Curtain Call Reordered

LYRICS

D.B. Cooper:
I’ve got a verse here, so for my opening
I request a cigarette, as I’m about to smoke this kid
You’ve got windows making your crew all head to depression
I’ve got Bond-style escape plans; 00-727
D.B. Cooper, I drop bombs a plenty 
against T.V. bloopers, average emcees
This washup would fit with the rest of my bundles of dollars
Know that I go for the throat, remind you of your father?

Dead Bart:
Were you trying to impress me? You should know I’m good at breakthroughs
I’m jumpin’ on this beat like it was your escape route
This dude couldn’t even see the better choice for a main ‘chute
So I’ll be eating up this track like “what’s the deal with airplane food?”
I left Matt Groening crying when he read up on my story
You left the plane when the flight got a little too boring
And I thought I was the sitcom, but when I look at this loser
He looks less like Dan and more like Sheldon Cooper
Facin’ off with Dead Bart, now your heartbeat might stop
This sketch’s sketchy headshot went up for a high cost
But your body’s most likely outlined with white chalk
Now FOX’s best son’s stealing Zodiac Earhart’s time slot
You hit the runway and still, no one knows what your name is
I hit the runway and my face instantly became famous
Even with a rainstorm, I still got colder bars in this fight
So take your leave and take a leap into the dark of the night

D.B. Cooper:
I thought the Simpsons’ could drop bars, but it’s clear you can’t battle me
When your rapping’s more barebones than your family
And you wrote down all the tropes you decided to ride on
Then turned the creepypasta genre to the Squidward Suicide Squad
Keep this bank noted as I’m crushing this duel
Even my blank motive has more substance than you
Leave the tank loaded and get the show on the road
And when I’m flowing, know that I’m holding a grudge in this feud
The Nightmare at 20,000 Feet, towering over your treehouse
Thinking this D.B. beef is gonna leave me beat? How?
I’m hijacking this win, as you’re left shaking and crying 
Leaving you like my legacy - radio silent

Dead Bart:
Traveling on Northwest, yet your plan still went south
Go eat my shorts, man, open the stairwell and step out
And make like your exit and drop this fight
Chalk your loss up as another prediction we’ve gotten right

CREDITS 

Swizkii as D.B. Cooper
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCs4l43CoLWyUMdaWq9S_SKA
Shimario as Dead Bart
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCsFyrvAhPhiEvJ1yL_Ux8MQ

Written by Rabi
Mixed and mastered by Freshy Kanal
https://soundcloud.com/freshy-kanal
Beat by Insanebeatz
Dead Bart art by 01Tyler10
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCrIDPJLlnUFILYuS72fIc1g
Thumbnail by Rabi

D.B. Cooper vs. Dead Bart - Rap Battle

Ready for Round Two?
Spidey Fam as Sonic.exe
Mancha as Squidward's Suicide
Beat produced by Tantu
Beat mixed by GlitchDude
Written by Trakked
Additional help by M!CAH, Nooby, Candyman, M&Mattie, Worms, Snakebite126 and QuickDissa
Mixed by Jort
Thumbnail by Jort
Art by Trakked

Battle:

Sonic.exe:
ACT ONE: I’m the guy that drives readers to madness
YOU CAN’T RUN, hell, you can’t even get off your mattress
How do you expect to win if you act like you live
Under the BLACK SUN, stop acting like your life's been so tragic
Yeah, you should begin to bow, on the ‘net I’m infamous
Get a soul and rip it out, they know fun is infinite 
You think that you’re different, now? You know death is imminent.
Suicide, I won’t allow. You don’t get that privilege.
And I will say, it’s brave that you went to perform on stage
But they’d much rather cave their faces in than hear you for a day
But I’ll help you before you crack under pressure again
Your episode and soul are lost; come and play with me, friend..

Squidward’s Suicide:
I’d like to play you a song. Sit down and listen.
I’m disappointed with all the shots that you’re missing.
And you’re attempting to escape from the cartridge that bottles you?
Note to evade the Minors while you’re suffering in Solitude
Your Hopes and Dreams have been buried since your beginning
You cheat at every game you play, yet there is emptiness in winning.
And like me, you’ve degraded to a shell of yourself
Sonic can't handle ocean flow, so I'll drench you as well

Sonic.exe:
Oh, what's wrong, Squidward? Am I getting in your head?
You know that your neighbors hate you and would rather have you dead
Wouldn't you agree that you've been soft with your lines, friend?
You may have some more disses, but you've so little time left…
Let’s play Hide and Seek, you’re behind that ego and tryna be something quite unique
But your lines are weak and your life is bleaker; don’t cry to me, now it’s time to see 
You are merely a toy on my shelf to play with, I’ll shred you and tear you and rip your face, then
Blast your head to Red Mist, like the dead kids, what do you expect when you play with Satan?
DO IT. Now that you’ve seen the terror I have wrought,
A hopeless soul will burn forever knowing I Am God.

Squidward’s Suicide:
Why do you keep trying? I can’t take any more of this…
You take your only friends and leave them like the tortured kids
We’re both failures, yet you have no excuse.
Grab the strings you pull to hang yourself and prove yourself some use.
You try and try to hide them yet your flaws aren’t so hard to see
Since you and Sally couldn’t make a perfect harmony
You hunted Amy down to stop her from breaking your heart
But try to take apart my frames, and you’ll end up taken apart.
No more games. No more tricks, and I will never be your friend.
Your files are executable, so now you face the end.
You think you’re some eldritch deity inside a franchise
You're not a god, all 8-bits of your frames have died
Your reality exists within a cell
I'll pull the plug on your computer, then see you in Hell.

