Do you ever feel like this monotonous drudge through life is nothing more than just the most basic aspects of human aspiration but just slightly tweaked to the current time, in the end we do nothing but recite the same lines, play the same parts, and stay neatly in our single file lines. Even for those that escape it they simply make another that trap others like themself within, its truly the cruel form of torture to be aware of these forces at play but unable to do anything but spread your misery to others.

N E V E R

Ever just lay awake at night not being able to sleep, but you can't bring yourself to do anything else so you just lay there in the dark, until eventually you pull out your phone and start swiping back and forth hoping for something interesting to magically appear Then you inevitably go back to just sitting in the dark and some how through all the odds finally fall asleep, but then you realize now that your comfortable in your deep sleep your inevitability going to have to wake up sooner rather than later In the end you wake up feeling like shit and think to yourself it might just have been better to stay up all night. How do the commonfolk stay upbeat, how do they continue to thrive in such filth, why am i the only one being held down and made to wallow in despair. Why can't I be set free? Why can't i succeed? Why am i to be left alone? i just wanna go.


11921'21.315.

We peer into the mirror at the earliest hour, darkness secluding a frightening visage, a beast with eyes stained red a face disheveled covered in muck, liquid oozing from every pore, it screams and rages from beyond the veil bashing at the walls of its enclosure, it writhes with hate, it bites into its own skeletal hands tearing into what little flesh it has, in the end it slumps to the floor seemingly unfulfilled it disappears into a speck as quickly as it appeared, none have noticed this display but us this dance of madness the beast recites periodically it seeks to be known to be seen and to end, but it only has us and we know not if it will ever get what it wants and we dread the day when does for we to are lost in this dance simply waiting for the song to end.


Chant  of  the  lonely

A man walks alone with nothing but a shovel to his name,he digs into the earth for days,weeks,and months he forms an enormous hole that stretches on forever, his shovel hits hard with a thunk and he finds that he can dig no further he sits at the bottom of the hole so far down no light can reach wrapped tightly in this miasmic blackness he contemplates "I cannot climb out of the hole nor can I go down any further,all I had was this shovel and even it has faltered, I am sure to die down here" he says speaking to himself and so he sat there for what felt like centuries, tossing and turning feeling the agony of his body eat away at him, shrouded in eternal darkness he would rage against the confined walls and scream into the ethereal loneliness, time passes but he cannot hope to tell how much at this point he has no energy left to even lift a finger, his body has become exceedingly gaunt and malnourished though if any were to look upon him they wouldn't be able to tell in this pitch black atmosphere, he stares into the cramped darkness only to see a vague figure wrapped in darkness it speaks with a voice like a thousand whispers " you sought an escape and potential gain but only find yourself imprisoned in pursuit of that, you rage and scream to blame everything but yourself knowing full well only you are responsible for where you are now, your past is far behind you your future doesn't exist and your present isn't a gift" the dark figure disappears as if it were never there in the first place, he lays slumped over gasping with ragged breath feeling his eyelids go heavy and Begin to descend ever so slowly, though he is scared for what is to come he still welcomes it the freedom from that which he could not escape himself.


1'2151415.

at one point in my life I attempted to take my own life by hanging in my final moments within that last breath this is what I heard vaguely 

urkel san

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