"When I Was With You" was just a concept of someone getting cheated on by their girlfriend. 14 year old me had never been with anyone. It’s funny because I used to be embarrassed of singing about a girl. Hey, past me, surprise, you’re gay! But well, over the years it just seems I foreshadowed myself and the song’s concept shaped into “someone who got rejected by their crush when she chose to be with someone else.”

LYRICS: 

Do, do, do, do, do 
Right now and be with you.

No, I'm not having this conversation again 
You don't need to explain 
because I already know 
that we weren't meant to be. 
When I dreamed, all I could see was her smile 
even though I'm mad, she's right. 
The sunrise after my cry 
that didn't solve anything, but 
seeing it reflect on her eyes 
made wanna be at her side.

Was there anything I could do to be with you? 
'Cause if there is, I'm going back 
and make my mistakes right 
Is there anything I could do to see you again? 
'Cause I'll do it right now and hold your hand 
and make what I couldn't when I was with you

Hey, wanna meet again? 
How are you today? 
What do you like to do? 
Yeah, I like to sing, my girl 
Oh, I know I've gone too far, 
but you were the one 
who chose another man 
so all I could do was stare and watch 
then you saw me, you apologized 
"I didn't mean any of this, but I think 
that we weren't meant to be"

Was there anything I could do to be with you? 
'Cause if there is, I'm going back 
and make my mistakes right 
Is there anything I could do to talk to you again? 
'Cause I'll do it right now and be with you
 
Woah, oh, oh, oh, oh 
Right now and be with you 
Woah, oh, oh, oh, oh 
Right now and be with you 
Right now and be with you 
And make what I couldn't when I was with you

Unrepairable

When I Was With You

When I Was With You (Demo)

Original by Verónica Guzmán Przybylska.

Aphasia (Short Demo)

Dancing Between Spines

Treated Like A Psycho

Nostalgic (Demo)

I made this atmospheric background for my band's demo track "Drowning In The Shower" (Check the full demo preview now @yangst). This is my second time using FL Studio and I tried a lot of the packs. This is such a cool option, it has soundtrack vibes haha.

Eyeliner Tears (Demos)

Drowning In The Shower

Drowning In The Shower (Atmospheric Keys)

I made a dark version of the intro of an upcoming @yangst song. Enjoy!

I Have Too Many Existential Crises

I Have Too Many Existential Crises (Dark Version Teaser)

I made a dark version of "I Have Too Many Existential Crises", an upcoming Yangst song I wrote, to use it as background for an edit I did of Varsovia's music video "Diseñar y Destruir". 

Lima: Then vs Now: https://vimeo.com/veronicaguzman/limathenvsnow
Diseñar y Destruir: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q78QbbIM_3o

Keys, bass & bad mixing - Verónica Guzmán
Drums - Blake Ryan

I Have Too Many Existential Crises (Dark Version)

Made a digital demo of Aphasia. It was really hard to recreate, the official version definitely needs to be played on a real piano, but it was fun playing around with the mix!

The original demo was made in 2014 and damn, it's been a while.

Unrepairable (Demos)

Aphasia (Demo)

Written, composed & performed by Verónica Guzmán Przybylska
Cover protography by Sandra Espinoza

BLINK

BLINK (Inst.)

“Wave Of Tragedy” is about feeling like you don’t belong. Even when you start believing that you can be happy, life always finds a way to fuck your hopes up.

In here, I talk about when I stopped caring about school and had to go in the summer, but I skipped the classes where I didn't have any friends. I went down to Costa Verde (Green Coast) instead, where I would just sit for hours and relax by the sea. One of those days, my mom eventually caught me and spoke with my teacher. Somehow my teacher thought I'd attended more than once (that's how invisible I was) and I barely passed. Escaping there whenever I couldn't take my family's abuse became a habit, nature is where I find comfort.

Written, composed & performed by Verónica Guzmán Przybylska

LYRICS:

Yeah, I should be fucking punished 
For ignoring life for too long
Yet I still skipped our summer school 
And I walked without direction 

I ended up by the shore
The sun burning hot on my skin
Still, I sat on a bench 
And stared at the waves crashing against tears

I got nothing that's set in stone 
For ignoring life for so long
But I'm just so sad every day 
'Cause I hate living with my family 

I ended up by the coast 
The sun fading the world's colors 
Still, I sat there and thought 
That this would never get better 

Being in my birthplace doesn't feel like home
I've been living in pain for far too long 
So far long that it frightens me to be happy 
'Cause every time that I was close,
A wave of tragedy hit against my shore

So yeah, I was fucking punished 
Moments of peace taken from me
And these sour memories 
Will follow me through the years

Wave Of Tragedy (Demo)

"BLINK" is about the current music industry and how unfair it is to artists, who are the reason the industry even exists.

I wrote this song after finding out what happens behind the scenes in the Asian idol industry and the lack of care for mental health for artists. This is not just an Asian issue, many artists overseas have spoken up. There have been many cases of suicide and self-harm from the toxicity and pressure of the industry. 

They also have financial issues, even though they're signed to big and powerful labels. These labels don't care about the people making money for them. They are ready to toss you aside and replace you at any time.

Written, composed & performed by Verónica Guzmán Przybylska
Cover photography by Sandra Espinoza

LYRICS:

One day, one day
One day, one day

I'm in a lot of mansions for work, but what do I actually own?
I wrote over a hundred songs, but you tore up every page, so
You left me with nothing but a lesson learned
I be living with cockroaches and a dirty drain
I guess it's nice to smile at the camera flash
Never thought success would mean I'd be squeezed into cash
Grasp all that I am, sell it to the highest bidder
Make it about you, forget I'm a human being
I hope one day we live in a world where we can be free
I cannot say what I really feel, should've found an exit
But it came down in just a blink

One day, one day
One day, one day

I met a lot of people on the road, but who is actually my friend?
I cried over a hundred tears, you decided to not listen
So you just left me alone, bad habits got worse
I'm losing my head, but I'm not allowed to say that
Grasp all that I am, rip it away
We all know you shaped me into a hollow shell
So everyone would see I'm just a talking mannequin
I hope one day we live in a world where we can be free
Bind me for life to use me
But I just wanted to accomplish my dreams
It all went down in just a blink

To tell the truth, this industry is killing me
I'm just a product of the food chain they're building
They feed me cents, even though I'm number one
But without me, they wouldn't even be on top
Your promo is just for your picture-perfect image
A contract is the reason I've stayed up this long living dead
For all you put me through, I'm paying a debt
Never thought fame would ruin my success
But I was always hoping one day I'd be free
Just living in a world where there are no restraints
To love who I love and just be like everyone else
But that was too much to ask for

BLINK (Demo)

VERUŚ​ is my solo music project where I share my experiences throughout the years with metaphors. ​My story began with trauma, which led me to be depressed growing up and struggle with speaking my mind and showing feelings. I wasn't prepared to fall in love and break my own heart, but that started my journey of self-discovery, making me question everything. 

I found a way to express what I'd been holding in through songwriting, making various albums and posting a few demos online. I still have a lot to learn in terms of composing with instruments, but I have over a hundred tracks written that deserve to be heard. I hope someday I can bring them all to light. 

The writing and singing never stop though.

Band: @yangst

VERUŚ

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