Lo-fi confessional from Dr. Foss. Wide Open Dreams is about dropping the excuses, pressing record, and creating with what you’ve got. The gear was never the issue. Fear was.

Wide Open Dreams

🔥 New Track Out Now! 🔥  
Title: [Lost in the Map]  
Produced by: [Music RooM]  

This track is a blend of real bars, raw emotion, and authentic rap vibes.  
If you're into real hip hop, storytelling, or trap beats – this one's for you.  

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Lost in the Map

(The voice is heavier now, the '90s rhythm slowed down by the weight of years. It’s quiet, like talking to oneself in an empty room.)

Funny thing about silence... it's the heaviest damn thing in the world. Used to be the noise never stopped. The block was a symphony, you hear me? Laughter, tires screechin', Biggie blastin' from a window, my brother clownin' somebody... that was the soundtrack. Now? Now I just hear the wind whistlin' down the street, and it sounds empty.

I walk down these blocks and I see ghosts on every corner. That stoop right there... that's where me and my cousins planned our whole lives. That court is where my boys and I thought we were the next Knicks. I still turn my head sometimes, to holler at my brother when I see somethin' wild... then the quiet hits me right in the chest. A gut punch, every time. The whole damn choir is gone, son. It's a solo act now. No friends, no cousins, no brother. No f'body left on the stage with me.

And this ain't even my Brooklyn no more. The Ville... they turned it into a damn theme park for people who used to be scared to get off the train here. They power-washed the soul right off the concrete. And Caracas? Caricuao? That's just a dream I had a long time ago. Another ghost. Two whole worlds I came from, and I can't go home to either one. They're just gone. Vapor.

All the stories, all the inside jokes, all the beefs... they live and die right here, in my damn head. I'm a walkin' cemetery. And people see me, they see the gray in my beard, and they think, "Damn, he's strong. A survivor." That ain't strength. It's a curse.

It's painful as fuck. You know what it's like to be the only one who remembers? To have a whole universe of people alive in your head but not a single damn soul to sit and have a beer with?

Yeah, I'm the last man standing. But you ain't standin' tall when you're the last one. You're just... left. Left to watch the credits roll on a movie everybody else already went home from. And you just gotta sit there, alone in the dark. Word is bond.

Brooklynite

Veneno

Get it on iTunes

[Verse 1]  
Echoes claw the skull's backdoor, fingers slick with yesterday's rot  
Chasin' ghosts that grin like exes, teeth filed sharp on forgotten plots  
Mind's a sewer rat sprint, dodgin' floods of what-ifs gone sour  
Pills rattle like loose change in a coffin, buyin' hours by the hour  
Fists pound the mirror till it spits blood confessions, "You ain't king"  
Crown's a noose of neon lies, swingin' low where the weak hearts cling  
Demons DJ the static, scratchin' tracks of "almost was" on repeat  
Feet drag through tar-pit thoughts, sinkin' slow, no lifeline, no beat  
Rage bubbles up like bad acid, burnin' bridges to bone-dry ash  
Last laugh's a wheeze from the void, echoin' "crash, you fool, crash"  

[Chorus]  
Shadows slither, swallow whole, no mercy in the swallow's throat  
Chasin' tails in black-hole basements, where the light forgot to show  
Yell till lungs cave, "Come get me!"—they just laugh and let you choke  
Mind's meat grinder, churnin' dreams to dust, one hopeless poke  
Shadows, shadows, pull me under, drown the fire in your ink  
Chasin', bleedin', never winnin', just the brink and bitter brink  
Echo back my broken howls, make the crowd scream it thin  
Shadows win, shadows win, let the spiral spin us in  

[Verse 2]  
Woke up tastin' rust and regret, tongue thick with unsaid goodbyes  
Eyes like cracked phone screens, scrollin' scrolls of alibis that die  
Friends fade to pixels, ghosts in group chats, typin' "we good?" lies  
Bottle's bottom mocks the promise, "One more swig, then you fly"  
But wings are wet rags, clipped by doubts that nest in ribcage cracks  
Nights stack like unpaid bills, interest pilin' panic attacks  
Whispers from the wallpaper peel, "Quit pretendin', you're the hack"  
Laughter's a luxury tax, paid in tears that streak the track  
Fury's a flat tire on the freeway, spinnin' wild, no traction left  
Just skid marks of "shoulda" leadin' to the cliff where hope went deaf  

