Two sausages and chips, twice.

Three separate recordings 
1 - Incompetent 
2 - Angel (44 seconds in)
3 - Sarcasm (1 minute 42)
Piano - Keyscape, Keyboard - M Audio Oxygen Pro 61
Book - Collins New World Thesaurus 1981 edition

11pm 5th December 2022
My second attempt at playing a piano keyboard with an opened book
This time with the keyboard sustain pedal on.

Incompetence - Angel  - Sarcasm

December 14th 2022 - New track.
Guitar - Fender Koa Telecaster
Played with an E Bow
Effect pedal - Digitech Whammy DT
Bass is the Telecaster tuned down by the Whammy pedal.

The Moon and a River

Words by Deeply Dazzled
Spoken by Artificial intelligence (text to audio free app)
Guitars - Yamaha SG2000. Tanglewood acoustic
Bass - Encore blaster
Keyscape and Omnisphere
Drums  - EZDrummer 
Image by Deeply Dazzled

Words by Deeply dazzled spoken by Artificial Intelligence App

jazz isn't smoke it's just a mystery

jazz isn't a mystery it just sticks to your feet
one foot at a time 
in 12 8



( Deep breath)
mystery jazz mystery jazz mystery jazz
mystery mystery jazz mystery mystery jazz jazz











I am not a robot
but i may as well be
 it would be 
much simpler
not like jazz at all

i can't see the jazz for the mystery
the mystery jazz smoke

I can see clearly now the jazz has gone

I can see clearly now the jazz has gone

moo ahh
moo
ahhhh

moo ahh moo ahh moo jazz

mystery
Jazz moo
moo ahh
ahhh 
jazz
mystery
mystery moo ahhh
jazz mystery moo ahhh

I can see clearly now the jazz has gone

(Respect to Jazz, Frank Zappa, Artificial intelligence, Amstel lager and Storm Ciaran)

I can see clearly now the jazz has gone

Keyboards - Omnisphere and Keyscape
Bass guitar - Encore Blaster
Drums - EZ Drummer

I've covered some parts of Frank Zappa tunes in the past, usually bass lines or chord sequences but this is the first time I've tried to cover a Zappa tune.
Black Napkins is basically two chords (C Sharp Minor 7 and D Major 7) repeated through the whole tune.
There's a melody and then solo's in between.
This is the format that i tried to replicate, 2 chords one melody and solo's.
There's no way i could replicate the solo's. Watch Stefano Bertolino on YouTube for a great replication of the Zoot Allures version.
I went for a much slower version, even slower than the 1988 live version on "Make a jazz noise here". I even deliberately played fewer notes in my solo's.
These days, beer and old age tend to lean me to the slower way of doing things.

Black Napkins (Frank Zappa cover)

A sad day today, (20th January 2024) my old windows XP computer was pronounced deceased, it is no more, all my Ableton 7 projects have gone to meet the maker in the sky.
And the donkeys did wail.
This was the first computer i used for Sound Cloud tracks so i have lost all of the Ableton 7 projects files for all the tracks on my first Deeply Dazzled page, everything from 2011 to 2015.
And the donkeys did wail.
And most of the tracks from the Deeply Dazzled Donkey page too.
Fuh! Kin! El!
And the excited train guy did wail.
The finished tracks are archived on Sound Cloud so all is not lost.
I never made a back up copy of all the Ableton projects and i will miss all the information that they contained.
And the dormice did wail.
I suppose, as you get older you're going to lose some things.
Car keys, Hair, playing football ,fights.
All the Donkeys, Dormice, Bukowski, Zappa, Bowie and The Excited Train Guy, gather under the light of the giant mushroom and they did wail.
Thanks for all the genuine plays and comments back then.
and thanks for all the genuine plays and comments now.

THE WINDOWS XP COMPUTER MEMORIAL WAIL

Music by Hans Zimmer
"Time" from the 2010 movie - "Inception"

Guitar - Gretsch Streamliner
Bass - Trilian
Drums - Superior Drummer
Piano - Keyscape
Synths - Omnisphere
Mood - Laid back Jazz
Beer - Brewdog Black Heart Stout

I heard this tune a couple of weeks ago on Sky Arts TV, "Hans Zimmer live in Prague" 2017.
A simple two note chord sequence in two parts 4 chords in each part and only the second chord changes - 
AC - EG - GB - D F# 
AC - CB - GB - D F# 
It sounded simple so i thought i would try and figure it out.
I asked the local druids but they don't know nothing, 
So i jammed to the tune, on the Gretsch guitar and came up with 
A - E - G - D
A - C - G - D
after that i went on YouTube and figured out the other notes.
One beer lead to another and the rest is a mystery.

