Why am I so sad?

WITHOUT YOU - SPOOKY BLACK

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xtcvwHXJipg

opposite ends of the room, love is there but there's a distance i can't undo.
i built it all up in my head, felt the same but somehow differently or unsaid.

a fire so red could last until we're both dead, but i've been burned before, it's a cliche but my scars are still sore.

i want to take back everything i told you and remember all the times i would hold you. maybe you don't know who i am, maybe i was scared and ran. 
goodbye is hard to do, especially without "i love you."

opposite ends of the state, happiness once was enough to know what i pushed away. but that is SO fucking cheap. you deserve better than that, you deserve better than me.


i want to take back everything i told you and remember all the times i would hold you. maybe you don't know who i am, maybe i was scared and ran. 
goodbyes are hard to do, especially without "i love you."

opposites *NOW ON SPOTIFY<3* (video link in description)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DzXEM2beb8g

You can ask me how I'm doing, I'll say fine.
Even though the pain is killing me inside.
You can Ask me how I'm feeling, I'm alright.
You want the truth then you can look me in the eyes.

You can ask me how I've been I'll say okay,
I never gave a fuck about my feelings anyways
You can ask me hows its been I'll say, it's great
I never wanted your sympathy in the first place.

And I know I really mean that in the worst way.
I'd share my side by I don't think you'd ever see it.
I turn my back on everybody even me.
I'd say I'm sorry but I don't know what It'd would mean.

Black Nails, Black Sheep
I was never meant to be
I'm in the dark, but I can see.
This world was never meant for me
 
Should I stay or should I go,
I've been walkin down this road.
As of lately I've been homesick 
but I'm still so sick of home.  

I'm feelin just like a ghost 
I'm nobody, I'm alone
Got no body, Just a soul
My backs been been on these ropes.

My hearts been getting cold.
My skins been getting numb
My minds been getting dull
I see what I've become.

Black Nails, Black Sheep, 
I was never meant to be
I'm in the dark, but I can see
This world was never meant for me

Music Video

Black Sheep (Prod. ʎpoqou & combination lock) [Music Video in Description]

ALONE IN MY ROOM prod. TOTHEGOOD

https://soundcloud.com/tothegood

global emotional music



ALONE IN MY ROOM (PROD. TOTHEGOOD)

https://youtu.be/Ceg6ICwkEmM
s/o tha bro @astvri

I'm laying right beside you 
and still can't sleep
you know I'm fucking jealous
that you're leaving

I'm thinking bout your phone
and why it's beeping
you know I'm fucking scared
that you don't know me

I will pick you up
before you're bleeding now
I know you're blowing up
I'm proud believe me now

I wanna be the picture 
on your homescreen
I know we know the passwords
but don't check things

I guess I trust you
Is that a bad thing?
I don't wan hurt you
just go do your thing

I wanna be the picture 
on your homescreen
I know we know the passwords
but don't check things


I wanna be the picture on ur homescreen

https://soundcloud.com/lilxlotus
https://soundcloud.com/oilcolor

Poppy tears:

I can’t face
 that pain
that weight..

I don’t wana feel like that anymore
all black clothes ona all white corpse
I don’t wana breathe.. just suffocate me

yeh its poppy tears/lil sedative 
help me sleep I’ll take anything
and I float away

Lil Lotus: 

all I wana do is close my eyes with you 
take my time with you
suicide for two x 4

I close my eyes and then I drift away 
into the light I wont forget your face
I promise I… remember everything
about that night… when you just walked away

we left this conscious state x 2
into a better place x 2  


suffocate me w/ lil lotus (prod. oilcolor)

follow and support @nadiakuk

first vocal track released as 'cabe' so tell me what you think. there will be more next year...
other vocals and beats @kryptik_official

snapchat: kryptikbeats
instagram: yung_kryptik

lyrics:
it started with a sweet kiss . i guess you were my weakness...
somethings on your mind. tell me why
all the love was sweet bliss. red roses with the cheap tricks
somethings on your mind. tell me I'm the reason why
i never felt from the start, just numb
tell me I'm the fucking reason for this outcome...
all these feelings i can't outrun...

