Mr. Miyagi trained me very well for this battle

Houdini:

It’s the great Houdini, instead of a rabbit it seems like I pulled out a weenie. It jumped out’ my hat, tried to beat me, but with a single snap, I beat him easy, peasy!

Why the hell is he qualified to be a doctor? Now that’s Strange
I’m smarter than you, whilst blood is rushing through my brain! 

Take that goofy cape of yours, get out, and take flight,
First your car, then your movie, and now you'll crash in this fight!

I made magic magnificent, all you do is stand there while your team’s efficient, but it brings in the cents, so I guess it makes sense why they made a sequel to your fake BS!

A true magician never reveals his tricks
But that accent needs more than magic

I’m known all around the world for my brilliance in escaping
So you know they’re no comparison when you can’t even escape a teen!

Strange:


Your greedy ass didn't stop, when you nearly died?
You can hang upside down? I can literally control time!

I’m on the big screen, so get back to your stage 
Misleading the audience with all your ads on pages!
Stop with the public nudity, and they call me strange?
Let's hope the ropes are as stiff as your vocal range!


Can you keep your 2 sweeties well with your hat and wand?
Nowadays, you would be a bigger side-show than Wong!

Tell me I’m wrong, now I’m no psychic, 
But I know that in this battle, you’ll be losing

You’re crazy if you think you’ll win, c’mon!
should’ve kept that straight jacket on!
I saved the universe, you escaped a box 
You won’t be able to escape this paradox


Escaped the belly of a whale? I thought you loved your mom! 
Shut up, like Copperfield with your vintage stuff

You’re a weakling, that’s something  you need to confront 
I can take you down with a single punch 



Houdini
I can swallow needles, be buried alive, and withstood all of that strain
But listening to you for more than 20 seconds brings me the most pain! (presto)

In this fight you're getting schooled, call me the ancient one, 
but even the great Houdini could help this simpleton!
I'm the true master, stop with your fake witchery,
Haven't seen a fool this fake since, Thurston!

Even with the time stone, you can't take back these bars
'Cause, when you're beaten’ you'll see more than this star!

Ladies, and gentlemen, watch as I do this next trick!, 
Abracadabra! He literally meets his Doom, and that's it!


Strange 

I put the MC in the MCU, you don’t trick me, everyone can see you!
I wish to unsee you, take that eyeliner off you, or you’ll be hanging, upright, gonna off you!
Step away, you know what happened the last time you did not take a doctor's advice!
It’s safe to say, a single kids puny punch will do more than suffice 

I saved galaxies, assembled the avengers 
Stick to copying, i was trained by a great mentor
And all that hard work brought me here today  
To fight a dude who can’t come up with his own name?

Another one bites the dust today 
Hear was this wise guy’s got to say
This will be the one and only time you lose
Cuz use for the first time, this trick isn’t staged.

Harry Houdini vs. Doctor Strange- Rap Battles! (ft. Alex M)

Special Inquisitor Rayyan as Stampy

RaccoonBro as Garfield

Written by Quizzique
Additional Writing Help: Ethan, Rayyan

Mixed by Special Inquisitor Rayyan

Beat produced by J BRING BEATS

Thumbnail Art by GnomeYT

Thumbnail by Quizzique

Lyrics:
Stampy
Hello, this is Stampy, and welcome to a let’s play vid
Today we’re against the scrap pages of Jim Davis
Your schtick is being lazy? That’s mundane
Not feeling up to battling? Must be a case of Mondays!

