Lyrics:

I’m scared that one day I’ll 
Look you up on the internet 
And the newest picture will be two years old
You’re flying to the moon again
Dreaming about fake heroin
Could I get your picture before you go?

And I’m scared again he said he’d 
Hook me up with some crystal meth
I kinda wanted to do it but I said no
I’m flying in my room again
Dreaming of my days on Ritalin
I’ll be fine if they just increase my dose

And I don’t wanna know
If I’ll make it to twenty-one
Will I be in line at the liquor store?
When midnight hits, will I be at the door?
Well, I don’t need to know

This girl I knew just died
So suddenly, and I think I cried
We didn’t get along and now she’s a ghost
She directed funerals 
Before she overdid it on the fentanyl 
And when I got high last month, there was some in the coke

I wore the lipstick that she gave me
She told me that it wasn’t her shade
I think I talked too much shit
‘Cause I didn’t know
Now I’m scared to get high again
But I really want more stimulants
But just one mistake and I’m on death row

And I don’t wanna know
If I’ll make it to twenty-one
Will I be in line at the liquor store?
When midnight hits, will I be at the door?
Well, I don’t need to know
No, I don’t need to know 

I’m never gonna let you save me
But I think I just might let you play me
You didn’t change when you got off all that dope
And I let you call me baby
Then you spun the fuck out and did a 180
But I’m sitting here singing songs of hope

I’m not a Christian or a pagan
But whatever you can do to get off the pavement
In the end, it was me who needed it the most
I could’ve cried ‘cause my heart was breaking
But I took the bus up to shiny LA and I
Wore my pink diamonds on skid row

And I don’t wanna know
If I’ll make it to twenty-one
Will I be in line at the liquor store?
When midnight hits, will I be at the door?
Well, I don’t need to know

And will you be in line at the liquor store
With all of the drunks just waiting for more
Well, I guess I don’t need to know
I don’t need to know
I don’t need to know
No, I don’t need to know

Will you be alive at the liquor store?
At six AM, will you be at the door?
Well, I guess I don’t need to know

Don't Need To Know

Lyrics:

Perfume on my ankles
Assumed we’d get tangled up again
We can’t be friends

I like it from that angle
I feel like if you strangled me I’d be fine
But could you please be kind?

And if you get back on heroin
Call me while you’re high
And if you fly to California
I’ll let you in
In me, all over again

You say you miss me baby, well
Good thing I’m fucking crazy
Say I’m divine
Keep you on my mind

And I know the pain of maybe so
Give me a chance, I’ll take it
I wanna try
So baby I’m down for the ride

And if you get back on heroin
Call me before you die
I’ve got a flight to Carolina
Just let me in
Your life, all over again

You say I’m too unstable but
You think you talked to Satan
Just driving here
You always disappear

You don’t trust me to be faithful
But it’s all projection
Babe, you’re so insecure 
What am I still doing here?

And if you come back to Earth again
Tell me, what did you hear?
Did you hear me calling out to you
Through the gods in your ear?
Beside me
But you’re not really there

You said you didn’t mean it and you
Misused the word “facetious”
You’ve said enough
I called your bluff

You still want me to stay though
But boy, that’s not on the table
I’ll pack my stuff
It’s not me that you love

And if you want me back
In bed again
Call me, yeah you can try
But your phone will only ring one time
And your texts won’t send
Did you know
That I’d cut you off again?

Been trying to be tranquil but
You make me so damn angry
I’m always kind
But you never mind

Boy, you look striped and spangled
The string of my heart dangles
From the sky
In the airport lights

And if you get back on her again
Don’t call me 
When she says goodbye
And if you cry and think you miss me
Don’t tell our friends
You won’t see me
Ever again

Now I’m back in California
And you can’t come in
In me
Ever again

God damn, who fucking raised you?

If you’re leaving Carolina
You can’t come in
And me,
Baby, I’m not your friend

I’m Not Your Friend (Just Another Song)

I don’t have the full song recorded but I thought I’d still upload what I do have. It’s based on the children’s book Runaway Bunny.

