The First Day of Summer

Gröggsfær

Social media is a false god
Put your thumbprint on my playlist and tell me
I did a nice job 
And heaven, haven’t I always
Been one of those people it seems
That you can count on to make comments
But wouldn’t follow fifty feet?

I remember bein’ patient in the blunderbuss 
With just our hopes and dreams in front
And all our obligations in the rear-view mirror
Now I want what I want now I just lack the funds
It happens to the best of us
Does it make your priorities any clearer?

Afterwards we check our phones
The nouveau-proverbial pack of smokes
I’m lookin’ for distractions
From this dimension we inhabit
And if I find a few half-truths
In an article I can share with you
Well I’m hopin’ they’re worth believin’

Get out your nunchucks
And fight that feelin’…

Were you so busy dodgin’ bullets
That you missed the boat?
The heart just wants to stay afloat
And sinks in spite of all the tricks they taught you
And for the sake of that poor kid 
Who has a thing for you
I sure hope you tell the truth
Or have the decency to know when not to

Pour yourself somethin’ sour just to get a buzz
Sing those old songs just because
Watch the way your body still remembers
Because I saw you gettin’ married in my crystal ball
It didn’t bother me at all
I knew that one day
You’d find your forever

But tell me who’s got your melodies
All tangled up incessantly?
I’m laughin’ though I shouldn’t 
I could never hit those higher notes
But you sing through all the knots and kinks
and the nouveau-proverbial missing links
I don’t miss you
It really doesn’t seem that long ago

Get out your dual-wield katanas, baby…

While he’s jokin’ round how he learned the hard way
Just how to be nice
Do you hear her tellin’ stories about how
Plans fell through tonight?
It has to be done a certain way
A certain number of times, but

Darlin’ you’ll get there
And if its not perfect, then even better
You know, you can never tell where
The chips are gonna fall
So be sure to play your cards right
And if you can, then keep your head straight
You’ll find it never was that difficult at all 
You bought me Japanese weapons
Cause I said I felt defenseless
When your jokes have got me with
My back against the wall

Nunchucks

On and on, begin begone
Repent repeat refill refund
Reënergize, reanalyze 
Revamp rebuke reboot rebut
Remember when the year begins 
The vows are said, the sins are cleansed
So rip it up and start again
The drought, the drive, the dream, the dread

The nameless faces gather to show their support
When all the wolves come runnin’ back from the war
I don’t wanna feel weightless anymore
When the dust comes for your bones
Well it won’t forget your soul

Melody remember me
For I will not remember thee
The pangs of youth, to heal we sing
Though records fade, now obsolete
To grow to love, give in give up
My verdant green my stars above
Design destroy forgive forget
My pride and joy, my worst regret

Lefty, I can feel the knots forming in my back
And I can see the streaks of daylight
Filtering in through the cracks
And I can feel my dream slipping from my grasp
But the part that makes me sad
Is that it wasn’t all that, wasn’t all that bad

And now everything old has a bit of a new tint
My blackest blacks are a little blueish 
You can take my heart to the ceremony 
But don’t be givin’ it back in pieces 
I just wanna put my soul in something
Before they carry my bones away
But if I can’t stay ’til the end then, baby
I’m just gonna have to let you keep it

On and on, believe belong
Be one be all be here beyond
Be still my heart, be swift my song
Was new at once what now is lost
So bring along beloved ones
My Neverland my Goldy Pond
Its quiet here, like it was never there
So curse your Earth and pray your God

I don’t want my old self finding out
All the little details I left out
Burn it down
Build a better one where the old one was
And give your brother’s name to your newborn son
When the vows are said and done
Give the people what, the people what they want

(If I’m floatin’ away, don’t send me a line
You’d better be damn shore tonight)

Everything old has a bit of a new tint
My blackest blacks are a little blueish 
You can take my heart to the ceremony 
But don’t be givin’ it back in pieces 
I just wanna put my soul in something
Before they carry my bones away
But if I can’t stay ’til the end then, baby
I’m just gonna have to let you keep it

Black hole, swallow me alive
Cause the further I get the more time seems
To go faster than it ever did
Back home, stable by design
Cause I knew I’d grow to like this place
It’s just not how I imagined it