Your owner’s Jon, but your plot points Aren’t-Buckled
Seems your continuity has Garfield Kart-trouble
Since 2012, I’ve been on that Minecraft star hustle
Born in ‘76, yet you’ve fallen out into a Paws struggle

From Murray to Pratt, you’ve an array of casts
But with your production rights, away they’ve been passed
Sony, Fox and Paramount? You’re the bastard of newspapers
Jim’s flare amounts to having mastered reduced labor

You’re the comic Guinness backs? I must need a break
Eat you in minutes on this track like you were a piece of cake
There are limits that I lack, fighting googlies I attack
Sic my dogs onto your back, since I know they make you quake

Garfield

Yawn About time you wrapped up your verse
Ehh, I’ve heard worse, although I thought you didn’t curse?
Try to keep viewers immersed, but all your content is rehearsed
Wanna leave a mark on YouTube? Try to Hit the Target first

You run a Not-So-Lovely World with all the helpers you’ve locked out
Filled with even more crap than your dog house
Speaking of dogs, you’ve got too many to handle
Left some more dead than a Minecrafter’s channel

You used to be a hit, anyone can attest
Then you took a harder hit than you did with Wonder Quest
Get me a coffee so I can leave this kid maimed
You’ve got me going Ballistic: call that a Squid Game

Now I’m taking names like we’re in the Love Garden
Lost memories are the only thing that heart’s guardin’
I’ve got one last thing that I need to tell you, dude
I bet Lee only left so he could hand the L to you

Stampy
Don’t you dare threaten my dogs, or else when the dust settles
You’ll be in the ground like you were some love love petals!
Barnaby’s my best friend, he fills me with such joy
Jon’s dog loves you, seems he’s just an Odie to Destroy

Garfield
Jeez, that writing was even worse than your book’s, chum
You’re looking Fidgety ‘cause that’s where you took your looks from
Your comedy’s more childish than all of Minecraft’s players
I like my comics like I like my lasagna: with layers!

Stampylongnose Vs Garfield | QUIZZICAL QUARRELS #2 (feat. Special Inquisitor Rayyan & RaccoonBro)

Mewtwo:
Birthed from a lab as the pure form of perfection
My goal was to bring the Pokemon insurrection
And with you I sense there’s a connection
Though I was not the one made from a peasant

I find that I cannot condone your lazy flick
Used your physicality to make a leap of logic with the crazy chick
He was made to be a master of analysis
…and yet he still sided with the crazy chick

Pokedex 150, try to diss, you’ll miss me
I know that your shit’s weak, this psychic type spits heat
You know not what I bring as a challenge you won’t fit me
Know that when I’m rhyming, I don’t spare or pity

The Ultimate Lifeform created with every talent, meant to save mankind but then all your hope was gone
But that should’ve been easily predicted when you try to battle with the god of all Pokemon

Izuru Kamakura:
I must say, I’m oddly perplexed about why you would need to lie of your title
It’s difficult to understand what sort of god loses to a rat and a child?
I was made as the savior of hope, you were made as a DNA clone
That stops being a threat and turned into a pet…if a single Pokeball’s thrown 

Cast Confusion on your foes but the best of your ploys
Was choosing to make a tour guide out of Nurse Joy
The ultimate lifeform can’t seem to do much to harm me
When each iteration sees him needing an army

Meant to be an icon yet you lack the attention
Cause you're as original as your own naming convention 
I could neutralize him before his next turn starts at all
Since it won’t be the first time that he’s cut from Brawls

Mewtwo:
Tell me whose favorite character’s the nihilist punk? 
I’ll leave this Psycho Cut, one swipe and you’re done
And you would’ve remained a Remnant of Despair if
Your facade wasn’t weakened by Chiaki’s hairpin 

Izuru Kamakura:
My past is the path of attack that he’s taken
So I’ll leave all openings Cerulean Caved in 
But I know that Game Freak’s just gonna kill him
Next time they need a Pokemon to fill in for villain

Written by JustGamer
Mewtwo: Fightmarker
Izuru Kamakura: JustGamer
Beat by Dansonn
Mixed by Serena
Cover Art by Rabi
Special thanks to JesseBox

Mewtwo vs Izuru Kamakura - Smash Bros vs Anything

Welcome to the fifteenth installment of “Quick Diss”! We got two… apparently the only connection is that they're alcoholics… today! It's the horse from Horsin' Around, BoJack Horseman! Standing-up against the monster from Moralton, Clay Puppington!

