Hey, what's up? My name's Korcid. I want to thank you in advance for taking time out of your day to experience my project. This is the poem that inspired the whole album, and I just want to share the message I have for God. So, without any further ado, let's get into it.

I fear no man, deity, or any form of incarceration. The only things I fear are the memories I drink to escape from. So fuck love with everything wrapped up in it

I'd much rather sell my soul to get rich than die lonely naked. Before I ever considered the thought, you only noticed my image, not my personality nor my spirit of winning. I've crossed many roads and obstacles for those I've claimed as my own, and I regret that shit as the days go on. Regardless, if you're my mom, spouse, or son, caring or being nice got me nowhere in life, and I'd much rather hang those thoughts up in the rain to dry. I've earned every scar, even the nine burn marks I left on my right arm, as a reminder.

To choose myself for once when it gets dark
You know, I always thought being sober was easier. Turns out I just missed the poisonous liquid after quitting, thoug. It left me full of anxiety, and I can't stop shaking.

Thank God for the bottle of misplacement
Reminiscing life is like a fixed game, I self-sabotage, causing myself nothing but anger and pain. Maybe it's just the thrill or the way I look when I hold a knife, fuck man.

Maybe it's the dedication I put into every thought on how I want to die. Because let's face it, I'm the only one that ever gave a fuck about my life. You know, maybe when the truth comes, I'll finally know the reasons why.
I never once attempted to live my life.

I still haven't even acknowledged one fucking accomplishment. You know, thinking about it, I was probably stumbling drunk when I took my first step. If you can't understand or comprehend the dark side of my mind, then I don't want you to ever applaud for me when I finally get a grip on life.

So stay on that sinking ship don't switch up, because all in all, my response will be to eat a dick. So fuck the free world and everybody in it.

Diary of an Alcoholic

Diary God

Dear God

We all know how it goes
One day we're born
One day we die
How can we tell if any of our present actions have any significance at all
If we don't know where we're going or what we're going to become
Then what is the meaning of life
To plague humanity ever since we became sentient
These were the ties I had with Ty
Well, for reasons you know why

With every cigarette drag, the memories would linger in
Tyler and I were blood, more than just best friends
I remember us beatboxing on the weekends in my mother's basement
When we weren't stoned, super smashed, gaming
Our friendship was real with no sense of direction
We were like Gorilla Glue, inseparable and strong
But as time went on, our environments changed and we didn't get along
Love can be dangerous, especially for those in broken places
Tyler's case was no exception
I wish we could go back to them days when we were young and carefree in so many ways

As life spins its tail, like an apple on a tree
Deception lurks close, a bitter truth to see
Truce-inclusive guys, subjective in its lines
Leaving me awake, pondering wrongs and rights that intertwine

That first flame must have felt warm inside, lighting the torch for future delight
I believe Danny was her name
Ty would speak highly all the time, thinking he was the luckiest guy alive
Finding his soulmate before the age of 29
But like with all toxic relationships, it was never the real thing that was being displayed
She would lie, cheat, blame, and cheat
But she would never tell the truth
Because she didn't know what she was talking about
Like with all toxic relationships, it was never the real thing that was being displayed
She would lie, cheat, blame him, and play games
I do my best to reach out, but alcohol seemed to help him more with the pain

As life spins its tail, like an apple on a tree
Deception lurks close, a bitter truth to see
Truce-inclusive guys, subjective in its lines
Leaving me awake, pondering wrongs and rights that intertwine

After the breakup, Tyler was doing great at managing his life
until that fateful day, Danny popped in, holding a fifth of Jim
In her other hand was a switchblade knife, claiming she had his kid
Blaming him for the mistake, even flirting with his friend with the idea that he was a piece of shit
convinced him to pay for expenses
The truth was an email with a faulty DNA script, with no court date attachment
Love is truly a dangerous game, and it's hard to complain since I was

As life spins its tail, like an apple on a tree
Deception lurks close, a bitter truth to see
Truce-inclusive guys, subjective in its lines
Leaving me awake, pondering wrongs and rights that intertwine

Tyler went mad, lashing out at anyone who would argue about that kid he never met
On the final night, alcohol hit him pretty bad
Tyler left me a voicemail around 6am
Slurring off the confessions before putting the shotgun to his head
I vowed that morning the bitch would be dead
It's been four years since, and I'm still pretty pissed
Four lives were devastated over a blacked out bitch