Runaway Bunny (Unfinished)

Recorded this 3 or 4 years ago. My voice was a little rough but I like the song.

Lyrics:

Paradoxical 
That's impossible 
You can take the glock
But don't fire no shots at me

Past the brink
I watch your profits sink
I like 
How this plays out each time

What the hell were you thinking?
Blank stare, no blinking, I
(Got you)

You can only win if you don't play
I'm thinking from the end
It's a dope game
Think a hundred for one's a good deal, hey?
Well, you get some competition, money's at stake

Paranormal
Tell me, why so formal, hey? 
Well I got you torn
By this debt, I warned ya 
It's in my name

And I coulda sworn 
You looked better before 
You're not young anymore
It’s fun to watch you transform 
You look so forlorn but you stay

You should really cut your losses, take a switchblade to 'em
All in, you're committed, dug your own grave  
Staying high for the win, gotta maintain
But you should minimize your debt, I'm gonna get paid 

They say it's an addiction 
But you're calling it commitment
Can't leave but you can't afford to stay
And you call it contradiction
But I'm calling it submission 
Can't leave, sure as hell can't stay
I won't leave till I get paid

I'm waiting till you see 
That you've been played
Can't back down
'Cause it's too late now
You'll never stop 
Drowning in this kool-aid 
So I'll watch you drink it down
Know you love the taste

I’m waiting till you see 
That you've been played
Can't back down
'Cause it's too late now

Don't Play

Lyrics:

If all is fair in love and war
Then why don’t you just kill me?
You know I’m always keeping score
So why don’t you fulfill me?

You’ve lived enough to know some things
But not enough to read me
I’m woman enough to hear you think
You’re not going to deceive me

I showed you a picture with sound
But you ain’t heard nothing yet
You spin me around and around
While you hold my end like thread

I fell and I don’t know how
‘Cause your skull is filled with webs
You speak and you say it proud
But there’s dust inside your head

Why do you act like a clown?
Did you grow up without friends?
Were your toys all hand-me-downs
Or did your parents feed you lead?

If all’s the same in love and war
A heart’s the spade that kills me
You’ve loved enough, you should know more
So why don’t you fulfill me?

You’re close enough to pull some strings
But not enough to keep me
I’m woman enough to know some things
You’re not getting off so easy

I showed you a picture with sound
But you ain’t heard nothing yet
You heard me sing for the crowd
But you only heard one set

I’m all turned upside down
Like your lucky cigarette
You light me up, put me out
Then you move on to the next

You breathe me in, blow a cloud
Then you do it all again
But soon I’ll be all burnt out
Disappear right in your hand



I showed you a picture with sound
But you ain’t heard nothing yet
You heard me sing for the crown
But you only heard one set

I’m all turned upside down
Like your lucky cigarette
But you left your reds at the house
And I’m the only one that’s left

You light me up, burn me down
Baby, did you just forget?
There’s a reason I’m upside down
I’m the only one that’s left

You Ain’t Heard Nothing Yet

No Man’s Land

Lyrics:

My Carolina angel
Is talking to the devil again
He thinks that he’s in danger
I think the voices in his head 
Are his only friends

He feels like a stranger
Every time I hear him laugh at something that they said
He’s living in a strange world
I wish that I could understand 
What’s inside his head

He says
“Every time you smile
Someone else frowns”
Well, good thing his smile
Is upside down

We can drive all night
Sleep 'til sundown
Keep going for miles
We’re just cruising around

My birthday’s tonight
And I’m wearing my gown
I sure hope he likes it
And I hope we go out

Is he bored by my words
Or is the devil just loud?
I sure hope he likes me

My Carolina savior
Needs a higher dose of Invega
He’s paranoid about his neighbors
He tries to listen through the walls
Swears he heard his name

I told him that I hate love
I said it tears me up like hard drugs
But when we touch it’s like a flash flood
There’s bloody water in the halls
And it’s all in vain