Sonic.exe vs Squidward's Suicide - Rap Cypher #40

Happy mother's day

BobcatXtreme as Antonio Tabacchi
Zawesome as Buck Cluck
Writing by Alchemyking
Art by A Trash Artist and Luke Reardon
Beat by ENNWAY and Leo Barqui
Mixing by SIR Rap Battles
Cover art by JK03
Special thanks: Freshy Kanal, Eric the Audible, SimplyRazzy, MultiSuperVids, Belle Beniko, Taiga, LimJJ, Pure Ice Blue

Antonio:
How’d you end up down here? This site’s forbidden knowledge!
Well… I guess you look like someone who needs College
Well, no matter. When I chop your head off, you’ll wish you fled faster
Said your son should take it up, but I’m the true chessmaster
You’re the most pathetic Disney chicken since McWhiggin
Dishing out burns like Azoth, now that’s finger lickin’
Send you down a well or pipe; it fits, ‘cause you’re washed up
What’s a fall like that? You’re already at the barrel’s bottom
I admit, I led my daughter down there to die
But your film’s still the worst tragedy of 2005
You were the first sign your fans would weep hopelessly
Lily’s failed clones are animated less horribly
Crow that you’re the best ‘cause your son rised to the challenge
Both you and my research incite violent reactions
Quit mourning Chloe, ‘cause now I’ve also laid you to rest
A jack of all trades about to take an Ace out the deck

Buck:
I can tell you’re bluffing away
But you gotta listen to your peers, even if they got nothing to say!
For a guy running a College, this professor’s stupid
Between your life and game, I can’t tell which has the worse resolution
You need to get your facts straight on what you think matters
Whacked your offspring because she trashed your weed whacker
After the Acorn Incident, I know a nutjob
But hey, I guess both you and your daughter were cut off!
Don’t fuck with the Buck to the Cluck
I wish my son would shut up, but at least he knows when something is up
And I’m always there to tuck him in covers
You suffocated your daughter; you’re supposed to leave her smothered with love!
Aw, what’s the matter? Hung up like the love of your life?
You’d only have a son if it was a chunk of the sky
So don’t talk ‘bout my parenting tactics
‘Cause a dad as rotten as you should be left down there with the maggots

Antonio:
That verse was just another thing meddled with by editors
What, you gonna shoehorn a pop song in your second verse?
And with dated references, this chicken’s tasteless
Call them Chicken Little, ‘cause your claims are baseless!
Neglecting Ace ‘cause you don’t wanna be seen as a fuckup
With how you’re never there for him, I should call you Buck Cuck
Keep in mind, the depths of the well are limitless,
And all it takes to fall down is One Little Slip.

Buck:
Dropping your little girl down won’t help you raise a kid
When my kid’s abducted, it’s by actual aliens!
You tried to make her scared of outsiders
But now your relationship’s at a loose end even she can’t tie up!
After the invasion, I sure know how to weave through streets
So I commend the way that both your daughters fleed the scene
How ironic for a game made by Pure Ice
That this is just the second time you’ve been burned nice

Antonio Tabacchi vs. Buck Cluck (Lily's Well vs. Chicken Little) - Disney Rap Battles!

garbageGothic as Vena (Psychopomp)

Near as Eleanor (Subway Midnight)

Beat: U-Boat by Ihaksi
Mixed by: SIR Rap Battles
Written by: TaigaTonic
Thumbnails by: M!CAH
Art by: Nooby and Syroquise 
Special Thanks: Shimario, Duckky, bubbydarkstar, Karbonic, Sketchy

Psychopomp:
I’m sick of the fucking noise so now I gotta scream at the fucking void
Stalking victims and playing with them like they were just a toy
I’m nailing those who cross me, while I go fulfill my vision
Leave you broken like the connections and body’s of your siblings! 
Cause you couldn't save them so you were driven mad. Now
stuck to the shadows cause you’re blending in the background 
They tried hiding the truth from me, and thought that I wouldn't mind it
Lying behind their fucking masks but now I leave them open minded

So stay quiet, I know your schtick, same cliche every story did
Lost someone close to them and now thinks murder as revenge is warranted
To fix their broken, lonely heart but can’t realize it doesn't work. Your
running from all of your fucking problems like it was fucking Subway Surfers

Fallen as a victim to the system now your riding 
off the back of all the cultists your creator put in hiding
I crushed The Head of Production and left The Queen dismembered too 
Treat you like the other sinners without a SINGLE SOUL TO REMEMBER YOU

Subway Midnight:
Easy with the tongue, Miss…. I don't really like your tone
You should know it’s not safe being on a track alone
Cause sunken souls can manage to paint more than dreams haunted
…and I made them all scream just because I wanted

You were daunted by voices but you wasn’t really hearing much
Just like Benny, craving praise but it was more than his dreams that was being crushed
They pumped you up with dopamine so you can reach the top unrivaled
But as each of the vessels break she just repeats another cycle

Search for your child, cause you were cursed with denial
And blew up your Biggest Fan and now it hurts just to smile
But as each day passes you are slowly forgotten
As a new Queen spreads her wings and you are what you tried stopping

The Dragonfly said to be a savior once birthed
But is more a mosquito sucking the life outta Blood Earth
So you can waste your days and continue to wander around
But if you wanna topple more catacombs I can help you underground

Psychopomp:
Sure that’d Be Nice to insight your torturous wreck
But I don't wanna take a ride on the Bi-Polar Express
Made more go missing cause when you were it wasn't brought to attention
Took a crack for a midnight snack cause you were starved for affection

But hadn’t managed to be fed, I’ll bash a hammer ‘gainst your head
And leave you swimming with the sharks until the fish finally rest
While I’m walking to Earth's center through the Mariana Trench
You ripped the souls out of their bodies ‘til they tore your own to shreds