I wanna be brutal 
I wanna be honest
I wanna take responsibility for my actions
Cause I’m afraid I embellish the tales that I tell
With a little more romance than they had when they happened
Don’t wanna be different
Just wanna be finished
I don’t wanna go
I just wanna be there
But if we can’t get a ride
By the end of the night
Then it’s just another stop on the way
Another stop on the way…

I’m just a stop on the way
Another stop on the way

Stop

Wedding

I thought you wouldn’t answer
But I called anyway
Now we’re on two different lines
With nothing to say
Its barely scratched the surface
And we’re already there
I won’t ask you how you’re doin’
Cause I don’t really care

Seventeen and I’ve got plenty to do
Sit inside, kill some time
Dreamin’ of you
Now fate likes nothing better 
Than to mess with my head
I said ‘what do you believe in?’
You said nothin’ and left
I said ‘What do you believe in?’
You said ‘Nothin’ and left

Phone Tag Jamboree

Everything you ever wanted to do
Has been done before and perfected
It really kinda takes the pressure away
But I suppose it just depends on your perspective
I just wanna do the same old thing 
While standing on the backs of giants
I’m gonna keep on writin’ the same old song
All over and over again cause I like it

None of my friends are dead
But they’re gettin’ married like nobody’s business
I still got money to spend 
But I was tryin’ to save it for something important

Now I’m out too late and in too deep
I gotta red right hand and two left feet
They’ll give you money for nothin’ 
But when there’s nothin’ to eat
Your words are comin’ back to haunt you

Dead in the center of the safety zone
I just need a patch of land to call my own
And they left the meter runnin’ yeah
But no one’s home
My time is being used against me

I’m at a crossroads of my life, aren’t I?
Convenient perfect place to live
I don’t ever wanna be impartial ever again
So the baby won’t take me for…

One of my eyes won’t open, I lost depth perception
On the drive home hopin’ I don’t get a ticket
Cause I’m crossin’ double yellows and doubling the limit
Got a guardian angel and I’m testing his patience
In another four years this bridge will be finished
And maybe by then I’ll be ready to burn it
Brand new tires but the engine makes me nervous
And there’s two headlights but only one is workin’

I don’t feel nothin’ yet
But everyday I’m feeling less and less
I know I ain’t no person of interest
But I’m working my hardest on a lasting impression

Now I’m out too late and in too deep
I got a blue left brain and five false teeth
And they’ll be kickin’ you out
When all you wanna do is stay, stay…
I’ll spend the summer practicing
So when I sing to you, sing back to me
But we’ll perform the piece in it’s entirety 
I’ll try to last one more day

I’m at a crossroads of my life, aren’t I?
Convenient perfect place to…
I’m gonna get my money’s worth 
If its the last thing I do
The rest of my friends got stuck in traffic
And as long as the meaning stays hard to interpret
I’ll be hopin’ the baby won’t take me
For one of you

A Moment Of Clarity

Don’t stay up too late 
You’ve got nothing to wait for
Besides a lack of focus
When tomorrow arrives
Think of all of those little points of light
Don’t you know what that’ll do to your eyes
Over time?
Oh enlighten me if you’d be so inclined…

Cause its like your field of vision’s in another dimension
I know you can hear me but your eyes still look dead
Think of all the beautiful things you said
Will you ever be ambitious again
As long as you live?
Oh what a colorful world this could’ve been

I’m at a crossroads of my life, aren’t I?
Convenient perfect place to start
I don’t wanna believe in people ever again
So the baby won’t take me for one of them

And I want to thank you
For being so understanding 
But where do all the nightmares go
If we don’t fall asleep?
All of the things I once believed 
Now don’t mean a single thing to me
As you can probably see
How easy it is for one to forget their dreams

I’m at a crossroads of my life, aren’t I?
Convenient perfect place to end
I don’t wanna be part of something ever again
So the baby won’t take me for one of them, oh no

So the baby won’t take me for one of them

Phantasmagoria

Sticks and stars fell out of the sky
Down to the cold hallowed Holy Ground
But this wasteland still looks like a town
What are my options? 
I wonder, as I wander around
I don’t wanna be older
Than I am right now
Alternate dimensions exist
But I’ll prove how easy it is
To hate a place like this
But I swear on my head
As it falls of my neck
I will come back to bury you 
When I get the chance