[Chorus]  

[Verse 3]  
Threads of sanity fray like cheap socks, trippin' over toe-stub truths  
Youth's a scam artist, sold me futures wrapped in fool's proof  
Now I'm pawnin' memories for matches, lightin' fuses to the fuse  
Boom—scattered shards of "me" rain down, nothin' left but the blues  
Rivals in my head hall, circlin' like vultures on a vibe  
Pickin' clean the carcass of confidence, leavin' gristle to survive  
Scream at ceilings stained with smoke rings from cigars of "why try?"  
They stare back blank, judgin' silent, "Boy, you're just another die"  
Twist the knife of nostalgia slow, carve out chunks of what burned bright  
Left with embers that mock the hunger, starvin' fierce in endless night  

[Bridge]  
Breathe it in, the rot-rose scent, petals wiltin' on the vine  
One step from the edge, toes curl 'round nothin', spine's a crooked line  
What if the chase ends empty? Just a loop of "you again"  
Fists unclench, drop the fight—let the dark twins pull you in  
But nah, spark flares wild, veins pump venom, "Not yet, you pricks!"  
Rage rebirth, a glitch in the gloom, teeth bared for the fix  
Shadows scatter for a sec, then regroup, thicker, meaner twist  
Cycle spins eternal, suck the soul dry with a kiss  

[Verse 4]  
Barrel down the brain-storm alley, thunder thoughts crack like whips  
Lips spit lightning bolts of spite, zappin' doubts to smoky strips  
Exes haunt the rearview, smirks say "Told ya, kid, you slipped"  
Grip the wheel white-knuckled, swervin' 'round the pit they dug quick  
Pockets full of IOUs from gods who ghosted on the deal  
Heal? That's a punchline for the privileged, feel the raw, unpeel  
Walls close in like bad trips, graffiti screams your failures loud  
Crowd it out with curses chained, a torrent tearin' through the cloud  
Endgame's a whisper: "Fold now, save the ache"—but fuck that plea  
I'll chase these bastards to the marrow, burn the whole damn tree

Shadows Win

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RONIN

Looping heart

I'm feeling so hollow
Like the pity I swallow
Like darkness is inches away
And I'm breathing in sorrow

And I'm done with this fight
And I'm done hiding it
I've had a poison in my veins
And I'm done riding

That's me being frozen
To hell with corrosion
I'm done being broken
By my own erosion
I'm so done giving up
To these phantom voices
I've had a serpent in my skull
And he's eating my choices
I've had a serpent in my skull
And he's eating my choices

I'm sick of feeling whips crackling my spine
I'm sick of feeling drained like I'm bleeding time
It's like I've got a cage and I'm locked inside
Man, I'm screaming, but I can't even find the light

I'm done sinking, oh, can I break it or not?
How many of them fake smiles do I got?
How many more nights will I waste in my head
Full of rage at myself like I'm racing to dead

Well, this is me ripping myself from the grave
This is a key for a prisoner's cage
This is my war to reclaim what I made
I'm coming for blood like my anger's a blade
Yeah, I'm just a monster in chains
I'm like a spark in the dark trying to break from the pain
I've been given these scars of mine
And if that's not enough, man, then what kind of life is mine?

That's me being frozen
To hell with corrosion
I'm done being broken
By my own erosion
I'm so done giving up
To these phantom voices
I've had a serpent in my skull
And he's eating my choices
I've had a serpent in my skull
And he's eating my choices

I see the serpent now as clear as bone and teeth
I see it crawling through my thoughts
Feeding on what I could fear to keep me beneath
I see the serpent now as clear as you and me
Maybe it's a lie to be free
But I see truth
So let's get venom off these fangs
Alright!