Subway Midnight:
Starved… Like the Thraits at the bottom left rotting
Cause now it seems The Caldmen Four are the only ones watching 
So as you blossom know I left Rose to decay
Cause I kill Vermin Dogs that lead you astray

And you were let off your leash but you could barely manage
Cause you were down in the basement and couldn't do any damage
So don’t panic Vishneri, it's time we got off
Smile for the camera, this will be your final stop


[SCRAPPED] Subway Midnight vs Psychopomp - Rap Battle! (ft. Near & garbageGothic)

WATCH THE FULL VIDEO: https://youtu.be/aaE2Isa1rPQ

Brodecai as Slenderman (Audio)
Dudz as Slenderman (Video)
Vladimyr P. as Jeff The Killer (audio) 
Dudz as Jeff The Killer (Video)
YDGeon as Announcer

Slenderman: 

Confusion is what humans may feel with my presence
but nothing compares to your whole storie’s coherence
The photos will show that a threat’s what i pose 
I brought fear to the mist, your whole thing’s getting smoked!
not close as a foe, either way, i’m approaching
No traces, thats why i’m acting silenced
When least expected, they’ll be infected 
feeling burnt out to end up missing like your eyelids
My legend’s what settled this whole sensation 
Spreading shock and fright to entire nations 
Looks like ripped off Joker can’t be taken so serious
The only cracks you got just made you go delirious
Rejected by the Wiki, and your fans grew tired
How you’re gonna fire back when your status backfired?
Dare to enter my domain, there's no way you can survive
 but judging by your face, you’re always due to ‘’crossing lines’’
   
Jeff the killer:

Jeff the killer, death is quicker 
So you better run while you still can
Arrive at night, sharp as my knife 
That's why i’m gonna slice up Slenderman!
Enter your domain? as if it was your reign
But you forgot something: I GOT WOODS ON MY NAME!
My lines are packing heat, cuz i’m giving burns like bleach
Feeling stressed? should be! you’re next on my murder spree 
Tried to hit the big screen, and your film was a debacle
That budget couldn’t prevent you of being Something Awful
cuz a game brought your fame, then decayed years later
As always, you’re a lame excuse to seeking paper
For the genre, it is true that you've paved the way 
But thanks to rap battles, you went from slaying to slave
So don’t faze my rage if you still think i'm that weaker
I beat all bullies by myself, you got outclassed by a math teacher!

Slenderman: 

Slit your mouth yet those words have failed to cut deep
Causing snores is the only way you’ll make go to sleep
The damage i create can’t be healed from any mind  
You pass the same effect when seen on Gacha Life
the impact i left goes beyond some numbers
All proxies by my side, you’re only loved by Tumblr
I guess your bad rap/rep is just too hard to cover 
Struggling behind bars? should’ve learned with your brother

Jeff the Killer:

Did you teleport your rhymes? Cuz they felt so out of place
 Should’ve expected that when you lack a mouth on your face
Calling out my targets, as if yours aren’t offensive 
You’re easy to defeat; take a seat with Chris Hansen
See the bigger picture: no one’s scared of your horror
So do what you do best and just stay in the corner
Put some meaning on your writing, so its not bland as usual
Suit and tie fit just right, since this became your own funeral *laughs*

Eyeless Jack:
Its Eyeless Jack here! 
Messing with me is quite risky
Once i murder on this beat, i'll go and eat  
your ki- 
*gets shot and falls on the floor*   

Dudz:
Dude, who the heck let this guy in? The battles finished!
*sigh* Fricking royales…


Written By Dudz
Addit. Writing Help by Vladimyr P., Bacon Pancake & Brodecai
Researching Help By Danii
Beat prod. by HEKS
Mixed and Mastered by Captain Jorge
Thumbnail and cover art by Cidisswo


EYELESS JACK CREDITS

Dudz as Eyeless Jack 
Other Eddie as himself

Written by Dudz
Beat prod. by 2Deep
Mixed by Cidisswo


Special thanks to JotaSeis, Cidisswo, Vladimyr P., Captain Jorge, My Parents, Matthew Thomas, ERBParodies and you

JEFF THE KILLER VS SLENDERMAN- AMATEUR RAP BATTLES

ENNWAY as Quote
Lexi M. As Ted the Caver
Written by JK03 and Tess
Additional Writing by ENNWAY
Beat produced by ENNWAY
Mixed by ENNWAY
Cover Art by BELSXN

Quote (0:21):
When I woke up, my way out was to brave this death site
But they’d have to pay me to navigate that website
You’re not fit for this, the pressure’s intense
No red flowers in sight, and yet you’re still looking pressed

You spent a whole (hole) 3 months of your blog not exploring
Drilling with your story, you kill me, it’s so boring
Droning on hopelessly, repeating descriptions
Of a single opening, next thing you know you’ll be riddled with them

You dragged your friends in your mess and failed to conquer it
Jenka's taking better care than your pack of goners did
It doesn’t take amnesia to forget the spread you wrote
I’ll stun you into silence 'fore you get to end Quote

Ted the Caver (0:54):
It’s time to log a new entry for another find
Turns out there is something hiding on the other side
An abandoned fighter tasked to find the mad device to rescue lives
And that is why he answers his companion crashing down by prancing by?

I ride at night, exploring shafts for that adrenaline high
Shed light on more than just the panties catching eyes from this guy.
All those swords don’t mean that you’re the cut-out man for the job
When you’re paper-thin, but fail at throwing hands with some rocks

Quote (1:16):
You're worth about as much as the cameras you dispose
You treat your rapping like the caves that you search - If it blows, it goes
I come strapped, .45 on my hip
You got 45 pages biting Blair Witch

You can’t land a hit. Your shots tend to miss me.
Your movie unilaterally bombed, Ted Cave-zynski
So, you got reckless? The cave left you breathless?
Here’s how big a fuck I give. Stick your glove up there for reference.

