The Mutant Ages

Welcome to the pilot episode of The Mutant Ages! Maddy and Ryan's first step on their journey of watching every animated X-men TV show episode, ever, is Pryde of the X-Men. This TV pilot made in 1989 never ended up getting picked up for a full series. Why not? Let us explain why. Oh, and don't forget: Spider-Man wants you to register to vote!

Spotlight X-Men: Shadowcat

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Episode 1 - Pryde of the X-Men (1989)

Ryan and Maddy's second episode of The Mutant Ages features their first foray into X-Men: The Animated Series, with a big spotlight on Jubilee. Did you know that Jubilee is one of Ryan's favorite X-Men? Anyway, this episode is already way longer than we planned for it to be, so bear with us. We had to analyze the opening credits of the show, okay? Enjoy!

Spotlight X-Men: Jubilee

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Episode 2 - "Night of the Sentinels Part 1,"  X-Men: The Animated Series

X-Men: The Animated Series gets real heavy in the second episode, because our heroes lose one of their own. Ahh, Morph, we hardly knew you! Ryan and Maddy do a spotlight on Morph's comic book history, and then, analyze whether or not Wolverine and Morph were dating. Because we ask the important questions on The Mutant Ages.

Spotlight X-Men: Morph

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Episode 3 - "Night of the Sentinels Part 2," X-Men: The Animated Series

At last, Magneto has arrived to introduce some moral complexity to the world of X-Men: The Animated Series! Maddy liked this episode, but Ryan thought it needed another draft. The show writers went wild with the literary references this time, so get ready for some Shakespeare quotes. This week's spotlight is on Magneto, who has a confusing and contradictory comic book history and is nonetheless one of Maddy and Ryan's favorite mutants! 

Spotlight X-Men: Magneto

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Episode 4 -  "Enter Magneto," X-Men: The Animated Series

Professor X is a jerk. Ryan and Maddy keep telling you that, but in this episode, it's really astounding how much of a jerk he is! We've reached X-Men: The Animated Series' fourth episode, "Deadly Reunions," in which two pairs of boyfriends get reunited: Xavier and Magneto, plus Wolverine and Sabretooth. Except there's one little problem with shipping Sabretooth and Wolverine: it might be incest, depending on varying comic book canons. Oof. Anyway, we'll tell you all about it on this week's THE MUTANT AGES!

Spotlight X-Men: Sabretooth

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Episode 5 - "Deadly Reunions," X-Men: The Animated Series

Finally, Storm gets to be in charge of the X-Men's new mission in "Captive Hearts." But first, she'll have to endure Professor X being a huge jerk to her about her PTSD, to Maddy and Ryan's chagrin. Is Professor X ever going to stop treating the X-Men like crap? Seriously, it's like he can't even hear us shouting at him through the screen! Anyway, this episode is all about the Morlocks, an "unsightly" band of mutants living in the New York City subway tunnels. They're led by the nefarious and predatory Callisto, who kidnaps Cyclops and tries to make him her sex slave. This is a kids' show, somehow.

Spotlight X-Men: Callisto

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Episode 6 - "Captive Hearts," X-Men: The Animated Series

They can't all be winners. "Cold Vengeance" is the first X-Men: The Animated Series episode that Ryan and Maddy would recommend you skip watching. Unless you're hankering to see Wolverine play the white savior role while Sabretooth monologues at a glacier. But, hey, why not save yourself the trouble and let us recap the episode for you instead?

Spotlight X-Men: Wolverine

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Episode 7 - "Cold Vengeance," X-Men: The Animated Series

Maddy and Ryan discuss "Slave Island," in which our X-Men: The Animated Series heroine Jubilee puts up with the worst vacation ever, thanks to Gambit. Storm also gets plenty of moments to shine in this episode, and she even gets a cute scene with her girlfriend Rogue. (According to the writers of the show, they're not canonically dating, but they're TOTALLY dating.) This episode also introduces us to Cable, everyone's favorite bisexual time traveler. Maddy gets on a soapbox about the fact that Marvel won't just let Cable and Deadpool date, so strap in for that.

