress
Accumulating these inner feels I cannot express

She's been eating at my heart and flesh because of the stress
The more I possess all I need the more she request

Let the ship drown
I deserve to go down
Cover the sound
Until my body lies on the ground x2

MURMUR

“SUNKEN“

Produced by Theo.
LYRICS:

Kneeling
Beheaded
Blood evaporates into the air

Crawling
Dreaded
I pull the skin and I tear x2

My lungs are tainted with black oil
my body is bathed in petrol
Disappearing into my slump
I am breaking in a lump
My brain gets crushed 

And I'm Stacking all the gun shells
Drenched with my blood cells
Engulfed as my body disappears

My blood transformed into an ocean
My mask is not showing no emotion

Escaping as fast as I can, I tripped
Present is past, my legs get ripped 
Stuck in the sludge, the dark gets flicked 
I'm dragged through the earth, my body split

My limbs detach themselves away
Got no emotions to convey
Sliding down into the rift
They observed me when I drowned

Sliding down into the rift
They observed me when I drowned x2

Kneeling
Beheaded
Blood evaporates into the air

Crawling
Dreaded
I pull the skin and I tear x4

SUNKEN

“ACRID“

Produced by Theo.
LYRICS:

The oxygen that we both breath is not the same
Mine is rancid, full of dust and sulfur
I can see the future
Where you don’t remember my name

My vision just turned black
There is so much that I lack
Nothing else to fill the cracks
Even in my paragraphs 
Just to fill in all the gaps
I just stay behind the glass
At the end i'll be the last

Acrid is the air that I breathe
Right now, life don’t got no appeal
It falls apart like nothing is real
My heart is hardened like its steel x2

ACRID

“VANISHING ELYSIUM“

Produced by Theo & ZYROM.

VANISHING ELYSIUM [co-prod. zyrom]

ᴉ༙྇҉  ԍ༙྇҉ x༙྇҉ ᴉ༙྇҉ ƨ༙྇҉ ϝ༙྇҉  ϝ༙྇҉ o༙྇҉  w༙྇҉ ɑ༙྇҉ ĸ༙྇҉ ԍ༙྇҉  u༙྇҉ o༙྇҉ ᴉ༙྇҉ ƨ༙྇҉ ԍ༙྇҉  :༙྇҉ /༙྇҉ :༙྇҉  ᴉ༙྇҉  w༙྇҉ ɑ༙྇҉ ĸ༙྇҉ ԍ༙྇҉  u༙྇҉ o༙྇҉ ᴉ༙྇҉ ƨ༙྇҉ ԍ༙྇҉  ϝ༙྇҉ o༙྇҉  ԍ༙྇҉ x༙྇҉ ᴉ༙྇҉ ƨ༙྇҉ ϝ༙྇҉ 

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⢸⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⠀
⠘⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⡏⠀
⠀⢻⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣷⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣴⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⠁⠀
⠀⠈⣿⣿⣧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣤⣄⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣤⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⣷⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⣿⣿⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣷⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣦⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣾⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⠿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣤⣤⣤⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣠⣤⣤⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠙⠛⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠛⠛⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⡀⠀⢠⣤⣤⡤⣀⣀⣄⣀⣀⣄⣀⣀⡀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

@digitalfaceless
@mfnf