A paen to the king of salamanders.

(Image by Scott Marshall)

Hellbender

A little ditty for the parasitic South American catfish universally feared for its infamous (fabled?) inclination to swim up the mammalian dik dik, and lodge itself there with razor sharp opercular spines. A word of advice, whether the legends are true or not, maybe don't go swimming in the Amazon without your penis thong strapped firmly in place.
Image by Scott Marshall

Candiru

A paen to our favorite monotreme.

First there were some
Then there was one...
Soon there'll be none

(Image by Scott Marshall)

Echidna

The SOLENODONS PARADOXUS is one of the most unique and rare mammals in the world. It looks like a large, plump shrew with elongated snout and multicolored fur. Solenodons grow to about a foot long, and their naked, scaly tails can add another 10 inches. 

The second lower incisor has a narrow groove ("Solenodon" derives from the Greek "grooved tooth"), through which flows a venomous saliva secreted by the submaxillary gland, making the solenodon one of only a handful of venomous mammals.

S. paradoxus has glands in the armpits and in the groin, which are said to give off a goat-like smell. It readily defends itself against one of its own kind and is apparently  NOT IMMUNE TO IT’S OWN VENOM, since animals have been seen to die after fighting and sustaining minor wounds. It may also attack other animals savagely: a captive solenodon was reported to have attacked a young chicken and torn it to pieces with its strong claws before eating it. In moments of excitement it may grunt like a pig or give bird-like cries, but when pursued it stays motionless and hides its head, making it easy to capture-- a number of biological and behavioral paradoxes that must have influenced the scientists who named it.

Both sexes are similar. Males have an unexposed penis and the testes are hidden deep within the abdominal cavity. Females have an irregular estrus period that is apparently unrelated to seasonal changes; they may have two litters of one to three young per year. Usually only two of the offspring survive, because the female only has two teats, which are found near her buttocks. 

They are not very numerous, existing only on the island of Hispaniola (Haiti/Dominican) where they are called "agouta." During daylight hours they stay in their burrows, trees, hollowed-out logs or caves, remaining hidden from view. When they do come out, they run on their toes with a stiff ungainly waddle, following an erratic, almost zigzag course. Its claimed that the agouta never runs in a straight line. When a solenodon is alarmed and tries to move faster, it is very likely to trip.

Solenodon pic by Scott Marshall

Paradoxus

The true story of a black rogue elephant that ran amok in the Moyar Valley of India in the early 20th century. Shot in the spine by a starving Indian farmer, (whose crops he had been raiding), the black rogue took vengeance on the region--with particular vitriol directed at bicycles and their riders. Eventually tracked down and put out of his misery by the greatest of great white hunter-authors, Kenneth Anderson.
Image by Scott Marshall

The Black Rogue

The adult stage of the larval hellgrammite, found under stones in rivers and creeks. One of the best smallmouth bass baits, hellgrammites are known for wriggling enticingly while hooked. They can also deliver a painful bite with their mandibles.

Image by Scott Marshall

The Dobson Fly

The adult stage of the larval hellgrammite, found under stones in rivers and creeks. One of the best smallmouth bass baits, hellgrammites are known for wriggling enticingly while hooked. They can also deliver a painful bite with their mandibles.

Image by Leighton Kelly

Landlord Lamprey

Tardigrades are tough little microscopic bastards. Known to exist in the vacuum of space, in the depths of the ocean, and inside active volcanoes, it dawns on us that tardigrades may in fact be running things.

Image by Scott Marshall

Tardigrade

Tuba-driven swamp metal from the tide pools of San Francisco Bay...

Kirk Lombard -- Vox, diddley bat, harmonica
Cary Kirk -- Guitar
Wiley Evans -- Tuba
Josh Lindenfeltzer -- Drums

The Dik Diks

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