That's me being frozen
To hell with corrosion
I'm done being broken
By my own erosion
I'm so done giving up
To these phantom voices
I've had a serpent in my skull
And he's eating my choices
I've had a serpent in my skull
And he's eating my choices

Serpent In My Skull

“Schatten” (Shadow) is an introspective song about the tension between inner darkness and the effort to reclaim light. The narrator notices external brightness but feels an internal deficit; a persistent shadow—symbolizing doubt, trauma, stagnation, or social pressure—follows and resists warmth. The song moves from recognition of that weight through a struggle to outrun and outshine it, toward a deliberate choice to hold onto light even when it burns. Pain and scars are reframed as sources of transformation: vulnerability becomes a kind of gold, anger is converted into purpose, and radiance is learned as an active discipline. The chorus offers a collective call to radiate so strongly that the shadow loses its hold, while later verses accept the shadow as part of the self but no longer its master. The closing affirms an inner sea of light that ultimately prevents the shadow from taking over.

Lyrics

Ich guck in die Sonne und seh das Licht,  
doch tief in mir sagt was: „Das reicht mir nicht.“  
Der Schatten bleibt, zieht Kreise im System,  
als würd er mich begleiten, wohin ich auch geh.  

Ich renn dem Licht nach, bis der Tag zerreißt,  
mein Kopf voll Sturm, der Rest vereist.  
Ich seh die Sonne, doch sie wärmt mich nicht –  
der Schatten bleibt mein Gegengewicht.  

Wir müssen strahlen, mehr strahlen, bis es schmerzt,  
bis der Schatten sieht, dass er nichts erreicht in unserm Herz.  
Denn Licht gewinnt, wenn du es teilst,  
der Schatten bleibt – nur, wenn du in ihm verweilst.  

Ich schreib mit schwarzer Tinte auf ’nem gold’nen Tag,  
mal Hoffnung, mal Zweifel – alles, was ich hab.  
Der Schatten flüstert leis, er klingt vertraut,  
erzählt von all dem, was man selten glaubt.  
Ich lauf im Kreis, verlauf mich in Gedanken,  
mein Spiegelbild trägt seinen Frust, bringt es ins wanken  
Doch tief im Herz, da glüht noch Glanz,  
und ich tanz im Staub des Untergangs.  

Ich lauf der Sonne nach, doch sie bleibt fern,  
greif nach dem Licht – verbrenne mir die Hand so gern.  
Ich muss strahlen, mehr strahlen als der Rest,  
denn Stillstand frisst mich wie mein ungeliebter Frust.  
Und der Schatten rennt mir hinterher, er zieht mich weg, mit Zwängen.  
mein Herz pumpt Feuer, doch mein Kopf bleibt gefangen.  

Ich fall, doch steh auf, weil ich weiß, wer ich bin,  
selbst wenn der Schatten mir sagt: „Du hast keinen Sinn.“  
Ich halt mich ans Licht, auch wenn alles verbrennt,  
bis keine Dunkelheit mehr meine Richtung lenkt.  

Ich seh den Schatten tanzen in mir drin,  
mal zieht er mich runter, mal gibt er Sinn.  
Er redet laut, doch ich hör ihn nun kaum,  
denn ich bau mein Licht zu ’nem neuen Raum.  
Ich trage Narben wie ein goldnes Kleid,  
aus Schmerz wird Glanz, aus Wut wird Zeit.  
Ich lern zu leuchten, auch wenn keiner’s checkt –  
mein Weg aus dem Dunkel, zu meinem eigenen Zweck.  

Wir müssen strahlen, mehr strahlen, bis es schmerzt,  
bis der Schatten sieht, dass er nichts erreicht in unserm Herz.  
Denn Licht gewinnt, wenn du es teilst,  
der Schatten bleibt – nur, wenn du in ihm verweilst.  

Ich gucke in die Sonne, seh das Licht,  
und der Schatten bleibt – doch er nimmt mich nicht.  
Denn tief in mir, da brennt das Lichtermeer,  
und ich strahl, bis in mir keiner Schatten mehr.

© 2025 Martin Oliver Beinersdorf. All rights reserved.  
Lyrics and concept by Martin Oliver Beinersdorf. Do not reproduce, distribute, or adapt without explicit permission.

Schatten

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The Heart No Lie

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