Ted the Caver (1:38):
You’re shackled to Nicalis, but let’s see your boys sue
When you get your ass reduced to scrapped assets in Floyd’s Tomb
Amaya's vision was lobotomized by corporate choices
Now I'll drill this in your mind, so we're both hearing voices

Your crude graphics and designs can’t be haunting my mind!
I’ve seen scrabbles on walls on my rides better drawn than your sprites!
We’re pretty different! I’m committed to my mission
While you’d ditch your shit and dip the first occasion that you’re given!

Stranded in the island’s depths, this bot’s a lost cause
I have to find the end to the tale of this cave at all costs!
Try to cross me, you won’t stop my path to see this case cracked
I won’t need constant ports for me to make my way ba…

(Ted runs off into the darkness of the cave, never to be seen again)

Cave Story vs Ted the Caver - 100 Hour Rap Battle Challenge

Vanes as Roxanne Wolf

TaigaTonic as Claptrap

Beat by Diamond Style
Mixed by: Danii
Written by: TaigaTonic
Thumbnail by: M!CAH
Art by: Xoniq and Snakebite126
Special Thanks: garbageGothic, HazelMoth, JustGamer, TAFox, & Grasman

Roxanne:
You can already hear the fans scream my name while I play
So I thought I told you S.T.A.F.F. bots to stay outta my way!
(Ugh!) Do I really have to deal with more pests
I guess let's get this party started because I AM THE BEST! (YEAH!)

You like to gamble? Fazcade can get you back on track
Cause you took your films budget and put it all on Black
Like Bonnie you were worried about a strike when you dropped the ball
And act surprised when you had realized that you lost it all

Nobody cared for your birthday, so you tried to invite the whole town?
I guess you gotta have moxie, but even she turned you down
Sad, since that open door stays a core part of your life
But blabber bout me to your bandits, It’s all bark and no bite

Claptrap:
How’s it going friend! My name is Claptrap!
And you should know that I’m programmed to spit some phat raps!
But I gotta ask, cause my servers still needs to wake up
Why does a final product need to be made up with makeup?

All it took was 1 kid before you started getting bothered
“It's all bark and no bite” Until you’re tearing up toddlers
Then you're tearing in the mirror cause the “wannabe’s” don't like you
If that's how you treat yourself, then I don’t wanna be like you

But OF COURSE you were appealing to no one but lonely dweebs
Cause this dumb dog playing rough is what kept them on a leash
You're not that much of a bad ass, so this will be your last act
Cause you have fallen TO THE GREAT ALMIGHTY CLAPTRA-AHHHH

Roxanne:
GOD you're so annoying no wonder everyone grew bitter
Since a best friend dies and people treat you like the mood killer (Hey Friend?)
If some losers hadn't shown sympathy you wouldn't get far (Buddy…)
Cause you- HEY! WHAT! Look out for the (AH-) (crash sfx) kart…

Get this through your head, you're a screw up and know its true
Blew up Overlook cause no one cared to look over you
And once the townspeople thought you couldn't make things worse
You started burning bridges and killed everyone in the church

You’re pathetic! So every team wanted to do nothing but rid you
And you scrapped up your love life, just for it to also ditch you
When it blew up in your face no one was standing there with you
So when you're staring at a barrel, know nobody’s gonna miss you

Claptrap:
At least I’m not the garbage that your fans like to eat up
Cause I’m covered in less grease than a single slice of your pizza
I mean is that the shit that you've been dishing out this whole time?
If beauty’s in the eye of the beholder, NO WONDER you went blind (HA!)

You always wanted to have your big break in the spotlight
But your time for a photo finished the second that you got sidelined
Thought you could mask your loss with more makeup but the truth is
You're just another hunk of junk, now your foundation’s in ruins

And nobody wants to see your ass on the stage
So you can… BEEP BOOP while I BOOP BEEP on your grave
Now I leave to squabble with the rest of my minions
Cause my greatness was something you couldn't rise from the Mimic


Roxanne Wolf vs Claptrap - Five Nights at Freddy's vs Borderlands - Rap Battle! Ft. Vanes

TaigaTonic as Polybius
Dilly Scott as Porygon
Beat produced by MIDES
Written by Trakked, Dilly Scott and 3ple
Additional help by Shimario and Jpegdogs
Mixed by Jordy
Art by TomPuffs
Thumbnail by TomPuffs

Battle:

Polybius: (0:21)
Before you start to fight me, I would advise
Don't look directly in the screen because I'll blind you with lights (uh)
I use strings of code bigger than you when I load
If you Convert into my cyberspace, your mind will be fried
Drop a quarter in, see the phenomenon they're talking 'bout
An innovative game that makes the bank and draws the crowds
You couldn't block me out, even if you tried 
Want to go back in your Pokeball? That's not an option now. 
I'd talk about your looks, with your cubic features
But you'd fit right in with your new releases
You don’t have purpose and you shoot your beams cuz
You're only flashy when you're inducing seizures
The players catch Zs when you're on the screen
Cuz this automaton has been obsolete 
You once had a use… but that's not the case now
You can't go in orbit… but I'll leave you spaced out.

Porygon: (1:04)
I ain’t sparing no change to a made up coin op-eration
To conclude your story a hoax I just go travel through data 
You think you're shady, man? Game consists of random shapes and crazy graphs
Dragged you out the room ‘cause arcades knew you wouldn’t make ‘em crap
Causing fatalities like it's MK Ultra..
But on the PlayStation store they tell me nobody played ONCE
Some people were dedicated to find ya
Then fans of your story went from datamining to seeing dated writing
Your legend makes my head spin
And the men in black suits must’ve deleted your senses
They paid off the feds since, and your casualties were written off as accidents
So now I’m damaging this cabinet
Gone without a Trace, you’re a fad of the past
Went up in smoke like you left for ‘em like Ash’s dad
You’re so forgettable to the people that played ya
So if you wiped their memories, it wouldn’t really change much

Polybius: (1:47)
You're low-res: a dream of fame for you is hopeless
Everything you spat sounded Pory-phoned in
You're made to break and I am losing patience.
If you see your win, it's a hallucination.