While I struggle to piece
A seventh word in a string
The sky is fallin’ around us
And by autumn sing
‘I wish you didn’t have to leave’
Oh, the precious things I imagine

It’s gonna be lonely when we’re the only ones left
As if it wasn’t lonely enough as it is

The crooked ceiling crumbles beneath me
As I flicker through realities
And land somewhere similar 
But not quite the same
And try as I might
I can’t walk in a straight line
And I’m not patient enough to wait
For my luck to turn around
Is it freezing in this house
Or did my soul just escape through my mouth?
And I’m wandering through it 
Though my body is useless
Now watch me act foolish
As I figure it out

No one was prepared for
The earthquake and firestorm
And I watched as cities
Were swallowed alive
Now the rockets have failed us
There’s nowhere left to run
But I made confessions
Just for the occasion…

So I’m sorry that it had to take
The godforsaken end of days
For me to be honest
With you or with anyone
But lately I’ve been scared to death
Not because of the apocalypse
But of the fact that I might not
Be able to find you when it ends

Somewhere Similar

Soul, this vehicle’s got soul
It’s gonna take me places
It’s gonna take you home
Though I am a patriot
I’m only a man
And now I’m King of The Underground

Saturn, reapin’ in the harvest
A martyr in the darkness
With a photographic memory 
It’s a dodge and burn kind of compromise
And now there’s a flame goin’ out
At the end of the street

Red and back from the dead
I came for vengeance
But got closure instead
I guess I’ll go for a drive
Benz I’ve got some time to kill
As long as I’m still alive

And of all of the things
We had to share
They won’t let us off on this stop together
But it won’t be home 
If you won’t be there
And your looming presence doesn’t count

But at the end of your daydream you’ll think
How long ago did the stop light turn green?
I guess it’s time to go now…

Traffic, another classic tragedy 
I wasn’t gonna let it get to me
But accidents keep happening 
There is a cold white smoke in the air
And now it’s getting in my lungs

Sadly, still waiting in the back seat
The key’s in the ignition
But I don’t have the capacity
To move from a pile on the floor 
To the side of the road
In the heart of the storm
Where memorials form

Blue with nothing to do
I still had some people
I had to apologize to
True, but after we move
They won’t be seeing you around

Silent as the grave and 
Gone are the days
Where we took the car 
And drove far away
You cut your hair and
Took your lip ring out
What a pathetic thing
To be heartbroken about

But I won’t spend the summer writing eulogies
I’m saving that endeavor for the holidays
I’m gonna give him your name
Cause I guess it’s human nature

Everything, of everything we could have shared
	You can’t go on thinking like that forever
It’s not like you know, it’s not like I care
	Now you’re throwin’ words around…
I just feel like I’m running on empty
As if there’s anybody left to ask me
Am I on my own now?

Last Night At Home

I can’t tell if it’s motion sickness
Or the aftereffects of the sedative
But I can’t get my eyelids
To stop closing and just stay open
For these last few moments
And I’m losing my hearing
But that doesn’t mean
I’ve given up on listening
I can hear the conflict in your crying
And the songs that you keep writing
And how they almost reach a climax
By the time it’s time to fall asleep

There’s a hole in my sheet that started out as
A minuscule slit in the fabric
But caught my toe in my sleep and eventually tore
A hole the size of the mattress
And there’s a spare set in the closet
The ones you took to college
But I stopped believing 
It woulda been that easy

Cause there’s people
Supplying the needles
That are moving the businesses along
Then there’s animals
Who thought they were valuable
But couldn’t have been more wrong

I’ll be in the badlands
Crafting an attack plan
Chasing after the last of the fat cats
We still have to take down
Cause I didn’t feel like (I don’t wanna feel the way I feel right now)
Discussing the way I feel right now

I’ll lick my wounds
And I’ll get yours too
Do you recognize the sunlight 
Reflecting off the moon?
Why is it that heroes sung with reverie
Suffer such unforgiving penalties?
If you promise not to miss me
Then I’ll try not to blame myself
We’re not the only ones losing patience 
When your sister ran away I paid my sentiments
But I’ll be in a long list of losses 
Due to complicated causes
Good thing all I ever wanted was to
Fall asleep next to you