In many different religions
A deity made the entire universe
Put us all in it
And whatever we do on this earth will be used to determine
When and how we spend eternity afterwards

Diary of an alcoholic

Tyler's Tale

I wish I could witness seeing without awareness I wish the drugs n alcohol fried the light bulb chilling upstairs I wish I had my dad's ego back in his prime driving a Trans Am smoking marble lights fleeing child support dodging baby mommas on sight man I guess some people are just blessed with conference without knowing it I wish I didn't have a stuttering fit a standoff with myself while nervous I wish I wouldn't of frozen on stage feeling dumb after leaving my home state pursuing a fresh slate with 50k that would've been great I wish I wasn't mentally stuck in carbonite staring at the ceiling all night I wish I waited till age of 79 to commit my violent heinous crime by then I'd have the experience to scream fuck this shit as I'm slapping the shit out of gen z grandchildren causing the worlds extinguish I wish I was in a coma brain dead the bullet missing my lung completely at least I'd still be breathing fully right just when you'd throw in the trash bin still bleeding I wish my conscience could aggressively fester and manifest into a new vessel for venous I wish I was another evolution of a screw loose fuck that could hide like a politician in plain sight I wish employers actually gave a fuck instead of the importance of a quote preaching family orientation in every fucking meeting I wish I was more than a social security number drawn out of the corporate hate I wish I could find fulfillment in my environment something easy like a line I could just write on I wish I could find a chick instead of a bimbo bitch that only has an idea with me raising her kids being the catchers mit providing peace of mind when I'm clapping her cheeks from behind I wish I had the heart for greed so I could rob everybody of their material things I wish god was real so they could prove it to me without a gender identity I'm tired of picking sides I could give a fuck less about who's right I just wish I wasn't me.

I just wish I wasn't me

I wish I had a million dollars just to rub in my families face no matter the side I just wanna burn it in one place I wish helping people was simple like flipping tarot cards reading the reversal meaning I wish suffering was easy like an mmo rpg grinding my way through anything I wish the memories were worth the journey I wish healing wasn't a process of waiting wasting time writing everything that came to mind

I just wish I wasn't me. I just wish I wasn't me

I Wish

This was my first recording a few years ago when I went by the name Castor

Single

Mad Scientist

we are born with this dependence into a family that will socialize us into a society they will teach us some aspects of ourselves are loved and accepted our family will judge and reject all the aspects of us that they find unacceptable whether they are positive or negative and will encourage those they find acceptable and with being relationally dependent in order to survive we will do whatever we can to denial and disown those aspects in ourselves that were disapproved of while we exaggerating those that were meant with an approval

I keep both of my eyes locked in the hourglass of the past. I'm blind to the present where shadows of my history shall cast. In the rearview mirror of life, my vision's dance. Nostalgia's weight, an invisible, haunting trance. I winna sell my soul for confidence, reaching all of my accomplishments. Gaining more than just respect, my life will be mentioned with a positive breath. Thou after my dance with death, I got denied upon entry,
It's sad when the devil wouldn't even provide me with the minimum of pity. With a flip of his penny, it landed on heads. He nudged my shoulder, smirked. and said, "Guess what, dawg? I'll give you another chance, so go ahead and make what's best with it. So that's why I'm sharing my music with a friend. I hope you're doing okay, though I'm just comfortably depressed.

I'm breaking through the shadows of the past. In the echoes, I'm finding strength that will forever last. Rising like a phoenix, I face the dance, In the symphony of survival, I take my chance. Comfortably depressed, yet I strive to be a melody of resilience, a soul set free.

In this maze of emotion, I'm lost without guide, navigating through life's storms, with uncertain tides. here lately, I feel fake, an authentic
piece of paper that never shaped. I'm stuck in a matrix, a relentless, unforgiving mindset. Surviving death's shadow, my tale's untold, in job interviews, my past unfolds. Exposing Heartland's embarrassment, those stupid pricks are incompetent. When it comes to counting medications. typing in a Google search will unveil my history. Ashland County only live streamed just for publicity. Applauding a pig that couldn't even assist me. Yet I seek only redemption, resolving with only judgment and misery.
Yet, like a phoenix from ashes, I strive to break free, my silent screams echo, my plea for empathy. In a world turning away, my resilience is tested, A symphony of survival, every note I seem to write is fuckin contested.