Porygon: (1:57)
So many Secrets and Lies that all the agents devised 
To keep you inside the minds of all the players
You’re beaming lights in their eyes and it leads to their demise
You try to see into mine, I’ll make your brain hurt
I cannot be copy/pasted, yet you're copping my flow
I've seen more addictive gameplay from Pokemon GO
Try to send me your subliminal messages, I’ll escape em
This battle is over because Polybius fainted

Polybius:
Pika hit some missiles with electric flow
Then they had to seize your episode because of seizure episodes
The anime banned you, but it wasn't your fault
Now I'm not the only one that's getting locked in a vault.


Porygon vs Polybius - Rap Cypher #42

Titanium1208 as Harvey Birdman
Chaotic Rap Battles as Captain Falcon
Beat produced by marvin's creation and GlitchDude
Written by Trakked
Mixed by Jordy
Art by TreToonz
Thumbnail by Trakked

Battle:

Harvey Birdman:
It's.. Harvey Birdman, and I'll enter this race
A bounty hunter from space? I think I WON'T take the case!
I'm powered by the sun, you think your flames could hurt me?
Then prepare to feel the power of attorney! 
They call it F Zero 'cuz they give Zero F's
Like Nintendo, I'm forgetting any fame you had left
There's no defending you, or need to find a witness
Cuz the only writing you do is copyright infringement!
You're the type of guy to go to a victim and tell them to stop resisting
Then beat 'em up and lock 'em in prison,
So no, the law is not above these crooked cops in our system
If you think you're seeing freedom, I'm guessing that visor's blocking your vision
Your series manages to go in all the wrong directions
There is no question on whether you got the diss that I sent ya
Better call up your colleagues, you're gonna need Avenging
You're far behind, so use your time and try to catch up

Captain Falcon:
There are two types of rappers on this beat:
The ones who fail at every turn and crash and burn, and me
I suggest you retreat; everybody knows I’m packing a punch
I’ll get Birdgirl and take her to FALCON LUNCH!! 
(Haha!) You’re better off throwing this match
‘Cuz I’m the only one between us who has ever rode a track
I’m getting first place in every race, I can’t lose
While you’re ending up getting your crest taken from you (YES!)
With the way you’re treating Peanut, you must be allergic
With every case you make, you turn the courtroom to a circus
I come back from explosions, bitch, you know you couldn’t hurt this
You couldn’t host with Space Ghost, even he knows that you’re worthless
I’d say show me your moves, but we both know that you would crack under the pressure
I’m able to kick ass because I’m simply better
You’re a shitty lawyer, and the evidence is damning
So shoot your rays at me, I think that I could use some tanning (Ha!)

Harvey Birdman:
Say, Captain, 
How do you explain the dangers that they keep the other racers trapped in?
A violation of safety is what your track is
You participate in races that most often end in deadly crashes!
This case is closed; now, remember for the future;
You’re not exactly setting the best example for viewers
You’ve been found guilty of being a massive failure
Tried to fly from justice, now this Falcon is a jailbird

Captain Falcon:
(C'mon!) You can't take jabs at me, I know your life is broken
This.. case may be closed, but your.. marriage is open
From your wife to your boss, you don’t really have that much more to lose
I have another Blue Falcon that they love more than you!
Fast to make accusations, but we both know I'm quicker
The only bar exam you've taken's when you drown yourself in liquor 
I'll hit you like another bus; break all your vertebrae 
That’s just what Harvey gets for messing with a bird of prey



Captain Falcon vs Harvey Birdman - Rap Cypher #44

MidgeCat as Mr. Widemouth
Grasman as The Webkinz Killer
Beat produced by Zyller Beats
Written by Trakked
Additional help by M&Mattie
Mixed by Jordy
Art by VibingLeaf
Thumbnail by Trakked

Battle:

Mr. Widemouth:
I’m so excited, I just found a new friend!
When you play with Mr. Widemouth, the fun never ends!
So, stand in the corner, close your eyes and don’t peek
Cuz you’re disguising your identity like hide and go seek
But if the people found out your secret they’d go and lock you up
Execute, electrocute you and that’s really not so fun
We all have our secrets, but your rumor is an awful one
Spread around the classroom like bodies after you shot your gun
I'm better than any Webkin that you have ever seen 
Cuz I make any pet look like garbage right next to me
So jump off the balcony; come and let me snap your wings
You won't go splat if you imagine there’s a trampoline…

Webkinz Killer:
Welcome to my office, but wait, you’re not a Webkin
After this lesson, I’ll still be giving you a present
Must have gotten ill from all of the sick kids you’re hurtin’
So don’t worry; I have a permanent cure for this vermin
With a smile that wide, I’m guessing you’re here for the dentist
Best get ready for your checkup, this’ll only take a second
I reckon I should rev up the engine for your beheading
So remember, it isn’t just medicine that I’m dispensing!
The kids and I are not your friends,
You got defeated by a child that had some common sense
Whenever the parents come you’re hiding under all the beds, looking like a bobblehead
My office could use some color, so watch me paint the walls with red

Mr. Widemouth:
Ooh, we playing pretend? Then let me be the doctor now!
Your site has a virus and it’s time for me to stomp him out
I don’t even need an apple to keep the doc from my house
If I cut your head off you would still run your mouth!
I’m loved by everyone; the kids were terrified of you
They heard about your murders then the devs went and retired you
I promise you’ll be safe.. Let me take you to a better space..
Close your eyes and you’ll be resting in my special place…

