prod. by me.
i originally rlllllly wanted this to be the outro but honestly, it didn't need to be. like bleeder already worked so well and i did not wanna overstuff this record. BUT i still love it and it captures EXACTLY what i wanted the record to sound like.

THE MANIA OF STOKER (instrumental demo)

"i spend my hours doing alchemy..."
a song about wanting to be remembered / to live

mv: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1U6qefKcOrg
bandcamp: https://jamiepaige.bandcamp.com/album/cadmium-colors
spotify/apple music/etc: https://fanlink.tv/cadmium

art by Que
https://twitter.com/REVERIEQUE
mv by friendxp
https://twitter.com/friend_xp 
saxophone solo by Soneji of Project Mikan
https://twitter.com/JustSoneji
mastering by Marcy Nabors
https://twitter.com/Shadolith

---

lyrics:

i spend my hours doing alchemy
i mix my yellows and my blues to make a shade of green
prosaic practice of depravity
suspending innocents above their disbelief
i wish that i could paint a pretty picture onto everything
and leave a mark upon the world that felt like anything
but maybe that's the essence of an artist and their legacy
just chasing down a sense of infamy

put brush to canvas with a pirouette
a simple motion makes the consequence intricate
all the little nothings and my parapet
i hope it's something that you don't forget

cadmium red is the ground beneath
cadmium orange, everything i see
cadmium yellow is the air i breathe
cadmium colors painted inside me
i can make autumn from a single leaf
steal a fine picture like a first class thief
make the water work like you won't believe
find a new world that can set you free
how could anybody ever live like me?

i spend my hours doing alchemy
i make a life refining zinc inside the smeltery
it's not exactly where i want to be
but wanting doesn't matter when there's mouths to feed
i wish that i could paint a pretty picture of a fantasy
and turn a feeling to a living for my family
instead i make the metals in the pigments in my reverie
and maybe that can be enough for me

oh, isn't it funny facing destiny?
it's like a knife inside twisting my arteries
god, i want for nothing but identity
i think that something might be wrong with me

cadmium red is the ground beneath
cadmium orange, everything i see
cadmium yellow is the air i breathe
cadmium colors painted inside me
antegrade fever, 101 degrees
shatter my body with a gentle breeze
dammit, i am real and i have my dreams
watch me burn brighter 'til i fail to breathe
how could anybody ever live like me?

(baby, do you know what it's like to die?)
(to see the sparkle fade from inside your eye?)
i can't remember what it's like to feel autonomy
can't even feel it in the moments that you left to me
(i don't wanna leave with a work undone)
(the paint can barely dry 'fore it fills my lungs)
i keep a bullet in the chamber, mocking me
but i don't wanna feel it coming out of me
i don't want-

i spend my hours doing alchemy
i mix my yellows and my blues to make a shade of green
chasing impossible philosophy
and hoping that this poison ain't the death of me

cadmium red is the ground beneath
cadmium orange, everything i see
cadmium yellow is the air i breathe
cadmium colors painted inside me
i can make autumn from a single leaf
steal a fine picture like a first class thief
make the water work like you won't believe
find a new world that can set you free
how could anybody ever live like-

(baby, do you know what you wanna hear?)
('cause you can say the word, make it oh so clear)
we're all just searching for a sense of solidarity
to hold each other close and confiscate our destiny
(no one wants to leave with a work undone)
(we only need a brush we can pass along)
i kept a bullet in the chamber for a rainy day
but what's the point in planning for it anyway?
i've got too many colors for a shade of grey
and i can make it autumn every single day!

Cadmium Colors

featuring visualeyes on keys
the vocal synth Kasane Teto SV,
and apologies to no one but myself

--

watch the blood get spilled
you can kill, or you can be killed
it doesn’t really matter what i feel
i would rather fake than make the pain real

oh, take that smirk, wipe it off your face
you would do the same shit if it let you change your fate
if life is nothing but an endless race
you bet your ass i'm getting first place

please somebody get me out of here
oh please somebody wont you get me out of here, oh!
you can get me out of here!

yep, that's right, let your dreams take flight
watch the line go up, line go up, up up up up up
until it breaks right through, blows a hole through you
you can fill it up, fill it up, f- f- fill it up
and all the meat will slide off the bone, so nice
you can eat it up, eat it up, eat eat eat eat eat
until you're full of life, its a goddamn vibe
baby, fuck it up, fuck it up, fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
oh we can fuck until the sun burns out
we can rot for clout

die upon your hill
i live apart from love and goodwill
and when the pain comes calling for my head
yeah i would rather hurt than be happy and dead

oh, fuck your frown, baby, spare your grace
now i’m wearing my crown, perfect framing of my face
all the detail surgically replaced
it’s a crying shame, a pathetic disgrace

please somebody get me out of here
please somebody wont you get me out of here, oh!
i’m not getting out of here!

hah, that's right, let your dreams take flight
watch the line go up, line go up, up up up up up
until it breaks right through, blows a hole through you
you can fill it up, fill it up, f- f- fill it up
and all the meat deep-fried with a garnish and side
you can eat it up, eat it up, eat eat eat eat eat
until you're full of life, on the edge of the knife
baby, cut it up, cut it up, fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck it
oh god, a waking nightmare
i live a life so hollow that i’m not even there
oh god, the light won’t save me
oh i’m a perfect tempered instrument and life is gonna play me
come and fuck me till the sun burns out
and I rot for-

maybe not a single real reason
my blood’s already out of season
so unwanted, even by myself
tell me, what the hell? what the hell?