I say
“I feel like Lana del Rey
On a tour of the south
Kissing a junkie all day
With my open mouth”

He said to breathe through the pain
When he was blowing it out
But he brought back the rain
After a year of drought

And he thinks I’m insane
Yeah, he thinks I’m a clown
But he went to the circus
When it came to town

I performed for the king
And he was wearing his crown
I sure hope he liked me

A bona fide schizo
Didn’t mind it till he said I was cheating
‘Cause he saw it in a vision
I’m this close
To looking for a sooner flight 
So I can come back home

He thinks that I’m unfaithful
Ain’t got a shred of evidence
Snooping through my bags
How could I cheat though?
I didn’t know I was his girl
‘Cause he’s not my man

I said 
“I’m not yours so
What are you yapping about?
You got me fucking floored
I’m burning down your childhood house”

Every time he’s dry
Someone else drowns 
And I’ve been trying but
I just can’t figure him out

He made me cry
That ex he told me about
Turned to the side
And I didn’t make a sound

If she’s the love of your life
Why’d I fly to your town?
Ooh, he thinks he can lie now

Hmm

He took me to Bojangles
So he could buy me sweet tea 
With his daddy’s cash
Had to pay for his food though 
And now we’re back on the road
And I’m paying for gas

Thinks he’s smoother than he is
But baby, just because it’s big
Don’t mean it ain’t trash
Six two little kid
I tower over him in spirit
I look down and laugh

He buys 
Too many marlboro blacks
Instead of food and now
I’m sliding over some cash 
I bet his mama’s proud

Every time I get mad
He plants a seed of doubt
He’s hard to live with
And hard not to drink about

He tried to make me laugh
And sat his ass on the couch
Pretending I wasn’t mad
He had his head in the clouds

Wasn’t coming back
He wasn’t coming down
Ooh, I sure hope he hates me

My Carolina angel
Is talking to the devil again
He saw my body mangled
Says he saw me getting strangled 
By another man

My Carolina vampire
Doesn’t care that he’s bleeding me dry
He’s building up his empire
And the voices in his head 
Are his citizens

I said
“Boy, you think you’re the king
But you’re not wearing a crown
I did tricks in the ring for you
But I never bowed

If she’s the love of your life
Then why’d I fly to your town?
Ooh, you’re playing with fire”

I said
“Boy, I think you’re a fool
Yeah, I think you’re a clown
In a traveling circus
That I followed around

You performed for the queen
When she came to your town
Ooh, you think that she buys it?”

He says
“Every time you smile
Someone else frowns”
Well, good thing his smile
Is upside down

Carolina Angel (Demo)

Rock the Boat

Lyrics:

What do you have to say 
For yourself, Mister Cheney?
Do you have a heart
Or do you have a battery?

How much oil do you need
To grease your war machine?
And if the west is so supreme
Why are you facing east?

What do you have to say 
For yourself, Mister Cheney?
Do you have a heart
And if you do, does it still beat?



As for LBJ
He’s a good man, you see
He only wanted to save
Vietnam from the Vietnamese

What do you have to say 
For yourself, Lyndon B?
Do you have a heart
And if you do, did it ever bleed?



What do you have to say
For yourself, Mr. Sleepy?
Do have a brain?
Do you have your faculties?

The Gaza Strip is under siege 
Air, land, and sea
Bomb civilian families
In the name of democracy

What do you have to say
To all your man-made refugees?
You say it’s just the price of war
To excuse the casualties 

From the river to the sea
Let Palestine be free
Do you have a heart
Or just an empty cavity?