I'm breaking through the shadows of the past, In the echoes, I'm finding strength that will forever last. Rising like a phoenix, I face the dance, In the symphony of survival, I take my chance. Comfortably depressed, yet I strive to be, A melody of resilience, a soul set free.

The fact is you reap what you sow, then pay what you owe so when your heart and mind collide, resolve the conflict by using your guts for guidance. I've always placed everyone else. Above myself, that's the origin. This is my best encouragement. Stop placing a negative as the narrative. Replacing every positive as only a possible what if you'll never achieve success with nightmares. That's why I scribble these fucking thoughts. On paper just to fight my fears, the anger has led me down. many roads I regret. that bottle of alcohol though it pretty much raised my bet. Missing organs with an embarrassing scare When I look in the mirror. Cory, I lost who you are. You weren't brave. You caved in by listening. To all the negative shit they would say. I can't blame it on you, though. Even I enjoy. jumping through puddles in the rain.

the important thing to have in mind is that when we suppress a certain aspect in ourselves it does not disappear it does not go away with time it only fades from our awareness, we fall into behavior patterns self-destructive behaviors and all because of our shadow

Shadow

-JFK Intro-
these messages are all the same.
their complacent, self-indulgent
sore of societies that are about to be
swept away with the debre of history
only the determined, only the courage's
only the visionary, who determines the real nature of our struggles, can possibly survive

-intro-
(lighter flicks twice then ripping a bong)
sounds of holding in the smoke
then says, "Wait, I think I got it." I'm going in
Yo, is this mic on? (clear throat)

Ima natural fool, a cheerful, twisted nihilist,
that's designing flaws speculating every thought to overthrow my happiness. the feds slapped a label on me, making claims that I'm more dangerous than a toddler with bad behavior. (fuck them) I'll just spin persuasion, offering balloons abusing my gift of gab, lying for empathy. Spiking bottles a few bottles of Heineken with diet Narcan for two. Ashes mixed ashes, may the world turn to dust. Is it an ironic twist or maybe just my luck? I'll keep it realistic. My mind's morbidly restricted, I'm tempting fate with every snap on my wrist, with this rubber band, for every chance that I get, but I only see to lose my peripheral vision. Yo, in fact, maybe you're not conscious enough to listen.

me as a human being like me is more addictive than coke or smack, so liquefy me on a spoon, soak the cotton pulling' the plunger back remember me I'm your good ol' friend baby cream I still using cheesy lines on older broads with ambitions to clap cheeks I'm a cluster fuck more of a scribbled thought fascinating like the conspiracy surrounding the crack rock
(leave it to fucking korcid)

I sit around the round table with sir lance a lot cooking up the perfect plot for when we leave Camelot hold up wait it's just a thought I'm an odd poet that's trapped within in this write-ical prison my rhymes are so bad they need locked up for treason I live in this world that is real
-outro-
(lighter flicks then ripping a bong)
sounds of holding in the smoke
then says, "Wait, I think I got it."

-JFK Outro-
we do not intend to be lectured
on intervention
by those
whose character was stamped
for all time

Leave it to korcid

Leave it to Korcid

I sip pot, till my eyes pop, topping off jazz cabbage
On second thought, it's too bad I just crumbled my next spot
Yo, when's this vomiting gonna stop, so I can dab up and get this show on
Shhh, pipe down, I can't hear these voices when I speak

I believe the floors pinched my watch last week, right on the dot, as I was indecisive
about menu items
I was puzzled like a non-responsive NPC
Whispers heard, that's absurd sir, blue buds cozy me up, pushing sleep

Wish I could self-inject dopamine, with a needless syringe
My happiness is basic, like the belief of sin
It's all the same bullshit, but with no rehearsal visits
It's all the same actors, but I believe the plot is missing

Colorless green ideas sleep furiously
I sip pot, till my eyes pop, topping off jazz cabbage
I huff beer before sipping pot, filtering the smoke through empty rocks
I huff beer with every ounce of breath, my baby lung is concealed within a brown paperless tin and I use a lag device to track my coordinates
My thoughts deceive, the paranoia's infatuated, plucking petals so she couldn't leave