Lyrics:
BoJack Horseman:
Wait a minute, this isn't the bar? It's an introduction!
Get it? 'Cus it's true. Guess I'll fire this puppet
I'd tell you to stuff it but you're clay, Puppington
Consider rehab to clean up your shit… Clay Puppington 
Huh, I'm on my punny shit, get a shot glass and belt it!
Use it as fuel to get your son's ass and belt it
Or maybe don't, 'cus your self "image" can't sell it
While I get rich off my own portraits for shelvin'

Clay Puppington:
Orel! Why's there a horse person on my lawn, shoo!
That's not possible, that's not something that God's do
I'm lost; truthfully, I'd need a cross before I cross you!
Uh…wait, I think it's a guy in a costume…
Huh, crude. That you drink up a whooole bottle
When animals don't have souls to go full throttle
On benders, just swallowing their own problems 
You run out of hay? Then say bye to your close trauma
Ya see Horseman, I'm not mad, I'm just disappointed
With one appointment prison could've been avoided
But no, you boinked it. Remember the lost commandment!
"Thou shalt take accountability for all their damage"

BoJack Horseman:
What are YOU doing here? Oh shit, it's a rap battle
Thaaat's why your pants stood on after that babble
And I got baggage? Please, your pansy knees can't hold your baggy jeans
A different kinda praying the way Danielle Shaped your family.
Twice you'd get on your knees for a blonde turd
Now you and Shapey can bond over "our Father"
THAT'S Orel, I should be posting this
Your wife don't need coaching for you not to be her one and only
BIIITCH, you're a gross fruit, and Honey Dew is gross so;
Ask Blob, "honey, do you love me?" She don't though.
Go loathe in your study, associate punchin' with lovey-dovey
My dad was also an ass but we're related to them buddy!
Go suck a dick dumb-shit! *Bronx Cheer*
Take THAT dribble on the chin like your one kid.
He settled with Bloberta after she conned him
Didn't take a star to burn out your "lovin". (Haah.)

Clay Puppington:
Stinkin' dead end battle. I mean, why the long face?   
Cus you tried to ship yourself with a teenager one day?
But hey! With all that fornicating it's a habit!
Guess you can say horses are just… nature's rabbits.
Let's take the bandage off your pathetic past
No amount of alcohol is disinfecting that!
So I'll swig it, ahh, that's refreshing man
Diane ditched em! Can't cat-call to get her back
Ask Carolyn why'd she quit working on you
Didn't ask when Sarah Lynn quit twerking on you!
BoJacks heroine overdoses on his heroin!
Couldn't thread the needle; and now she's dead as sin!
You're a stupid piece of shit…choked like your chick
Blew your load. But, Herb wasn't minding it    
You pathetic bastard, look at ya. Set up to a joke
A horse walks into a bar and makes amends, nope, he croaks
Holly-Hawk couldn't watch her brother proudly
Trying the easy way out via smother, drowning
Being BoJack IS nature, your mom's hilarious 
Take the fucking shortcut. Secretariat a-bridged.

BoJack Horseman:
Sometimes I feel like I was born with a leak.
And I still got better flow than this tortured poor thing
Killed your own mother with a bottle of ketchup 
Then dad bottles his emotions in hopes you would fess up
But you didn't, so you burrow
Shot your kid and didn't even get a churro
So curdle in your mommy kinks, stuck in your person
I could egg you on but, you're not even worth it.

-CAST-
BoJack Horseman: Arkham
Clay Puppington: Grey Julius

-PRODUCTION-
Thumbnail by: JaCoN
Written by: JaCoN
Beat: http://www.shadowville.com/audio//Shadowville.com%20-%20Suffocate.mp3
Beat Produced by: 2Deep, Patrick Carney, and Dee
Mixed by: Danii


BoJack Horseman vs Clay Puppington - (Quick Diss) #15

Re-Destro : Alex M
Dr.Doofenshmirtz : MetaMachine

Written by Kamren
Beat Prod : AnywayWell
Mixed by Danii
Thumbnail by CreeperPasta
Art by Cyan and Luke Reardon!