i don’t like what’s at my core
pray to god to fix my soul
but i don't need god’s forgiveness
i need yours

hah, thats right, let your dreams take flight
watch the line go up, line go up, up up up up up
until it breaks right through, blows a hole through you
you can fill it up, fill it up, f- f- fill it up
and all the meat will grind into pretty pink slime
you can eat it up, eat it up, eat eat eat eat eat
until you're full of life, cut yourself up with the knife
baby, cut it up, cut it up, fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck it
oh god, a waking nightmare
i live a life so miserable, it isn’t fair
oh god, the light won’t save me
so let the anthropocene watch me GOING FUCKING CRAZY
come and fuck me till the sun burns out
and I rot for clout
[i'm crazaeiaieae]

ROT FOR CLOUT

I'm scared of being left here alone...

I'm even more scared of becoming used to it

Honestly

CREDIT - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SebM4MJO7LQ

Honestly (ft. Kasane Teto)

prod. by tommy.
miku tuning by @2cada
art by Kreifish

angel trigger (ft. Hatsune Miku)

Original song link: https://youtu.be/sqK-jh4TDXo?si=WXAzJYNg-uS2Iqvb

Jamie Paige / JamieP: https://youtube.com/@jamiepaigeirl?si=9maCm8KxfmxQHUZ8

JamieP - Machine love (Feat. kasane Teto)

"Bro is rotmaxxing," my friend Joey

Streaming:
Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/gabboxd/never-will
Bandcamp: https://gabboxd.bandcamp.com/track/never-will
Spotify: (SOON)
Apple Music: (SOON)

My FIRST publicly released Vocaloid song starring the one and only Kasane Teto!!!

Production ★ Composition ★ Tuning ★ Art ★ Editing - https://twitter.com/gabbofunny

Special thanks to YOU for watching and inspiring me to actually finish this :)

===== Places you can support me and my creative endeavors =====
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@gabboXD
Twitter: https://twitter.com/gabbofunny
Ko-fi: https://ko-fi.com/gabboxd
Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/gabboxd
Bandcamp: https://gabboxd.bandcamp.com/
Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/gabboxd.bsky.social

Lyrics:

You say you love me so much,
but are you sure?
See, I’ve got myself a little problem,
and I think that it might start with y-o-u

It won't stop spreading, my dear,
and there's no cure
It’s so hard to keep the windows open
when I refuse to rely on you

(Can't get out of, can't get you out of)
Can't get you out of my head
(Can't get out of, can't get you out of)
There's something I should've said
(Can't get out of, can't get you out of)
Rose-tinted feelings of dread
Imitation never feels right,
but I can't fall for you

Because I, don't want to hear that sound
You can't just wait around
I’m broken and you,
can't fix this feeling in my soul
I’m losing all control
The cracks starting to show
You can’t
You can't, you won't, you never will

(You can't, you won't, you never will)
(You can't, you won't, you never will)

It’s hard to keep the conversation up
I try my best, but I'm out of luck
It's tough. I don't know what to do
It's hard enough just talking to you

The distance probably doesn't help that much
I'm lying, waiting, craving for your touch
My heart is aching, craving for your love, but
I know it's not that easy

Falling for you like I did back when
my heart was working and we had something
I scream, I cry, and I bawl
but nothing works or helps me at all

My mind is crying, begging for the end,
My memories clouded in a sharp vignette
My heart is saying that I love you, but I
can never reach you

Because I’m so scared to bring you down
This darkness all around
You're just so perfect
A single scratch could change it all
the dominoes that fall
Can't say it's not your fault
I can't. I wish that I could tell you

We can make it (You can’t)
We can make it work (You can’t)
We can make it (You can’t)
We just have to try, baby (You can’t, you won’t, you never will)

We can make it (You can’t)
We can make it work (You can’t)
We can make it (You can’t)
I want you, baby (You can’t, you won’t, you never will)

Please don’t leave me (You can’t)
I’m so sorry (You can’t)
I just need you (You can’t)
We just have to try, baby (You can’t, you won’t, you never will)

I’m so sorry (You can’t)
Don’t just leave me (You can’t)
What’s the harm in trying, baby? (You can’t)
Just give me one more chance (You can’t, you won’t, you never will)

Because I don't want to hear that sound (Don’t wanna hear it)
You can't just wait around
I’m broken and you,
can't fix this feeling in my soul (Can’t fix this feeling)
I’m losing all control (I can’t take it anymore)
The cracks starting to show
You can’t
(You can’t just fix me)
You can't, you won't, you never-

Because I’m so scared to bring you down (So scared to ruin you)
This darkness all around (I couldn’t handle the pain, and I’m so sorry)
You're just so perfect
A single scratch could change it all
the dominoes that fall (It’s not your fault)
Can't say it's not your fault
I can't, I wish that I could tell you (I’ll never get to tell you)

(I wish that I could tell you)
(I wish that I could tell you)

NEVER WILL

Music/Lyrics/Vocal Melody/Arrange/Mix- KAT (https://x.com/VocaloKAT)
Music/Vocal Melody- Aku P (https://x.com/acupi_)
Tuning- ryu (https://x.com/ryutsuinthereal)
Master- Jamie Paige (https://x.com/pamiejaige)
MV- suzie (https://x.com/chinjireta)

Affection Addiction ft. POPY

what if angel trigger was red?

prod. by tommy.
tuning by 2cada
art by kreifish

THE MANIA OF STOKER (instrumental demo)

tommy.

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