This iris is trapped inside a capsule, like beauty and the beast, until the night she
decides to dance with me
A blissful lust that lies awake in my dreams
I huff beer with no sense of grief, remaining still inside my head
Bursting bubbles in my bladder, locked in art bucket suite

I huff beer before sipping pot, filtering the smoke through empty rocks
I huff beer with every ounce of breath, my baby lung is concealed within a brown paperless tin, and I use that device to track my coordinates

Sweeping gravel pouring drywall

Huffing Beer Before Sipping Pot

Huffing Beer Before Sippin' Pot

Intro-
I've lost all ambition a worldly a claim
I just want to be the one you love
believe me I don't want to set the world on fire
I need some fucking rum

verse-
It has to be me cause things never seem to work out when I fake it. I smile every day, placing the same frown on my face. this must be a vivid dream like I'm chasing a dragon nervous holding the edge of my seat, I'm sweating profusely. near the peak of my sanity. I could never picture Nirvana without chaos in the distance. Like I'm trapped in fairy tales I've taken the task to save any bitch regardless of my circumstances ( radio sound next applicant) Yurika in the heat of the dull fogged moment during the psychosis huh? what's up doc write me up another script for Risperdal so I can get back to drooling I miss that slow movement fuck why isn't my dick grooving

chorus-
oh well on days like this I self-reflect wondering if life is worth the time If I had a dime for every time I heard that line there'd be no sense in rubbing pennies or deals with demons just to enjoy my restaurant on the fucking weekends

verse-
oh well my life is baked and cheesy my sex life left discreetly the zipper scar on my chest left idiots perplexed awfully curious to guess are you dick less or tired less I'm man not trans isn't obvious bitch ops Parton my French God damn it korcid now I gotta edit that out later the alphabet army will cancel you for sure so what if I cheddar Bob'd my only opportunity that'll be swept under the rug after I mask my voice with auto tune yeah fucking good troop

chores-
oh well on days like this I self-reflect wondering if life is worth the time If I had a dime for every time I heard that line there'd be no sense in rubbing pennies or deals with demons just to enjoy my restaurant on the fucking weekends

verse-
oh well if you wanna do what you want with no fear of consequence just transition grow a set of tits migrate to my home town of Ashland Ohio's capital for hipster hicks that are indecisive with blunts or plopping in a Copenhagen dip a city stuffed full of corrupt politicians it must been a that Ronald Forsthoefel released me at the beginning of his retirement since I'm such a menace to society how come a thousand was the ten percent shit don't feel bad for assisting with my suicide attempt what do you have to worry about just release the footage that was never recorded during the event make sure you puff your chest out proudly when you speak on it bitch

outro-
you told me you fell in with it
haven't gone as I planned

Oh Well

-Intro-
I have control of my mind. Time is on my side. Even though things feel slow, I'm not dragging behind. Yo, I tend to overthink perplexed for a brief sentence. After the beat, hold your breath, recording the message

-verse-
I sit, with no thoughts to think, everything, has connection, a correlation, to the main objective, since life is my question, how do i understand all these lessons, astro projection from the couch, while I'm stressed clicking through static I'm stuck in an unfamiliar home, with the loop on Holding on to these memories when I feel alone. I hate where everything has gone. I just wish you felt the same mom

911 call sample
My son is drunk. He just out of ah Hartland home. Okay? (Angie) three weeks ago, he's been out of his meds. oh, apparently, he has paraphernalia, too. because he said he's going to take me down on it they'll take care of that one. I should have sent him to the group home

-Chorus-
I cannot change how people are,
I have always seen you, like a shooting star.
Offering light to my night sky from a far
my love's heavy gravitating every sun.
I love you, mom, farewell. I am done

-Verse-
chilling with depression hoping for God's presence
honestly I'm just looking for a blessing aye live a little was your catch phase the effective pun you'd say applying that with peer pressure when Dale and I were kids spring break vacation seems to be the only time Dale and I were friends it's always been a tag team you and him why'd you bully me as a kid don't explain it Angie your actions made sense since recently claiming I'm just a product of your rapist I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for grandpa's religious aspects and I only mean that in the pretense it's an upsetting revolution realizing my existence revolved around family hatred

-Chorus-
I cannot change how people are,
I have always seen you, like a shooting star.
Offering light to my night sky from a far
my love's heavy gravitating every sun.
I love you, mom, farewell. I am done

