Prior to working with Dr. Stracks, he didn't recognize the fact that he was a worried, anxious, stressed-out person.  When Dr. Stracks said, “You may need to take it easy on yourself," he thought he meant physically.  With a great house, family, an active life, Mike thought he had the game beat.  Now it’s obvious him he was anxious his whole life. 
He has no desire to blame his parents, they were acting out of their pain, while it’s difficult to discuss, his father (who had a really hard childhood) had a bad temper.  Mike feels that by sharing his story he's releasing his dad of his burden.  There is no blame.  This is not physical violence or sexual abuse but simple benign everyday trauma. 
Thinking about how trauma forms us and gets passed down through the generations, he now sees the triggers and behaviors related to emotional repression.  Through the simple act of talking about it, the pain releases.  
Whereas he used to become angry and withdrawn at times, now he can feel it happening early and take some deep breaths and shift those patterns and the subsequent pain. 
He says acceptance is not giving up but to  “consent to the world as it exists… align with the reality of the world”  Things are cyclical, if this is a difficult moment this moment will pass.  He proclaims "It’s amazing how much better it is to live this way!" 
When asked about the role of western medicine in his and his family's life now, he talks about encouraging his daughter to treat some recent pain with meditation and tracking her emotions. He often ponders when/whether to see a doctor.  He thinks he’ll know when the time is right. For now, he embraces the mind-body connection and wellness based on that – and he still gets a physical every year. 
He acknowledges that four years ago, he couldn’t have spoken like this.  His journey has been a gift.  His purpose in life is to share it. We all have false beliefs of ourselves, when we remove the armor it's a much better way to live.

I'm Annette Leonard, speaker, coach, and sick person who believes that my illnesses do not define me. If health is the absence of disease and wellness is the presence of wholeness, then no matter what your disease status, we can work toward your wellness, your wholeness. 

Whether or not you are ever "healthy" on paper, you can be well. Join me and others on the path back to wholeness at AnnetteLeonard.com. Whether you are a person experiencing chronic illness or are someone who loves or serves people with chronic illness I have great resources here on this channel or on my website for you. 

WIN A COPY OF MIKE'S BOOK Here's how to enter: 
1) Leave me a rating or review on whatever audio podcast platform you listen to. 
2) Let me know you've done that by emailing me at hello@annetteleonard.com or leaving me a comment about it on YouTube so that you can be entered in to the drawing. If you have a preference about which book you'd like, let me know in your comment or email. (I’m also giving away a copy of Arlene Faulk's "Walking on Pins and Needles.") 
3) If you'd like to be entered multiple times you can also post about one (or both of the books) and tag me on Instagram @theAnnetteLeonard including tag of either #mypainbodysolution or @arlenefaulk for up to two additional entries. The drawing is planned for Mike's book is on 7/5 (Arlene's will be on 6/30).

Episode 358: Mike Murray Part 3

Your health journey is all your own.  I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard

Several things made me think about this topic.  I recently was talking about my friend Amy.  She died almost exactly a year before I got my diagnosis of Pulmonary Fibrosis.  She was waiting for her lung transplant and when she passed she was a frail shadow of herself.  Also, my mom died with complications of several of the autoimmune diseases that I have.  

It's so easy -- especially when we have a difficult or unfamiliar diagnosis, to lean on Dr Google, or other peoples' experiences and let those things coopt our imagination about our illness and I think that can have some disastrous and unintended consequences.  

The Google will tell you that my life expectancy is 3 - 5 years.  Well, here I am 9 years later.  While many things COULD have led to my demise -- but tuning that out and walking my own path has been crucial.  As a reforming people pleaser, as someone who values information, it's easy to be captivated by the stories people share about anyone they know who may have had something similar to what I have, how that's gone, what's worked, what remedies they've tried.

Sometimes, hearing those stories can contribute to the sense that I'm doing it wrong, or add to the sense that "this is going poorly and I've already made the wrong decisions."

Having done this for a while and having learned how to BE EMBODIED in this experienced: doing body scans, checking in with my thoughts and feelings, knowing when something's changed.  I'm the best person to asses what's going well and when it's time to make a change.  No, it isn't fun, it takes a lot of effort to tune in like that, to advocate for myself, to coordinate with my docs and insurance companies, but it's the only way to take control of my health.

When I start thinking "well, she said that by this time next year things got really bad..." then I'm initiating a slew of chemicals that will lead to anxiety, fear, pain, or being addicted to my own catastrophes.  Perhaps those things will happen, but perhaps they won't.  But, the only guarantee is that I've robbed myself of this present moment.

The idea of suffering is terrifying.  I'm not trying to pretend it isn't.  There is fear and anguish.  But there are tools.  Whether it starts with a contemplative practice, journaling, or noticing what's happening to find a skilled therapist.  There are ways to keep my fear of the future from enjoying the present.  This journey is YOURS ALONE, from the small to the large.  But no amount of today is improved by me fixating on how bad it's going to get.

Notice when you get hooked, when you start to borrow trouble.  If you don't have tools, skills, or support about making change in that area, it might be time to get some.

Let us know how you're making your journey your own.

This is the Chronic Wellness Podcast.  I'm Annette Leonard, speaker, coach, and sick person who believes that my illnesses do not define me. If health is the absence of disease and wellness is the presence of wholeness, then no matter what your disease status, we can work toward your wellness, your wholeness. 
 
Whether or not you are ever "healthy" on paper, you can be well. Join me and others on the path back to wholeness at AnnetteLeonard.com. Whether you are a person experiencing chronic illness or are someone who loves or serves people with chronic illness I have great resources here on this channel or on my website for you.

Episode 405: Your Health Journey Is All Your Own

Are you one of the millions living with a chronic illness or pain?  Our diseases may be very different, but we have many of the same experiences, obstacles and frustrations.   We are all working for a better quality of life knowing that pain and limitations will be our traveling companions.  My name is Annette and I'm the host of Chronic Wellness, a brief, weekly, podcast where we talk about it all: sex, self-care, mental heath, loss of identity, anger, how to navigate health care and have less days that suck so hard.

I have this belief that: If health is the absence of disease, and wellness is the presence of wholeness;  whether or not I'm ever "healthy" again, I can work work toward my wellness, my wholeness.  

Curious?  Join me where you listen to Podcasts, for a few moments of Chronic Wellness.

Episode 358: Mike Murray Part 3

Chronic Wellness

Related tracks