Webkinz Killer:
How about you stop luring the kids into your basement?
No one wants to play with you, but you try to be too persuasive
You’re making me lose my patience; I’m willing to lose this patient
You will find I’m violent, I’m prescribing euthanasia 
So I’ll burn up this Furby like I murdered Mrs. Birdy
Imagine all you want, bitch, your words could never hurt me!
I’ll be sure to leave a sight that any child would remember
I’ll have you severed; now you’ll play the quiet game forever




Mr. Widemouth vs The Webkinz Killer - Rap Cypher #46

Eric the Audible as Waldo
Gridline Rap Battles as Agent 47
Beat produced by MIDES
Written by Trakked and Worms
Mixed by Jordy
Art by Rytchiee and SkydivingQuagga
Thumbnail by Worms

Battle:

Waldo: (0:10)
Hey, I'm glad you found me, but now you're ‘bout to regret it
I’m bout to set a new record, wrap your mission up in seconds
So get ready for a lesson, I ain’t favoring crooks
But if you wanna learn to hide, then take a page from my book
Wearin’ them red and white stripes cuz I'm the flyest dude
I got this on and I don’t even need a tie and suit
That dome is shining, they can see through your disguises, too
IOI needs to head back into the writer’s room (yuh)
You’re tryna get your Wood to Burn
But your handler’s abandoned you at every single turn
Yeah, me and Diana, man, we're sharing a bed
Cuz the amount of game you got is like the hairs on your head
(Oh) Five fathers, but no love, you’re from a test tube
Man, you were built for everybody to forget you
I might go back in hiding when it's time for your rapping
So make like your title and stay Silent, Assassin
 
Agent 47: (0:57)
Don't be alarmed. I'm here to finish business.
I'd appreciate it if you would quit your resistance. 
Sit and listen; I’ve got lines for this eyesore,
With rhymes so divine that you’ll find they’re to die for.
So why don't I pour you a drink?
Your confusion’s understood; this happens more than you think.
Let’s have a toast. Let the moment be adorned with a clink
You'll fall down on the ground. It happens more than you think.
It’s circumstantial how I dress, you keep your outfit on forever.
Needless to say, your clothes don’t depend on the weather.
I wouldn’t be against painting more red on your sweater,
And you will never forget that I’m wearing both your colors better.

Waldo: (1:22)
Don't dog my fit; I'll take your job real quick with my famed garb
I don’t need a costume to stay under the radar
You think your sins are forgiven because you pray hard?
Your next mission should be living behind jail bars
Put down the fiber wire, we both know that you choked
So put on that clown costume ‘cuz all I see is a joke (damn!)
It seems Tobias couldn't Riep what he sowed
Hold your ducky tight and make like Grey’s head and explode

Agent 47: (1:43)
Your files are the only book with your name that I've opened. 
Your brother hates you and you don’t know how to cope with it.
You're hopeless and moping and your relationships are broken
But I'll be sure to give your girlfriends my condolences.
We both travel the globe, but I make a visible difference. 
If you visited my home you would be dealt with in minutes.
There wouldn't be a single witness since my target’s alone with me.
I have yet to break my cover since this nobody’s noticed me.
I toppled Providence and it appeared to be happenstance
I'll be bashing your glasses and make it look like an accident
So be glad that this happened; send your goodbyes in a letter
Because I just found a way to make you disappear forever.


Waldo vs Agent 47 - Rap Cypher #47

Leo Barqui as Grand Dad
Trakked as MARIO ROM
TTS as Message Box
Beat produced by Diamond Style
Written by Trakked, Syphonstick, AshleyMagica and M&Mattie
Mixed by Jordy
Art by Dboy
Thumbnail by TomPuffs

Battle:

Grand Dad:
You better listen cuz Grand Dad is bout to spit it
I smash these fads and hacks so bad I get their shit delisted
We both know that you ain’t ready, so dull, but tryna be edgy
I’ll gobble a creepypasta, hope she made lotsa spaghetti! (OHH!)
Want me to find you? How ‘bout I Yabba Dabba Don’t?
Imma barge into your castle, grab this asshole by the throat
You’re a menace to the kingdom, I can see why they can’t stand ya
I’ll stomp him like a Goomba and I’m feeling so Grand, uh
Nobody gave a single shit about that crappypasta game
Cryptic text and awful frames, you damn ROM hacks are all the same
Got high-quality raps for days, bitch, I keep the heads boppin’
They call me a Flintstone cuz me and Peach keep the bed rockin’

Message Box:
Ever since you entered this battle you signed your fate.
You hit the box Fortran, now there’s no more sign to fly away
There’s no way out of here. You’re stuck in my place now.
You're taking the selfish way out.

MARIO:
This is my world that you're stepping in
I'm glad you had your fun in all your ten seconds of relevance
Designers so lazy that they ripped off a TV show’s game
I guess they did bring gaming back into the stone age!
I’ll splatter you across your shitty barren levels 
And then I’ll turn a played-out Vinesauce meme into some marinara 
You disgust me. You can’t win this scenario.
Who tore apart this bootleg? It’s-a me, MARIO!

Grand Dad:
Don’t you think you’ve caused enough trouble, you sleazy bastard?
You just speedran your defeat, now I’mma beat you even faster
My bootleg’s better made than you, your shtick is corrupt
The only point of advice I’d give is to shut the hell up!
You yap on and on about your crimes but I don’t give a shit
You’ve been falling off since autoscroll pushed you over the edge of the cliff
Failed like your ARG, and it wasn’t surprising, too
Players made like your victim cuz none of em had eyes on you

MARIO:
You’re ancient history, you can’t accept your time is through
You were King for a Day but now everybody despises you
So not a single person will care when I bash your head
There’s nothing you can do to change my mind about what happens next.