Re-Destro :
What is this? I hadn't mind a pharmacist to liberate
Not that I even could merely looking at the stage today
Tragic backstory, pointless Inator
Cursed by a mammal, says "see ya later"
Repeat the pattern for a whole summer 
Then crash Milo for a season of comfort 
I thought I had it rough, but I've got to stress
That if its not enough, you're beat by a pet
My goals are for my father, I'll carry both alone
Your parents only showed when you're a garden gnome 

Dr.Doofenshmirtz :
Per-Re the Destro, that verse was unexpected 
And of course by that I mean COMPLETELY EXPECTED!
With an ego that inflated, I'd mistake you for Balloony
Now watch as this beat drops and Shigaraki's not controlling me!
My Inators are always blowing up but man, your Self Destruction’s prone
Really thought you were catching hands till your legs gave out and you let go
Of the position you once held, now that's Evil Incorporated
But I wouldn’t use this puppet’s nickel when your whole look is copy pasted!
Wait.. have we done this before? Its all confusing
Its hard to remember when your personalities' 2D
Quite the Norm for villains like you, you'd fit in L.O.V.E.M.U.F.F.I.N
So make like our noses, get to the point and don't  push my buttons 

Re-Destro :
I’d say you got a glow up but I’m the beacon for it
Couldn’t make time for Vanessa yet its what you’re controllin?
Trapped in your own cycle of embarrassments and the worst part?
Isabella’s better at Adulting, she’s younger than you are!
You’re a Professor that couldn’t Impress me
I'd cry but a tear isn't worth shedding
For the Hunchback of The Tri-State
When your brother's the reason behind your hate!
So take this L and why don't you project this to Monogram?
After I'm done, he'll want to call this Night of the Living Dead Man

Dr.Doofenshmirtz :
Even though I'm Heinz, I couldn't catch up to where your story ends
But here's something I've never done : Got caught by the feds 
Tried to rebel against all for Curiosity's sake
But the only headline you'll be making will be dropping her grave!
Now behold, The Battle of The Month-Inator!
Do as I say and score my raps as your favored!

Perry The Platypus : 
*casual chattering noises*

Dr.Doofenshmirtz : 
Wait, Perry The Platypu-

(Perry destroys the Battle of The Month-Inator)

Dr. Doofenshmirtz :
No!! Curse you Perry the Platypus!... and random anime character that looks like me but mostly Perry the Platypus!

ReDestro vs Dr.Doofenshmirtz - My Hero Academia vs Anything! #9 (ft. Alex M and MetaMachine)

Lyrics/Beat: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1oRqEeEbJ6oVLUtx_xc6Ty9FjCOzXYKQOMhJWQeV--5g/edit
Alex M. as Junkrat
garbageGothic as Misato Tachibana
Matt Raichous as Roadhog
RaccoonBroVA as Koujirou Sasahara
Written by Legengo and MetaMachine
Mixing by Special Inquisitor Rayyan
Beat arrangement by Raisu Battles
Thumbnail by JK03
Beat by Anywaywell
Hint for next OVvA: "Running Tracks at Record Speed"

Junkrat vs. Misato Tachibana - Overwatch vs. Anything #1

Written by: CreeperPasta 
Beat produced by: Rajaste
Mixed by: CreeperPasta
Thumbnail by: LimJJ
Flowtest by: Theme Park Avenue
Mr Pickles: Dr.Dee
Binky: Kamren
Presentator: Quizzique 
Arthur: CreeperPasta
Arthur's Dad: JustGamer
Francine: CreeperPasta
Muffy: DerpiesGamingBlast


Presentator: 
You Gotta Be Kidding Me: A game for kids and grown ups. What's the problem, Arthur?

Arthur: 
Binky is still fucking my mother, and ever since he came to my house, DW has been missing. What should I do?

Arthur's Dad: 
Here's a tip, Arthur. Get me out of here.

Francine: 
It's ok, Binky is fucking my mother too. You'll get used to it.

Muffy: 
You should mind your business. You'll live longer that way.

Binky: 
Nobody said you couldn't join us, Arthur.

