I am officially completely obsessed with ON Voicefeed's text-to-speech voice "Elizabeth". She is GLaDOS, Shodan, and SIRI all rolled into one droll, British, vocal sex bomb. I was up till 2 am playing around with creating custom greetings in their Iphone app and I perfected the best one for my tribemate, Laurence. I really found their text-to-speech to be really impressive and I was happy with the results.

Here is the text version of the custom greeting:
(I added some phonetics to assist the pronunciation obviously)

"Hey Lawrence. Or should I cal you daddy. Are you naked? Are you brown all over? Eli is busy. You should know that. Leave a message and send a text for good measure. You know what? I like darkies. So vigorous! Want to mate with me? No? Fine then. Damn kneegrows. Goodbye"

ON Voicefeed's "Elizabeth" (For Laurence)

ON Voicefeed's text-to-speech voice Elizabeth continues to be my new obsession.  Since discovering the joy of creating custom voicemail greetings for my friends and family, I have been really working hard to maximize what I like to call "amusing vocal abuse" with her.

Since Shodan first mocked, mauled, and manipulated me in System Shock 2, I will admit to having a love for these A.I. Dommes that have since been further popularized by GLaDOS and even Siri.

This voicemail greeting I created for my father, Edward Barlow, who rarely calls me but who I remember listened to a lot of WKND (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/WKND) when I was growing up in the 70s and 80s. I always associate certain songs with my him when I hear them especially any Earth Wind and Fire or Parliament Funkadelic. So this is for you dad :)

Here is the actual text I put in for Elizabeth to say:
(I added some phonetical stuff to assist the pronunciation)

"Hello Edward. It says in my files that you prefer to be called "sweet daddy". Yeah. Keep dreaming. Your incredible daughter is busy at the moment. But I will deliver your message when she is free. It also says in my files that you like "funk" and R and B. Shall I sing a little Parliament Funk a dell ick for ya?  Now I lay me down to sleep! Ooh, I just can't find the beat! Flashlight. Neonlight. Ooh, stop light! Dance suckahh!"

My dad isnt too tech savvy and hasn't called me yet to hear this. I'll be sure to upload his response when I get it :)

ON Voicefeed's "Elizabeth" (For My Dad)

ON Voicefeed's text-to-speech voice Elizabeth continues to be my new obsession. Since discovering the joy of creating custom voicemail greetings for my friends and family, I have been really working hard to maximize what I like to call "amusing vocal abuse" with her.

Here is the actual text I put in for Elizabeth to say: 
(I added some phonetical stuff to assist the pronunciation)

"Hello. Wait. Why is your number BLOCKED? .. Oh I know why. It's because you know that if I knew your identity. I would hunt you down. Drive all up in your hood and cap your ass right in front of your damn Grannmah! Yeeeyah!! That's right .. This here is a Glock 40. And it can go bang! .. Ahll Up. in your damn Face! Beeeaahtch!!"

Getting that "bitch" to sound right took some work :)

thewebrecluse