Message Box:
Victim #2. Another bloodied, mangled corpse.
Hand marks found across the body without a traceable source.
Skull fragments found around the ground with a club lying next to him.
No one’s left to love him. No friends or even next of kin.


7 GRAND DAD vs MARIO ROM - Rap Cypher #48

Lew Kreerdun as Burger King
M!CAH as Donkey Kong
Beat produced by Boshgie
Written by Trakked
Additional help from QuickDissa
Mixed by Jordy
Video edited by JustGamer

Battle:

Burger King:
There's no animals allowed in this place
Better not run your mouth or you'll be ground into paste
Bananas are ass my boy, you got poor taste
You want a flame grilled whoopin'? Have it your way
Bitch. I'll take your girl Candy and hurt her
Mix her up into a sludge like our Impossible Burgers
And you want some fries with that for an additional fee?
Shit, I'd burn you and your jungle up and do it for free
So grab your bongos and try to keep up 
You ain't a Kong, bro, you got a weak punch
Suck on deez nuts; this freak takes last
Grill this bitch with chicken; that's a DK Wrap
Your plots are thin like a BK wrapper 
You're only good for some pre-k laughter
You got a tie but got nothing on underneath
Brother doesn't need to cover cuz there's nothing to see

Donkey Kong:
It’s DK ‘gainst a fraud sole heir
Think you’re big shit but Kong don’t care
With flows so clean, got no need to expand, bruh
Rang up Dairy Queen and she tallied me banana
I'll get my boxing gloves and rock this schmuck
And you know that it's all because you're offering that awful lunch
You’re not an option for me when I’m feeling hungry
So make like the Kremlins, get the FUCK out of my Country
Can’t catch up to me; I’m too groovy
Put you in a barrel.. and make a dude smoothie!
I’ll Jungle Beat a fucker if he thinks that he’ll be hittin’ me
They call me a Donkey ‘cause I’m carrying this industry
This fraud is thinkin’.. women belong in the kitchen
Me and Diddy had your shit, that cook belongs in a prison
We went Kong on the building, put your wallet through some deep pain
You're a dick, King, and I served you like DK

Burger King:
…what? What the hell does that even mean?

(*two seconds of silence*)

Donkey Kong:
Mmmm. Banana.



Donkey Kong vs Burger King - Rap Cypher? #49

Trakked as Mereana Mordegard Glesgorv
Lexi M as Smile Dog
Beat produced by Mezulari, bachotag
Written by Trakked, Jpegdogs and M&Mattie
Additional help from Syphonstick
Mixed by Jordy
Art by Syroquise
Thumbnail by Worms

Battle:

Mereana (0:23):
I. See. You. 
Across from my screen.
You are a lost cause. 
I am not what I seem.
I am Mereana Mordegard Glesgorv. 
If you attempt to drag me to Hell, you will get scorched.
You are a parasite that’s looking for the next poor
Person to enter your message and get you to export.
Spread the word? No, I don’t intend to.
Let it be clear that my intention is to end you.
Despite your better efforts, you have failed to frighten me.
I believe this pet should be kept on a tighter leash.
Lend your eyes to me, so I may see.
No, I will not take lies from a jpg. 
Down, dog. It is time for you to rest. 
When I am finished, there will be nothing left. 

Smile Dog (1:09):
Incoming message, check it and pay attention
Copyright or not, this battle ends with your suspension
I heard the word was spreadin’ and was sent to this pathetic
Mess whose scare method is staring for around 20 seconds (agh)
I’m in your head; better believe that I get deep
I’m in RGB screens and your REM sleep
Shallow eyes; witness as I take a bite
But instead of a chunk, I’ll be taking over your mind
All bark, all bite, and inside your computer
It's.. Benjamin Bennett vs Canine Freddy Krueger
Keep staring, pussy, I’ll be having you scream soon
You can close your eyes but you’ll see me in your dreams, too…


Mereana (1:44):
You made a mistake. Keep your words to yourself.
Or else.. I’ll light a flame and see you burning in Hell.
You are below me. You will end soon.
You want to be remembered, but they’ll forget you.
You try to break my mind, but I am far beyond your comprehension,
For I could split your hoax apart in seconds.
Yes, you try to beckon me, but no pleading can stop me.
Youtube Headquarters will find your severed, bleeding body.

Smile Dog (2:07):
There is nothing that can save you.
Meet your fucking MovieMaker, you faker, I will break you.
I’ll delete this freak directly off the web with ease
You can’t pray for mercy as I DRAG YOU DOWN TO HELL WITH ME
(*beat change*) (2:19)
Smile Dog (Demonic):
DOG IS YOUR GOD NOW; THERE IS NO ESCAPE
OFFING THIS FRAUD; LEAVE HIM STABBED ON A STAKE
YOU’RE CONTORTING YOUR FACE AND YOU LOOK LIKE A LUNATIC
MR KUBRICK STARE WILL END WITH HIS COMPUTER BRICKED
OH BYRON, YOU SHOULD HAVE STAYED SILENT
YOU COULD HAVE BEEN USEFUL BUT YOU CHOSE TO DIE INSTEAD
NOT ONE SINGLE PERSON THAT KNEW YOU IS CRYING
NOR THOSE AT YOUTUBE HQ WHEN THEY FIND YOUR HEAD


Smile Dog vs Mereana Mordegard Glesgorv - Rap Cypher #50

Egomanic as People Playground
Acemusic as Saki Sanobashi
Beat produced by Hollywood Legend Productions
Written by Trakked, M&Mattie, AshleyMagica and Acemusic
Mixed by Jordy
Art by Grasman and Jpegdogs
Thumbnail by TomPuffs