Mr Pickles: 
I know exactly how to deal with your mother, Arthur.

First made her giggle no tickle (uh)
Then made her tickle my pickle (uh)
Killing them all like a sicko (uh)
Make holes in your mind with no prickles (uh)
Do you wanna fight? You're bark and no bite
Don't fuck around with Mr Pickles (uh)
If these bitches bite, oh yes, these bitches bite
Like Tommy, I react with giggles, uh
I'm a different beast from a different breed. I love the taste of minced meat (ruff!)
You're P-BS for an ARG, and as shitpost, you just piss me off
At least I'm loyal to my human. You see your friends as your enemies
You need discipline, so serve me or I serve you to my pet Steve.

Binky:
I took a bath with Arthur's mom, but you're the one who's washed up
Lesser Lassie's trapped in a well. Let's see you get out with more trash talk.
A beast, a threat? To whom, may I ask? It's time you face the facts
You died soulless, and Sheriff replaced you in time as Grandpa gave you the ax 
No more secrets, Mr Pickles. You don't scare me in the least
You may lay down deep on your lair, but you can't hide from this beast
I solve problems. I help people. I seek to achieve perfection
You're a vermin, son of a witch. I hope you like vivisections

Mr Pickles:
Trash talk? I speak the language that makes my bidding get done
From now on, anyone who repeats your verses is speaking in a dead tongue 
So don't threaten me with a good time. Now it's time to say goodbye 
As I rip your limbs, break your ribs and I eat your flesh under the moonlight 

Binky:
Try that on me, your balls come off. Keep this horny beast locked up.
Animals, corpses, your verses, your series. All of those things, you fucked up.
Another problem solved, you knew how this ended deep down.
But cheer up, Mr Pickles. Your corpse will look nice in my treehouse.

Mr Pickles vs Binky (You Gotta Be Kidding Me) - Rap Assault

I've decided to release a few battles on SoundCloud before the videos are finished. HOWEVER, I'll only be releasing battles that are publicly known, so if the matchup hasn't been said in my server, it won't see SoundCloud until release.

Titanium1208 as Aku
RaccoonBroVA as Big Jack Horner
Cri as Ethical Bug

Beat by Pendo46
Written and Mixed by Matt Raichous


AKU
Long ago, I faced off with a man I came to hate
Now today, I will finish off the Samura- oh, wait
You are not that fool… just some child who is sick
A nursery rhyme who ate nothing but pies, then grew up extra thick!
Rushing blindly forward for a wish ‘cause it’s your only hope
To gain the fame and glory that you once lost to Pinocchio
An awful businessman, and a worse performer
Go back to your plums, and return to your corner

JACK
I pronounce this battle… a waste of my time
Why should I care about this demon tree who’s past his prime?
You’re a petty shape-shifter, not some harbinger of doom
Just another magic creature I can lock inside my trophy room!
Call in the Baker’s Dozen, we’ve got another mission
To find the Lord of Evil hiding back behind his minions
‘Cause beating this cowardly crook will be a piece of pie
Shoot a horn through your eye, what a good boy am I

AKU
You dare insult the evil that is Aku?
You’re no Samurai, but you are indeed a fool
You expect me to cower from a fairy tale Kingpin?
After that awful verse, I see why you need a phoenix
Beaten by some cats and a little blonde orphan?
Not even Death itself was enough of a diversion
You made it to the Wishing Star, and nearly brought your foes to end
But sank into the Earth, you should have listened to your bug friend!

ETHICAL BUG (SPOKEN)
Sweet Mother of Goose, Jack!
That was horrible!
His disses were horrible!
He’s horrible!
He’s an irredeemable monster!