What do you have to say
For yourself, world police?
Taking all you can from the workers 
To fund depravity

Happy birthday, Mr. President
I’m eating yellowcake
To celebrate the American Dream
Today
I bought it off Saddam Hussein
He has a bakery
I don’t know if you knew that
He’s still alive I’m hiding him in my basement
Don’t tell anyone

Mister Cheney (Demo)

It’s never gonna be perfect so might as well release it here’s Johnny


Lyrics:

I’m not your bitch
But I’ll do as you wish
I’m in love with you

I’m not your girl
But I’ll give it a whirl
If you like the view

I’m not your wife
But I’ll stay the night
If you ask me to

I’m not the type
To get on with my life
Après le rendez-vous

You’re a one-trick pony and a jack of no trades
Talk to the moon, then you sleep all day
A ghost of a man, baby that’s okay
I’ll get you out

You could get a good job, make a union wage 
You told me your plans and forgot the next day
But I’m right here, so we’ll be okay
We’ll make it out
Some day

I said Johnny, I wanna be a singer
And I wanna make it big
Like half in the city
And half off the grid

We could be swingers
Or we could have kids
If you’re in town

Johnny, I wanna run away
With the current of the wind
Like a quarter on the coast
A quarter in the sticks

And half in your arms
In your world of sin
‘Cause I’m in love

I’m not your bitch
But I’ll do as you wish
I’m in love with you

I’m not your girl
But I’ll give it a whirl
If you like the view

I’m not your wife
But I’ll stay the night
If you ask me to

I’m not the type
To get on with my life
After losing you

And Johnny, I wanna be a singer
And I wanna make it big
Like half in the city
And half off the grid

We could be swingers
Or we could have kids
If you’re in town

Johnny, I wanna run away
With the current of the wind
Like a quarter on the coast
A quarter in the sticks

The rest in your arms
In a total eclipse
‘Cause I’m in love again

John, you’re a stage five clinger
And I wish I was too
Put you through the wringer
To keep you in the mood

We can keep drinking
But save your money too
Buy me a ring at the pawn shop

Johnny, put it on my finger
It would make you so cool
Tell me that I’m pretty
To keep me in the mood

I wanna be with you 
But you make me so blue
Buy me a drink, take my clothes off

I’m not your bitch
But I do as you wish
When I’m alone with you

I’m not your girl
But I’ll give it a whirl 
‘Cause you look so cool

I’ll never be your wife
But I’ll hop on a flight
If you want me to

I’m not the type
To get on with my life
After leaving you

Johnny, I wanna be in love but you make it so hard
You left so soon, couldn’t make enough art
I want love stories I can write from the heart
But I got none

Johnny, where did you go? Hope it’s not too far
Like half in the sky, and half in your car
You talk to the walls when the sun goes dark
But I’m in love

Johnny

Lyrics:

Here I go again
All on my own

I don’t give a damn about your reputation 
I guess you should’ve thought about the things I’d say
I always tell the truth
That’s bad for you
I’m Satan too

If God were honest he’d admit that you’re a miscreation
But his white lies fortify his mistakes
He’s just like you
A hubristic fool
You’re Jesus too

And I know you think my soul is sweet
And now you want some sugar in hell
Give the tortured souls something to eat
You know my politics, that’s fine with me

Did you meet the hurricane last week?
Did she reach Norman? Did she pass your street?
Or did you only see Helene on TV? And did you think she was sent by me?

You wax poetic, but you’re full of shit
And I’m full of quips and vinegar
But I wax and I wane into the civil war
That’s to come again

I’m sympathetic, but I’m not your bitch
I’m full of salt and vinegar
I brag and complain of all I’ve done
And I’m alone again

I’m alone again

I don’t give a damn about my reputation
And I don’t miss a beat with any word I say
I always tell the truth
That’s harsh for you
I’ll paint you blue

And all that I could think in my inebriation
Was how I should’ve seen it from a mile away
I guess you told the truth
Without trying to
I still blame you 

And I know my soul is bittersweet
And now I want some sugar
Give my anemic heart something to eat
You know my appetite, it’s kinda weak

Did I feel the tides turn last week?
Will I get happy? Will I find some peace?
Or did I only see Selene in my dreams?
And if I did, was she sent for me?