yeah.. 
i saw that you called...aye...
fuck that shit guess i'll miss them all... girl,
i thought you was the best of them all... but...
i was the dumbest one of them all... yeah...
fuck it pack another bowl... yeah...
all i have to do is make a call... aye
ring ring ring thats her on the phone... 
knock knock knock on the door now its on...

from the start (prod. nadiak)

don't go back [prod.93feetofsmoke]

no samples.
lyrics:
My face hits the ground
And thats just how it is
got rain checked on relationships
Cried like a bitch
Rode my bike home
In the 7th grade
Felt like a Monday
cuz when I got home
cried for 7 days
So don’t cry name
If I ever slip lips again
Ill just stay the same
We made love in my car
And wanna crash
But I can’t
Cuz someone else is calling me
SO TELL ME WHAT YOU FUCKIN THINKIN
WHEN MY EYES BLINK
DOES YOUR HEART SINK
WHEN YOU SEE MY TEARS FALL
I’M DROnWING IN A POOL OF FUCKIN BROKEN HEARTS

AND I KNOW WHAT THE FUCKIN YOU THINKIN
DONT LET YOUR BLOOD HIT THE SINK  
TOSS THAT METAL BLADE ON THE GROUND
DONT WANNA SEE YOUR SMILE TURN INTO A FROWN

Tired of sleeping in till 5 pm
Waking up I brush my teeth 
I’m breakin down again
I can’t fuckin eat
I can’t fuckin sleep
Thinking bout your face
 just wanna leave this place 
When I think of you I think of sorrow
Cuz all you fuckin want is my to heart borrow
pullin out the choppa hope I see you tomorrow

downcast!

https://open.spotify.com/artist/6NFHn7VH6jgV2nVWqW2bsa?si=4GL1fS_8Q7iRYjWf_FlXBw

https://soundcloud.com/ihearangelscry
https://soundcloud.com/kuroimetsuyu

℞ ♡ ✈︎ ℞ ♡ ✈︎ 

Im sleeping on the plane
just fuck me numb 
and take away the pain

is there something wrong 
or am I just coming down the way I do again x 2

I've got twelve bitter pills slowing down my breathing 
been in pain and I swear it ain't even
take my blade bby leave me bleeding
cut me open and find my secrets x 2

I've been sleeping on the plane 
bby fuck me numb and take away my pain x 2

poppy tears x angel tears - sleeping on a plane (kuroime)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G9kp7YNWkUw

prod. shrimp

mixed and mastered by shrimp

tanlines (video in description)

you're probably having the same conversations with your friends 
that i always have with mine 

about how i'm too hung up and how i need to just get over it 
but these kinds of wounds can only heal with time 

so let me know if ever there is anything that i can do 
to help you out or make you feel alright 

'cause i still think about you often, i still wonder how you're doing
i still fear that you'll let this world dim your light 

i'm sorry for it all

sorry

i've never felt less like myself 
than when i'm naked in reflections 
truly wish that i could exit this body 

and it's coming on again 
starting to crush again 
can't wait to fuck up every friendship that i've made 

but i've never felt more like myself 
than when i'm drunk alone 
at 3 a.m. again 

'cause my stupid brain can't help but get attached 
to every person whose attention 
even barely starts to drift a bit my way 

oh, here we go again 
here we go again

here we go again

cigarettes

no samples / with love, @4evrgone + 93 <3

I went dry
Fucking giving chances
Lord knows
Bloods old
On my fucking mattress
Hands cold
No hope in us ever lasting
Old souls
Still prone to infatuation

You'll hit me up
say what's up
Hope you're ok,
Ok
Gotta go about my damn day
Yeah Shits changed