And maybe I don’t believe in wake up calls
But it was just the thing I needed
And maybe I left my heart on the balcony
But it’s way too cold to retrieve it
And maybe I woke up late on a Sunday (Maybe I’m not that honest)
Talkin’ ‘bout all the things I wanna do (Maybe I was fine until right now)
This weekend (Before you take him)

Because there’s people
Supplying the needles
That are moving the businesses along
Then there’s animals (Animals in love)
Who didn’t think they were valuable at all (Wondering how I spent)
But couldn’t have been more wrong (So much)

I’ll be in the far lands (So run)
Lookin’ for apartments (Away)
Singin’ songs about the last of the fat cats (From us)
We still have to take down (From us)
Cause I didn’t feel like (I don’t wanna feel the way I…)
Discussing the way I Feel right now 
Then suddenly it all just came out

Puke

It’s a masterpiece of science fiction
With a new forward for the extended edition
A deconstruction of the intersection of the 
Hyper-functions of life and death
It’s not that hard to be a face in the crowd
It’s not that scary ’til you say it out loud 
And it was three times removed
When I heard the news of
What happened to you
How unfortunate…

Where are you working now?
And how is that working out?
Tell me are you healthy yet?

Is there a place we can go to pick up our conversations
And are they even worth continuing?
Is there a place beyond the sands
Beyond where bodies collapse
Or does it only exist in a memory?
I don’t wanna know

Startling traces in brand new faces
Of traits and behaviors
And of style and demeanor 
Though none so soft spoken
I can’t help but hope, is this a
Modern day version of reincarnation
‘Cause I am my own and I can do what I want to 
Like smoking in public even though the sign says not to
‘But when two events happen to an object in question
I’ve been told we must always pay strict attention’

But everywhere that I go 
Nobody seems to know
We were not close friends
So why is it important?
Loose ends
It takes me so long to get through a project
That when I do the whole planet is different
And you can take this ‘terrible purpose’
As your reason

Notice the breeze and how it speaks through the trees
Does it remind you of when things were different?
And is everything beginning to all fit together
Or am I only now starting to notice it?
I’m just a troubled extra piece of the puzzle
And I’m worrying about all that I haven’t done
Loose ends don’t get tied up in life
Until the thing that happens to everyone
And then there were none

I don’t know how you died
Answers I just cant seem to find
Can’t you always count on
The comments of strangers for perspective?
And if you didn’t wanna go that way
Then by God, I don’t have much to say
And in the sands of the hourglass 
I can hear laughter in the darkness

And if this is not the fate you wanted
As if life ever gave anyone the choice
You can pick your battles but
When it’s over, then it’s over
But I don’t know how you died
But I hope this message finds you in time
I only wish your response is
As loud as a whisper

No Diabetic Left Behind

ZOMBIES (2020) 
artwork: Zombie Playground
by Jason Chan



my cold corpse as it crawls across the earth
	maybe in the morning i’ll remember what i deserve
cancel all my plans drawing bodies on the grass
	contemplate faith but you cant really kill the dead
cut across the yard and the yard i must defend
	imaginary gashes haven’t healed all the way yet
the kind of bad dreams they will never understand
	i’ll never be as proud as the day i killed my friends

we’ll be the good guys we’ve lived here the longest
and you can be the zombies
we’ll chase you around the whole cul-de-sac
when i tag you on the back
that means you’re dead and i cut off your head
in the night we’ll fall down and die
but we’ll all be back again

keep your voice down now we gotta get outta here fast
	they’re never gonna catch me i’m better at running than that
a fire in my lungs that an ice cold grip unfurls
	there won’t be room for us both at the end of the world
bodies are quick with no soul to help decide
	if i’m old enough to deal with leaving a friend behind
i’ll come back for you, i promise into lifeless eyes
	i wanna go home but you left me here to die

we’ll be the good guys we’ve lived here the longest
and you can be the zombies
we’ll chase you around the whole cul-de-sac
when i tag you on the back
that means you’re dead and i cut off your head
in the night we’ll fall down and die
but we’ll all be back again

keep your laces tied
the last standing neighborhood tonight
whatever you need to survive
	if we’ll all be back again this time tomorrow 
	i’ll show you my friend
	i’ll never break a sweat again
	or never run out of breath again
i’m ready to go inside

ZOMBIES

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