2 months ago, 22nd Feb 2024, i bought another guitar, a secondhand Gretsch Streamliner G2655T with licensed Bigsby Whammy Bar.
I have played it a lot and also re-tuned it a lot too, the Bigsby sends the strings out of tune even if i just think about touching the whammy bar.
The worst string is the G followed by the D and then the A string.
When i wobble the Bigsby, one or two of these strings go sharp while another string goes a bit flat, and when i wobble the Bigsby again these 3 strings go a bit flat or sharp in a crazy analogue way.
This guitar is so un digital, i think that's why i have stuck with it, despite all it's faults.
It plays lovely, the neck is nice and wide and it sounds good, even up past the twelfth fret, but the tuning issues and the vibrating screws in the bridge are quite distracting. 
Did i tell you about the buzzing sound by the bridge? 
That's a story for next time.


Thank you 
for reading 
this far down.

Time (Hans Zimmer- theme from the movie - Inception )

This track was played on my new secondhand Gretsch Streamliner, the one with the licensed Bigsby tuning issues and the rattling tun-o-matic bridge. They sure do make them like they used to.
I wanted to do a backwards guitar track, so i played things that sounded good when the recording was played backwards.
I exported the finished backwards track and then copied and pasted the MP3 back onto an Ableton audio track and reversed it so the backwards track then played forwards, and it sounded pretty good so i stuck the two tracks together and hey presto, bing bang bong and Bobs your uncle
First the forwards track followed seamlessly by the backwards track.

Image - The Gretsch with blu tack stuck over the rattling screws in the bridge.

There and Back

Meanwhile
back in the Jazz Joint
the music is humming
and the donkeys are bubbling
time slows down
as the magical moments drift by
like a breeze over a woodland canopy
time slows down
in the Jazz joint
the walls have a sweat
that comes from the floor
and drips down from the ceiling
a ceiling that is rarely seen
sometimes a rainbow manifests
and drifts through the clouds of real tobacco smoke

Guitar - Eastwood Astroluxe Cadet
No Bass

Meanwhile
Back in the Jazz joint
Inca Roads by Frank Zappa is playing
and there is an occasional off note
that makes the mirrors vibrate
almost all the way
and then mirrors relax
This happens more than once
and people move away from the mirrors
Ash trays are full
No one here has ever heard "Sweet Caroline"

Drums - Superior Drummer - Jazz Sessions
Other drums - Stylus RMX

Meanwhile
back in the Jazz Joint
No one is listening
Except the donkeys
and they have the ears for it
they stand still
very still
and they listen
The others are looking at themselves
heads down and hoods up
and as the mirrors vibrate to Inca Roads
they feel nothing.

Vibes - Keyscape
Image - "Just below the ceiling" -chalk on blackboard photographed with a digital camera

Meanwhile
back in the Jazz Joint
The lights are dimming
the smoke is clearing
and there sits
Deeply Dazzled 3
surrounded
dreaming
drinking Camden Stout
Thanking his lucky stars.

Astroluxe Cadet played into -
Line 6 POD (the first one)
on settings Tube amp plus Compressor
into a Lexicon MPX550 Verb chorus

meanwhile
back in the Jazz joint
Donkeys ears are twitching

Meanwhile...........back in the Jazz Joint

Draw several strands together and create a new thing
Voice - David Bowie, from the Charlie Rose interview
Music by Deeply Dazzled
Synth / Strings - Omnisphere
Piano - Keyscape
Guitar - Koa Telecaster thru TH3
Bass - Trilian
Drums - EZDrummer
Image - Deeply Dazzled, marker pens on a blackboard, adjusted with PaInt.net

Draw several strands together

Words and Music by Deeply Dazzled
Image "The art in artificial" by Deeply Dazzled, white marker pen on a black board, photographed and the image adjusted with paint.net

Acoustic guitar - Guild Gad30e
Electric guitar - Fender Deluxe Strat into Th3 and Freqout (feedback) pedal
Bass - Omnisphere - Double bass
Synth - Omnisphere - Sinus harmonious
Vibes - Keyscape - MKS20 - vibes
Harmonica - Fender Blues Deluxe in D
Thanks to Naproxen for arthritic swollen finger joint reduction.

Spoken by "Lorraine" text to speech app
I HAVE A THEORY
DO YOU WANT TO HEAR MY THEORY?
I HAVE A THEORY
DO YOU WANT TO HEAR MY THEORY?