Spotlight X-Men: Cable

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Episode 8 - "Slave Island,"  X-Men: The Animated Series

This week on Maddy and Ryan's X-Men: The Animated Series rewatch, we meet Colossus, from Russia! You know he's from Russia because he just can't stop telling us that. We also meet the Juggernaut, who is the actual focus of this episode, not that we want him to be. Wolverine and Jubilee become besties with a killer sense of teamwork, but aside from that, this episode is a real snooze. Let us recap it for you (with jokes) so that you don't have to watch it yourself, hm?

Spotlight X-Men: Colossus

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Episode 9 - "The Unstoppable Juggernaut," X-Men: The Animated Series

Maddy and Ryan delve into "The Cure," a metaphor-heavy episode of X-Men: The Animated Series that makes it crystal clear how mutant powers serve as a metaphor for being gay. In this episode, we meet Warren Worthington III, a closeted mutant who's super-rich and funding a "cure" for his mutation. The inventors of the alleged "cure" are Mystique and Apocalypse, though, and you just can't trust those two with anything! Meanwhile, Rogue wants the cure for herself, even though Gambit would be happy to risk a kiss with her. Ryan brings out all his best Rogue impressions in the process.

X-Men Spotlight: Mystique

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And don't forget... WARREN'S GONE.

Episode 10 - "The Cure,"  X-Men: The Animated Series

The "Come the Apocalypse" episode of X-Men: The Animated Series can't possibly be canon. For starters, none of the X-Men remember Archangel, which contradicts future episodes. Meanwhile, Rogue and Mystique don't recognize one another, either. In spite of this episode's plot holes and multiple confusing fight scenes, Ryan and Maddy enjoyed it a lot... because they were laughing at it, not with it. If you want to see an episode of X-Men: TAS that deals with serious political themes, circle back to the episode previous to this one. "Come the Apocalypse" is just plain goofy.

X-Men Spotlight: Apocalypse

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Episode 11 - "Come the Apocalypse,"  X-Men: The Animated Series

This week, Maddy and Ryan watch Part 1 of X-Men: The Animated Series' adaptation of Days of Future Past, and we get amped up about Wolverine's butt. Even more than usual. You know who else is amped about Wolverine's butt? Bishop! According to us.

The X-Men: TAS adaptation of Days of Future Past moves fast and takes some shortcuts through comic book canon. In this episode, Bishop acts like a total jerk and makes a bunch of impulsive mistakes, but is that really so different from his comic book incarnation? Ryan says no. Maddy ends up agreeing, but at the end of the episode, she still makes the case that Bishop has potential as a character and deserves more. More of Wolverine's butt! But also better-written stories, and maybe even one of those Netflix shows or something.

X-Men Spotlight: Bishop

Next week: The assassination... of the 90s!!!!

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Episode 12 - "Days of Future Past Part 1," X-Men: The Animated Series

Ryan and Maddy check out the second half of X-Men: The Animated Series' adaptation of Days of Future Past, and it's a lot stronger than Part 1. This episode smooths over the rough edges of Bishop and Wolverine's future together, plus it solidifies the threesome between Bishop, Wolverine and Gambit. And by "solidifies," we mean, "it's not canon, but come on. Just watch that poker scene!"

Anyway, this episode manages to juggle its many plot-lines and characters with ease. The only part we don't like is the Blob. We talked about his portrayal in Pryde of the X-Men, and we don't like it here either. 

X-Men Spotlight: Senator Kelly

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Episode 13 - "Days of Future Past Part 2,"  X-Men: The Animated Series

Maddy and Ryan have just wrapped up watching the first season of X-Men: The Animated Series, and they'd like to remind you that Magneto was right... among other things. Magneto has captured Senator Kelly and the X-Men try to intervene, but before they can do that, the Sentinels rush in to capture Senator Kelly themselves. Now that humans and mutants have a common enemy in these big plastic robots, they're able to put aside their bigotry.
Is that realistic, even as a metaphor? Maddy and Ryan have some doubts, but nonetheless, they delve into this analogy and many others that have unfolded over the course of the season. They also review their favorite and least favorite characters so far, the episodes that should be skipped, and read some excellent mail from listeners about trans narratives in the X-Men and more!

X-Men Spotlight: Master Mold

Next week: THE FIRST X-MEN MOVIE! Watch along with us, won't you?

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Episode 14 - "The Final Decision," X-Men: The Animated Series

The Mutant Ages delve into a live-action adaptation for the first time, and they also have their very first guest: Mary Ellen from Let's Watch 2 Movies, the other podcast that Maddy co-hosts at Atomic Blue Productions! Welcome, LW2M fans, to a show that discusses queer subtext in the X-Men and also tries to turn that subtext into text at every turn.

