A song about being a student nurse at the University of Brighton. Lyrics below.

I wrote it on the uke but I have zero recording equipment; the voice recording is dodgy enough! So I used the auto guitar in Garage Band on iPad. I also have no idea how to use Garage Band...

So you want to be a nurse
There’s a few things you have to do
Get yourself on Access
Or an A level or two
Write a personal statement
Do well at interview
Then there’s only one thing left to do…

Come to Brighton
It’s the uni by the sea
Come to Brighton
Validated by the NMC
Come to Brighton
It’s the place you want to be
Come to Brighton
And get your nursing degree
Come to Brighton

So you start your first year off
Excited to see what’s in store
You can’t wait to get your sensible shoes
Through the hospital front door
You know how to measure heart rate
But really not much more
And you realise you’re starting to adore

Being at Brighton
It’s the uni by the sea
Being at Brighton
Validated by the NMC
Being at Brighton
It’s the place you want to be
Being at Brighton
To get your nursing degree
Being at Brighton

Now your first year’s finished
And your OSCE is all done
You’ve helped admit two patients
And made a clinic overrun
You’ve been vomited, bled and shat on
But you’ve still had loads of fun
Your nursing journey has finally begun

Year two begins in earnest
And the essays are relentless
Your overdraft is all used up
You really wish you’d spent less
You’ve heard about the “second year slump”
But you really thought they meant less
And your mentor made you dress a testicular abscess

At Brighton
It’s the uni by the sea
At Brighton
Validated by the NMC
At Brighton
It’s the place you want to be
At Brighton
To get your nursing degree
At Brighton

You’re halfway through the course now
The acute exam is over
You’re pretty good at discharge plans
And giving a handover
You understand STEMI and asthma,
AKI, COPD,
Angina, Sepsis, DKA, and HIV

It’s nearly the end of second year
Things are getting really tough
At least you now understand when it’s
Pseudomonas or just slough
You’re trying your best on placement
But your mentor’s really gruff
And just at the point when you think you’ve had enough
You remember… 

You’re at Brighton
It’s the uni by the sea
You’re at Brighton
Validated by the NMC
You’re at Brighton
It’s the place you want to be
You’re at Brighton
To get your nursing degree
At Brighton

It’s finally your final year
With dozens of exams
Your walls are covered with pictures of lungs
And leadership diagrams
Your patients are starting to trust you
The poor sweet deluded lambs
Don’t they know you still can’t read Electrocardiograms?

You’re on the home strait now
You just need that last tick
You got through your OSCEs and viva
And medication arithmetic
You can deal with lots of patients
Even the ones who are really sick
You’re nearly a nurse 
It’s happening far too quick

But it happened at Brighton
It’s the uni by the sea
It happened at Brighton 
Validated by the NMC
It happened at Brighton 
It’s the place I still want to be
It happened at Brighton 
It’s everything they said it would be
Come to Brighton...

Come to Brighton

notquiteanurse