MY THEORY
IS BASED ON LOGIC
MOULDED BY EXPERIENCE
IT HAS BITS OF THIS
AND BITS OF THAT
AND HAS ONE THING AND ANOTHER

MY THEORY
IS BASED ON LOGIC
MOULDED BY EXPERIENCE
IT HAS BITS OF THIS
AND BITS OF THAT
AND HAS ONE THING AND ANOTHER

EQUUS ASINUS
DONKEY IMMACULATE
DONKEY MINIMUM
JAZZICUS OPTIMUM
JAZZICUS OPTIMUS
JAZZ DON'T LIE
IT JUST SMELLS LIKE THE TRUTH
THE TRUTH IN CODE
SEMAPHORIC
ALGABRAIC
MATHEMATICUS
MATHEMATICAL
PROBLEMATICUS
CONFUCIUS
FEEDBACKICATIOUS

I HAVE A THEORY
DO YOU WANT TO HEAR MY THEORY?
I HAVE A THEORY
DO YOU WANT TO HEAR MY THEORY?
NO I DON'T

Release date:
4 September 2024

Do you want to hear my theory?

I'm remembering. The pub is packed.
There is the sweet smell of tobacco smoke, everywhere.
The Druid walks in
he sees me and comes over.
I'm standing just away from the bar
up between the wall and the slot machine.
He pays me back the two quid he owes me
and i get the beers in.
We're in rounds, lager, pints, easy to remember.
Druid says "Lets have a chat before the women arrive"
I say "What do you know about toadstool and mushroom magic?"
Druid "What do you want to know?"
I say " I heard that when a frog sits on a mushrooms the sky turns blue and when a toad sits on a toadstool the sky turns grey"
Druid "Who the fuck told you that?"
I said "Well i was talking with Jim Chimney the other day"
Druid "Jim Chimney?"
I said "Yeah, you know, the chimney sweep"
Druid "You mean Jimmy Chimney"
I said "No, that's his father, he's the one with the milk round, I mean his son Jim Chimney, the chimney sweep"
Druid "I know him, he's got that motorbike thing with three wheels and a basket on the front"
I said "That's him"
Someone taps the Druid on his shoulder,
"You got my two quid?"
"See me in Judo Wednesday"
I say "Anyway, Jim Chimney and me were talking last night and Dai Druid walks in".
Druid says "What? Dai fucking Druid?
"Yeah"
Druid "Fucking hell, I haven't seen him since he was arrested"
I say "You saw him getting arrested"
"No i saw him a couple of days before that"
Anyway Jim said " Dai Druids out now and he was telling me about this toadstool magic shit that he heard of in jail"
"Jailhouse Toadstool magic? is that like magic mushrooms shit or what?"
Jim "I don't know, he just said he heard it in jail"
The Druid comes back from the toilet.
"What you been talking about"
We tell him.
Druid says "Toadstool magic and magic Mushrooms are the same thing"
I say "another round?"
Druid "yeah"
I say "Jim Chimney said Dai Druid told him about the magic"
"The magic?"
"Yes, The different magic that there is between Mushrooms and Toadstools"
Druid "Why is there a difference ..?"
"There is no WHY"
"What?" I say.
"There is no WHY, there is only WHO WHAT WHEN WHERE and HOW, there is no WHY"
"Why isn't there a WHY?" I say.
Druid "That's not the question you should be asking."
"OK then, WHAT's the difference between the magic mushroom and the secret toadstool?"
I have his attention.
I say " Jim Chimney told me that he's seen frogs and toads sitting on mushrooms and toadstools and nothing happened"
Druid "Now THAT is an interesting question"
Then the women arrive.
and eventually
on Sunday morning
We are all enlightened.

Drums - none
Guitar - Yamaha SG200s played with an EBOW
Background drone - Omnisphere - Analog shapeshifting pad
Intro synth - Omnisphere - Analog melodrama
Outro Piano - Keyscape - Double felt grand - cinematic
Image by DD3 - chalk on blackboard 
Beer - as always

The secret of toadstool magic

My second attempt at resurrecting the files on the two damaged Windows XP hard drives has been a failure, apparently one of the drives doesn't even spin round, whatever that means.
Anyway, it was a no fix no fee job so fair enough.
My last hope is a 2012 BKF back up file 220GB and i haven't a clue how to open it. 
Maybe i need a working Windows XP computer.
The helpful internet is undecided, 
it's either impossible or really easy.
In the meantime this donkey magic invocation might help my cause.
And if everyone joins in with the invocational singalong ending to this track, 
then many things, all over the world, might be fixed. 
I met another local Druid in the Supermarket just before Christmas
and he recommended an invocation that had sopranos and Tovan throat singing in it. 
I wasn't going to argue and he was right about the rabbit droppings and frog spawn mixture that got my lawn mower started again.

to be continued ..............................