-Outro-
You may not care about me, but at one point, I cared about you. I don't want your acknowledgment. I don't want your presents. This chapter was written for me

Shooting Star

Yeah, it's all my dirty grinding' niggas, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh
This is for the underground, this is for the hardcore, this is for the thug, thug, thug
this is for the shooters, this is for the killers, this is for the thrillers, bam

I wake up in the morning drunk and belligerent, an asshole, real inconsiderate, I grew up in a foster home with no dad, piece of studio was all I had, "that's all I got" Ima get rich or die trying for fifty cent I sling the iron
In middle school I was selling that crack, you try to run, get shot in the back, my cousin
Cory, he finna blow, "ah huh" I got the white like it's finna snow, no talking I just cocked an aimed and you pump brakes like the light for the chain, weirdo, nigga fuck your hero, I bring the heat like Robin Dinero
I'm getting higher at the coffee shop, and if you don't talk shit, nigga course he popped

This is for the underground, this is for the hardcore, this is for the thug, thug, thug
this is for the shooters, this is for the killers, this is for the thrillers, bam

This is for the underground, this is for the hardcore, this is for the thug, thug, thug
this is for the shooters, this is for the killers, this is for the thrillers, bam

I write to peacefully protest, displaying resilience, so I can take the next steps in
extending my consciousness, don't worry about it just sitting here, feeding the wrong content to adolescents
Only self-destructive in one of the best ways, I'm the main reason your mom went gay
Tired of pretty bitches with minor mishaps, crafting excuses swiftly, innervating thoughts
that steal my hoodies or beanie hats, prioritizing my best self-interest, keeping those I love
care about me within a far distance, like an earthquake rippling the earth's surface

sorry I must have hurt you, knowing the scars serve me a greater purpose, contracting HIV
sharing my blood with humanity, that will be the day that I break bread with my enemies
This is for the underground, this is for the hardcore, this is for the thug, thug, thug
this is for the shooters, this is for the killers, this is for the drillers, bang

this is for the underground, this is for the hardcore, this is for the thug, thug, thug
this is for the shooters, this is for the killers, this is for the drillers, bang, down my dick
Yes, he's attacking the collar
He's attacking the collar now

Somebody give him a..
He's attacking the collar on the public
No, I can't. I'm not a..
I'm not a..

I'm not a..
Do you need a squad

Belligerent

Be11igerent

Intro-
You will find out
"Please,"
among other things
"Help me,"
what was it like to wake up 
after never having gone to sleep
"Please"
You see, you can't have experience at nothing.
"help me"
so after you're dead the only thing that can happen is the same experience 
or the same sort of experience as when you were born.
But why?

Verse-
cause, I'm just an optimistic suicidal mental health activist 
observant like these anti-drug feens exhibiting with no kicks broke as shit
receiving fixes inside a handicap stall 
sniffing pink pixie sticks off Tim's dick. 

"but I'm not a closet fag mkay" 

It seems like every fucking peeping Tom dick n hairy's part of the spectrum now of days 
believe it or not its one of the only ways moms can be praised for not terminating the pregnancy 
at a later date yo korcid that's fictitious like the firmament's about to break 
so stop slapping knees laughing hysterically lacking morals and the fundamentals 
to rationalize a lick of common sense memorizing the gospel of John 
only to preach it in the fucking loonie bin

"Please Help Me"

Outro-
Stewart Little? 
gasp Nigro please that little rat has nothing on me
 and if I work hard I could be the greatest rapper there ever was? 
rapper? hell nah you stink 
ah well screw you guys I'm going home

Please Help Me

I am Korcid — The Constructions of the Human Condition.
I’ve bled, I’ve broken, I’ve drowned in addiction, and I’ve risen again.
A bullet couldn’t stop me. A bottle couldn’t silence me.
I built music out of nothing but pain and a cheap phone,
and I turned it into proof that survival is art.

I don’t make songs for fame. I make them for therapy — mine and yours.
Every verse is a mirror, every beat is a heartbeat that says:
you’re not too far gone.

I am a symbol of hope.
I am living evidence that no matter how deep the darkness,
you can still carve light out of it.
My mission is simple: inspire the addict, empower the broken,
and remind the world that scars can sing.

Korcid

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