fuck the people who said that they'd always stay and ended up leaving. I can't keep trusting people anymore. they always end up hurting me. I don't know what I expected from people who lie and manipulate and for some reason, no matter how hard I try, I still care about them. I still miss them. I still want to hear their voice. I still want to feel their arms around mine. I still want to hear them tell me everything will be okay. I still want to hear their laugh. I still want to be able to tell them that ill always care about them. and deep down I know that I still love them. and I really, really wish everything would stop making me think about them. I really wish I could stop missing them. I really wish I could stop flinching everytime I hear their name come up w my friends. I really wish they would make things easier for me. but no matter what I do I can't make them come back. and it kills me every damn day. bc I can't say I hate them. bc I don't and I could never hate them. I really wish I could stop crying every night about them. I really wish I could stop listening to the same heartbreak songs that make me think about them. I really wish I could just forget about them. so I could finally sleep good at night. I really wish people would just make their name disappear from my brain so I could finally be okay. bc no matter what I tell myself, I'll never be okay w them gone. I wish the smallest of things could stop making me think about them. like that stupid song they would always sing. like that stupid game we would play together. like the color green. like the restuarant they would always go to. like Mexico bc they had family over there. they make me hate music even though I love it soo much. like I can't even look at my bestfriend the same bc she and HE reminds me of them. like even being in my own room reminds me of them and it makes me wanna break my walls and throw everything on the floor and break everything I love in my room. I started not liking the color pink bc it reminded me of them. and I can't even look in my memories on snapchat bc ik they'll be there. I hate KitKat now bc they loved them. I want shave my head bc they liked my hair. I can't walk the hallways of my school anymore without wanting to cry bc of all the memories w them. I want to be high constantly bc I'm so tired of trying to be strong without them. I really gave them my all and after everything they're gone. they just left me there. Broken. with nothing. not even an explanation. like a coward. like a fool I believed that they could actually keep a promise. and I highly and deeply regret it. I regret forgiving them. I regret even reuniting w them after 2 years. bc in the end, they hurt me. broke me even. broke my heart when it wasn't whole to begin with. I hate that I tried. I can't believe I fell in love with them and let them treat me like shit. 

insta: @audrey_maldonado_07 

Audrey_Maldonado_07