willandra

lyrics:
talk about an emotional summit
and talk about our lives feeling rigid
it's all, it's all about your money
it never was about me, was it?
(it's not like i miss you, it's just)
(it's not like i miss you anymore)

you don't say you miss me
i don't say i care
we're not gonna talk
for like a hundred something years
and every time i sleep
another memory disappears
i wish i never threw away the shoes
i miss the crease
it almost feels like part of you
will never really leave
it's almost like my heart
has never belonged on my sleeve
it's almost like my safety
was something that you could keep

something that you could keep

cover of kodak moment by Jane Remover

lyrics:
how does it feel to be the front of the line?
(do you feel like home?)
when was the last time you got caught telling lies?
(was it last night?)
i know you hate to see me like this
but winter's uninvited
cause i don't know how to stop the cold from coming in
i kept my coat on 'til the summer and it pissed you off
still don't know what I did wrong so i scrambled to keep it on
when it gets brought up in conversations i just wanna run
but i can't go very fast 'cause i got weights all on my tongue

don't talk if it's not your turn
just to watch the world burn
it's all your fault
don't blame me for what i didn't cause
you got lost chasing time again
it's all right
you got lost chasing time again
it's all right, it's all good

kodak moment

i forgot to post this
circa february 2024

heartbeat (jersey remix)

cover of https://soundcloud.com/any1else
original song: https://soundcloud.com/any1else
https://linktr.ee/any1else

my melatonin stopped working a week ago

try hard to try to be
somebody to keep close
to want something to leave
to know that isn't home
to keep yourself at bay
from everything you love
to not be one to be

washed out, the ripple is gone
(i don't see anybody else)
work out and die before long
(be just like everybody else)
lost everything i was
(i can't see anybody else)
rebuilt, then re-payed costs
(i've never been more lost)

and when all will re-enter the fray;
pseudonyms turn into names
lies of past turn into truths
stories to be told just stay
reset buttons yearned just poof
"we'll be back another day"
memory/fountain of youth
rewind, sit back, watch it play

and when all will re-enter the fray;
pseudonyms turn into names
lies of past turn into truths
stories to be told just stay
reset buttons yearned just poof
"we'll be back another day"
memory/fountain of youth
rewind, sit back, watch it play

rake me back, kill me again
rake me back, call me again
rake me back, kill me again
rake me back, call me again
rake me back, kill me again
rake me back, call me again
rake me back, kill me again
rake me back, call me again

rake me back (kill me again)

i'll burn a hole in my head with a friction burn
(oh, please come save me from myself, i'm so hyperbolic)
i will bleed out on my desk, if it makes me learn
(and he weaponizes me, only to be so much more)
it swells inside of me, my wrists will follow suit
(i'm doing what i love the most, and it still makes me pissed)
so i'll burn a hole in my head with a friction burn

(anxious dug nails dig the crease in my palms)

(i know that)
i said things were always this way, but i'm lying again
(it's a built in part of me, i am a drama queen)
i quit what i love all the time and blame it on my friends
(it's a built in part of me, i am a drama queen)
there's a prize outside my head [that] envy and wrath are trying to earn
(it's a built in part of me, i am a drama queen)
so i'll burn a hole in my head with a friction burn

friction burn

she day-drinks until she hits me, i'm seeing stars
"enjoy the pyrotechnics"
and there's only a reason to want her gone
don't love the life i'm left with
replaying every time i should have had fun
she left me swollen and dented
when i look in her eyes, i turn into someone i'm not

would you tighten the leash on my neck?
i'll pray it makes a difference this time
will you hold me tight?
it doesn't end if i turn it off
would you brighten my eyes just this once?
i'll say nothing my mother won't like
say it'll be fine
when she hits me until i'm seeing stars

when she talks like she's me, i forget myself
with too easy an entrance
can't tell which one of us it is i want dead
are we interconnected?
would a guillotine or my palms brick my brain
in a quicker time?
and i don't want this life
if she's my legacy the day i'm gone

would you tighten the leash on my neck?
i'll pray it makes a difference this time
will you hold me tight?
it doesn't end if i turn it off
would you brighten my eyes just this once?
i'll say nothing my mother won't like
say it'll be fine
when she hits me until i'm seeing stars

willandra

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