You wax poetic, but you’re bad with words
And I am far superior
You wax and you wane in and out of my life
And we’re apart again

You’re so pathetic, you’re such a bitch
I think we might be similar
I brag and complain of all I’ve done
And I’m alone again 

I’m alone again

I wax poetic, but I’m full of shit
I think we might be similar 
The wax of my wings brings civil war
When it melts again

I’m so prophetic, I must admit
I’ve been so keen and cynical
The dark night of the soul is all I know
When the foe is dead

I wax poetic, but I’m full of shit
I think we might be similar 
And if you’re not on the ticket, I’ll write you in
So I am whole again

I’m alone again
Take me home again
I’m alone

Hellene (Hurry Selene!)

Lyrics:

I had a dream I thought that
You were gonna kill me in my sleep
I was looking at the knives
While you lost count of your sheep

I was planning how to hide them
You had scars on your chest
And every time we touched, you bled

It’s all bloody water under the bridge
I don’t miss you
But I love you

It’s my birthday cake in your fridge
I won’t kiss you
But I might call you

When I met you, I was a kid
It was stupid
How much I loved you

I’m so tired, can we just be friends?
Because I love you

I had a drink, I had another
Till I almost couldn’t breathe
Had my tongue all on your face
Licked the mark of the beast

I was holding all my cards
Kept them close to my chest
But every time we touched, you read them

It’s all bloody water under the bridge
I don’t miss you
But I love you

It’s my birthday cake in your fridge
I won’t kiss you
But I might call you

When I knew you, I was afraid
But now that I’ve left you
I can say I love you

Think I’ll die if love makes me wait
But I don’t want you

Yeah it’s all water under the bridge
I don’t miss you
But I love you

It’s my birthday cake in your fridge
I won’t kiss you
But I might call you

When I met you, I was a kid
It was stupid
How much I loved you

I’m so tired, can we just be friends?
Because I love you
(I’m with you always)

Under The Bridge

Lyrics:

I’m a strong codependent young woman
Scared to leave, just as scared to stay
Is it wrong that I feel like a woman
The most when a man comes to save me?

I’m a fawn in my bed when he’s with me
I get drunk just open my heart
Is it wrong that I feel like a woman
The most when I’m in his arms?

I’m half in love and half out the door
You say you want me, you want me but
I think I want you more
Can I love you like a woman should?
Do you want me, you want me or not?

I’m half in love
And half out the door
You say you want me
But I think I want you more

Am I a real woman
Or just a stupid whore?
Why does no one fall in love with me?

I was so lonely
Or maybe I was bored
I don’t want you for the sex
I want you to keep me warm

Doesn’t mean I love you
Just because I wanted more
But could you pretend that you love me?

His hair is blonde
From a box, not the sun now
His gold teeth don’t shine

His life paused
When he moved back to his hometown
Now half his heart is mine

Let me love you like a woman
Do you want me or not?

I’m a real smart girl
But no one seems to care
They see linen and curls
And they wanna pull my hair

I’m sorry that you saw me
Almost crying on the stairs
‘Cause I like you more than you like me

You wanna touch me
But it’s more than I can bear
And no, you can’t come over
‘Cause I want you and I’m scared

I’m sorry that you saw me
Almost falling off my chair
‘Cause you hold your liquor better than me

His hair is blonde
From a box, not the sun now
His gold teeth don’t shine

His life paused
When he moved back to his hometown
Now half his heart is mine

I’m not his fairytale love
I’m a whore now
Can you tell if that’s a lie?

I found god 
When I visited his hometown
And he wasn’t very kind

Let me fuck you like a woman should
Do you love me or not?

[Key Change]

My hair was blonde
When he met me, now it’s dull brown
My blue eyes don’t shine

I tried to reach him
But he wouldn’t let his guard down
Now half his pain is mine

I’m not his fairytale love
I’m a whore now
Can he tell if that’s a lie?

I found god 
When I visited his hometown
And he wasn’t very kind

Strong Codependent Young Woman

Lyrics:

You tell me to jump
I say, “How high?”
You tell me you’re done
I say, “Goodbye”

You tell me to fly
I say, “Into what sky?”
As I hollow my bones out

You call me “deer”
Then you turn on your brights
I haunt all the roads
That you used to drive

You tell me jump
I say, “Off of what bridge?
They’ve got fences on the Colorado.”

