nihilistic

Bad Vibes Forever

bad vibes forever (feat. PnB Rock & Trippie Redd)

BOO! (INTERLUDE)

man the truth is i ain’t used to how i’m tryna feel
nuance is a nuisance 
it’s a bruise that i be tryna heal
it’s the noose that i keep tying still
if i let it, it would fester 
and remove me from my higher self

in my youth i wasn’t stupid i was high as hell
everything i knew, what i’d been through
had helped me find what’s real
the thrills that i abused weren’t just my muse
they were my clientele
thru the pills i tried and failed
water moving through the well 

so is it better that it never worked?
if my efforts to reset had put me in the dirt
if my demons never creeped in would i go to church 
levels learned, heaven hurts
soon i’ll get what i deserve

my fear is what i’m near
all these years spent on the search 
every other weekend is a season or another curse

when what i’m seeking 
seems to re-emerge 
i can’t seem to see it 
for a reason that i’ve yet to learn

like all those secrets that i haven’t heard

give me reasons 
give me peace in which i never earned

i can’t keep it if it leaves then i just let it burn

i can’t see what i can’t reach 
what i can’t ever hurt

so if i tell you the truth 
would you hear it 
through those lies that i keep telling to you 
would you see me 
through those eyes that you put weapons into
it’s a portion of my pride 
that been expecting your view

and i think therefore i am 
i’m no better than no man 
still i settle where i land
smell of petrol on my hands
sedatives keep settling in 
built my temple up in the sand 
now i can never win

i think you get the gist
i think too much 
about the stuff that i could never fix 
for what it was 
whatever wasn’t was a reckoning 
i had to love to live 
just a degenerate 
i learned that everything i’d done 
was never genuine 

that’s a lesson that i kept 
and i accepted i could never run
that’s a severance on my tongue
that’s transgression that i trust

, a pleasure that stung
if pain could show it’s face 
it’d look like everything i love


prod. Isaiah Kaleo

truth

okay the distance between us 
lies in-between a thesis
i think our differences meet 
when one of us stops believing 
i’ve walked around with lesions 
wondering what’s got me bleeding
talking on and off with all my demons
showed me all my secrets
recently it seems to me
my reason be where all the leaves went
calling on the cold to bring the heat
had only left me freezing
keep me, if you need me 
in your heart, if mine were not to beat then
in the deepest parts of all my art 
you could connect the pieces


so if it’s gone you never had it all along right?
i’m in that zone where i’m attached to what i know

leave me lone i’m entrapped inside my own mind
i been known to bring my habits through the door

so if i let it go, it come back and it’s mad at me
i’m not the one to leave my mattress on the floor

if all i’m shown in actuality’s a tragedy
i’ll bring the traffic to the road 


i mean, it’s all a shift in perspective 
if i’m the head on top my chest 
then how’d i get this necklace
when did i get so reckless 
i slipped from my acceptance
i keep a list of my regrets 
i been neglecting
if time is the weapon of death
i’m out of seconds 
realizing i’m not at my best
i been projecting
regardless, if i sent it
& i meant it, then you’ll get the message
partially a target
part of me can’t ever stand corrected


if it’s gone you never had it all along right?
i’m in that zone where i’m attached to what i know

leave me lone i’m entrapped inside my own mind
i been known to bring my habits through the door

if i let it go, it come back and it’s mad at me
i’m not the one to leave my mattress on the floor

if all i’m shown in actuality’s a tragedy
i’ll bring the traffic to the road

traffic

so i’ll still be here when the day comes
when everything we know escapes us
i’ll still be here when you’re walking away
& you’re looking for somebody safer
i’ll still be here when it rains
when all of your tears puddle up on my grave
for all of those years that we spent in the shade
i’ll still be here with the sun on my face

falling in place, 
we were running from something 
we don’t know the name of

i’m calling it shame,
i’m calling my angels
i’m far from a saint

but i’m not ashamed of the place 
that i came from
even though i’m not one of the greats
at least i can say i’m the same one
if you had it your way tell me 
what would you change

in a life where the light of the day
and the night in a fight
i know i’m not for shade much

but i’ll still be here for those gray months
i mean i’ll still be here—
cause i’m stuck in these chains
my only fear is my fear, i’m afraid


i’m only safe in this ink on the page
my life gets so dangerous
i live in a plight and my mind’s in a maze
so leave me to think, but don’t lead me astray
sinking my teeth in the sheath of my blade 
i gnaw at the calm just to feel something break
i only wait when i’m wasting away
i only taste what gets stuck in my fangs
a man in the hands that forgave
i don’t think i’m zane 
but i’ll still be here when my fate comes.


prod. isaiah kaleo

ruin

tell me why you shaking what you tripping for
i been in that place where it got difficult
no i’m not the man that you had known before
i’ll get you anything that you need
we could go anywhere that you like
okay i’m throwed

i’m in that mode again
doubled up my budget me & my brothers going in
double cup of somethin got my stomach bubblin
tell it how it is you don’t gotta pretend

like, you don’t even gotta be fake
i remember them days it was hard to be real
like, i didn’t mean to call you crazy
i was just off of the pills
i can’t hop on facetime baby i’m in the field
when it become daytime we could chill

tell me why you shaking what you tripping for
i been in that place where it got difficult
no i’m not the man that you had known before 
but i’m still everything that you need
yea i’m still everything that you like

i been up to something 
if you really wondering
the crib look like a function 
all these drugs keep coming in
couple hundred duffels in the cupboard, i’m a lick
call log full of custys, you look like the government

you don’t gotta hit my phone no more
just know i’m doing great
all these bitches i ain’t know before 
just wanna give me face
ima pull up in my summer clothes
like bitch let’s have a race
you could do anything that you think
anything that you like

tell my why you shaking what you tripping for
i been in that place where it got difficult
eyes sitting low seeing visuals
i could do anything that i think
anything that i like

nihilistic

OTS bj

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