

When the buzz is gone
And I think I'm done
There's always another one
To take me back
To where I want to be
Constantly
Or so I think

When I'm dry
And ain't high
And I don't know the reasons why
I keep going on when nothing seems to matter
And life is so flat
And the days are done and shattered

Go the straight and narrow
And be a good soul
Don't end up like a problem
Keep yourself to your goals
And when you think
You wanna jump off a cliff
You're not the only one
Everyone's adrift

Need a lift?
Find a gift.
Maybe a rebirth of your soul
Take its toll

I know my affliction
And all my addictions
And the constant craving
Of living on the edge
Of death
Maybe this hit will be my last breath

When the buzz is gone
And I think I'm done
There's always another one
To take me back
To where I want to be
Constantly
Or so I think

When I'm dry
And ain't high
And I don't know the reasons why
I keep going on when nothing seems to matter
And life is so flat
And the days are dull and shattered

I'm so empty
Empty I could die
And the only thing to fill me
Is bullshit and lies
So don't try to make sense to me
I'm too numb
Don't want to see the way it should be
In my distorted reality

When the buzz is gone
And I think I'm done
There's always another one
To take me back
To where I want to be
Constantly
Or so I think

When I'm dry
And ain't high
And I don't know the reasons why
I keep going on when nothing seems to matter
And life is so flat
And the days are dull and shattered






Distorted Reality

Fascism is Back in Fashion - Gothic Funk & AudioBake

https://soundcloud.com/experiments-in-error

Steven Vellou Horne & AudioBake

WHAT SHOULD I DO WITH THIS PENT UP ENERGY
SHOULD I UNLEASH IT ON SOME UNSUSPECTING WORLD
PERHAPS IF I WERE YOU I’D GO ON A KILLING SPREE
BUT IS THAT REALLY ME, AM I THE SORT TO STRIKE OUT AT HUMANITY
AM I THE SORT
>
DO I WANT TO CHANGE THE WORLD
CHANGE THE WAY YOU THINK
MAKE THE WORLD A BETTER PLACE
OR BRING IT TO THE BRINK OF MASS EXTINCTION
>
MASS EXTINCTION
>
DO I WANNA GO ON ANOTHER KILLING SPREE
IS THIS THE ONLY SOLUTION
TO FLUSH AWAY THIS HUMAN POLUTION
SHOULD I SNUFF OUT THE SUN
AND FLUSHI AWAY THIS HUMAN POLUTION
>
DO I WANNA GO ON ANOTHER KILLING SPREE
IS THIS THE ONLY SOLUTION
TO FLUSH AWAY THIS HUMAN POLUTION
>
KILLING SPREE, KILLING SPREE, KILLING SPREE
>
TORN BETWEEN THE URGE TO DECIMATE THE EARTH
OR USE HIS POWER FOR GOOD, REMOVING EVERY CURSE
YOUR GOD IS SO CONFLICTED, HE SEES THINGS GETTING WORSE
THINKS IT'S TIME WE WERE EVICTED, TIME HE PUT THE BIG BANG IN REVERSE
>
TIME HE PUT THE BIG BANG IN REVERSE
THE TIME HAS COME, THE TIME FOR YOUR ANNIHILATION
>
TIME HE PUT THE BIG BANG IN REVERSE
>
FRANKLY HUMANKIND, YOU’RE A PAIN IN THE ASS
I CAN’T WAIT TO WIPE YOU OUT EN MASSE
>
TIME HE PUT THE BIG BANG IN REVERSE
>
YOU’VE BEEN ON DEATH ROW FOR SIX THOUSAND YEARS
IT’S TIME TO INTRODUCE YOU TO YOUR GREATEST FEAR
THIS ENERGY WILL CONSUME YOU ONE AND ALL
I’M SNUFFING OUT THE SUN
>
TIME HE PUT THE BIG BANG IN REVERSE
>
I’M SNUFFING OUT THE SUN
>
TIME HE PUT THE BIG BANG IN REVERSE

Snuffing Out The Sun

Look at what you've done
Look at what you did
Who the fuck you think you are
Who you trying to kid
Thought that you were king shit
Unlike any other
But you're just a piece of shit
Who tried to kill his mother

Kill your mother
Kill your mother
Mother fucker
Unlike any other

I fucking hate you
And everything you are
You're just a pathetic worm
Who thinks he is a star
Slither through the shit and mud
You're a parasite
Who is the unlucky one
Who is in your site

I've seen your type before
I read you like a book
Childish. Predictable.
Sum you up with a look
You dont even need to speak
For me to know your trash
Burn in hell, mother fucker
Kiss my fucking ass

You target the innocent
You never take the blame
Anger. Hatred. Vomit
You only evoke shame
Whatever it was that happened
In your fucked up days
Rotted you so badly
In so many ways
You realize you have nothing
And you never did
So I'll ask again
Who the fuck you trying to kid.