All music using Spectrasonics software and a M-Audio Oxygen Pro 61 keyboard.
Omnisphere, Trilian, Stylus RMX
plus some backwards cymbals
Recorded  - Christmas time 2024
Uploaded - New Years day 2025

THE WINDOWS XP RESURRECTION INCANTATION

when your blue sky turns to grey
and the wind blows your dreams away
never mind
things will work out
the wind will change
there's no doubt

just remember
to thank your lucky stars
up there shining
your lucky stars

when your grey sky turns to blue
and the sun shines down on you
that's OK
it's just another day

say hello
to your lucky stars
just remember
to thank your lucky stars

are you lucky?
are you unlucky?
either way
you are always right
heads or tails?
you decide
before the coin falls
you decide
are you lucky?
are you unlucky?
as the coins spin 
thank your lucky stars
before the coins falls
thank your lucky stars
and you might just be surprised
as the coins spin
before the coins fall
you decide
heads or tails?
you decide
you decide
are you lucky?
you decide

Music written on keyboard
three fingers chord on CDE - FGA - BCD
Guitar - C - F - G
Words by Deeply Dazzled
Sung by Deeply Dazzled
Spoken by Loraine' the Text to Speech App
Bass and Vibes and Synths - Omnisphere
Drums and Percussion - Stylus RMX and Superior Drummer
Image - "Catch a lucky star" - Deeply Dazzled - Marker pen on blackboard thru Paint.net
Harmonica solo thanks to Wine, Beer and positive thinking.

Lucky Stars

Guitar - Fender Stratocaster Deluxe (FEN)
through TH3
Drums - Superior Drummer - Twisted kit and Electronic kit panned left and right
Bass - Omnisphere
plus Keyscape and the "horn" audio sample from the Excited train guy.
Image - "edges" by Deeply Dazzled - chalk on blackboard 2025
Recent  music studio upgrades - 12 Watt light bulb replaced with 13.5 Watt light bulb, new blinds on the window and a repaired guitar that had a new pick up wired in the wrong way, I now have the Peter Green tone.
I also purchased Genome amp sim software.

The Horn of Legend

Words and music and image by DeeplyDazzled 
June 16th and 18th 2025
Voice - text to speech app
Music - Omnisphere, Keyscape
Drums - Stylus RMX

I don't often get Apocalyptic
but it does happen sometimes.
All these drones and missiles on the news.
and the thing is, i was in such a good mood when i sat at the keyboard to write something.

BLINDING LIGHT.
HEAVENS ABOVE.
THE SUN AND THE MOON.
ARE WITH US TONIGHT.

HEAVENS ABOVE.
THE SUN AND THE MOON.
THE STARS SHINE SO BRIGHT.
AND THE SKY IS FALLING DOWN.
THE SKY IS FALLING DOWN.

DAWN IS COMING.
SLOW AND STEADY.
WAKE UP YOU SLEEPY HEADS.
YOU'D BETTER GET READY.

THE BIRDS ARE SILENT
THERE ARE NO BIRDS.
THE TREES ARE EMPTY.
WHEN THE SKY FALLS DOWN.

AND WHEN IT'S ALL OVER.
AND COLD FOLLOWS HEAT.
YOU MIGHT BE WALKING.
WITH THE SKY AT YOUR FEET.

DON'T FORGET TO GRAB YOUR PHONE.
DELETE EVERYTHING.
DELETE EVERYTHING.
DELETE EVERYTHING.
DELETE EVERYTHING.
DELETE EVERYTHING.

DELETE EVERYTHING

After the Apocalypse
everything was
eventually
quite good again.
things came back, like they always do
and the Apocalypse faded away.
Centuries later, somebody invented beer
and then everything started going down hill again.

A Minor
D Minor

Guitar - Fender Koa Telecaster with new strings, Fender super 250 9 - 42
Guitar - Airline Twin Tone also with new strings, D'Addario 10 - 46
Amp software - Genome, Th3
Omnisphere, Keyscape, Trilian and EZ Drummer
14 tracks
Image by Deeply Dazzled, 10pm July 4th 2025,
chalk on blackboard, photographed with an SLR camera
and messed about with using Paint.net.
Beer (Amstel, Brewdog cold beer and Budweiser)
purchased with this weeks winnings from
premium bonds, euro millions and the postcode lotttery.
Total winnings - £33.
Yes! I did thank my lucky stars.

DEEPLY DAZZLED 3

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