Lyrics.
I think I finally grown a custom to the pain,
defeated either that or I’ve driven it’s driven me insane and I’ve gone beyond it,
post nostalgic chronic pain‘s from past relations and cycles from those points beyond it,
and thousands of voices I’ve internalized over time that I put me down crowding my head,
trust much more than an issue for me hardly had a best friend who ain't put a knife in my back yet somethings only truly ever here for seasons Not everything meant to be endlessly still I torture myself in my mind with thoughts of all my greatest fears and most painful memories like,

What if when you next fall, it’s life the last time no one answered your call,
maybe it was you out of place and the only mistake ever made was ever trusting others at all,

Things I only wish I could communicate,
I’ve been feeling but never know how to say,
hurts when people ask me,
I just tell them I’m fine,

I’ll be alright

but still inside,

hurts when people ask me,
I just tell them I’m fine,

I’ll be alright

but still inside,

Hoping I'll finally outgrown the pain felt less then for not standing up and excepting defeat
but maybe that be different if pops had taught me a lesson any other than teaching preaching to me about
how I should turn the other cheek but I could take the blame for that too
who I wish I was writing to this letter to you

found my strength from inside not above
cause no fist in the world were hurt like disappointing everyone you love

and I truly just need a connection but can’t seem to hold on to many for long Wish I knew how to show how I actually feel and actually care but people don’t know

i’ve been scarred from connections that resonate instantly only to lose everyone just as quickly it feels like a cycle on constant repeat of people being open then switching up and acting iffy it’s torture

this is my life I’m in control just a lie I tell myself To feel whole

I need you now just when you go
Feels like every move I make no knows,

this is my life, I'm in control,

just a lie I tell myself to feel whole
need to be free
go with the flow
get out of my head get in touch with my soul
need to let some things go

this is my life I’m in control just a lie I tell myself To feel whole
I need you now just when you go
Feels like every move I make no one knows
,
this is my life, I'm in control, just a lie I tell myself to feel whole
need you need to be free go wih the flow, get out my head get in touch with my soul but truly I don’t know

Things I’m wishin one day to communicate
I’ve been feeling but never know how to say, don’t know how to say, hurts tho when people ask me
I just tell them I’m fine,
I’ll be alright,

but still inside..
~][~TREES~][~