Fucking human parasite
Consume.  Destroy.  And smother.
Life's too fucking hard for you
But please dont Kill your mother

What'd she ever do to you
What's so fucking bad
Maybe it really bothers you
That she fucked your dad
The day that you became life
The day that she gave birth
Is the day God spat on you
You are nothing of any worth

A helpless child.
A little boy
Eternal victim
Devoid of joy
Predator,  the worst
Victims for your needs
Confuse them with your twisted shame
Hateful emotional greed

I know you and I see you
I can diffuse you like a bomb
I knew it before you did
That you'd try to kill your mom

Don't Kill Your Mother

N 309 JLL-NG

So you wanna hear
My backstory
Well there ain't no tragedy
Ain't no fucking glory
Just a lot of fucking trauma
That would bore you to death
But it put fire in my breath

Let me tell you about you
You pathetic worm
You think you got it figured out
But I see you suffer and squirm
Go through the motions of a lost life
Become a slave to the wage
Is it existence or mindless strife

When you go to church
And sit in the pews
Do you think
This is what God wanted for you
You can create But you destroy
Spend your time and money
Playing with children's toys
Too dumb to think
Yeah. Its too tough
Let others make the rules
One vote is good enough
Because you're convinced
That there is nothing you can do
Thats what's wrong with the world
Full of people just like you

People like you
People like you
Useless as rocks
Sorry but it's true
And the real fucking problem
Is you think that you have value
And others
They believe it too

But some of us can see
The shit on your fingers
The stench of your soul
The odor that always lingers
The ways you're all so false and fake
You see it's not just me
You give God a fucking headache



God's Headache

I hope I die soon
But my doctor says I won't
I want a gun
But my therapist says don't
So I do a lot of drugs
And I hope they'll cause my death
Every time I take a hit
I hope it takes away my breath

Yeah yeah yeah
Fuck it all 

I hope I die soon
But my doctor says I won't
I want a gun
But my therapist says don't
So I do a lot of drugs
And I hope they'll cause my death
Every time I take a hit
I hope it takes away my breath

Yeah

Hope



You will never be free from pain.
You will never be fully understood.
You will never get the childhood you needed.
No one is coming to save you.
You will be misunderstood and unrecognized.
You will want things you’ll never get.
Your body will keep breaking down.
The world will never be fair.
You will always have to fight for meaning.
You will die with unfinished shit.
You will never be enough for everyone.
You will always get triggered by old wounds.
You will always feel out of place.
You will not get closure.
You will lose people who mattered more to you.
You will never know if you truly mattered.
You won’t get back the stolen years.
You will always be haunted by alternate versions of you.
Happiness will never last.
Most people lie to themselves.
Telling the truth will cost you.
You will always have to explain yourself.
You will question your worth until you die.
Love will not fix you or them.
No one will fully get you.
You won’t ever arrive.
You will always feel like you’re faking it.
Your needs will always feel like a burden.
The world won’t care that you’re tired.
Grief will never go away.
You will not get justice for what was done to you.
Your best qualities came from suffering 



Facts of Life

What the fuck
Is wrong with you?
Why are you here?
What did they say?
What was it
That made you
Come my way,

Today?

I don't feel
Very comfortable
Right now
You make me feel so ill
Make my fucking
Spine run chills
And I don't wish you
Any true ill will
But get away from me
Or I will need
A lot of pills

Oh no

What the fuck
Is wrong with you
Asking me
How I am
Like you fucking care
I can see right through
Your stare

What the fuck
Is wrong with you
Taking all my air
Are you doing this
On a dare
Go meet that monster and see
Is she like
You and me

But if I were
Would I truly say
What the fuck
Is wrong with you

Today



Maybe Nothing


I feel everything but show nothing.
I smile when I want to scream.
I push people away then beg them to stay.
I want closeness but I'm terrified of it.
I blame myself for everything.
I don’t know who I am.
I say I’m fine when I’m not.
I fear being a burden.
I fall apart in silence.
I punish myself for needing love.
I hate being seen but hate being invisible more.
I don’t trust anyone fully.
I expect abandonment even when I’m loved.
I second-guess every word I say.
I isolate to feel safe but feel worse when alone.
I crave connection then feel trapped by it.
I apologize for existing.
I feel guilt for things I didn’t do.
I downplay my pain so no one leaves.
I remember every rejection.
I replay every conversation.
I absorb other people’s moods.
I pretend I don’t care when I care too much.
I want to disappear without being forgotten.
I keep quiet so no one hates me.
I fear being too much and not enough.
I fake stability to stay accepted.
I feel broken but act put together.
I never ask for help but wish someone would notice.
I survive by staying silent.




N 309 JLL-NG

JLL-NG

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