Try to sleep
Really late at night
Guess it's morning
Toss & turning
Guess u hurt me

I guess you hurt me x3

hmu say wsup hope ur ok, ok w/ 4evr

no samples, w/ @4evrgone <3

i'm clenching teeth again..

i'm clenching teeth again, up all night
k don't think that we should speak again
u really did me in, I did it to myself
bad decisions got me feeling thin
fuck relations, If I was on this ship
out in the ocean I'd have died then
I'm clenching fears again, In fact they hold me too
so fucking tight these lights are caving in
I'm clenching fears again in fact they hold me too
so fucking tight these lights are caving in
u really did me in
u rlly did me in

scream my name, leave my body by the stairwell
take my own life in the ocean so there's no trail
travis bro I understand, god damnit farewell
sometimes my mind lets me rot in a jail cell

scream my name, leave my body by the stairwell
take my own life in the ocean so there's no trail
travis bro I understand, god damnit farewell
sometimes my mind lets me rot in a jail cell

scream my name, leave my body by the stairwell w/ 4evr

(NOW ON SPOTIFY!) ✯ lame girl ✯ - lameboysharp (prod. ATP)

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ＡＳ　ＴＨＥ　ＤＡＹＳ　ＲＯＬＬ　ＯＮ

//もういちど私を愛して//

this hasn't gotten any easier for either of us. if you're reading this, just know i will always love you. you'll forever hold my heart & i'm sorry it still beats for you.

lyrics
--------
so baby tell me that you love me
tell me anything instead of nothing
i just wanna hear you speak again
even if its just the air you're breathing in

i know that you wont ever want me
but a boy can hope i cope by smoking palm leaves
the ghost of what we had is floating in the smoke
i cry every night about you i'm a fucking joke

i'm a fucking joke
texting you at 2 wish you'd reply but you don't
what the fuck is going on i really do not know
said you loved me yesterday in a few days you'll say you don't

tell me that you love me

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FNUkja4DgZE
PROD. CHARLIE SHUFFLER

MIXED BY PRETTYHEARTBREAK

Drag You Through My Hell (prod. Charlie Shuffler) video in bio :)

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ＧＥＴ　Ａ　ＣＡＬＬ　ＢＡＣＫ

//誰も長く滞在しない//

i keep looking for love in all the wrong places. maybe one day things will be different.

lyrics
--------
and i know that you want me to leave
but it's cool cause we're through and i'm high in the trees
i escape with a vape cause the smoke stains my teeth
yes i know that i probably talk in my sleep
probably talk in my sleep when we kiss i awake
but i'm dreaming again it was all fuckin' fake
and i'm thinkin' too much of the way that you taste
cause the flavor of you isn't one to replace
and i think imma waste

more time scrollin' down my timeline
wish that i could hop up in my whip and go to five guys
somethings gotta give when i'm sky high
i'm not something super in the uber playin' i spy
disappear from everybody for a while
cause the air is getting thick within the radius of miles
suicide is on my mind & i can't bare to even smile
i can only get a taste cause happiness is versatile

and i know that you want me to leave
but it's cool cause we're through and i'm high in the trees
i escape with a vape cause the smoke stains my teeth
yes i know that i probably talk in my sleep
probably talk in my sleep when we kiss i awake
but i'm dreaming again it was all fuckin' fake
and i'm thinkin' too much of the way that you taste
cause the flavor of you isn't one to replace
and i think that i

probably could've tried harder
i tend to fall in love too quick with everybody's daughter
take my heart and they begin to slaughter
i'm a fuckin' wreck and my neck is lookin' like every other
boy that they've been bruisin' for a bit
i've been smooth cruisin' catalytic tendencies are in
love is just a four letter word that don't mean shit
cause i open up a bit too much & they just wanna dip

they just always fall back
i don't think i'll ever get a call back
why the fuck i go through all that
just for what we had to fuckin' fall flat

Why am I so sad?

Broken