A rocking chair
A cotton ball
The wooden floors
That line the halls

A parking lot
A brand new bike
And autumn trees
A Homebush hike

Detention slip
An old guitar
A backwards flip
A bandaged arm

A maccas run
A school report
On VHS
And weekend sport

What could I want
At twenty-one
My greatest days
Are passed and done

An honest life
A stable job
A faithful wife
The kids, the dog

A vintage wine
A mortgage bill
Arthritic hands
A daily pill 

A Christmas tree
Department store
A weekly shop
A well-mopped floor

An honest life
A stable job
A faithful wife
The kids, the dog

This prophecy
Is slow and mild
I’m wishing still
I were a child

Wanting

All the while across the room
You’re friendly with the skirting board
Should we do the cat and mouse
From six pm til early dawn

An inch and inch across the room
These timid moves are overdrawn
I’m so tired of acting coy, 
cos if you never shoot you never score

Darling what’s your favourite meal, 
is it a bit of crumpet on a sunday morn?
I live real close, the fridge is stocked
I’ll hang a grape vine off the bedroom door

Yes this beast, it has two backs
I’m itchy like a rabid dog
And I feel so fucking cool
I’ll write about it on my blog

Oh I play nice to treat you mean
Let’s get to business on the kitchen floor
I’ve run out of subtleties, 
I have a finite number of metaphors

So let’s live out this fantasy, well
In the bathroom, car, or on the lawn
Maybe haberdashery,
Or the needle section of the fabric store

And we can
And we can
And we can

Loom

Loom

oh what a tale 
that I tell
just to ground myself in my self
strangers are closer than my old self

and as I speak
I can’t speak
just how big it all really felt
how real I once really felt

now I’m at that age
I start to wait
to see how things are gonna be
I changed my mind I want to breathe 

but this mirror you
is jamais vu
let’s hang out and see it through
I promise that I’ll see me through

let me tell this tale
that I tell
cos I used to tell it just to dwell
I think I told it until I was well

I’m not scared
no I’m not scared
I’m not scared 
I’m not

Ground

it’s a stomach ache, a nauseous feeling
I get vertigo from all this living
the rattle of a brain wave always ringing
in a neural choir, a synapse singing 

I could wet myself from trepidation
or I’ll suffer now under sedation 
the only thing I fear’s dissociation		
so drown my sense in overload sensation

//

I’m the universe, the whole empire
pull myself apart to fuel a fire
none of these human parts really matter
just a fleshy mess of dumb desire
 
your life is neither moot nor revelation
you breathe, you shit, you laugh, til expiration
nothing’s here for your own inspiration
the world’s a lung and you’re one exhalation

Decillion

Everything I’ve ever known I’ve known through sense
But there have been times I’ve mistaken a shadow for a figure
There have been times I thought I heard someone calling my name
In an empty room
On a Tuesday afternoon
Sometimes I wonder if the red I see if the same red for you
Sometimes I wonder if qualia is the gap between me and you
Or just a word that captures a real existential discomfort
A real pain in the ass
A phantom limb
Persisting perception disorder from cheap hallucinogens
So I meet the world with a cognitive map of its terrain
Composed in my brain
To sort through the junk of a lifetime of sensing
And I wonder if my neighbour does the same
And if their truths are my truths
And if our rules are the same, if and when we play the same game

Everything

You like thee
With skin like thee
Some don’t speak
They’re better seen

Would you only love me
Would you only love me
If I learn to shut my mouth
If I start to fold my body down

Crafts

I’ve freckled arms
They’ve tasted sun
My crow’s feet eyes
And worn out gums

Waking up for breakfast
Just to count the seconds
I’m so tired of looking
With my head turned backward

My hair grows thin
But head so wide
Translucent skin
But thickened hide

I could love a lifetime
Of just counting seconds
I'm so tired of looking
With my head turned backwards

When comes the day
I count my fears
On just one hand
But tally years

//

So fill my life
With facts and figures
All things are arbitrary
Until they’re my experience

When I get to shedding
My whole past and present
When the growing’s finished
Is the living pleasant?

So here I stand
Not here, nor there
Just as I am
Just as it fairs 

When I’m old and dying
Will my mouth remember
All the contours of these very
Vouls and consonants

And when I’m old and dying
Will my self remember
Just how it felt to be
In a constant wonder

Ancient

13.03.19 Flutejam

After, this time
I find, nowhere
To hide, I am
On my, own

Were my, insides
Like my, outsides
Then my, body
Home

16.05.19 (2)

Looking at the sky
All I saw was blue
And when I turned away
The image stayed the same

It was blue, through and through
And the longer I stared - it stayed

How I’d pass the time
Hoping for some change
And cursing at the sky
To wash me clean with rain

It was blue, through and through
And the longer I stared - it stayed

And many years had passed
My photokeratitus
Had set   in to last
I could not see the slightest

All the visions that once troubled me
They were through
But not a cloud did I ever see

27.05.19

I just made this account so i could keep uploading music without getting Spotify Go. here's Sabrina 1 https://soundcloud.com/smabrina96

Sabrina 2

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