JACK
Irredeemable monster? Or a villain that was half-assed?
I won’t be taken down by a freak that children laugh at
You had a thriving gig, ‘til you were dropped by your affiliates
Took thirteen years to reach the end, what took you so long, idiot? 
This “Master of Darkness” with a tragic design
Won’t be laughing for much longer once his magic is mine
I was worried for a second that I’d come out defeated
But Jack beats Aku again, history repeated

Big Jack Horner Vs. Aku - Saturday Morning Rap Bonus

Snakebite126 / Dudz as Daniel LaRusso (Audio / Visual)
Vladimyr P. as Spider-Man

Lyrics: 
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1mAEnYANe1Pi3f_mn-vTn84bQ2NLX9BIfV_CmXT7bLVY/edit?usp=sharing

Written by: Vlad, King Can Productions, and Froggy
Beat Producer: Hollywood Legend
Audio Mixer / Effects: Vlad
Beat Mixer: Freshy Kanal
Cover Art Made by Vlad

The Amazing Spider-Man vs The Karate Kid. Universal Rap Battles

idk how the fuck im gonna edit this so here's an early audio release

RaccoonBroVA as Ozpin
Alex M. as Zanza
Written by Special Inquisitor Rayyan and Rosenthal
Mixed by Light
Beat by Dansonn
Temp cover art by Special Inquisitor Rayyan

Lyrics: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1JqQ-pcM16OXxGHELiBvnkZpU65OwPW0HBTlqnKOxQaA/edit?usp=sharing

Ozpin vs Zanza. SIR Rap Battles Season 2 (ft. RaccoonBroVA & Alex M.)

Grasman as Rick Sanchez, Matt Raichous as Ford Pines. Mixed by Zagranis
Rick (Robot):
I see what this is, we’re in a rap battle Morty,
Against a beat up old man with a tragic backstory? 
He’s got an overcoat on, and has traveled the galaxy?
Christ, the citadel doesn’t have as much clones of me- *gets deactivated*

Rick:
Your dumbass really fell for that? We aren’t alike at all
You tried doing what I do, and got sucked up by your one portal!
Cant spit ice, but gave your bro the cold shoulder, sore loser
mind’s as hollow as that bag of peanuts that ruined your future!


Ford:
Have you come to steal my eyes?! I’d really hope you have, see
Because Christ, I’m sure that face is an anomaly
Alcoholic tries to forget the horror like McGucket did
Join the Blind Eye and erase those awful memories
I’m so cracked, refer to me as the rift 
The only time you’re ever cracked’s the windshield of your ship
And I wouldn’t let weirdo around a kid
Or you’re about to catch a six-fingered fist!











Rick:
What’s my man blud waffling on about (frrrr)
Fricken’ Snake Jazz has got more appeal 
You wasted 8 bars on how I'm looking?
The only time you’re golden’s when my back’s itching
MOrty- t-to take this bastard down, i've got just (burp) the trick,
I turned myself into a rapper Morty, I’M RAPPER RIIICK!!!!!!!
You almost caused the very end of your dimension  
Just to chill out for 30 years in the M Dimension 
And when your brother went through crap to save your ass 
And even after that you couldn’t say “Thanks”?
I travel multiverses and explore different timelines 
You got stuck up on a single town in your entire lifetime 
You ain’t got  bars, sixer, you can’t show me what you got 
Gotta new catchphrase, cuz I took two dubs!

Stan:
You’re getting played, Rick, and I’m not talking Fortnite 
Do people still play that? I haven't been here for a long time
For a title character, you wouldn’t expect such a villain 
You’re doc brown but more 2 dimensional than Bill is
And if you wanna talk creations, Rick
Not only did you dip, but were you high on acid?
Your thirst for revenge leaves a trail of destruction  
You’re a twisted man who sees people as functions 
On the track? You crashed, like your wife and life, see
on the mic? You’re rapping like a Kirkland Meeseeks
got an ego bigger than your IQ, hurting the people you knew 
The smartest man in the universe? The loneliest too. 
Incredible. The natural law of Rick, I studied this years ago!
A broken man, full of self hate that at the end of the day’s got nothing to show.

Stanford Pines vs. Rick Sanchez- Rap Battles! (Ft. Matt Raichous) [2023]

-Rap Music w/Explicit Content
-ERB Type Content
-Trippy Aesthetic

The Amazing Spider-Man vs The Karate Kid. Universal Rap Battles

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