Your hair is blonde
From a box, not the sun now
Your gold teeth don’t shine

Your life paused
When you moved back to your hometown
Now half your heart is mine

I’m not your fairytale love
I’m a whore now
Can you tell if that’s a lie?

I found god 
When I visited your hometown
And he wasn’t very kind

You tell me to jump
I say, “How high?”
You tell me you’re done
I say, “Goodbye”

You tell me to fly
I say, “Into what sky?
Are there stars there to catch me?”

You say you love me
And I don’t reply
What do you do?
You drive into the night?

Do you have regrets?
Am I the love of your life?
Do you finally want me?

Do you know that I’m smart?
Do you know that I’m kind?
Do I haunt all music
That you used to like?

You call me “deer”
Then you turn on your brights
As I empty my heart out

My hair was blonde
When you met me, now it’s dull brown
My blue eyes don’t shine

I tried to reach you
But you wouldn’t let your guard down
Now half your pain is mine

I’m not your fairytale love
I’m a whore now
Can you tell if that’s a lie?

I found god 
When I visited your hometown
And he wasn’t very kind

I tell you to run
While I’m holding a knife
I just wanna chase you
Don’t want you to die

You say you love me
What took you so long?
I’m fucking jumping off the Coronado

How High?

Lyrics:

Burning pepper trees
My mind’s run its course on my memories
Tired amphetamines
You never know just what I need
The yard’s turned to ashes
Well that’s just what happens
When heaven crumbles in on itself
Hope’s a lovely paralytic
But it feeds off of its own wealth

Lonely Eden bleeds
What’s to be done when you’ve tried it all?
The wind planting seeds
She’s guilty every time she falls
Compliance just to pass it
But it all seems so vapid
When the system crumbles in on itself
I guess I’m just another critic
But I thought that maybe I could help

The ruby gates of hell
Got me so compelled
They welcome me—they’re open
And when I’m choking on fire
I’ll be none the wiser
But I tried

Had to leave behind my shell
In the earthly realm
With no protection—now it’s broken
No one heard me screaming my name
It’s like I never came
Back down

New incisions seethe
Burns like they’re swimming in alcohol
Surging network bleeds
I don’t get scared at all
And I tried to hold it back
But I don’t work like that
Can’t keep my nihilistic views to myself
All these simple existentialists
Stacking tacky lines on their shelves

Standing on your own
An addict in denial—you’ve lost it all
You’ll always feel alone
Your chance of resurrection is small
Now you’ve come to the rapids
Think I’m trippin’ on acid
Keep your hedonistic views to yourself
Tried your way and I’m sick of it
I crave what you think you’ve dealt

The ruby gates of hell
Got me so compelled
They welcome me—they’re open
And when I’m choking on fire
I’ll be none the wiser
But I tried

Had to leave behind my shell
In the earthly realm
With no protection—now it’s broken
No one heard me screaming my name
It’s like I never came
Back down

Devil above me’s insane
Lucifer killed ten
God’s reign/rain killed all but two
No one heard me screaming my name
It’s like I never came
Back down

Dah dah dah dah dum
Dah dah dah dah dum
Dah dah dah dah dum

Dah dah dah dah dum
Dah dah dah dah dum
Dah dah dah dah dum

Dah dah dah dah dum
Dah dah dah dah dum
Dah dah dah dah dum

Dah dah dah dah dum
Dah dah dah dah dum
Dah dah dah dah dum

Dah dah dah dah dum
Dah dah dah dah dum
Dah dah dah dah dum

Dah dah dah dah dum
Dah dah dah dah dum
Dah dah dah dah dum

Dah dah dah dah dum
Dah dah dah dah dum
Dah dah dah dah dum

Dah dah dah dah dum
Dah dah dah dah dum
Dah dah dah dah dum

Heaven is Red

Singer-songwriter
@isabelclovers on instagram

Isabel Clovers

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