We hope you all enjoy this visitation of Maddy and Ryan's teenage years, including a rundown of all the WAV files Maddy had of voice lines from this movie, the mall food court where Ryan first saw the X-Men movie trailer, and Mary Ellen feigning interest in Marvel minutiae. If you enjoy this episode, consider listening to Let's Watch 2 Movies (soundcloud.com/letswatchtwomovies).

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Episode 15 - X-Men (2000)

Maddy and Ryan return to X-Men: The Animated Series for the premiere of the second season, a strong episode that walks the line between serious political commentary and goofy fun times. Guess what? Morph's back, and he's ready to play all sorts of mind games on the X-Men. Meanwhile, the Friends Of Humanity are also playing mind games on the X-Men, except that's way less fun to watch.

X-MEN SPOTLIGHT: Mr. Sinister, the glam god of plot holes and sexy torture! At last, Marvel's goofiest antagonist has arrived on the scene.

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Episode 16 - "Til Death Do Us Part, Part 1," X-Men: The Animated Series

Welcome to the Mr. Sinister Show! Mwahahhaa!! Maddy and Ryan have a villain-packed episode for you this week. The second episode of season 2 of X-Men: The Animated Series is all about our favorite campy villain and his henchman, who call themselves The Nasty Boys. This episode has some serious moments, but it's mostly goofy and delightful — and the queer subtext is barely subtext at this point. It's just text.

X-MEN SPOTLIGHT: The Nasty Boys!

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Episode 17 - "Til Death Do Us Part, Part 2,"  X-Men: The Animated Series

Sometimes, X-Men: The Animated Series is packed with prescient political allegories. And sometimes... it's not.

The third episode of the show's second season isn't political and it's not even accurate to the comic books. In spite of that, we enjoyed the heck out of it. This week, Maddy and Ryan cover Storm's manufactured backstory in X-Men: TAS, as well as her canonical backstory from the comic books, and the various retcons involved. Since there's almost no politics to discuss this week, we spend that time talking about our favorite black female heroines of the '70s and '80s Marvel era (Misty Knight and Monica Rambeau) and, later, detail our frustrations with the current state of the live-action adaptations of the X-Men and the MCU. Sooo, strap in for that rant!

Also, we have a special announcement: We will be at Arisia 2018, speaking on panels about the X-Men, the Marvel Cinematic Universe, videogames and horror make-up!

X-Men Spotlight: Storm!!!

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Episode 18 - "Whatever It Takes," X-Men: The Animated Series

This week, Maddy and Ryan wish they had paid more attention in history class, because they're pretty sure that X-Men: The Animated Series' take on the dissolution of the Soviet Union didn't involve a tentacled super-mutant laying waste to Eastern Europe. That's what happens in "Red Dawn," but don't worry--the X-Men are on the scene, ready to intervene in an international incident! Meanwhile, Jubilee sets the standard for Nazi-punching bravery in this episode. Hell yeah.

IMPORTANT: Sign this petition for Ryan Pagella to be MR. SINISTER!!!! https://www.change.org/p/the-walt-disney-company-reboot-x-men-make-ryan-pagella-mr-sinister !!!!!!!!

X-Men Spotlight: Illyana Nikolievna Rasputina, Colossus' sister, a.k.a. Magik, a.k.a. Darkchylde, a.k.a. Lightchylde, a.k.a. X-Men Had A Goth Phase

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Episode 19 - "Red Dawn," X-Men: The Animated Series

This week's episode of X-Men: The Animated Series is all about Wolverine, so we can't help but like it, even though it's not THAT good. But Ryan did own a copy of it on VHS as a young boy, so that's important to note. (Maddy didn't, which is very sad.) Anyway, this episode is called "Repo Man," and it's all about Logan's exes trying to repossess him. In other words, it's about Alpha Flight, which is the Canadian superhero team that got created to give Logan a backstory.

X-Men Spotlight: Heather Hudson! But also, a summary of Alpha Flight's powers and history.

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Episode 20 - "Repo Man," X-Men: The Animated Series

Maddy Myers and Ryan Pagella review and break down the queer subtext of every X-Men cartoon/tv show/movie/game/book EVER. And maybe date Wolverine.

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