Battle:

People Playground:
I’ve spawned in, now it seems we got a problem
A toddler’s creepypasta,  I see a hoax, I drop ‘em
Oh, I’m so scared of this deep web anime!
I bet hyper-realistic blood’s gonna be flowing down her face! (AY!)
It's so sad, to have your life ended that soon
All because you're trapped inside a bathroom from the Backrooms
You couldn’t Faraday in my facility, you’d mope and get crushed
But if you still think we’re equal then I’mma Go For A Punch

Saki Sanobashi:
Stay away from me, please. I do not wish to fight.
I don’t know why you’re angry, but I need you out my sight.
Your massacres are mindless; they erase the weight of death
I wished to stay in silence, yet you chose to waste your breath
No escape. All I can do is lie and wait
Sincerely hoping neither one of us will die today.
There is no hope.
If you wish to drag me into this needless conflict then you are at the end of your rope.

People Playground:
Yeah, your friend was slammin’ her head in the floor with all of her stamina
Then she left a hell of a mess for the janitor
Living that tragic life in the room you’re trapped inside
You end up with no loved ones:  “HAPPY FUCKING VALENTINE’S”

Saki Sanobashi:
The skies inside my mind are grayer than your skin is.
They only buy you ‘cause they wish to play this victim.
A cycle of death and rebirth through your visage;
Because of players sticking in a million syringes!

People Playground:
This one of your debates? Girl, you couldn’t be hurting me
With so many nerds and dweebs spreading fake info purposely
Yea, your story’s full of shit, both you and your fans should try a bath
I guess both you and my players bring out their inner psychopaths!
You left your viewers hanging, but they ain’t the ones in danger (*choking sfx*)
This story’s in people’s heads, but it sure isn’t a banger (*gunshot*)
So congrats! You just wasted my time, I ain’t just flaming the mic, (*fire sfx*)
But I’mma nuke this like your server, I’m done facing your lies (*nuke sfx*)

Saki Sanobashi:
How terrible…
You are the subject of horrible circumstances and murders, but you deserve it.
So terrible…
Just like your Gorses, you’ll be deformed and contorted until you burn in eternum! 
Get this through your head; with everything you’re subjected to, 
You’re just a simple pawn, yet you think they’re resurrecting you?
We are born to suffer. Though, you must have it backwards
Forever remember; you’re not deserving of my last words.


Saki Sanobashi vs People Playground - Rap Cypher #54

Cole as The Batter
Swizkii as Brad Armstrong
Beat produced by Theskybeats
Written by Trakked, Cole and Buckethead
Additional help from Buckethead
Mixed by Jordy
Art by CyanCoat
Thumbnail by TomPuffs

Battle:

The Batter (0:30):
My introduction needs no more clarification.
This track is in need of immediate purification.
You’re akin to the spectres I’ve vanquished, so learn your place and
Succumb to my holy fire and die in your isolation
Your soul has been corrupted, I've been sent to purify ya
So keep your freaks away, ‘cause I prefer to work in silence 
You cannot let go of your trauma, so here’s your reminder
Lisa is buried and serves her purpose as fertilizer.
Taste my holy wrath, and soon you shall be burning. 
You were right when you wanted a wife but said you don't deserve it.
The women went out in a flash, the same with your dreams of third base.
Can’t escape from your purpose when you don’t have one in the first place.
I change the world for the better, you’ve no excuse
I break the chains of vacants, you can’t break the cycle of abuse
When taking the blame for your friends, Columbo beat you to no end
‘Cause you went and dropped the ball and your baby atop her head.
Raised your daughter with your friends, then it ended up bloody
I'm hitting home runs, you couldn't make a home for Buddy
I shall be your instructor with something you should be taught at last:
The bottom of the bottle will not bring your daughter back.

Brad Armstrong (1:30):
You can't understand the pain that I’ve felt.
Your family dies, the only one to blame is yourself
I didn't want to see other people go through abuse
So I taught children to protect themselves against the men like you.
My mission's to protect Buddy at any cost,
Your mission's to kill your son ‘cause your love for him is lost.
Now you have nothing left to give.
You've been dead since the beginning; this is the day that I live.
Through your actions, the good in your life was thrown away. 
You don't take care of your baby, you don't know his name. 
I sheltered Buddy, yes, but at least she and I were safe
Because of you, Hugo never saw the light of day.
Created to be a father, but you ended up as worthless
You showed it in your verse, dragging on as long as Nern does
Your threats are empty, like the zones you're leaving stuck behind.
So come at me, you bitch, I'd like to see you fucking try.

The Batter (2:18):
Pop some Joy, you worthless junkie, maybe find the balls to fight me 
Or you could keep on whining and make like The Judge and bite me
This balding man is nothing; the guardians were no match for me
You’d only be sweet when turned to sugar in the factory
You have a tough shell, but on the inside you're pathetic. 
All you wanted was a hug from Buddy, but you couldn't get it. 
She hates you, Brad. That is why she purged your life. 
I'll turn this battle OFF. Adversary purified.

Brad Armstrong (2:42):
You took everything for granted, you emotionless freak
Never questioning your actions only shows that you're weak 
You needed Add-Ons to beat the ghosts and erase 'em
While I don't need a bat or even arms to bash your face in
They see you as a monster as you walk throughout the zones.
No matter what you try to do, you'll always be alone.
Destroyed your life in every step. Heh, welcome to the party, bud.
You managed to be an even worse father than Marty was.


The Batter vs Brad Armstrong - Rap Cypher #55

Art in the banner by Grenade, Banner made by SPM
Owned by Trakked
Discord: @trakked

7 GRAND DAD vs MARIO ROM - Rap Cypher #48

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